194: The Lost Years

Jorge Garcia

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Mar 20, 2009
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The Lost Years

A semester-long bout of Quake II multiplayer cost Jorge Garcìa a college degree and his friends' and family's trust. But it also helped him learn how to play games while managing his other responsibilities.

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Dom Camus

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Good to read such a thoughtful, balanced account. Makes a change from crazed ranting either for or against the entire field of gaming.

And congratulations on putting your life back together. Hopefully an inspiration to anyone going through something similar.
 

L.B. Jeffries

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Nov 29, 2007
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Good read. One of the interesting things about addiction is how much it really boils down to a semantics argument. Most addiction groups like AA don't even allow people to use the word. The reason being that the average person in one of these groups isn't there because they think their vice is bad or harmful, quite the contrary. You instead just acknowledge that something is preventing you from having the life you want to have.
 

Clemenstation

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Way to front-load your story with the caveat that games are not causally responsible for your experience. Taking personal responsibility for choices made is something that people rarely do these days, especially when it's so much easier on the ego to blame an entire medium, or a company for selling you things, or society in general.
 
Nov 5, 2007
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Clemenstation said:
Taking personal responsibility for choices made is something that people rarely do these days, especially when it's so much easier on the ego to blame an entire medium, or a company for selling you things, or society in general.
True but you know that when stories of gaming addictions come up, you get a bunch of gamers (let's say, some of the escapist readers) blindly come in and yell "games are not addictive it's all a government conspiracy" and that attitude isn't helping either. Games can be addicting to some people, let's face the facts already and both side should stop hiding their heads in the sand.
 

Clemenstation

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ShadowKirby said:
Clemenstation said:
Taking personal responsibility for choices made is something that people rarely do these days, especially when it's so much easier on the ego to blame an entire medium, or a company for selling you things, or society in general.
True but you know that when stories of gaming addictions come up, you get a bunch of gamers (let's say, some of the escapist readers) blindly come in and yell "games are not addictive it's all a government conspiracy" and that attitude isn't helping either. Games can be addicting to some people, let's face the facts already and both side should stop hiding their heads in the sand.
For sure, for sure. It's natural to be defensive about an activity you enjoy, particularly when people are suggesting that it's unequivocally harmful and / or a waste of time.

But when you say "Games can be addicting to some people", I think we should really be focusing on "some people" rather than "games"; those dudes could be addicted to any number of substitute activities. Can you really blame an entire medium for the lax self-control of individuals? That's the kind of blame-passing that results in retardedly frivolous lawsuits, where people spill coffee on themselves and then sue the company that sold it to them because they weren't warned it was hot.

Notice that people who talk about 'getting past' video game addiction are usually the ones who realized that their own behaviour needed to change, not the ones who sat around complaining that society was in the wrong for offering them a buffet of indulgences.
 

Sir Drystan

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Oct 9, 2008
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Hi my name is Zackery Keys, I am a WoW addict. I haven't logged on in two days now... -twitch-

As a college student struggling against the siren call of wow (not at this very moment mind you, the servers are down) I understand what you're talking about. I only just realized a few days ago how much it's sapping my initiative and dedication to my work so I'm clamping down on my play time. Great article, thanks for sharing.
 

Playbahnosh

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Dec 12, 2007
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Gawd... For one, it was a good article, but I don't really agree with the wording.

This whole article is choke-full of things like addiction, going cold turkey, irresponsible, wasted life/years, coming off of [substance]...ect. You treat video games like it's cocaine or heroin or something, and I don't like the comparison.

First of, I belong to the same generation and same general setup. 56k->college->broadband->"wow, awesome"->long nights of gaming...etc. But I still don't consider my gaming a life-braking, threatening addiction. Sure, I play my games whenever I can, and it does chip away at my responsibilities a fair bit (I myself flunked out of college once, but that had other reasons involved too). In the sense of devoting very much time to gaming and related activities, I'm an addict. I'm a fucking video game whore, in fact. I can't get enough of the stuff. Still, I built my life around it fair and square. I have a (part-time) job reviewing PC games (and I'm soon gonna start working full-time at network maintenance at the university). I'm majoring in Computer Sciences and learning stuff about games, I'm here at the Escapist reading and socializing with other gamers...etc. Games are an integral part of my life, and I refuse to let go. Why should I? I have a job that I enjoy doing and is also my hobby, unlike 90% of people working today. I have many friends IRL and even more friends I never even saw in real life, still, I'm happy to have them. And yes, I spend most of my free (and not free) time sitting in front of my computer... playing games mostly. Am an addict? Guess so. Am I happy? Hell, yes I am.

