Discuss and Rate the Last Film You Watched

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Bob_McMillan

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Watched Spider-man No Way Home at home.

Wow, the first half sure is really fucking boring the second time around. To the point that we just fast forwarded to the moment Maguire and Garfield show up. When we did that, the movie became just as fun as the first time we watched it.

As much as I still enjoyed the movie, it's even more obvious to me now that this was a once in a lifetime thing and every movie in the next decade or so that's going to try to ape it is gonna be diminishing returns. Looking at you, Dr Strange and Flashpoint.
 
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BrawlMan

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it's even more obvious to me now that this was a once in a lifetime thing and every movie in the next decade or so that's going to try to ape it is gonna be diminishing returns. Looking at you, Dr Strange and Flashpoint.
No Way Home was aping Spider-Verse. Nothing against the former, but pointing it out. I can't speak for Flashpoint, but Doctor Strange is going to be fine. It's pretty obvious that multiverse is a thing now for mainstream superhero movies. Flashpoint I am still looking forward to, and I'm curious.
 

Johnny Novgorod

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The Tinder Swindler

Documentary about conniving piece of shit Simon Leviev, who would scam Tinder dates by pretending to be in the diamond business, affecting great wealth (using money he'd scammed from an earlier victim to afford private jets and lavish island hopping) and then faking an attack from his 'enemies', at which point he would ask for for a quick loan from the victim and then disappear 'for their own good'. Rinse and repeat.

The theatrics are so obvious I want to believe most of the women he tried to scam saw through the con. The three women interviewed for the documentary come across as not very bright. It's amazing how easily and almost unprompted they hand over their life savings to some guy purely because he affected enough wealth to seem like he could be trusted with them. And how they keep doing it too, not just once; in exchange for phony watches and bank statements they don't even have the brains to double check. Partly because, I suspect, they don't want to believe they're being ripped off, and it's easier to maintain denial by continuing to bleed money.
 
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Thaluikhain

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As much as I still enjoyed the movie, it's even more obvious to me now that this was a once in a lifetime thing and every movie in the next decade or so that's going to try to ape it is gonna be diminishing returns. Looking at you, Dr Strange and Flashpoint.
Eh, Doctor Who got away with the same basic idea a few times, but yeah, most likely they'll be even more terrible than most superhero films.
 

Specter Von Baren

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The Tinder Swindler

Documentary about conniving piece of shit Simon Leviev, who would scam Tinder dates by pretending to be in the diamond business, affecting great wealth (using money he'd scammed from an earlier victim to afford private jets and lavish island hopping) and then faking an attack from his 'enemies', at which point he would ask for for a quick loan from the victim and then disappear 'for their own good'. Rinse and repeat.

The theatrics are so obvious I want to believe most of the women he tried to scam saw through the con. The three women interviewed for the documentary come across as not very bright. It's amazing how easily and almost unprompted they hand over their life savings to some guy purely because he affected enough wealth to seem like he could be trusted with them. And how they keep doing it too, not just once; in exchange for phony watches and bank statements they don't even have the brains to double check. Partly because, I suspect, they don't want to believe they're being ripped off, and it's easier to maintain denial by continuing to bleed money.
I mean, the scam callers trying to sell you something or convince you that for one reason or another you need to give them your information happen because there's at least enough people falling for it to make it feasible to do.
 
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MrCalavera

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TITANE

If you heard of this movie, it is probably because of the ridiculous premise - A woman has sex with a car. Litteraly.
To go even even further, Alex, our auto-erotic(metalsexual? chrome-o-sexual?) protagonist finds out her one-night-stand with a handsome american machine came with a side-effect. The usual one. She notices her belly's getting bigger. How? Who cares, logistics of motoreproduction aren't really a point here. (Have i also mentioned, she's a serial killer?) And that's only the first 30 minutes of the movie.
However, soon cronenbergian shock therapy takes the back seat.

