Oh hey, MovieBob got fired (Or let go)

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Houseman

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I've personally never had that impulse
I used to be a huge troll, but then I grew out of it. with my teenage years.

Maybe that's part of the problem, too many immature young'ns. Children can be so cruel.
And the other part of the problem are people with genuine personality disorders. who either don't know or don't care how they're hurting others.
 

happyninja42

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I used to be a huge troll, but then I grew out of it. with my teenage years.

Maybe that's part of the problem, too many immature young'ns. Children can be so cruel.
And the other part of the problem are people with genuine personality disorders. who either don't know or don't care how they're hurting others.
I would definitely say, for myself at least, that I was worse in my teens/20s. Lots of emotional issues and a shitty homelife compounded with my own insecurities, plus the regular teen angst and growing up. I can't say I actively went out of my way to hurt people, as I've never enjoyed doing that, given when it was directed at me. But I definitely hurt others by indifference and ignorance. Just, not being personally aware of how my behavior would be perceived by others.

But it's hardly limited to youth sadly. Plenty of adults continue to behave in that way.
 

Worgen

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Well it's a form of anonymous communication that lets you spout whatever you want without any real tangible ramifications. So that alone tends to encourage people to say things they wouldn't often say IRL. There is apparently just a significant portion of humanity, who take pleasure in saying terrible things in a public forum, regardless of context or reason, other than that endorphin rush they feel I guess.

I've personally never had that impulse, though I would be lying if I said I've NEVER posted a heated rant/vent for no reason other than I wanted to get it out there. And I've had a number of heated exchanges with people, on these forums, and things like YT comments, because it was just, a bad day, a subject I am passionate about that someone is horribly misrepresenting, etc. But, I've lost count of the number of times I've typed something out and before I hit enter just went "....nah, but, why though? Seriously what do I hope to accomplish with this post? It's just going to piss me off further, when they don't get it, and I know they won't get it. So....yeah nah" *delete*

Because I do think that we should self-monitor our online lives and behavior a lot more, and that it would make things a bit better in the world. We like to think our online personas don't have an impact, but, they really do. While I can't prove it, I firmly believe that I actually witnessed an online chat, that lead to someone committing suicide.
I'll be spare on the details, but it was an online chat site to play roleplaying games online, and we were just in the lobby chatting. There was one guy, who was known to have some emotional stability/depression issues going on. While he wasn't a complete asshole, he was fairly abrasive at times in the chat, but hardly the worst example on the site. Well, he was talking about how he was having some issues lately, but that he was glad to have the chat community, as he enjoyed his time with them. And someone else made a comment, and I'm paraphrasing. "lulz, you are kidding right? You're one of the more toxic people we have here! Half of what you say is hurtful and rude." Now this was ironic to me, as the person posting it, was probably the most passive aggressive shitbag on the site, in my opinion anyway. The guy she insulted didn't post anything else, we saw a notification of him logging off maybe....2 minutes later? And another friend of his came on the next day, to report he'd committed suicide that night. Now, again, this is pure speculation, but even before I knew he killed himself, it definitely seemed to me, that the other person's post, bothered him enough, to make him log off, I assumed to cool down or whatever.

So, yeah, stop being internet shitbags people. Be excellent to each other. Cliché words from a cheezy movie, but they are more true the older I get. The way you interact with people, directly, or after the fact in the form of your internet history, that sticks around after you've move onto something else, has an impact. Like a turd on the sidewalk, that you step on without noticing.

Just, be kind. It's really not that hard. Sure you won't always accomplish it, I sure as hell have my days, but make an EFFORT to reduce your shitstains on humanity. Then, shock of shocks, maybe everything won't be so shitty anymore.
I think its a combination of anonymous communication but also the idea that its expected. Like people being toxic online could have been nipped in the bud rather early if people had took an early stand against it but once the idea of the internet being a place where you should expect toxicity took hold, more and more people did it because they thought it was the culture.

