Playing Kinect Results in Child Abuse

Greg Tito

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Sep 29, 2005
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Playing Kinect Results in Child Abuse

For the record, The Escapist does not advocate playing Kinect anywhere near your small children.


I want to make it perfectly clear that the video filled me with equal amounts of dread and amusement. You know exactly what's coming before you ever see it, kind of like how a horror film preys upon the audience's knowledge that the protagonist is going to be killed or maimed and draws out the scene to create that suspense. Here, a father is just happy to be playing Kinect Adventures with his son and daughter watching before, well, you guessed it, the poor little girl gets smacked in the face. Hard.

I think it's the raised arms, the horrible smack, subsequent thud and keening wail that really make me laugh *cough* I mean, shudder with horror.

Let this be a lesson to all you parents who bought a Kinect to play with your young children. Invest in seat belts or some other kind of restraint to lock your child down when you decide to take a swing. Har de har.

Oh man, I'm going to hell.

In case you need it, here's the remixed version with some slow mo goodness and the real audio preserved:


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Casual Shinji

Should've gone before we left.
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Jul 18, 2009
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Christ, that... was... brutal.

I'm amazed that little girl's face is still attached to her skull.

EDIT: Also, why are all these people filming themselves while playing Kinect? That's like asking for a smack in the face.
 

Johnnyallstar

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Feb 22, 2009
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The first time I saw that video was yesterday, and I thought it was going to be funny, like he bounced into her or something, but when I heard the *SMACK* it went from funny to worried if she was okay.
 

RatRace123

Elite Member
Dec 1, 2009
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Oh god, that was great!
Nothing brings a smile to my face like seeing children injured.

Haaaaaa, I probably have issues.

Still, lotta injuries with this thing. The Wii caused problems too, but it really didn't hurt people. It mostly hurt walls and TVs.
 

BlueberryMUNCH

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Apr 15, 2010
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SON OF A MOTHER DUCK.

Wow, that was a right ol'blugeon to the face...jeeeeeeeez.

Hope she's alright and all...but the Dad really should've kept an eye out for her -_-.

Aaaah the joys of motion control gaming:'].

EDIT: Her slow-mo scream is actually nightmare inducing. Juss'sayin.
 

Onyx Oblivion

Borderlands Addict. Again.
Sep 9, 2008
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RatRace123 said:
Oh god, that was great!
Nothing brings a smile to my face like seeing children injured.

Haaaaaa, I probably have issues.
As Mel Brooks' said:

"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die."

Yes, I was just re-watching old Moviebob episodes. How'd ya know?
 

littlewisp

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Mar 25, 2010
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Whoa. That looked incredibly painful. More than that though, I have to wonder: why did that get posted on youtube?
 

loremazd

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Dec 20, 2008
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She's fine i'm sure, it'd really only be worrisome if she wasn't crying, as then he'd have knocked her out.
 

Daveman

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Jan 8, 2009
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OUCH!!

I kept waiting for it but all I could think is that he should have been jumping because it gives you extra boost. Fucking Kinect n00b...

Anyway, it's just more proof that nobody has room in their house for Kinect, it's a right pain in the arse.
 

Scrythe

Premium Gasoline
Jun 23, 2009
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Who know who I blame for this? Microsoft, for designing a product that requires a 30x30 room. Look how fucking cramped that little room is. I'm surprised that guy can lean side-to-side comfortably without knocking down furniture.

I feel bad for the little girl. I almost felt the impact of that smack, even through my crappy laptop speakers.
 

civatrix

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Sep 23, 2010
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At least the guy didn't keep playing to keep up his high score, unlike some parents. (I'm looking at you mom who let her kid die while playing facebook games)
 

JoJo

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Ouch... I thought this was going to be funny video but that was just painful, didn't laugh at all... hope it didn't hurt her too much.