White House Denies UFO Contact

Earnest Cavalli

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Jun 19, 2008
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White House Denies UFO Contact



Seriously guys, there are no aliens. Would the government lie to you?

After receiving two recent petitions (which collected over 17,000 signatures) asking that the White House come clean about the United States' knowledge of extraterrestrial life, the heads of our government have issued a formal, official response [https://wwws.whitehouse.gov/petitions#!/response/searching-et-no-evidence-yet]:

Thank you for signing the petition asking the Obama Administration to acknowledge an extraterrestrial presence here on Earth.

The U.S. government has no evidence that any life exists outside our planet, or that an extraterrestrial presence has contacted or engaged any member of the human race. In addition, there is no credible information to suggest that any evidence is being hidden from the public's eye.

Continuing, the reply offers information on a number of research initiatives searching the skies for signs of life, including NASA's Kepler spacecraft [http://www.seti.org/].

As a final point, the White House addresses the statistical probability of intelligent life -- likely in an effort to head off any pedants just itching to say the same:

A last point: Many scientists and mathematicians have looked with a statistical mindset at the question of whether life likely exists beyond Earth and have come to the conclusion that the odds are pretty high that somewhere among the trillions and trillions of stars in the universe there is a planet other than ours that is home to life.

Many have also noted, however, that the odds of us making contact with any of them-especially any intelligent ones-are extremely small, given the distances involved.

But that's all statistics and speculation. The fact is we have no credible evidence of extraterrestrial presence here on Earth.

So there you go. I realize you would-be Mulders are going to immediately decry this response as a smokescreen for Majestic 12 or say that this is clear evidence of Illuminati influence, but c'mon people. Let's be mature about this.

Even assuming that there are aliens that the government wants to keep under wraps, I think it's pretty obvious that the shapeshifting lizardmen who rule mankind from the shadows have an excellent reason for keeping it from us.

Source: MSNBC [http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/45176460/ns/technology_and_science/#.TrhCr3HY2Er]

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Sixties Spidey

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Jan 24, 2008
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Why did I read that as "we don't want to spend more on the space program. Now get off our backs."?
 

RedEyesBlackGamer

The Killjoy Detective returns!
Jan 23, 2011
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Th fact that they even had to issue that statement says a lot of not so good things about people's gullibility and superstitions.
 

thenumberthirteen

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Dec 19, 2007
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Of course there are Aliens. The government just doesn't know about them. Just look behind you.
<youtube=bMhIzwmEdkk>

I see this in the same light as those insufferable Obama "Birthers" who went on and on wanting to make super duper sure he was an American, and not Bin Laden in a mask or something.
 

Snotnarok

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Nov 17, 2008
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If aliens did know about us and were capable of easily traveling the stars, why the hell would they stop by OUR planet and talk? That's like any one of us stopping by an ant hill and trying to talk to them.

We're a tiny race who can't get past our own religious views and xenophobia, why would ANYONE visit?
 

Richardplex

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Jun 22, 2011
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LIES! SQUISHY LIIIIES!!!!

...Did these petitioners really expect a different response? Even if there was alien contact the government wouldn't be like "S'up guys, so yeah, totally was alien contact, lulz"


Snotnarok said:
If aliens did know about us and were capable of easily traveling the stars, why the hell would they stop by OUR planet and talk? That's like any one of us stopping by an ant hill and trying to talk to them.

We're a tiny race who can't get past our own religious views and xenophobia, why would ANYONE visit?
The same reason we would stop by an ant hill -with fire. But I see no apocalypse yet, so that isn't likely either. That or I just lived through it, which I'd also be fine with.
 

dvd_72

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Jun 7, 2010
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You know, if we believed everything the government said, then we wouldn't have all these fun conspiracy theories to keep us entertained! Come on guys, do you have to be sutch party poopers? :p
 

GoddyofAus

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Here's a rule: Whenever the White House goes out of its way to say something publicly, be suspicious.
 

CM156_v1legacy

Revelation 9:6
Mar 23, 2011
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Of course there are aliens!

Look!

TELL THE TRUTH!

OT: Even if there were (which I don't think there are), they'd say this. So this was pointless.
 

Scarim Coral

Jumped the ship
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Oct 29, 2010
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This is all I can think of when I was reading this news.
Yeah, they don't lie and look at how well that had turn out. (BTW the clip is from Alien Vs Predator Requiem.)
 

Monsterfurby

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Mar 7, 2008
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What, a straight answer from the government?

Looks like the world is going to end soon, after all.

PS: Government agencies never lie (as for politicians, well, that's a different story). They always speak the "technical" truth. "We can not confirm nor deny at this point..." is a typical evasion, but there are more complex and elaborate ones. If they just tell you "no", you can be pretty sure they are telling the truth.
 

Agayek

Ravenous Gormandizer
Oct 23, 2008
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While I make it a point to distrust anything and everything the government says, I have to admit that I'm with them on this one. The odds of intelligent life visiting our planet, then not doing anything while here is extremely slim. The only way the trip would be worth the expense is if they came and cleansed our planet of all life before stripping it of resources. Since we're all still alive, it's safe to conclude that we haven't been visited by aliens.
 

RagTagBand

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Jul 7, 2011
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The very fact that someone has to pen a response to this idiocy should embarrass anyone with even the slightest bit of intelligence.
 

MammothBlade

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Oct 12, 2011
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An official statement doesn't exactly prove anything. The US government is not to be trusted, especially if files and evidence of UFOs are top-secret. You want to prove that there really are no aliens, open Area 51, Groom Lake, Cheyenne Mountain, and all the other so-called "black facilities" to tourism, because only showing that these are not harbouring alien corpses or technology will reasonably quell this sort of suspicion.
 

Monsterfurby

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Agayek said:
While I make it a point to distrust anything and everything the government says, I have to admit that I'm with them on this one. The odds of intelligent life visiting our planet, then not doing anything while here is extremely slim. The only way the trip would be worth the expense is if they came and cleansed our planet of all life before stripping it of resources. Since we're all still alive, it's safe to conclude that we haven't been visited by aliens.
Actually, I do get the feeling that a couple of centuries from now, it's going to be us making life miserable for other species while robbing them of their resources. We *are* extremely talented at that.

Edit:
Octogunspunk said:
open Area 51, Groom Lake, Cheyenne Mountain, and all the other black facilities to tourism, because only showing that these are not harbouring alien corpses or technology will reasonably quell this sort of suspicion.
There is a reason military test sites are closed to the public. They are harboring secrets there. It's not the UFO-crowd they are mainly afraid of, but the odd Chinese/Iranian and even German or French spy who might be interested in what they are building. Groom Lake/Area 51 is well known to be a military prototype testing site, and they are actually doing tours through the NORAD command centre in Colorado Springs/Cheyenne Mountain. (Source: http://www.csdb.org/Default.aspx?DN=9c20fba0-e629-4e33-ac7a-951e4eaeaee9 )