Videogame Haiku Will Soothe Your Soul

[Tom Goldman]

Videogame Haiku Will Soothe Your Soul

There's no better way to express the feeling of playing a videogame than with a haiku.

The best thing about videogames is that they're able to transcend all barriers into every form of media, even into the world of the haiku. EOGamer [http://www.eogamer.com/node/76] has posted a large selection of videogame haiku written by Oliver "Threedog" Campbell and Danika Potts that are both serious and humorous.

A haiku is a form of Japanese poetry that consists of three lines of five, seven, and five syllables respectively. See, you learn something every day here at The Escapist, and sometimes it doesn't even involve FarmVille.

The haiku I agree with most is for Final Fantasy XIII [Final Fantasy XIII]:

Beautiful skin, hair
battle between sides rages
game sucks really hard

I didn't enjoy that game. Heavy Rain [http://www.gamestop.com/Catalog/ProductDetails.aspx?product_id=74389] also makes a debut in a more serious haiku:

Proving your worth is
the burden of this father
chasing red herring

That couldn't be more true. Campbell and Potts did two about No More Heroes [http://www.gamestop.com/Catalog/ProductDetails.aspx?product_id=11905] including:

Touchdown is the man
lightbulb katana, blood flood
take a dump to save

Seems immature, but you really do take a dump to save your game in No More Heroes. Other games covered are Fallout 3 [http://www.gamefly.com/game/ps2/Okami/120440/] wisdom:

Apocalyptic
land is ravaged; in hindsight,
vault was pretty good

Until everyone in the vault goes crazy anyway!

Via: Kotaku [http://kotaku.com/5538653/find-tranquillity-with-video-game-haiku]

Permalink

 

[Setsuhen]

Haha, loved the Fallout 3 one. "Vault was pretty good"

I'll have to take a look at the rest later.

 

[Simalacrum]

Ach, I really don't like English haiku, it just doesn't have the same rhythmical properties as Japanese haiku.

Then again, I'm bilingual, so my opinion is rather biased...

 

[NickCaligo42]

Hippopotamus
Antihippopotamus
Annihilation

 

[erbkaiser]

Nice link, rather easy to do these kind of haiku though...

Press X to Jason
The joke we hear all the time
about Heavy Rain.

"Nico My Cousin"
How friends destroy a good game...
Number should be unlisted.

Fap fap fap fap fap
"Playing" with Bayonetta
I need more hand cream.

 

[Orange Monkey]

Princess needs saving
A heroes endless nightmare
Who built these towers?

 

[Lemon Of Life]

Will definitely check the other out tomorrow.

Too darn tired for now
Will check on others later
Need to do homework.

 

[Gasaraki]

What is it with haikus anyway, and why are they better than normal poetry.

Ask the weaboos

 

[Escapefromwhatever]

What is it with haikus anyway, and why are they better than normal poetry.

Ask the weaboos

They're not necessarily better, just another form of poetry. What's fun about them is they have a structure similar to a joke- they start with the first two lines being set-up, and then hit you with a surprise, or punchline, in the end. At least, the good ones do.

 

[Jaded Scribe]

The Hero of Time
Sets forth with sword ready
Silent and stalwart


Azeroth in flames
The black dragon flies again
Heroes, ready arms

 

[Urgh76]

Link, sneaking around
Careful to not alert guards
Search for hidden key

 

[knhirt]

Guy with spiky hair
Leads team, kills guy, saves the world
His sword was too big

Quirky ball-roller
His father, the biggest douche
Obsessions with balls

 

[Treefingers]

What is it with haikus anyway, and why are they better than normal poetry.

Define 'normal' poetry...?

A haiku is simply one form of poetry, of which there are many. There is no one normal standard.

 

[Superior Mind]

Galaxy at risk
But not as important as,
Sex with aliens

(Mass Effect 2)

Meh, best minute effort.

 

[the1ultimate]

I'm sure we had a thread like this recently.

It's interesting the way Haiku works considering how deceptively simple the form is...

Er, yeah it's cool.

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

Chainsaw bayonet
Powered by testosterone
Carve me up some grubs

You can't f*** Tali
She'd die if you sneezed on her
Condoms ain't that good

"Say something, Gordon!"
Freeman thinks, and then declares,
"I hate orange suits"

That's the best I could come up with on such short notice.

 

[Aptspire]

The Portal one felt...so right ^-^

 

[scnj]

Alan Wake

Writer goes to town,
Seems very much like Twin Peaks,
David Lynch should sue.

Assassin's Creed 2

Ezio's family killed,
Take revenge on the Templars,
Desmond please fuck off.

Borderlands

No coherent plot,
Sixty seven billion guns,
I'd loot Lilith's chest

Far Cry 2

War in Africa,
Mugabe would enjoy it,
Guard posts everywhere.

Final Fantasy XIII

Corridor, cutscene,
Endless stream of enemies,
Very linear game.

Gears of War

Badass space marines,
In armour with no helmets,
Wielding chainsaw guns.

Grand Theft Auto IV

Steal cars, shoot people,
Niko wants no part of this,
Hypocritical.

Mass Effect 2

Step aside now Geth,
Martin Sheen is on the case,
Collectors gon' die.

Metro 2033

Walk through the tunnels,
Survive mutants and nazis,
Trains are always late.

Red Faction: Guerrilla

Wave your hammer round,
Miner with a Thor complex,
Die weak buildings, die!


And for a bonus:

Modelland

Awful double L,
All girls superficial whores?
Feminists will cry.

 

[BlazeTheVampire]

Galaxy at risk
But not as important as,
Sex with aliens

(Mass Effect 2)

Meh, best minute effort.

This. Is awesome. For just pulling that out of nowhere, you got a pretty good giggle out of me.