I refuse to believe the ancient wisdom, that "life has to suck to have a meaning", that anything remotely fun or entertaining must be inherently bad, addictive, sinful, unhealthy...etc and has to be kept under guard. I refuse to believe that having fun is just a mere illusion because life inherently sucks and we are here to suffer, because that gives life meaning. Bullshit! If it means giving up games and related stuff to have a "normal" life, I don't want normal. I won't go cold turkey because some people consider it laughable, childish, counter-productive and not suited for an adult. Tell ya what: I don't care. I accomplished more in my 24 years of living, than most of these die-hard traditionalists and sceptics (realists) will in their entire life. I defeated a fucking dragon today, right before finishing my college assignment with a friend on MSN, and right after I went back to build my factory complex in X3:TC.

Gaming is a form of life, and NOT AN ADDICTION. Deal with it...
 

thejoshualee

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Mar 12, 2009
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A very good article and I think the hangup some people are having is a knee-jerk reaction to having our favorite pastime called a possible addiction.

The very fact that there is no chemical reason that gaming should be addictive makes some of the comparisons faulty (the reason a heroin addict shouldn't use heroin again has more to do with chemistry than the lure of a lifestyle), however our brain is hardwired to make the body crave experiences that give us a pleasant pay off. If studying gave me the same intrinsic reward that gaming does then I wouldn't also be a near 30 year old about to get a bachelors.

Stephen King's book "Hearts in Atlantis" tells a story about a group of college kids who are in danger of flunking out (and being shipped to Vietnam) over the card game Hearts. I've known people in my (too) long academic career who have flunked out due to basketball, going to Disneyland, gambling, shopping, road tripping, working out, and even video games. In each case the activity itself isn't what is addictive, it's the fact that some people's brains react to a specific positive reinforcement inherent in that activity in a more extreme way.

Yes, video games can become addictive and the phenomenon should be brought up and discussed as a serious issue in the gaming community. Is everyone a potential target for this behavior? No, but those of us who are drawn to the games are more likely to be.

A larger issue of happiness (from addiction) vs. fulfilling life is tougher to see as both terms are completely arbitrary. In reality, no one can take a look at someone Else's life and say that they are unfulfilled or not contributing to society. Also, I'd bet that 99% of the population lacks the perspective to look honestly at their own life and make that same judgment in the present tense. For what it's worth, I take the advice my grandpa gave me after he left a rehabilitation clinic for drug abuse. He said that he loved every aspect of his life as a junkie. The only thing was that the drugs were blocking his view of how much else the world had to offer. That's the ruler I measure my own activities with and I use it for all my activities be it work, school, or play. If any one activity clouds the rest of the wonders in the world, it's time to step back.

(with the admission that I am ruining the end of this post I have to admit that, again, with chemical dependency issues it's not time to step back. It's time to run away and never go back.)
 

Marble Dragon

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Mar 11, 2009
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I really enjoyed this article, if only for the way it made me think. A lot of people seem to just love using the term "game addict" to describe my way of life, and of course, I don't think I'm a game addict. I do know a lot about the popular games out there, and the ones with good and bad reviews, but I don't have to go out and buy every single one. It all boils down to what you would use to describe a gaming addict. Is a gaming addict simply someone who loves gaming? Some would say yes, some would say that it's a stupid idea. Is a gaming addict someone who doesn't do anything besides game all day? Perhaps. But by this very train of thought, you're opening new doors for other arguments. What a person spends all day working out? Is he a working out addict now? No, he's doing it for the health benefits. But what if he isn't even out of shape? Does he just do it for the enjoyment? What I want to know is what makes gaming so special.
 

Cubilone

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Jan 14, 2009
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Playbahnosh said:
Gaming is a form of life, and NOT AN ADDICTION. Deal with it...
You could say that for marijuana users as well. That doesn't mean one cannot get addicted to it in another sense (I won't be discussing the addictive properties of marijuana!)

Games can be very addictive. So I will very much agree with Jorge Garcia's conclusion. The transition is the most important. It can be a way of life (the adult aspect) or just a very, very time-consuming form of entertainment. The latter can lead to addiction. I was never addicted to any particular game for long periods of time, like the writer, but sometimes I get hooked with a game so much I think about it all the time, neglecting all other activities just to play it (recently Victoria, B-K: Nuts & Bolts, Civilization IV). And I'm sure that for some people it's worse than my "case".
 