I agree that we should self monitor and it can be hard when you are arguing with words on a page. We miss a lot of communication through just text and its that much easier to not see that you are arguing with someone else and thus easy to get irrationally angry. Escapist does a pretty decent job of forcing you to mitigate your words since you can't just call someone 'stupid'.
 

SilentPony

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Why on earth are you commenting in this forum? This is also a kind of social media.

Anyway: I do read YouTube and Twitter comments. The latter I probably shouldn't since that is a platform whose format encourages zingers more than dialogue and understanding. The former... I might be looking at the wrong videos but I don't really encounter the supposed cesspits of comment sections youtube is infamous for. And sometimes other comment-writers manages to point out something I might have missed in the video.
Not really? These are private forums with very strict rules and active moderators. And everyone is using a fake name, and its very hard to view the forum without being a member.
That's kinda different than social media.
 

Houseman

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I grew up being told that you shouldn't post anything on the internet you wouldn't be comfortable with your employer seeing.
When I was growing up, I didn't have internet, nor did I have an employer, so yeah, I definitely lost out on that bit of advice. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
 

happyninja42

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I grew up being told that you shouldn't post anything on the internet you wouldn't be comfortable with your employer seeing. It seems along the way that bit of advice has been lost. Lol.
The internet didn't become a regular thing until I was well into highschool, so it mostly just boiled down to the classic "Don't be a dick." Regardless of medium.
 
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Nick Calandra

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The internet didn't become a regular thing until I was well into highschool, so it mostly just boiled down to the classic "Don't be a dick." Regardless of medium.
Yea, I was generalizing. I was born in 95 lol and my parents were helicopter parents always reminding me to never put private information online...little did they know what was coming with the launch of Myspace and AIM LOL.
 

happyninja42

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Yea, I was generalizing. I was born in 95 lol and my parents were helicopter parents always reminding me to never put private information online...little did they know what was coming with the launch of Myspace and AIM LOL.
Yeah you were born when I graduated highschool. It's really funny how age creeps up on you. I mean, that line from Good Will Hunting, that Ben Afleck says about "I'm going to wake up tomorrow and be 50, and still doing this shit." Is incredibly accurate. I'm 44 and I really can't say where the time went. There isn't really any memory of it, not a tangible tracking really. I remember first noticing it at work, when I would be sitting at my desk, doing the applications for kids going to college, who were born when I graduated highschool. And I'm looking at them and thinking..."fuck, that was 19 years ago....I'm officially an old dude by kid standards." You never really feel like an "adult" though. I mean I feel my age, in the context of pain and injuries. But, i still feel like I did on most things, like I did when I was 30.

Age is a strange thing.
 

Bedinsis

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Not really? These are private forums with very strict rules and active moderators. And everyone is using a fake name, and its very hard to view the forum without being a member.
That's kinda different than social media.
Yes, really. Or what do you mean with social media?

I am not sure what you mean when you say that it is "very hard" to view the forum without being a member. I tried using the web browser I am not logged on on this site in, there was no problem in visiting the forums.
 

Nick Calandra

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Yeah you were born when I graduated highschool. It's really funny how age creeps up on you. I mean, that line from Good Will Hunting, that Ben Afleck says about "I'm going to wake up tomorrow and be 50, and still doing this shit." Is incredibly accurate. I'm 44 and I really can't say where the time went. There isn't really any memory of it, not a tangible tracking really. I remember first noticing it at work, when I would be sitting at my desk, doing the applications for kids going to college, who were born when I graduated highschool. And I'm looking at them and thinking..."fuck, that was 19 years ago....I'm officially an old dude by kid standards." You never really feel like an "adult" though. I mean I feel my age, in the context of pain and injuries. But, i still feel like I did on most things, like I did when I was 30.

