Scientology Spoof Takes Grand Theft Auto V Ads Viral

Earnest Cavalli

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Scientology Spoof Takes Grand Theft Auto V Ads Viral



Rockstar Games has taken the Grand Theft Auto V ad blitz viral, with a new site seeking followers for a religion dubbed the "Epsilon Program."

Since Grand Theft Auto III, each game in the series has featured dozens of jabs at modern culture. From crass consumerism to American foreign policy, the Grand Theft Auto developers have a throwaway gag for everything, and their next target is apparently Scientology.

A new site recently launched by Rockstar Games asks potential converts if they "want to be happy and free from thought," before asking potential Grand Theft Auto V players for their personal info. It's not what it seems however. Instead of joining a virtual religion, dropping your info (and, most crucially, a photograph) into the website instead inserts your name into a pool of potential characters for the upcoming open-world sandbox game. According to the "Terms" section of the viral site, the Epsilon Program is actually a sweepstakes of sorts, designed to give fans "an opportunity to be cast as one of five Epsilon Program members in Grand Theft Auto V."

There's no word on how extensive a role as an Epsilon Member might be, but if past games are any indicator, we expect these devout followers to voice a few lines heard at random by the player which take blatant shots at organized religion as a whole, and in particular, Scientology.

Why Scientology? Rockstar's reasoning appears simple: Since it was founded in 1952, the church of Scientology has been the target of numerous controversies. In recent years it has attracted a number of prominent Hollywood stars (most notably, Tom Cruise), and their involvement, coupled with the church's hyper-secretive nature and seemingly alarming practices have made Scientology a popular go-to institution for those hoping to decry the practice of blindly following any organization.

Plus, Rockstar needs to fill its quota of recognizable, modern groups at which the in-game radio stations in Grand Theft Auto V can take a swing. It just wouldn't be a GTA game without blunt satire filling the virtual airwaves.

If you're interested in joining the Epsilon Program, you have until midnight on May 27 to drop your personal information into the virtual hat. We've got no idea what happens from there, but if you're selected, expect Rockstar to be in touch.

Source: Epsilon Program [http://www.epsilonprogram.com/]

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Ldude893

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Ah, the Church of Scientology. Any religious organization that ruined countless lives through deceit and trickery deserves as much ridicule as possible.
 

josemlopes

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Actually the Epsilon Program and Kifflom has been in the GTA universe for a really long time, going back even to GTA Vice City.
 

Dr.Awkward

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I like how the guy in the image has that Max Payne permanent raised brow + slight smirk going on...
 

Earnest Cavalli

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josemlopes said:
Actually the Epsilon Program and Kifflom has been in the GTA universe for a really long time, going back even to GTA Vice City.
Correct. However, this site/promotion is brand new.
 

josemlopes

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Earnest Cavalli said:
josemlopes said:
Actually the Epsilon Program and Kifflom has been in the GTA universe for a really long time, going back even to GTA Vice City.
Correct. However, this site/promotion is brand new.
Ah, yes. I was just saying that for people to know that its part of a long joke that Rockstar has been doing.
 

UrinalDook

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josemlopes said:
Actually the Epsilon Program and Kifflom has been in the GTA universe for a really long time, going back even to GTA Vice City.
Came here to say pretty much this. I... don't actually remember them being in Vice, but it rang a bell immediately from San Andreas. By either huge coincidence, or more likely MASSIVE CONSPIRACY, the very first section of this two hour long radio show is the one I was looking for. Enjoy, kids.


Also, Chris Formage's voice is amazing. I hope they've got the same guy for V. And that he's a mission giver.

I'm pretty sure there were also some hilarious adverts involving getting money to build a rocket, but I'm not even sure if that was in SA, let alone where I might find them.
 

The Inquisitive Mug

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josemlopes said:
Actually the Epsilon Program and Kifflom has been in the GTA universe for a really long time, going back even to GTA Vice City.
Yeah, I seem to remember the leader of Epsilon Program being on WCTR in San Andreas, arguing with Lazlo and Darius Fontaine, the founder of Inversion Therapy.
 

1337mokro

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Ldude893 said:
Ah, the Church of Scientology. Any religious organization that ruined countless lives through deceit and trickery deserves as much ridicule as possible.
So all of them?

We're gonna get allot of parody cults in a single game if your only criteria is ruining lives, each and every one of them has that down to a fucking art form.

However I sadly won't be joining this. Got a strict no fotograph on the internet policy. I managed to stay off it up to now, ain't gonna put it up for a silly promo.
 