TheBluesader

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I thought all leading psychology experts refused to say gaming could be classified as an addiction because there was no scientific evidence proving it as such. I thought they all say that gaming "addicts" are always people with deeper, diagnosable social problems who are employing games as a means of escaping reality. And that while they may really get into escaping reality as often as possible, the gaming itself is not "addicting", in that there is no biochemical dependency on doing it.

Of course I guess we can use the word "addiction" to mean anything we regularly compulsively do when we know we probably shouldn't. But that seems a rather wrong definition. If that's the way we're defining it, then I'm addicted to posting on the Escapist forums, I'm addicted to eating microwavable pizzas, and I'm addicted to pointing out flaws in people's arguments and getting way too into showing them how wrong they are.

And I always thought I was just mildly asocial and a procrastinator, looking for any and all excuses to avoid responsibility. Which sounds far worse. But that seems more honest to me.

Of course I haven't had a cigarette in two hours, five minutes and 16.5 seconds, so you'll have to forgive me if a I'm snarky.

*twitch*
 

FistsOfTinsel

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Jun 23, 2008
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Excellent article. I don't bother getting hung up on the word addiction; depending on how you frame it, almost any activity that gives someone pleasure (even perversely, like cutting) can be addictive, or nothing is addictive, other than a very narrow class of drugs that induce withdrawal symptoms. But as anyone who has ever recovered from those drugs can tell you, the physical withdrawal is trivial compared to the psychological draw, and that draw is shared with all of these lesser addictions.

That said, we should be glad that our addiction is gaming. Sure, in its extreme form, it can be life (or at least lifestyle) destroying, but so are all of the other addictions. What it doesn't do is destroy your health (couch potatoism is an easily reversible condition compared to liver damage, lung cancer or AIDS). Despite what people might think, it doesn't destroy your pocketbook either; gaming is pretty affordable compared to most compulsions; alcohol & tobacco have a lower max outlay, but the rest (shopping, gambling, illegal drugs) get pretty pricey pretty fast. And gaming won't land you in jail, or entangled with criminals, like drugs, gambling, etc.

I wouldn't consider myself a full-blown addict, but I teeter on the edge. I started college in 1985, and I spent too much time playing rogue and empire on the schools unix boxen, as well as too much time playing boardgames & card games with the other time wasters. I had to take a year off, so it fell nicely into the "learning experience" category of becoming an adult. But it goes to show that modern, online games aren't a necessary requirement for gaming addiction, they're just a more conspicuous monkey.
 

Ph0t0n1c Ph34r

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That basically happened to me, but not to such an extend, I really let my grades drop the first of my two semesters, so know I;m working my ass off trying to get them back up.
 
Nov 5, 2007
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Clemenstation said:
ShadowKirby said:
Clemenstation said:
Taking personal responsibility for choices made is something that people rarely do these days, especially when it's so much easier on the ego to blame an entire medium, or a company for selling you things, or society in general.
True but you know that when stories of gaming addictions come up, you get a bunch of gamers (let's say, some of the escapist readers) blindly come in and yell "games are not addictive it's all a government conspiracy" and that attitude isn't helping either. Games can be addicting to some people, let's face the facts already and both side should stop hiding their heads in the sand.
For sure, for sure. It's natural to be defensive about an activity you enjoy, particularly when people are suggesting that it's unequivocally harmful and / or a waste of time.

But when you say "Games can be addicting to some people", I think we should really be focusing on "some people" rather than "games"; those dudes could be addicted to any number of substitute activities. Can you really blame an entire medium for the lax self-control of individuals? That's the kind of blame-passing that results in retardedly frivolous lawsuits, where people spill coffee on themselves and then sue the company that sold it to them because they weren't warned it was hot.

Notice that people who talk about 'getting past' video game addiction are usually the ones who realized that their own behaviour needed to change, not the ones who sat around complaining that society was in the wrong for offering them a buffet of indulgences.
No, I totally agree with you. I was more concerned about the attitude of some people that say you absolutely cannot be addicted to gaming.