What drives the plot forward from now on is slow psychological drama. Engaging with issues like identity, gender roles, parent-child relationship, coping with a sudden loss of someone, and love. Part of me wishes, the wild ride movie started with lasted longer. What recompensates it is brilliant role of Vincent Lyndon. While i have nothing to complain about Agathe's Rouselle(Alex) performance - it's a hard one to pull off, and she does it well - Lyndon elevates the whole thing. His interaction with Alex, varies beautifully, from tender to uncomfortable(at some points appearing borderline incestuous, but thankfully, not crossing the line in the end) - deliberately echoing complicated nature of what they're going through.

Good, but unusual movie, that for some reason made me think it'd be even better as a musical.




NIGHTMARE ALLEY

Another Guillermo Del Toro creation.
We follow the footsteps of Stanton "Stan" Carlisle. Film starts with him burrying something under floor, and setting a secluded building on fire. For now, his reasons remaining shrouded in mystery. After jumping off a bus to nowhere, Stan finds a job at traveling carnival. A 'Geek Show', one of many in the United States, around the time of Great Depression. Stan fits there well, among drifters not dissimilar to him - with their own secrets and old shames. Good-looking and quite charming, he learns the trade of a carney, and the con-art of "reading" people - particularly convincing them that one can read in minds and speak to the dead.
After a while he leaves with another carnival employee/new girlfriend, set up to start his own bussiness. Soon, forgetting about hidden dangers of the con, his mentor warned him about.

The movie is shot beautifully. Opening act nailing the atmosphere of an early XXc. freak show carnival - an aesthetic that i'm sure is very dear to Del Toro's "greasy heart". Later shifts to a noir thriller plot, with stunning art deco sets, but still holding onto the dark, "Weird Tales" pulp-like atmosphere. Bustling with a gallery of characters, with prolly the most celebratory entourage Del Toro gathered so far. You got: Willem Defoe, Toni Collette, Bradley Cooper, and of course Ron Perlman, among others. Each very well cast. Even Cooper, whos phenomenon i don't get, is a good fit for affable, yet somehow troubled Carlisle.

Obligatory viewing for GDT fans out there.
 
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Agema

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I mean, the scam callers trying to sell you something or convince you that for one reason or another you need to give them your information happen because there's at least enough people falling for it to make it feasible to do.
There's a bit of a difference. Both are targetting vulnerable people, but where scam callers are probably exploiting people who are a bit... slow in some way (elderly, naive, learning disabled) people like the "Tinder Swindler" are targetting people who are often quite smart and successful. They are still vulnerable in some way, but much less obviously so.

Cons in documentaries seem incredibly stupid to fall for because you have hindsight the victim doesn't by being primed that they are cons, and because the documentary will never really be able to truly convey how the con-artist has manipulated their victims into trusting them.

In a sense, I think we all fall for lots of cons, we just don't quite recognise them as cons. For instance in the sphere of employment, I think of workers do things over and above the call of duty with an understanding that they get something (a bonus, a promotion, a glowing reference) which will never materialise: instead their boss or company just takes it and runs.
 

Ezekiel

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Batman Forever

I remember now why I never fully watched this as a kid. The fight scenes are bad (Where did that guy come from? When did he change positions like that?), the sets are ugly, the costumes are gross, the futuristic badly rendered alien CG Gotham City looks nothing like the sets, Robin is clearly too old to be adopted by Bruce Wayne and I hate his earring, the characters are bland, the music sucks, the car looks like a toy, Jim Carrey is too much, and nothing interesting happens with Two-Face (just laughs along with Riddler for the most part). There is this underlying self-deprecation masked as humor through the whole thing, which would feel deserved if the movie really was a comedy. But it doesn't quite commit to that; it wants to have real drama, which is badly written or delivered with intentionally hammy acting.




That's stupid, Batman. You're stupid.

I was kind of bored. When something that was supposed to be exciting or humorous happened, I tended to have this dumb, sad, open-mouthed look on my face that said, "What the fuck am I watching?" I'm glad that my curiosity is fulfilled, because some people keep saying it's a good, fun movie. But I found it bad.
 

Dwarvenhobble

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Where, though? Nothing I've seen in The Expanse is particuarly gory.

If we're talking about Wheel of Time...sure, when the trollocs attack the Two Rivers, for instance. There's plenty of blood and gore there. However, I don't think that's really a GoT-esque inspiration. Most of the gore in GoT came from human violence, the trollocs are monstrous creatures that do monstrous things, made possible by their monstrous size and strength. In that context, gore makes sense.

