Videogames: The New Homewrecker

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
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Videogames: The New Homewrecker


A growing number of women who file for divorce say their husbands would rather spend their time playing videogames than playing with them.

There are plenty of reasons to get a divorce these days. Maybe your man leaves crumbs on the counter every night and refuses to put gas in the car. Maybe he's a serial killer. Or maybe he just has a problem with videogames.

A study conducted by Divorce Online has found that 15 percent of women who cite "unreasonable behavior" as the cause for their divorce filing point to videogames as the problem, saying that their husbands are more interested in spending time with games than with them. 15 percent may not sound like much but it's a huge increase over the previous year, when only five percent of women made the same claim.

Unsurprisingly, The Daily Mail [http://www.amazon.com/World-Warcraft-Cataclysm-Pc/dp/B002I0HKIU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1306855548&sr=8-1]. "When it became serious he was playing up to eight hours a day. I was constantly trying to get him to cut back but he didn't think he had a problem until I told him I wanted to leave. But by that time it was too late."

Videogame addiction expert Ryan G. Van Cleave said the troubles are compounded by the fact that most spouses aren't aware that videogaming can become an addiction, just like drugs and alcohol. "The reality is that with the proper professional support, a video game addict, like any other type of addict, can overcome the addiction," he said. The Mail also noted that "some" people claim that World of Warcraft is even more addictive than cocaine.

Hyperbolic stupidity notwithstanding, Divorce Online Managing Director Mark Keenan was initially surprised by the numbers but expects it to be even higher next year. "The increase could be a consequence of people staying indoors more because of the recession," he said, "or it might be being used by men in particular as a means of escape from an already unhappy relationship."

Call me crazy but I think he may be onto something.


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Thyunda

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May 4, 2009
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My God, I think I might actually take the Daily Mail seriously on this one. It is true video game addiction is just as plausible as alcohol and other drugs. And I can't even see any deliberate slights against videogaming. Nice.
 

Baldr

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Jan 6, 2010
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Maybe if some of these people spent more time playing together instead of getting them to quit, there wouldn't be as much of a problem, and it is easier to quit an addiction with other people than by yourself.

Those that play together, stay together.
 

Mister Benoit

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Hmmm... Maybe if they enjoy their hobbies so much they should be finding a significant other who also enjoys the hobby? I've met a fair amount of couples that play games together and I mean a lot. One couple I know took a week off work when Cataclysm came out.

I think these people just need to find someone else who identifies and enjoys their preferred poison.

If I absolutely love rock climbing and going to the gym to the point where it requires me to leave early in the morning and return late at night, i'm pretty sure if my significant other doesn't also enjoy those activities they're going to complain.

It's all about finding someone who can share or at least respect your hobbies, and of course make each other happy.
 

Anachronism

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Thyunda said:
My God, I think I might actually take the Daily Mail seriously on this one.
GET THIS MAN TO A HOSPITAL! QUICKLY!

Joking aside, as wrong as it feels to say this, I actually agree. That said, if it were only the Fail saying this, I would completely ignore them, but far more reliable sources have said that video game addiction can be a serious problem, and I'm disinclined to ignore their opinion. That said, I call bullsh*t on the idea that online gaming is more addictive than cocaine.

But still, CoD and WoW? Really? I know they're probably the two most played games at the moment, but there are far more worthwhile games to get addicted to.

Baldr said:
Maybe if some of these people spent more time playing together instead of getting them to quit, there wouldn't be as much of a problem, and it is easier to quit an addiction with other people than by yourself.

Those that play together, stay together.
And now we have yet another reason why split-screen co-op needs to come back. Unless you refer to another kind of playing, in which case, well, couples should do that too.
 

Thyunda

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Anachronism said:
But still, CoD and WoW? Really? I know they're probably the two most played games at the moment, but there are far more worthwhile games to get addicted to.
Are you the sort of person who hears about a drug bust where tonnes of poorly made cocaine is seized, and simply tuts at their poor taste?
 

Catchy Slogan

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Thyunda said:
My God, I think I might actually take the Daily Mail seriously on this one. It is true video game addiction is just as plausible as alcohol and other drugs. And I can't even see any deliberate slights against videogaming. Nice.
The Daily Mail... Being fair. I... I need to go lie down for a while.

Baldr said:
Those that play together, stay together.
Or acuse each other of screen watching/ cheating, and dissolve into childish name calling :p

Some relationships just aren't meant to last.
 