Playbahnosh said:
Gaming is a form of life, and NOT AN ADDICTION. Deal with it...
I'm pretty sure that someone paying WoW 12 hours a day is not "living gaming" but rather ruining his life with a pretty nasty addiction. Of course, we can argue for days on the medical terms but I think you know what I mean.
 

daldous

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I'm 21, academically disqualified in my 3rd year, and have spent a year gaming obsessively, when not working.
It's good to have hope that I will grow tired of this shit, grow up, take responsibility, and start living like a proper human being.

Until then, screw you and screw everything else. There are no consequences to what I'm doing, and if there are, they can go screw themselves too. And screw people who insist I ought to "plan" my life. I'm perfectly happy NOT planning ANYTHING.

You can't make an addict quit. He has to want to quit himself. And I DON'T want to quit. I'm very happy with where I am.
 

Hyper-space

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ShadowKirby said:
Clemenstation said:
Taking personal responsibility for choices made is something that people rarely do these days, especially when it's so much easier on the ego to blame an entire medium, or a company for selling you things, or society in general.
True but you know that when stories of gaming addictions come up, you get a bunch of gamers (let's say, some of the escapist readers) blindly come in and yell "games are not addictive it's all a government conspiracy"
when have you EVER come across someone who would say something like that?

you haven't
 

Playbahnosh

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ShadowKirby said:
Playbahnosh said:
Gaming is a form of life, and NOT AN ADDICTION. Deal with it...
I'm pretty sure that someone paying WoW 12 hours a day is not "living gaming" but rather ruining his life with a pretty nasty addiction. Of course, we can argue for days on the medical terms but I think you know what I mean.
Fo sure! I know what you mean. But there is a real difference between 'addiction' and 'human idiocy'. I mean, common sense. People playing WoW 26 hours a day are retards, not addicts. They are not playing it because they can't stop playing it no matter what they do, they are not playing it because its a bare necessity to avoid cramps, pain n stuff and they don't enjoy it anymore, they just have to play....no. Did you ever meet or saw a drug addict? I had a friend many years ago who sunk into substance abuse, and it was horrible even from outside. That man got so burnt out that it's indescribable.... horrible...

Now, show me a WoW player, who sells his TV, couch and would even sell his organs just to pay the subscription, who lives off food found in dumpsters and steals stuff just to pay the electric bill and subscription... no, MMOG and game addiction requires a certain lifestyle, a certain level of life... it's not like you are dead broke but keep on WoW-ing, just because you can't 'quit'. Sure, there may be some sorry-ass retards who are so disconnected from reality, that they simply 'need' WoW to survive, but these people are not like this because of games, they all have some underlying cause of their disorder. If there weren't any games around, they would've found other outlets for their obsession...

Methinks...
 
Nov 5, 2007
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Playbahnosh said:
ShadowKirby said:
Playbahnosh said:
Gaming is a form of life, and NOT AN ADDICTION. Deal with it...
I'm pretty sure that someone paying WoW 12 hours a day is not "living gaming" but rather ruining his life with a pretty nasty addiction. Of course, we can argue for days on the medical terms but I think you know what I mean.
Fo sure! I know what you mean. But there is a real difference between 'addiction' and 'human idiocy'. I mean, common sense. People playing WoW 26 hours a day are retards, not addicts. They are not playing it because they can't stop playing it no matter what they do, they are not playing it because its a bare necessity to avoid cramps, pain n stuff and they don't enjoy it anymore, they just have to play....no. Did you ever meet or saw a drug addict? I had a friend many years ago who sunk into substance abuse, and it was horrible even from outside. That man got so burnt out that it's indescribable.... horrible...

Now, show me a WoW player, who sells his TV, couch and would even sell his organs just to pay the subscription, who lives off food found in dumpsters and steals stuff just to pay the electric bill and subscription... no, MMOG and game addiction requires a certain lifestyle, a certain level of life... it's not like you are dead broke but keep on WoW-ing, just because you can't 'quit'. Sure, there may be some sorry-ass retards who are so disconnected from reality, that they simply 'need' WoW to survive, but these people are not like this because of games, they all have some underlying cause of their disorder. If there weren't any games around, they would've found other outlets for their obsession...

Methinks...
I never said (and if I did I was wrong) that gaming "addiction" was the same thing as drug addiction. Drug addiction, or smoking for that matter, is something physical while gaming "addiction" is more like gambling addiction. Now, you call that human idiocy but I'm sure doctors would rather talk about a psychological condition. Addiction may not be the right word but find me a better one and I'll use it.