Conquer the Video Craze: The Videogame Hint LP

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
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Conquer the Video Craze: The Videogame Hint LP


It's all very simple now but there was a time when people who needed videogame hints had to turn to Conquer the Video Craze, a hint guide for arcade machines that was released in 1982 - on LP.

You kids these days. It's all "internet" this and "FAQ" that. If you get stuck in a game for more than three minutes you're off to GameFAQs [http://www.gamefaqs.com] to look up the answer, not that there's any excuse for getting stuck in any of the childishly simple tripe that passes for "challenge" these days. You have no idea what it's like to have to work at your videogames.

When I was your age, videogames cost money. If you sucked at them, they cost a lot of money. Saving your game meant putting a quarter on the console. And if your bumbling incompetence was outweighed only by your desperation for the approval of your fellow arcadians, you did the only thing you could: You shelled out for Conquer the Video Craze, a collection of hints for the era's most popular arcade machines on LP record.

The idea of videogame hints on an album may sound crazy (Do you even know what an album is?) but Giant Bomb [http://www.giantbomb.com/news/before-faqs-conquer-the-video-craze/1483/] has the proof, with photos and even a video of the record playing hints for Centipede. Of course, you couldn't actually listen to it at the arcade (Do you even know what a turntable is?) so you were forced to either memorize the thing or take notes. And if you forgot what you were supposed to do, you had to run home, listen again, get some more quarters and start over!

Yeah, those were the good ol' days.


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squid5580

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Feb 20, 2008
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I wonder if that is the reason everyone now seems to believe that games have become to easy. Not that they haven't become beatable since those good ole days but the moment you become even remotely stuck you can go to your computer and find the easiest way to get by.
 

belgariontheking

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Jun 9, 2009
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Somewhere on the internet, someone has transferred these to mp3 many years ago. I can't be buggered to find it, but I believe I found them in a link from joystiq in 2005 or something.
 

I III II X4

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Nov 14, 2008
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I wonder if my Grandpa had ever seen that LP...

Anyway, regardless of whether it's the more recent arcade games, or the very first ones such as Dig-Dug, I do the honorable thing and blow my entire stash of quarters.

Arcade gaming is an art form which cannot be defaced by FAQ and 'hint' users.
 

coldfrog

Can you feel around inside?
Dec 22, 2008
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I love how the title suggests you can "Beat" pac-man. Or really most of those games. I'm sure it meant high scores. But still.

I guess beating a game meant different things in those days.

Go Sexy Randall the Pharaoh Wizard!
 

joystickjunki3

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Nov 2, 2008
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Not that I'm really complaining about the actual article, but does this actually count as news? I suppose nothing can top the good ol' Moonwalker's death, eh?
 

belgariontheking

New member
Jun 9, 2009
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I changed my mind and did a quick google search to find the trail to the mp3s.

http://www.dinosaurgardens.com/archives/161

It appears Joystiq found it on boingboing, who in turn found it on this dinosaur gardens site.

You can thank me later in the form of mailing me the quarters you saved.

All these other articles in the trail are from 2006.
 

Eric the Orange

Gone Gonzo
Apr 29, 2008
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I guess you must be older than me. By the time I was 4-5 and had the hand eye coordination to play games at any level the nintendo was out, so the whole arcade world skiped me by.
 

Pendragon9

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Apr 26, 2009
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Man, the people with this were very lucky. I spent enough money on arcade machines to buy a PS3, 360, Wii, high end PC, and peace in the middle east.

Especially on Galaga.