Anachronism

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Thyunda said:
Anachronism said:
But still, CoD and WoW? Really? I know they're probably the two most played games at the moment, but there are far more worthwhile games to get addicted to.
Are you the sort of person who hears about a drug bust where tonnes of poorly made cocaine is seized, and simply tuts at their poor taste?
Maybe...

No, I see your point. I phrased that pretty badly in hindsight. I guess it's because of the multiplayer aspect to them; a single player game has a definite ending, whereas games like these don't, so they're obviously going to be more addictive.
 

Carnagath

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Andy Chalk said:
"or it might be being used by men in particular as a means of escape from an already unhappy relationship."
Nahhhhhhh, it's gotta be the cocaine thing!
 

Thyunda

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Anachronism said:
Thyunda said:
Anachronism said:
But still, CoD and WoW? Really? I know they're probably the two most played games at the moment, but there are far more worthwhile games to get addicted to.
Are you the sort of person who hears about a drug bust where tonnes of poorly made cocaine is seized, and simply tuts at their poor taste?
Maybe...

No, I see your point. I phrased that pretty badly in hindsight. I guess it's because of the multiplayer aspect to them; a single player game has a definite ending, whereas games like these don't, so they're obviously going to be more addictive.
I was messing with you. I, too, am offended that such...lacklustre titles are given ADDICTIVE status, and yet the real, classy games are treated as the odd herbal cigarette.
 

DeadlyYellow

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Jun 18, 2008
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Your editor is naughty.

I've known couples who have suffered this though (WoW caused especially,) but it's not a behavior I'm prone to.
 

OneStepAhead

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I believe it's more of a personality thing...people who are weak minded and easily influenced can get addicted to anything they enjoy, including gaming. It's not the game that has the problem, it's the player.
 

Bretty

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These are always funny "by the time I told him it was a problem I was leaving"...

So you could have made a huge issue out of it but decided to leave instead. Yeah.

I understand that many relationships suffer because of this hobby. But to blame it on the hobby is rediculous. There is a reason he is spending all his time ingame, your a bad lay, you are annoying and/or clingy.

There is a reason people play games to an obsessive level and it has nothing to do with games (IMO). Mental defects, depression, satisfaction with life all effect how much we choose to temper our lives with other persuits. Marriages and relationships are complicated, and often the time sinks which MMOs are can definetly hurt a failing relationship, but a good one? To say these people's relationships were good before hand is a load of balls. I am married, I play MMOs. I know when my wife wants attention and when it would be dangerous to my well being to login. Just as she knows when I need to chillout and escape.

I think this just shows a greater trend on people getting married when maybe they shouldn't be? Divorce rates in general are going up so there is a much bigger trend then, "my husband has sex with trolls under a bridge!"
 

rickynumber24

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Bretty said:
These are always funny "by the time I told him it was a problem I was leaving"...

So you could have made a huge issue out of it but decided to leave instead. Yeah.
From OP:
"When it became serious he was playing up to eight hours a day. I was constantly trying to get him to cut back but he didn't think he had a problem until I told him I wanted to leave. But by that time it was too late."

I think you misread the quote. She was making a big deal out of it, but he didn't care. (or, at least she thought she was) That said, the rest of the things you said may well have been true. You can find people with just about any problem, generally without wanting to admit that problem, if you look hard enough. (... and I wouldn't want to admit any such problem to the newspaper anyway)
 

Daddy Go Bot

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I do wanna point out that there's literally no such thing as "video game addiction". It's complete nonsense from a medical stand point.
 

thethingthatlurks

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Feb 16, 2010
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Anybody find the concept of filing for divorce because your spouse plays them video games for too long absolutely hilarious? I mean unlike alcoholism or drug use, the fix for this is stupidly simple: unplug the goddamn TV/computer and say those dreaded four words "we need to talk."
'course, too many people get married in the first place, so I am not particularly surprised that somebody would use one's gaming habit as an excuse to file for divorce. Whatever, people being idiots, nothing new...

Although I have to say this: The Daily Mail not printing an outrageously stupid article is a first for me. I think I may still be in shock..
 

Eclipse Dragon

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Video games are no cause for problems in my relationship. Me and my boyfriend play games together and it brings us closer. Of course co-op is preferable to pvp, playing pvp against a lover could cause relationship issues if one of us happens to be a lot better then the other.