High-Speed Porsche-PlayStation Chase Lands Idiot in Jail

Andy Chalk

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Nov 12, 2002
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High-Speed Porsche-PlayStation Chase Lands Idiot in Jail


An unemployed Pennsylvania idiot is in the slammer for using his girlfriend's Porsche to chase her down and run her off the road after she got tired of his no-good, lazy ways and took his PlayStation with her to work.

42-year-old idiot Darren Suchon doesn't have a job, but he has the next-best thing: A girlfriend who owns a Porsche. So he probably thought it was okay to spend his days goofing around with his PlayStation while she went off to earn a living. But his lady friend, Colleen Frable, didn't see it in quite the same light. She finally got tired of his lollygagging ways and decided one day to help him overcome his bad habits by taking his console with her when she went to work.

This, it turns out, was more than enough to get Suchon off the couch. In a rage, he hopped into her fine, gold-colored 1996 German sports car and chased her down route 248, waving his arms, yelling, nearly crashing into her "several times" and twice forcing her onto the shoulder of the road. Finally, when it became clear that she wasn't interested in listening to reason, Suchon executed the next step in his well-formulated plan by rear-ending her while she was stuck at a red light.

That led Frable to pull into a nearby parking lot to find out double-you-tee-eff, after which Suchon hopped out of the banged-up Porsche and began yelling at her and trying to force down her window. He fled the scene when two men emerged from a nearby business to see what the fuss was all about. Frable then continued to work, where she called 911.

After his arrest, Suchon told police that Frable had taken his console with her to work once before and he simply didn't want her to do it again. "I just wanted the game, I would never hurt her," he said. "I just wanted the game." The idiot, who added that he "didn't know what the big deal was," is currently in jail under $25,000 bail and faces charges of simple assault, reckless endangerment, harassment, disorderly conduct, reckless driving and driving with a suspended or revoked license.

Questions as to why a woman whose other car really is a Porsche would keep an unemployed bum around the house while she went to work every day were unanswered at press time, but idiocy is suspected.

Source: GamePolitics [http://www.mcall.com/news/breaking/mc-lehigh-township-video-game-chase-20101011,0,1263553.story]


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Pipotchi

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Jan 17, 2008
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Ah Love makes fool of us all, She wouldnt be the first successful woman to fall for a tool, or maybe he used to be a success as well but has fallen on hard times.

Either way she is better off without him

Edit Thats also a bizarrely appropriate picture did you play a game espicially to get that?
 
Apr 28, 2008
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Andy Chalk said:
Questions as to why a woman whose other car really is a Porsche would keep an unemployed bum around the house while she went to work every day were unanswered at press time, but idiocy is suspected.
Because he's a damaged guy and some girls like to think they can "reform" them and make them better people. I've seen it happen before, and as admirable as it seems, it usually doesn't work.

Ah well. The guy's an idiot, like you say, and hopefully this will cause him to get it act together. Although maybe not, since he doesn't seem to think he did anything wrong.

Freaking idiot...
 

chemicalfire

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Nov 10, 2009
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I bet he's either hung like a moose or really submissive and she's got a thing for high-heel nut-stomping.
 

Delock

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Irridium said:
Andy Chalk said:
Questions as to why a woman whose other car really is a Porsche would keep an unemployed bum around the house while she went to work every day were unanswered at press time, but idiocy is suspected.
Because he's a damaged guy and some girls like to think they can "reform" them and make them better people. I've seen it happen before, and as admirable as it seems, it usually doesn't work.

Ah well. The guy's an idiot, like you say, and hopefully this will cause him to get it act together. Although maybe not, since he doesn't seem to think he did anything wrong.

Freaking idiot...
Even if it does work out, I've usually seen that the relationship afterwards is not as strong, if almost nonexistant.

OP: Another question, how was he able to start the car? If we're assuming it was with her keys, then why does she leave those lying around with the unemployed damaged bum in the house, especially after she had just decided to take away his game? I mean, I know hindsight's 20-20, but that seems like a pretty glaring mistake to miss.
 

Marsell

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Nov 20, 2008
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Those who live in glass houses should not throw rocks.
Except switch "live in glass house" with "Own expensive stuff"
And switch "throw rocks" with "piss off the people with easy access to them."
 

Cousin_IT

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Feb 6, 2008
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What else was he going to do? Go out & get a job? How would that help him get to play his PS3 all day?
 

Mr. Omega

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Jul 1, 2010
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*Facepalm*
This is a two-way fail.
Girl liking this guy in the first place and leaving her car keys out.
Guy... well, just read the article... most of this is his fault.
 

Pipotchi

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Jan 17, 2008
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Cousin_IT said:
What else was he going to do? Go out & get a job? How would that help him get to play his PS3 all day?
PS3? I assumed he was playing FF7 or FIFA 04 on his PSOne :)
 

Loonerinoes

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Apr 9, 2009
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Heh, colorful article.

That said...yeah. Overdeveloped sense of entitlement as well as enabling said entitlement I guess. But idiocy works too I s'pose.
 

Pingieking

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Sep 19, 2009
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Andy Chalk said:
Questions as to why a woman whose other car really is a Porsche would keep an unemployed bum around the house while she went to work every day were unanswered at press time, but idiocy is suspected.
Journalism at it's finest. If only newspapers published articles written as well as this.

This thing just made my day.
 

thenumberthirteen

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Dec 19, 2007
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Pipotchi said:
Edit Thats also a bizarrely appropriate picture did you play a game espicially to get that?
That's what I was thinking. Where did they find that?

OT: Never get between a gamer and their console. It's like stealing a Pitbull's favourite bone. You're just asking for trouble.
 

Master10K

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Feb 12, 2010
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Oh snap! That screenshot is from Need For Speed: Porsche Unleashed for the PC. I loved that game and I learnt so much about the history of the Porsche automobile.

Now as for the working woman and her boy toy... sure it's foolish that she'd be in a relationship with such a bum and that she thought she could cure his supposed game addiction. But I don't blame her for the incident, because the man is obviously nuts.
 

soilent

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Jan 2, 2010
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Pipotchi said:
Cousin_IT said:
What else was he going to do? Go out & get a job? How would that help him get to play his PS3 all day?
PS3? I assumed he was playing FF7 or FIFA 04 on his PSOne :)
Me too, it made the story infinitely funnier.
 

SmugFrog

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Sep 4, 2008
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Andy Chalk said:
"I just wanted the game, I would never hurt her," he said. "I just wanted the game." The idiot, who added that he "didn't know what the big deal was," is currently in jail under $25,000 bail and faces charges of simple assault, reckless endangerment, harassment, disorderly conduct, reckless driving and driving with a suspended or revoked license.
Thank you, moron, for helping to improve the poor image gamers already have. :(