World's Strongest Robot Deserves World's Silliest Ceremony

Greg Tito

PR for Dungeons & Dragons
Sep 29, 2005
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World's Strongest Robot Deserves World's Silliest Ceremony

The pinnacle of German engineering may just be the KUKA Titan robot which can lift 1000 kilograms and chase you down a dark alley.

The Kuka Titan is the strongest industrial robot in the world. In a ceremony that borders on the comical, guests were asked to add weights to the dumbbell until it reached mythic proportions. Then the robot performed a "clean and jerk" with the dumbbell weighing 1000 kilograms, 2204.6 pounds or a metric fuckton depending on your nomenclature.


But even more disturbing than a crazy German ceremony displaying the Titan's lifting capability is the newly added mobility. The KUKA OmniMove base allows the Titan to chase down perpetrators and crush them with its amazing strength. The OmniMove uses multidirectional wheels that allow the Titan to turn corners and maneuver itself quite well.


The cute little youBot in the foreground, basically a smaller, less capable version of the Titan, is just adorable, if deadly.

I don't know about you, but I'm frightened for how our robot overlords might use the KUKA Titan as shocktroops in their eventual takeover of the human race. For the love of all humanity, please don't connect the Titan to the Internet. We don't want to aid Skynet any more than we already have.

Source: BotJunkie [http://www.botjunkie.com/2010/11/02/worlds-strongest-robot-arm-can-now-chase-you-down/]


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V161

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Dec 8, 2009
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So now the upcoming robot revolution finally has its "ED-209"! OH SNAP!!!
 

Tom Phoenix

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Mar 28, 2009
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Someday, that arm is going to be attached to a giant mecha....and it will be awesome!
 

cairocat

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Oct 9, 2009
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I guess the designer's expectations ... *puts on glasses* really held up.

YEEAAA!!!!!!!
 

Fox242

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Nov 9, 2009
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Greeaat...now the Germans are in on the killer robot buisness? Is anyone going to do anything about this?
 

Fox242

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Nov 9, 2009
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Kalezian said:
Fox242 said:
Greeaat...now the Germans are in on the killer robot buisness? Is anyone going to do anything about this?

well.......... Japan might ally with them.......
Isn't that the last thing we want?! Why have two of the greatest enginerring nations collaborate to create our future robot overlords?
 

The Lawn

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Apr 11, 2008
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There we go... it's one of those press on battery powered lights from those 2 year old infomertials.
 

slowpoke999

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Kalezian said:
Fox242 said:
Greeaat...now the Germans are in on the killer robot buisness? Is anyone going to do anything about this?

well.......... Japan might ally with them.......
At least if Italy decides to start making robots we'll notice a trend
 

Unrulyhandbag

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Oct 21, 2009
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Greg Tito said:
The Kuka Titan is the strongest industrial robot in the world.
ahem. The FANUC M-2000iA/1200 [http://tr.fanucrobotics.info/en/Products/A_Industrial-Robots/M-2000iA/M-2000iA%201200.aspx] can lift 1200Kg's with the option for fittings to take a further 600Kg's and is just as flexible.


I have to say the omnidirectional platform is damned impressive mind.
 

StaubSauger

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Nov 18, 2009
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As for those of you, not knowing the German language, I hereby post the totally unimportant translation of the ridiculous ceremony (I don't even understand every single word he says ...:

0:28-0:31 Ladies and gentlemen, the attempt on a world record shows (?) how strong it is!
0:46-0:58 Well well, how's it going? ... the ton is applied, the ton is screwed ( o0 )
Simon (?) will give the signal for the attempt on the world record!
then, at 1:34 the slightly exagerated melody of a show which is the german equivalent to "I bet you will" for the folks above the age of 50, but including much more stupid bets (like climbing 5metres on a rope made of toilet paper
and moderated by the person who makes the ads for gummi bears in germany, plays, and everyone in the audience freaks out because the show is so amazing. This just pulls up associations better kept locked away...

But anyways, let's talk about the robot... uh

amazing :]
 

WanderingFool

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Greg Tito said:
I don't know about you, but I'm frightened for how our robot overlords might use the KUKA Titan as shocktroops in their eventual takeover of the human race. For the love of all humanity, please don't connect the Titan to the Internet. We don't want to aid Skynet any more than we already have.
Oh... you're just over reacting...

*goes back to stockpiling munitions and supplies in strike-hard bunker hidden in forest*
 

RebelRising

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slowpoke999 said:
Kalezian said:
Fox242 said:
Greeaat...now the Germans are in on the killer robot buisness? Is anyone going to do anything about this?

well.......... Japan might ally with them.......
At least if Italy decides to start making robots we'll notice a trend
If Italy gets involved, we really don't have anything to worry about.
 

Hashime

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Jan 13, 2010
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The best part is that a buddy of mine is working in an artificially intelligent, learning, teaching program at Carnegie.
 

Anarchemitis

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SomeBritishDude said:
If I ever loose my arm, I now know what will replace it.
You'll have to replace both, and then use them for walking.
That thing doesn't exactly look like it weights ten pounds.

RebelRising said:
slowpoke999 said:
Kalezian said:
Fox242 said:
Greeaat...now the Germans are in on the killer robot buisness? Is anyone going to do anything about this?

well.......... Japan might ally with them.......
At least if Italy decides to start making robots we'll notice a trend
If Italy gets involved, we really don't have anything to worry about.
Germany's been kicking America's butt in terms of mechanical and electrical engineering for many years already. I'd be more concerned with the lack of development on our part than the ample development on theirs.
 

2fish

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Sep 10, 2008
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slowpoke999 said:
Kalezian said:
Fox242 said:
Greeaat...now the Germans are in on the killer robot buisness? Is anyone going to do anything about this?

well.......... Japan might ally with them.......
At least if Italy decides to start making robots we'll notice a trend
So Japan will make the sex robots, Germany will make them really strong and probably add the soldier sofware, what will Italy add the ability to eat pasta?

I kid that is a scary idea killer sex robots, the enemy is in your own bedroom awaiting orders. Activate order 66.