The Artificially Prolonged

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Thetan lawyers don't have internet access, right? :p

Good luck to Rockstar in their promotion. Any jab at Scientology is fair game in my book.
 

Parakeettheprawn

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I really find it funny what they're doing here, but there's one thing that keeps worrying me -- there are people who are going to try to apply this to all religions, not just obviously dubious ones like Scientology. More demotivational low-jabs... great.

1337mokro said:
Ldude893 said:
Ah, the Church of Scientology. Any religious organization that ruined countless lives through deceit and trickery deserves as much ridicule as possible.
So all of them?
I'm not trying to be a Debbie Downer or anything here, or some sort of religious apologist, I'm just... well actually, yeah, I'm bit tired of how religion often gets treated with games. It rarely seems like even supposed "Religious" games made by people of a particular religion understand how to make it work right. I'm not saying there shouldn't be secular games or anything -- I'm fine with that, I just want equal treatment, which supposedly is supposed to exist despite the amount of religious bashing I've been seeing recently...

Sorry, sort of went off on a tangent there.
 

Legion

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I love Rockstar so much for this. Not because I have any particularly strong feelings about Scientology, but because I love how tongue-in-cheek they are. They remember that they are making an entertainment product and that seems to fit into their whole business model as well.
 

The Inquisitive Mug

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Parakeettheprawn said:
I really find it funny what they're doing here, but there's one thing that keeps worrying me -- there are people who are going to try to apply this to all religions, not just obviously dubious ones like Scientology. More demotivational low-jabs... great.

1337mokro said:
Ldude893 said:
Ah, the Church of Scientology. Any religious organization that ruined countless lives through deceit and trickery deserves as much ridicule as possible.
So all of them?
I'm not trying to be a Debbie Downer or anything here, or some sort of religious apologist, I'm just... well actually, yeah, I'm bit tired of how religion often gets treated with games. It rarely seems like even supposed "Religious" games made by people of a particular religion understand how to make it work right. I'm not saying there shouldn't be secular games or anything -- I'm fine with that, I just want equal treatment, which supposedly is supposed to exist despite the amount of religious bashing I've been seeing recently...

Sorry, sort of went off on a tangent there.
I sort of agree with you, but at the same time, I feel like Scientology shouldn't get a free ride even though I can't explain from neutral perspective why it shouldn't if major religions do. I guess the problem there is whether one should look at Scientology as a religion or a cult. While I can understand your ire with religion in games, having a belief system that portends to the supernatural does not automatically exhume you from criticism or parody. So how does one judge one religion (say: Islam) against another (say: Scientology)? By what standard are we to examine to sets of faith-based beliefs and call one sillier than the other or "obviously dubious", and therefore, an acceptable target? Are we just ready to say "Fuck Scientology" and lambast them in a game only because they're less popular than Islam, and therefore a cult?

I think so. But I'm an atheist, so I'm admittedly a tad biased.
 

HalfTangible

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The Inquisitive Mug said:
Parakeettheprawn said:
I really find it funny what they're doing here, but there's one thing that keeps worrying me -- there are people who are going to try to apply this to all religions, not just obviously dubious ones like Scientology. More demotivational low-jabs... great.

1337mokro said:
Ldude893 said:
Ah, the Church of Scientology. Any religious organization that ruined countless lives through deceit and trickery deserves as much ridicule as possible.
So all of them?
I'm not trying to be a Debbie Downer or anything here, or some sort of religious apologist, I'm just... well actually, yeah, I'm bit tired of how religion often gets treated with games. It rarely seems like even supposed "Religious" games made by people of a particular religion understand how to make it work right. I'm not saying there shouldn't be secular games or anything -- I'm fine with that, I just want equal treatment, which supposedly is supposed to exist despite the amount of religious bashing I've been seeing recently...

Sorry, sort of went off on a tangent there.
I sort of agree with you, but at the same time, I feel like Scientology shouldn't get a free ride even though I can't explain from neutral perspective why it shouldn't if major religions do. I guess the problem there is whether one should look at Scientology as a religion or a cult. While I can understand your ire with religion in games, having a belief system that portends to the supernatural does not automatically exhume you from criticism or parody. So how does one judge one religion (say: Islam) against another (say: Scientology)? By what standard are we to examine to sets of faith-based beliefs and call one sillier than the other or "obviously dubious", and therefore, an acceptable target? Are we just ready to say "Fuck Scientology" and lambast them in a game only because they're less popular than Islam, and therefore a cult?

