Recent content by El Portero

  1. El Portero

    Bethesda Isn't Working on Elder Scrolls 6 "At the Moment"

    I think what this means is TES6 is currently being worked on by a skeleton crew headed by Todd Howard (who is presumably there to make early creative decisions). The project won't get the whole studio working on it until they're ready to begin mass producing assets and writing quests.
  2. El Portero


    It's gonna be Ana Amari AKA Sombra AKA Pharah's mom.
  3. El Portero

    Judging By The Cover: Judging Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

    Holy cow. I thought the U.S. cover was ill-conceived. Now I know it was actually an improvement. How do you look at the U.K. cover and not immediately think, he's about to get gibbed by a train.
  4. El Portero

    Game of Thrones Is Still TV's Most Pirated Series

    *Overproduced news corp graphics and sound bite* This just in! The status quo has not changed. We now return to your regularly scheduled programming.
  5. El Portero

    Four New Mortal Kombat X Characters Leaked Early

    I think I'm the only person in the world who loves everything about Bo Rai Cho. So glad they're bringing him back. Can't wait to burn Leatherface to death with my flatulence.
  6. El Portero

    Fallout 4 Pre-Loading Confirmed for All Platforms

    In other news, digital copies of Fallout 4 were confirmed to have graphics settings, keyboard support, and a desktop icon.
  7. El Portero

    Here's The Official Star Wars: The Force Awakens Theatrical Poster

    Remember when trailers didn't need trailers? Me neither.
  8. El Portero

    Who Should Be In a GTA V Movie?

    Frankly, Steve Buscemi should play every role -- for everything.
  9. El Portero

    Watch: New Super Mario Maker Trailer Invokes Nostalgia

    Nintendo: "Hey! Remember when these Mario titles were a thing? Me: "Why yes, I do remember Mario. It's really hard to be nostalgic for a franchise you never stopped making games for.
  10. El Portero

    New Overwatch Hero Is a Response to Body-Type Diversity Criticism

    Meanwhile, Overkill is adding an obese chain smoking trailer trash character to Payday 2. Great body diversity there, Blizzard. But seriously, I like Zarya's design.
  11. El Portero

    Phrases that piss you off

    This one is used ad nauseam in American politics, "Jamming it down our throats." Not only does it conjure disturbing imagery, but it's always applied hyperbolically and only serves to regress the dialogue. Also, can everyone agree to stop saying literally? You don't know how it's used so...
  12. El Portero

    Escapist News Now: Family Guy: The Quest For Stuff Launches

    I think Andrea's necklace is trying to tell me something. In all seriousness, these games are boring as hell, even without pay-to-win mechanics.
  13. El Portero

    LoadingReadyRun: The New Chess

    Methinks this joke is as old as dirt, but still funny. Reminds me of a comic I have cut out and tacked to my cork board.
  14. El Portero

    Feed Dump: Klingon Hard Rock Heartache

    I have to give props for the Clone High reference.
  15. El Portero

    Escapist News Now: SteamOS Announced

    My prediction: Wednesday they announce the steambox. [0 ] Friday they announce the new source engine and possibly hl3. 0+0