I could maybe understand a complaint about the trollocs being beefed up. I don't recall them being that 'uber' in the books. Still, "gore=GoT?" Not reall



Which are...?
I mean there were also the sort of implied sex scenes etc but being a Sony production they didn't go as far
 

Dwarvenhobble

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PAN
(Prime Video)

Rating: Imaginative and an original take that certainly flys but very much fails to quite stick the landing

Basic premise: A prequel to Peter Pan telling the tales of various characters in Peter Pan end up in Neverland and their interactions beforehand .

More spoiler containing synopsis Peter is left at an Orphanage as a baby by his mother. Years later he's a child in the same orphanage but now it's World War II and kids are disappearing from the Orphanage with the rumour their being evacuated but in reality the strict vindictive nun running the orphanage is selling the kids to flying pirates from Neverland (Their ships fly not them) to work in the mines owned by Captain Blackbeard whose trying to mine Pixum which is crystalised fairy dust. It's never stated this helps the ships fly but it is shown that Pixum is keeping Blackbeard alive by reversing the aging process due to his fear of death. Blackbeard is in conflict with the Natives of Neverland because he wishes to strip mine their land to hunt for more Pixum, having almost exhausted his present mining area. Peter meets a 20 something year old miner called James Hook who after seeing Peter fly when Blackbeard tried to make him walk the plank decides Peter is his way out of the mines and back home teaming up with him to escape. On they way they crash into the jungle and run into the natives who come to believe Peter is a foretold saviour coming to lead the hidden sealed away fairy Kingdom to join the Natives in a revolution against the pirates and Peter himself is the product of the love between a fairy Prince and Mary the love of Blackbeard's life.

Add in some stuff about how Peter's mother became a great warrior fighting Blackbeard's pirates and dies by Blackbeards hand somewhat accidentally as they fought and Tiger Lily having been trained by Peter's mother to be a warrior and James Hook starting to develop feeling for Princess Tiger Lily and well you have a plenty of stuff going on


Thoughts less spoilery:

This is a film that tries to Burtonise™ the world of Peter Pan and Neverland by making it far more darker in ways with killer animals and rather ruthless pirates some of whom early on wear clown make up and ruffs for some reason that's never explained but also lots of colour in the darkness to make the world seem quite fantastical. Where the film falls down is despite it's 8 minute shy of 2 hour runtime it has too many theme's it's trying to juggle such that almost none of them get their proper time or fleshed out enough. There's Blackbeard and his fear of death, the Natives vs Pirates wanting to strip mine Neverland to gain a form of immortality (yes this sounds like some Alex Jones Rant about Billionaire Vampires trying to strip mine Africa to gain immortality using their money). There's Peter and the stuff about believing in yourself etc etc. There's the whole does Peter's destiny really matter or was it ultimately his choice to to become a hero rather than being destined to be one and finally the stuff with James Hook and the idea of home is where you choose to make it etc.

All this is wrapped up round some seriously odd moments where Huge Jackman as Blackbeard if Frilly armour and a wig struts about on almost a stage in the sky while he and his pirate Minions and the miners in the mines all sing Smells like Teen Spirit by Nirvana (no really this is legitimately part of the film).

I will say it's an interesting way to get round the issue of Tiger Lilly and the "Indians" by changing them to be a more generic tribal culture and also making Tiger Lily a female warrior who fights with a double sided axe that can split into twin axes.

Also an interesting thing never explained in the film is when the pirates die they drop dead but the Natives explode into coloured powder when killed and their bodies vanish.

If they'd chosen to focus more on a couple of the themes the film may have really stuck the landing but as is it's a very interesting, weird, imaginative film that feels like it wants to say far more than it seemingly was able to say in the end
 
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Hawki

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I mean there were also the sort of implied sex scenes etc but being a Sony production they didn't go as far
Implied sex scenes? Ooh, the horror.

Yeah, this is more a strike against WoT being like GoT rather than being a similarity. There's a reason why "sexposition" became popularized as a term when GoT started airing, and while it was toned down as the series went on, this is still a setting where sex is casual, and bastards are common.

