Australia Finds Its Funbags

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
45,698
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Australia Finds Its Funbags


Remember that great huge load of fake snoobs that went missing [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/87799-Shipment-of-Stonking-Great-Tits-Goes-Missing] somewhere in Australia a couple weeks ago? They've turned up!

130,000 pairs of the pretend knockers, with a street value of $200,000, went missing in early December. The artificial titties were intended to be part of a promotional giveaway in January by Ralph [http://ralph.ninemsn.com.au/] magazine (very NSFW link), a sophisticated journal of current affairs and other matters of relevance to today's modern Australian man.

Fortunately for the magazine, and for wearers of blow-up bazoombas across the whole of the country, the missing melons have been found. In a bit of a letdown for conspiracy fans, however, it turns out that there was nothing more underhanded to the matter than a simple case of mislabeled shipping: A spokesman for the magazine said officials in China lost the paperwork for inflatable milk jugs and ended up putting them on the wrong ship. As a result, instead of arriving at Sydney as they were supposed to, they wound up at a dock in Melbourne, where they've been sitting for the past week.

Santi Pintado, editor at Ralph, said the incident had added another $30,000 to the promotional palookas price tag, but seemed happy that they'd at least been found. "If we'd found them a day later, it'd have been too late to get them on the next issue," he said. "You'd think the Chinese economy was in enough trouble without misplacing 130,000 pairs of boobs." The magazine is now hard at work getting the toy wopbopaloobops into bags so they can be shipped with the December 15 issue.

Congratulations on finding your blow-up splazoingas, Australia. Too bad you're still not getting F.E.A.R. 2 [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/87694-F-E-A-R-2-Banned-In-Australia].


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PedroSteckecilo

Mexican Fugitive
Feb 7, 2008
6,732
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I would also say that too bad your country seems to be run by fun hating facists. Soon they'll ban beaches for showing too much skin, where will you be then Australia?
 

meatloaf231

Old Man Glenn
Feb 13, 2008
2,248
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Funbags
snoobs
knockers
titties
bazoombas
melons
milk jugs
palookas
boobs
wopbopaloobops
splazoingas

I didn't even know you could use this many different words for "breasts" in one article. This has to be a record or something.

And wopbopaloobops? Seriously is that even a real word?
 

dalek sec

Leader of the Cult of Skaro
Jul 20, 2008
10,237
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I'm confused, why is this exactly news here? I'm not trying to be rude, I'm just confused about it all.
 

Limos

New member
Jun 15, 2008
789
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*sigh* I was still using the "stolen by pirates" explanation. You don't let me have any fun.
 

Nurb

Cynical bastard
Dec 9, 2008
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Australia: The drunk, censor happy ultra conservative Texas of the world. :D
 

goncalobms

New member
Nov 15, 2008
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meatloaf231 said:
Funbags
snoobs
knockers
titties
bazoombas
melons
milk jugs
palookas
boobs
wopbopaloobops
splazoingas

I didn't even know you could use this many different words for "breasts" in one article. This has to be a record or something.

And wopbopaloobops? Seriously is that even a real word?

That was my favorite thing about this article :)
 

xitel

Assume That I Hate You.
Aug 13, 2008
4,618
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The_root_of_all_evil said:
*applauds Malagrys's numerous synonyms*

You made the breast of a bad job. ;)
Ow... that physically hurt me man. But yeah, I'm thinking it was more fun to theorize why someone would have waylaid a shipment of fake "wopbopaloobops".
 

rougeknife

New member
Jan 2, 2008
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Graustein said:
rougeknife said:
Not News Worthy on a gaming site TBH.
Who says this site is limited to just game-related news?
There is interesting non-gaming related news, and then there is this. I'm not denying that its funny, but I expect to see this kind of fluff on sites like news.au, not The Escapist.

Still, was amusing seeing how many puns he could fit in.
 

Dommyboy

New member
Jul 20, 2008
2,439
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rougeknife said:
Not News Worthy on a gaming site TBH.
Well The Escapist does cover real world news quite a bit more now. I like it because it adds variety and it keeps me up to date with the worlds most important issues like how people get in fights at Chuck E. Cheese or this boobtacular episode.

I am so gonna get a copy of that issue of Ralph.
 

stompy

New member
Jan 21, 2008
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PedroSteckecilo said:
I would also say that too bad your country seems to be run by fun hating fascists. Soon they'll ban beaches for showing too much skin, where will you be then Australia?
You're wrong. They are hypocritical fascists... I mean, they don't mind something like this, but even mention breasts in a video game, and you'll have a MA15+ rating slapped on it.