The Air Force Has a Healing Nanotech Laser

John Funk

U.N. Owen Was Him?
Dec 20, 2005
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The Air Force Has a Healing Nanotech Laser



Screw health kits and healing food, I'm going to shoot you with my healing laser gun.

We gamers are no strangers to odd methods of healing. Max Payne gets riddled with bullets, chugs down a bottle of pills and he's good to go. Eating chicken you found by breaking open a trash can will make you instantly healthy again, instead of giving you food poisoning. And how exactly does wiggling my fingers heal the tank from getting slashed by a dragon twenty times his size?

But what if we could heal people ... by shooting them with a laser gun? It's not Star Trek, it's the United States Air Force - and it's technology that actually works.

As one would expect, the Pentagon has good reason to fund medical research for the sake of keeping soldiers alive in war zones - not to mention the civilian benefits. One of the latest advances in technology, reports Wired [http://www.wired.com/dangerroom/2010/05/air-force-researchers-heal-wounds-with-lasers-and-nanotech/#ixzz0nAu0s8pq], involves a combination of nanotechnology and a special laser beam.

Here's how it works: Instead of closing a cut with now-archaic-seeming needle and thread, a patient's wound is soaked in a special dye and then exposed to green light. The light absorbs and reacts with the dye in such a way that it "catalyzes molecular bonds between the tissue's collagen," creating a watertight seal that prevents inflammation, infection, and speeds up the rate at which the body forms scar tissue.

It isn't completely instant, but it can be healed up in 2-3 minutes (depending on the size of the wound, presumably) - which is pretty damn rapid when minutes matter in saving a life.

The nanotech project, called Photochemical Tissue Bonding (PTB) [http://www2.massgeneral.org/wellman/faculty-kochevar-projects.htm] has been funded by the Pentagon for the past 8 years, and has already been used successfully in lab experiments and 31 clinical trials. "It's so simple, but such an improvement on current processes, and that's what's really remarkable," researcher Irene Kochevar told Wired.

"We're so close to these processes being used," she elaborated. "But FDA approval is still a real hurdle."

I hope they hurry up. I want a healing laser gun of my own!

(Wired: Danger Room [http://www.wired.com/dangerroom/2010/05/air-force-researchers-heal-wounds-with-lasers-and-nanotech/#ixzz0nAu0s8pq])

(Image [http://wiki.adultswim.com/xwiki/bin/Robot+Chicken/The+Mad+Scientist])

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Erana

New member
Feb 28, 2008
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Does this mean I'll get a real medigun? Or will we have to deal with a IRL Raiden?
Still, where does the nanomachines fit in? I'm not seeing them in the link...
 

Caliostro

Headhunter
Jan 23, 2008
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Unmentioned is the fact that the laser's alternate fire can render a soldier invincible for 10 seconds.

When questioned the lead tech for this new technology replied only with "Danke... Dummkopfs".

More on this as it develops.
 

Brotherofwill

New member
Jan 25, 2009
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FDA approval? Maybe it turns out this thing gives you cancer.

First thing I thought about was TF2.
Caliostro said:
Unmentioned is the fact that the laser's alternate fire can render a soldier invincible for 10 seconds.

When questioned the lead tech for this new technology replied only with "Danke... Dummkopfs".

More on this as it develops.
Hahah.
 

dmase

New member
Mar 12, 2009
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Nanotechnology has had a lot of issues. It can actually cause cancer, but I haven't heard anything about nanotechnology's uses like this causing problems.
 

Jared

The British Paladin
Jul 14, 2009
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This is pretty cool! One day all scars may be healed like this!
 

Danpascooch

Zombie Specialist
Apr 16, 2009
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This is awesome, seriously, the implications are staggering

I bet it's too advanced to ever get into the hands of regular EMTs though
 

Danpascooch

Zombie Specialist
Apr 16, 2009
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dmase said:
Nanotechnology has had a lot of issues. It can actually cause cancer, but I haven't heard anything about nanotechnology's uses like this causing problems.
Nanotechnology just means "small technology"

How does making things tiny cause cancer? Lol
 

Beltom

Professional Lurker
Sep 8, 2008
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This just in, the American military has developed advanced AI for it's weapons which will fire based on a predetermined colour. To complement this they are now clothing all of their soldiers in red, and dumping large amounts of blue paint over Afghanistan. Special forces soldiers will now also be equipped with pocket-watches which render them invisible for short periods of time.

OT: This sounds like a brilliant idea, I hope they manage to get the approval for wipe-spread use.
 

LeonLethality

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Mar 10, 2009
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This is awesome, I can't wait 'till the day they can make this a household item it could help out a lot.
 

DanDeFool

Elite Member
Aug 19, 2009
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John Funk said:
"We're so close to these processes being used," she elaborated. "But FDA approval is still a real hurdle."
You know, it just kills me how the FDA allows things like high fructose corn syrup and hydrogenated oils (trans-fats) to be sold freely, and I've seen litigation commercials against at least three FDA-approved drugs that have caused people TO DIE in as many months, but now they're going to stand in the way of healing laser.

Man, after they fix the SEC, Washington had better look at the FDA next. Stupid drug companies.

Tell you what; I'll start an internet petition drive to raise 3 million dollars to pay off FDA approval guy #4 so that we can have healing laser. Hey, it's the exact same method the drug and bio-tech companies use to get their shit approved! Why not the AFRL?

Sorry, I slipped into angry conspiracy-theorist mode for a second there. Still, it just kills me how it seems like wealthy banks and corporations can do whatever the hell they want in America and we're too busy arguing over whether or not the healthcare bill mandates death panels to do anything about it.
 

o_O

New member
Jul 19, 2009
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Hm. Sounds more like the medigel from Mass Effect. It's not so much a healing laser as some compound that reacts to a certain light. Super advanced and very effective band-aid that may work on wounds like an opened jugular one day.
 

DanDeFool

Elite Member
Aug 19, 2009
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Erana said:
Does this mean I'll get a real medigun? Or will we have to deal with a IRL Raiden?
Still, where does the nanomachines fit in? I'm not seeing them in the link...
Probably referring to the photosensitive dye. I'm guessing it's nano-engineered to respond to light in the manner described in the article.