Age is a strange thing.
Heh, I feel like now that I'm past 25 there's no more years to be excited about. Because 25 is when your car insurance goes down...and it was not as glorious as it sounded.
 

happyninja42

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Heh, I feel like now that I'm past 25 there's no more years to be excited about. Because 25 is when your car insurance goes down...and it was not as glorious as it sounded.
Yeah, I think a lot of it is when you get into the routine of "job", the time just sort of bleeds into itself. You don't have things like summer breaks to give you periods of variety and change.
 

Nick Calandra

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Yeah, I think a lot of it is when you get into the routine of "job", the time just sort of bleeds into itself. You don't have things like summer breaks to give you periods of variety and change.
I'm in games coverage. What the fuck is a break? Lol
 

happyninja42

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I'm in games coverage. What the fuck is a break? Lol
Exactly my point. You don't really have those once you are in the job world. So one week is the same as last week, is the same as last year, is the same as a decade ago. That's when you blink and go "shit...it's been a decade? what have I been doing?" Answer: the exact same thing, day in and out.
 

Dalisclock

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Serious question: Who here actually reads YouTube, Twitter and Facebook comments? You know its be proven doing that increases your risk for depression and anxiety, right? And I don't mean that snarkily, I mean interacting with people on Social Media is considered a health hazard. Why do you do it? What do you hope to learn or achieve? Even if its something like MovieBob getting canned and some people gloating and other moaning, what you get from interacting with them?
I'll occasionally read youtube comments for videos that aren't about political topics. Sometimes the comments are great. Sometimes it's a toxic garbage fire and that's when it's a good time to stop.

I curate my facebook so that's not a problem for me. If I don't know them, I don't friend them. All my posts are friends only. All my info is private or friends only. Occasionally I've unfriended people if I feel I can no longer have a civil conversation with them or they've crossed a line. Since my FB is really just so I can keep tabs on my friends, this is ideal.

Twitter....I just don't go there.
 
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Dalisclock

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I'm in games coverage. What the fuck is a break? Lol
I'm assuming the coffee eventually stops working and you pass out. :)

No, seriously, I can see how it's neverending and personally think you've done an admirable job with this place. Especially after years of the great Defy neglect when a lot of us were just waiting for the lights to go out and wondering when it would happen.
 

CM156

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I grew up being told that you shouldn't post anything on the internet you wouldn't be comfortable with your employer seeing
That's why the good Lord invented VPNs
 

happyninja42

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I'll occasionally read youtube comments for videos that aren't about political topics. Sometimes the comments are great. Sometimes it's a toxic garbage fire and that's when it's a good time to stop.
Yeah it depends on the content for me too. Most of the people on YT I'm subscribed to, don't really generate a lot of controversy, so it's pretty easy to just stay on point, meaning the actual topic of the video. They're gaming related providers, so it will be comments about their playstyle, choice of gear/abilities, etc. Harmless stuff.

The content that I subscribe to that is contentious, like various atheist related content providers, I rarely check their comment section, as it's usually the same stuff, and quickly devolves into a shitshow.
I curate my facebook so that's not a problem for me. If I don't know them, I don't friend them. All my posts are friends only. All my info is private or friends only. Occasionally I've unfriended people if I feel I can no longer have a civil conversation with them or they've crossed a line. Since my FB is really just so I can keep tabs on my friends, this is ideal.

Twitter....I just don't go there.
I haven't used FB in probably over a decade? And I've never bothered with Twitter at all. I'm tempted to create a profile, as there are a few authors that I'd like to talk to about advice on my own writing, as far as getting published, and their main method is through Twitter. But, I'm still writing the novel, so no point really doing it now. I have to first motivate myself to stop procrastinating and finish the damn book first.
 

tstorm823

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I dunno man, nearly every comment section I look at only takes a few upvoted posts before it devolves into people being extremely toxic and rude. Looks the same to me
Right, but it's entirely possible we're just watching totally different things. It used to be that my friends and I would joke that the only video on youtube without hateful comments was the video for The Room's theme music. Now there are plenty of things to watch that totally avoid responses like that.
 
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