Recent content by Esmoreit

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    If You Were A Game Character...

    Kratos. Deadly, lots of threesomes.
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    My teacher quit

    So many awesome teachers quit way too soon. To Mrs. Fijma, who went got a position in the bahamas. Perhaps I'm too jealous to give her praise now though... To Mr. de Bruin, who actually helped me pass science back in high school. To Mr Jansen, for making business law interesting though...
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    10% is not enough! Recruit! Recruit! Recruit!

    Funny enough, just today the newspaper reported that the last feminist magazine in the Netherlands had to accept male-sollicitors for the position of editor in chief if he was the best candidate. Also, Saskwach, thanks for the advise. I'll gladly take it over, then, when they lost me...
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    Zero Punctuation: Condemned 2: Bloodshot

    "Hit me with you're rythm stick" made me laugh the most, in that context...
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    Problems and Solutions

    I actually though about this for some time and I came up with the perfect, non-violent solution. Poop. No seriously. Let all attendees of the funeral take a dump in some buckets. Then proceed to empty said buckets over protestors. It is non-violent and the protestors will probably not be able...
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    10% is not enough! Recruit! Recruit! Recruit!

    I see myself as somewhat of a rude dickhead and will go out of my way to annoy "feminazi's" - merely for my own pleasure without meaning it, mind you. Luckily for me, two of my friends got into relationships with two girls... sisters of eachother and both highly emancipated. I try to aggitate...
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    Poll: what sex are you?

    I am Awesome Sex!
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    The Hilton Curse

    After she has found her new BFF, hopefully thy'll put her on a USO to Iraq. "In this all new episode of "the simple life" with her new BFF, PAris will find out life on the front isn't allt hat's cracked up to be. After basic training and latrine duty, watch her be used as sniper lure on the...
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    The next dominant genre in gaming.

    I think that the next big genre to topple is MMO's. You can already see it happpening. WoW has over 2/3d of the market share I believe, and the rest is scrambling for crumbs. I heard that they already pulled the plug out of Tabula Rasa... I think the genre after that will be the strategy...
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    Zero Punctuation: Zack & Wiki: Quest for Barbaros' Treasure

    Zack and wiki is definitly not obscure. This game was considered 2007's "No one buys it despite all reviewers screaming on the soapbox to go get it". Kinda like Okami and psychonauts. Great review, and I'll pick this one up once my internship is over and I get some decent pay.
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    Zero Punctuation: Turok

    This review left me with some remarks and questions, some more serious then others though: Am I correct that Goldeneye was the first FPS where we had a camera going into the protagonist (Bonds) head? What was up with that "respond to De-Rez"? From what I gathered someone must have made...
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    The most 'No fair!' moment in a video game?

    Smash bros melee, playing the 15 min. man melee with donkey kong, bitchslapping the ground untill my thumbs get sore. With only two minutes on the clock and a life's percentage of 2 minutes, a bob-omb spawns right in front of my clapping.
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    Zero Punctuation: Sim City Societies

    Awww what a emotional rush. First I'm laughing at the "She reminds me of an otter chewing an electric fans" - then get saddened by the poor heavy...
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    When was the last time you cried and/or teared up during a video game?

    I too usually get the proverbial lump. Teary, not so much (it does happen though.. a week ago I rewatched Band of Brothers and the work camp scene in "Why we fight"... damn.) But that lump... I've felt it at several Games. Episode 2 has been mentioned reightfully, I remember the Starfox 64...
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    Zero Punctuation: Silent Hill Origins

    I was wondering, wouldn't it be wise to transfer you're Darkness and Fable reviews over to the escapist? They are still floating around somewhere on youtube but I doubt a lot of visitors here have seen them.