In contrast, every WoT relationship is presented as healthy and/or tragic, and no physical intimacy is shown on screen. It's a far more 'classical' take on intercourse, where it isn't casual, where it's between the main characters, entirely consensual, and there's tragedy to each case of it.
 

Xprimentyl

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The Only Living Boy In New York: Okay / Great

Thomas, a young man dejected after being rejected by a woman he has a fondness for, meets a new neighbor, W.F., a wise, older man who tries to help Thomas navigate the complexities of his life. Thomas soon discovers that his father is having an affair with another woman. In defense of his mother whom he adores, he confronts this other woman, and things get... complicated.

A weird film. Not in any obnoxious ways, just odd in that it's one of those that exists purely for itself, in a vacuum. Not sure how much of it is meant to be relatable, so I ended up watching more as voyeur than an audience. The "twist" comes off as a bit obscene given what was allowed to happen.

The Adam Project: Really Good / Great

Ryan Reynolds travels back in time to save the love of his life, and ends up encountering his 12-year-old self. He is then hunted by an organization from the future (his present) trying to prevent his tampering in the past.

While it is a Reynolds joint, it is still surprisingly good with some genuinely touching moments. Recommended.
 
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Ezekiel

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The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2009)

Watched the remake about eight years ago but got bored and quit some time after Daniel Craig and the girl with the dragon tattoo started working together. Swedish version is a good mystery movie, but some of the victim's action or inactions just don't pan out and some of the detective work is a bit of a stretch. Didn't like the ending that much. Weird that I've only seen this other Noomi Rapace movie, considering how I liked her in Prometheus. Been so long since I watched David Fincher's version that I thought it was set in America or England, which made me wonder how they adapted the whole Nazi plot and legal guardian thing with the adult Rapace character. But I just found out it's also set in Sweden. Seems a bit pointless. I'm curious. I like Fincher, but haven't decided if I'll give it another chance.
 
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Dwarvenhobble

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The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2009)

Watched the remake about eight years ago but got bored and quit some time after Daniel Craig and the girl with the dragon tattoo started working together. Swedish version is a good mystery movie, but some of the victim's action or inactions just don't pan out and some of the detective work is a bit of a stretch. Didn't like the ending that much. Weird that I've only seen this other Noomi Rapace movie, considering how I liked her in Prometheus. Been so long since I watched David Fincher's version that I thought it was set in America or England, which made me wonder how they adapted the whole Nazi plot and legal guardian thing with the adult Rapace character. But I just found out it's also set in Sweden. Seems a bit pointless. I'm curious. I like Fincher, but haven't decided if I'll give it another chance.
The sort of thing is with this one is it kind of leads into the next one in the trilogy at the end somewhat.
 

Hawki

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Monster Hunter (6/10)

The weird thing about this film is that for about 80% of its runtime, it's actually good. Weird, considering that this is Paul W.S. Anderson, who, at best, tends to make action shlock, yet here, a lot of the film is remarkably self-cosntrained. Once again, Milla Jovovich is playing a character in a desert fighting monsters, but how the film is shot and paced is in stark contrast to Anderson's RE films. Disclaimer that I've never played the Monster Hunter games, nor know anything about their lore, so for the most part, this is treating the film entirely on its own merits rather than its status as an adaptation.

So, anyway, a bunch of US Rangers operating in what I assume is the Middle East (longitude and latitude are given, but no actual location) are engulfed by a storm that sends them into a different world. Earthlike in a lot of respects (sand, blue sky, etc.) but clearly not the location they were once in. Driving across the desert sands in their vehicles, they're attacked by a creature called a dialos that's immune to everything, can dive under the sand, and kills/injures a number of them. Taking shelter amongst rocks, they're attacked by spider-like monsters, who kill/coccoon the rest, so by the time Jovovich's character escapes from their underground nest, she's the only ranger left alive. Meanwhile, someone is aiding them from afar, shooting explosive arrows and the like, but he remains an enigma at this point.

