Derp Dog

[The Wooster]

Derp Dog

Every goddamn time.

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[Teoes]

Quick! Update the blurb!

(As someone who is not playing MGSV, unfortunately I'm missing out on the joke.)

 

[09philj]

Derp Dog

Every goddamn time.

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You still have the text from the Mitchell and Webb homage underneath...

 

[Elementary - Dear Watson]

I don't remember that Mitchell and Webb sketch?

I reckon I need to play the game to appreciate this one fully! I CAN'T WAIT TO PICK IT UP WHEN I GET HOME!!!!!!

 

[Areloch]

I think it's about DD sometimes putting himself in...less than opportune locations when you want to do something dangerous.

More or less an extension of the age-old issue where you go to attack and a friendly walks into it and suddenly it's your fault.

I haven't had any issues like that with DD, but I've been playing my first run-through 'non nuclear', so I haven't really utilized much heavy ordinance.

 

[Something Amyss]

I don't remember that Bowie lyrics.

 

[FPLOON]

You should have gave D-Dog some gems... then whine about all the work you have to do to even get those gems...

That should break the bond in no time!

 

[Darth_Payn]

Sooooooooo, bad Dog? That should teach him C4 is not a chew toy.

I don't remember that Bowie lyrics.

Because they're named the Diamond Dogs, they should rename their base Suffragette City, and have a guy codenamed Major Tom? Actually, that's pretty cool. Let's do that.

I love how nice & friendly Big Boss is towards his dog DD ... but can totally choke, slam down, and beat his crew up to a bloody pulp for no apparent reason. Like literally, you can treat them as if they were real enemies (except they don't fight back and you cannot kill your own people) but everything else is tolerated.

I'm quite conflicted about this XD.

Think of it as an indication about the deteriorating mental state of Big Boss and the rest of the men of MSF/Diamond Dogs/FOXHOUND/whatever they call themselves this week.

 

[Mike000]

I love how nice & friendly Big Boss is towards his dog DD ... but can totally choke, slam down, and beat his crew up to a bloody pulp for no apparent reason. Like literally, you can treat them as if they were real enemies (except they don't fight back and you cannot kill your own people) but everything else is tolerated.

I'm quite conflicted about this XD.

Well your private kidnapped & brainwashed masochistic army* does often ask for you to "train" them.
And thank you when you kick them back into consciousness.
If you question them, they helpfully mark your map with the location of the diamonds they've been embezzling.

*seriously...how does this get a pass? Everybody's in a snit over Quiet's stupid outfit, which is probably the least of the skeevy things in this game.

 

[Something Amyss]

Sooooooooo, bad Dog? That should teach him C4 is not a chew toy.

[citation needed]

Because they're named the Diamond Dogs, they should rename their base Suffragette City, and have a guy codenamed Major Tom? Actually, that's pretty cool. Let's do that.

I was more making a joke about the title, which relates to the actions of the dog in-game, but that actually does sound cool. Can we work in a Goblin King reference somewhere?

I love how nice & friendly Big Boss is towards his dog DD ... but can totally choke, slam down, and beat his crew up to a bloody pulp for no apparent reason. Like literally, you can treat them as if they were real enemies (except they don't fight back and you cannot kill your own people) but everything else is tolerated.

I'm quite conflicted about this XD.

This seems pretty true to how we perceive things. Games in dogs are often there for emotional manipulation. Like 95%[footnote]completely fabricated number for illustrative purposes[/footnote] of them die in a tragic moment because we as the player can mow down 30,000 people before breakfast, but if Fluffy gets it, we get something in our eye.

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

Games in dogs

Outside of a dog, a game is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too cramped to play.

 

[Naturally Sound]

Quiet, cease cover fire! NO DON'T SHOOT THE ARMORED VEHICLE WITH A TRANQ RIFLE - RUN!!

Miller: Don't leave her to die!

Quiet, snipe that target!

Quiet: *jumps to a new location after having a laser sight on target*

On-topic: I can easily tell that something does happen to the dog the moment the trailer revealed him, especially in a series that loves killing off characters that are no longer plot-relevant.

*seriously...how does this get a pass? Everybody's in a snit over Quiet's stupid outfit, which is probably the least of the skeevy things in this game.

Eh, I think the controversy added kindle to the already-burning fire when the game tries to explain why she dresses like that...but fails to explain the various cat posing when she is in the chopper or in her cell.

Kojima, goddammit, stop it - you're not fooling many.

 

[Something Amyss]

Games in dogs

Outside of a dog, a game is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too cramped to play.

Groucho Marx was a man before his time.

 

[Godhead]

I love how nice & friendly Big Boss is towards his dog DD ... but can totally choke, slam down, and beat his crew up to a bloody pulp for no apparent reason. Like literally, you can treat them as if they were real enemies (except they don't fight back and you cannot kill your own people) but everything else is tolerated.

I'm quite conflicted about this XD.

Because DD is a good boy, yes he is.

 

[Neurotic Void Melody]

I only just found DDdog as a pup..aww. Not enough time recently to play more. I was honestly hoping to train up a battilion of war-sheep for deployment, but it is not looking likely to happen. :/

 

[Canadamus Prime]

I'm sure I would get this if I'd actually played MGSV

 

[Erttheking]

I'm guessing the D-Dog's A.I. leaves much to be desired?

 

[Rad Party God]

I love how nice & friendly Big Boss is towards his dog DD ... but can totally choke, slam down, and beat his crew up to a bloody pulp for no apparent reason. Like literally, you can treat them as if they were real enemies (except they don't fight back and you cannot kill your own people) but everything else is tolerated.

I'm quite conflicted about this XD.

How can anyone not love this cute little face. LOOK AT IT!!!

 

[GrumbleGrump]

Quiet, cease cover fire! NO DON'T SHOOT THE ARMORED VEHICLE WITH A TRANQ RIFLE - RUN!!

Miller: Don't leave her to die!

Quiet, snipe that target!

Quiet: *jumps to a new location after having a laser sight on target*

Something tells me I should stick with D-Horse...

Well your private kidnapped & brainwashed masochistic army* does often ask for you to "train" them.
And thank you when you kick them back into consciousness.
If you question them, they helpfully mark your map with the location of the diamonds they've been embezzling.

*seriously...how does this get a pass? Everybody's in a snit over Quiet's stupid outfit, which is probably the least of the skeevy things in this game.

NAW MAN BIG BOSS SO COOL HE DONT NEED NO SPEAKIN TO HIS SOLDIERS

 

[icanhasconscience]

Just a reminder, in case you forgot for the sake of the joke...

"derp" is an ableist term making fun of mentally disabled people.

insert feral rage about goddamn SJWs ruining all your fun here.

sincerely,
your conscience.