Commenting up to this point, the film's paced very well. There's action, sure, but it's a very slow burn, from getting sucked into this world, to exploring it, to being attacked, and so on. Furthermore, what I really like about the movie's first 80% is how the film conveys a sense of "alienness, but not too much" while subtletly conveying how this ecosystem works. While it doesn't have a monopoly on this concept, I found myself reminded of the game 'Another World', in that it has a similar premise (lightning storm sucks in protagonist to alien world), and said alien world being...off. As in, the creatures aside, there's nothing in the geography that would feel out of place on Earth, but there's a sense of 'offness' that pervades the environs. Of course, the very first thing we see in the film is a sailing ship literally sailing over sand, but, y'know...

Also, there's the ecosystem. It's never stated, but we can pick things out. That the dialos is death incarnate on the sand, but can't (or won't) go into the rocks. The spiders are lethal, but are extremely vulnerable to sunlight, so during the day, you're safe from them (unless you're in shadow). By extension, our protagonist can see the storm in the distance, and knows she has to get back, but has no way of travelling over the sand without being eaten. I know Jovovich's got a lot of flak over the years, but credit where credit is due, she has to carry the movie by herself for a fair portion of its runtime, and does a decent job. Though I should also point out that her character's name is Natalie Artemis. Gee, subtle...

Anyway, Artemis is captured by "the Hunter" (hence referred to as "Hunter"), and what starts off as an adversarial relationship ends as a friendship. Neither of them can speak the other's language, and both are aggravataed by that fact. I really like how the film handles this - Hunter knows how these creatures operate, and knows that they can't make for the storm while the dialos is alive, so they have to train, plan, and execute that plan, without able to speak each other's language. Again, both actors do a great job of selling this. The language barrier is handled well, so we get to learn about both characters through their actions rather than their words. Okay, sure, lots of works have done this, but still, it's done well. Also, Artemis is decked out in monster hunting gear that's neat. Over-designed, but neat. I assume that these giant swords, bows, and grapple-shots are from the games, but whatever, they're neat.

So, anyway, the dialos is killed, but Hunter is knocked out, so Artemis is forced to drag him across the desert for awhile, before he comes to, and they keep on marching, effectively retracting the steps (or wheels) of the rangers. Again, mostly silent, and mostly atmospheric, and it works. Unfortunately, however, it's what happens after this that causes the film to lose its steam. Because it's at this point that the pair reunite with Hunter's ship crew, and the admiral (played by Ron Pearlman, because...reasons), happens to speak English. Turns out Artemis isn't the first person from Earth to this world, and he learnt their language from these prior travellers.
 

Hawki

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Um...okay, first of all, there's 6000 languages spoken on Earth, that it happens to be English-speaking travellers is a bit of a coincidence. But more importantly, this represents an unwelcome shift in the movie, as we're given exposition. Up until now, the movie's let plot and context slowly unfold, whereas here, the admiral just lays things out. "The Ancients" (ugh) built a tower that creates portals between worlds (a dark tower, amirite?), and they're gone, but left behind a dragon creature, so they've got to stop the tower, because as long as the portal remains open, beasties will threaten Earth, and Earth threatens this world because...I dunno, humans are bastards I guess? There's one bright spot as we get a chef cat who meows a lot, but it's from this point that the movie shifts from good to average. Because even if you drop all this aside, the direction and acting from this point just feels lethargic. Like they ran out of time, interest, money, or some combination. Because they approach the tower, the dragon attacks, and Artemis is knocked through the portal back into our world, only for the dragon to follow, which promptly incinerates everything from tanks, to VTOLs, to an AWACs.

I'm going to use this moment to interject into this film's status as an adaptation. I may not know much about Monster Hunter, but I do know (or I'm pretty sure I know) that it doesn't involve any real-world military, or crossover from our world. The crossover itself is fine, if only for how the movie relates its story organically, but why is the military here? Did they get funding from the US military for their presence? If so, they're completely wasted. Is it because Anderson thought the story would be more interesting? If so, it isn't. Did he think we'd like the action scene? If so, it's not particuarly engaging. The 'monster hunting' we see in the film is more interesting than this imitation of 'Reign of Fire.'

Anyway, the dragon is killed, with help from Hunter and Pearlman, and they re-enter the monster world to fight a second dragon and the film ends.

Wait, what?

Yeah, the ending is abrupt. It's not conclusive, nor is it a proper cliffhanger, it just...stops. Again, did they run out of time or something, because that's the most convincing explanation I can think of. Least we get pirate cat in the credits.

So, yeah. This movie is a weird one. 80% of its runtime, it's solid, but the last 20% just drags it down. It does get a spot in my top 10 VG movies, but that's kind of sad, really. Wouldn't mind a sequel though, and TBH, I think this is one of Anderson's better movies. Not a GOOD movie by any means, but has some solid competencies.
 

Breakdown

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PAN
(Prime Video)

Rating: Imaginative and an original take that certainly flys but very much fails to quite stick the landing

Basic premise: A prequel to Peter Pan telling the tales of various characters in Peter Pan end up in Neverland and their interactions beforehand .

More spoiler containing synopsis Peter is left at an Orphanage as a baby by his mother. Years later he's a child in the same orphanage but now it's World War II and kids are disappearing from the Orphanage with the rumour their being evacuated but in reality the strict vindictive nun running the orphanage is selling the kids to flying pirates from Neverland (Their ships fly not them) to work in the mines owned by Captain Blackbeard whose trying to mine Pixum which is crystalised fairy dust. It's never stated this helps the ships fly but it is shown that Pixum is keeping Blackbeard alive by reversing the aging process due to his fear of death. Blackbeard is in conflict with the Natives of Neverland because he wishes to strip mine their land to hunt for more Pixum, having almost exhausted his present mining area. Peter meets a 20 something year old miner called James Hook who after seeing Peter fly when Blackbeard tried to make him walk the plank decides Peter is his way out of the mines and back home teaming up with him to escape. On they way they crash into the jungle and run into the natives who come to believe Peter is a foretold saviour coming to lead the hidden sealed away fairy Kingdom to join the Natives in a revolution against the pirates and Peter himself is the product of the love between a fairy Prince and Mary the love of Blackbeard's life.

Add in some stuff about how Peter's mother became a great warrior fighting Blackbeard's pirates and dies by Blackbeards hand somewhat accidentally as they fought and Tiger Lily having been trained by Peter's mother to be a warrior and James Hook starting to develop feeling for Princess Tiger Lily and well you have a plenty of stuff going on


Thoughts less spoilery:

This is a film that tries to Burtonise™ the world of Peter Pan and Neverland by making it far more darker in ways with killer animals and rather ruthless pirates some of whom early on wear clown make up and ruffs for some reason that's never explained but also lots of colour in the darkness to make the world seem quite fantastical. Where the film falls down is despite it's 8 minute shy of 2 hour runtime it has too many theme's it's trying to juggle such that almost none of them get their proper time or fleshed out enough. There's Blackbeard and his fear of death, the Natives vs Pirates wanting to strip mine Neverland to gain a form of immortality (yes this sounds like some Alex Jones Rant about Billionaire Vampires trying to strip mine Africa to gain immortality using their money). There's Peter and the stuff about believing in yourself etc etc. There's the whole does Peter's destiny really matter or was it ultimately his choice to to become a hero rather than being destined to be one and finally the stuff with James Hook and the idea of home is where you choose to make it etc.

All this is wrapped up round some seriously odd moments where Huge Jackman as Blackbeard if Frilly armour and a wig struts about on almost a stage in the sky while he and his pirate Minions and the miners in the mines all sing Smells like Teen Spirit by Nirvana (no really this is legitimately part of the film).

I will say it's an interesting way to get round the issue of Tiger Lilly and the "Indians" by changing them to be a more generic tribal culture and also making Tiger Lily a female warrior who fights with a double sided axe that can split into twin axes.

Also an interesting thing never explained in the film is when the pirates die they drop dead but the Natives explode into coloured powder when killed and their bodies vanish.

If they'd chosen to focus more on a couple of the themes the film may have really stuck the landing but as is it's a very interesting, weird, imaginative film that feels like it wants to say far more than it seemingly was able to say in the end
I thought it was really strange the way they changed Hook so he was a Han Solo, scoundrel with a heart of gold kind of character. I just couldn't believe that this character would go on to become the evil Captain Hook.
 
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