I think so. But I'm an atheist, so I'm admittedly a tad biased.
I might be biased, but personally I don't give Scientology a free ride because:
1) there's no real core philosophy to it that I can see, beyond 'this is why we have problems' and 'make money'. Christianity? "Forgive others and believe Jesus is your savior". Buddhism? "Give up material possessions to achieve enlightenment". Islam? "Follow these pillars of faith." Granted, each of those religions is more complicated than that, but you can at least get a general idea.
2) even its founder didn't believe it and, in fact, said that the best way to make money is to found a religion.
3) it's a very aggressive religion. Sure, Jehovah's witnesses might get annoying but they don't threaten to sue if you make fun of them. In my experience, individual members of a religion are much worse than the religion as a whole. Scientology, on the other hand, seems to enjoy suing (or threatening to sue) anyone who wants to make fun of them (see Issac Hayes, the voice of Chef on south park)
 

Storm Dragon

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The Inquisitive Mug said:
Are we just ready to say "Fuck Scientology" and lambast them in a game only because they're less popular than Islam, and therefore a cult?
Well, yeah. Scientology is nuts.

I don't plan on entering this. I just don't want to have a nutjob cultist NPC walking around with my face.
 

rasputin0009

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Expect lawsuits and defamatory accusations towards Rockstar. Because of Scientology's Fair Game Policy. Which supports members attacking any and all who are critical of Scientology. They had one of their earliest critics investigated for terrorism, and had a plan set up to murder her. In official Church documents.
 

The Inquisitive Mug

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HalfTangible said:
The Inquisitive Mug said:
Parakeettheprawn said:
I really find it funny what they're doing here, but there's one thing that keeps worrying me -- there are people who are going to try to apply this to all religions, not just obviously dubious ones like Scientology. More demotivational low-jabs... great.

1337mokro said:
Ldude893 said:
Ah, the Church of Scientology. Any religious organization that ruined countless lives through deceit and trickery deserves as much ridicule as possible.
So all of them?
I'm not trying to be a Debbie Downer or anything here, or some sort of religious apologist, I'm just... well actually, yeah, I'm bit tired of how religion often gets treated with games. It rarely seems like even supposed "Religious" games made by people of a particular religion understand how to make it work right. I'm not saying there shouldn't be secular games or anything -- I'm fine with that, I just want equal treatment, which supposedly is supposed to exist despite the amount of religious bashing I've been seeing recently...

Sorry, sort of went off on a tangent there.
I sort of agree with you, but at the same time, I feel like Scientology shouldn't get a free ride even though I can't explain from neutral perspective why it shouldn't if major religions do. I guess the problem there is whether one should look at Scientology as a religion or a cult. While I can understand your ire with religion in games, having a belief system that portends to the supernatural does not automatically exhume you from criticism or parody. So how does one judge one religion (say: Islam) against another (say: Scientology)? By what standard are we to examine to sets of faith-based beliefs and call one sillier than the other or "obviously dubious", and therefore, an acceptable target? Are we just ready to say "Fuck Scientology" and lambast them in a game only because they're less popular than Islam, and therefore a cult?

I think so. But I'm an atheist, so I'm admittedly a tad biased.
I might be biased, but personally I don't give Scientology a free ride because:
1) there's no real core philosophy to it that I can see, beyond 'this is why we have problems' and 'make money'. Christianity? "Forgive others and believe Jesus is your savior". Buddhism? "Give up material possessions to achieve enlightenment". Islam? "Follow these pillars of faith." Granted, each of those religions is more complicated than that, but you can at least get a general idea.
2) even its founder didn't believe it and, in fact, said that the best way to make money is to found a religion.
3) it's a very aggressive religion. Sure, Jehovah's witnesses might get annoying but they don't threaten to sue if you make fun of them. In my experience, individual members of a religion are much worse than the religion as a whole. Scientology, on the other hand, seems to enjoy suing (or threatening to sue) anyone who wants to make fun of them (see Issac Hayes, the voice of Chef on south park)
I see. It's not a matter of trying prove their beliefs are somehow more "true" than other religions, but more a matter that all their views are shitty and harmful, with virtually none of the redeeming qualities or actions found in other, major religions. Basically, Scientology has it coming. I can vibe with that.

Storm Dragon said:
Well, yeah. Scientology is nuts.

I don't plan on entering this. I just don't want to have a nutjob cultist NPC walking around with my face.
I suppose not. It would be a bit Wolfenstein having a contest to put your face on a nazi.
 

1337mokro

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Parakeettheprawn said:
I really find it funny what they're doing here, but there's one thing that keeps worrying me -- there are people who are going to try to apply this to all religions, not just obviously dubious ones like Scientology. More demotivational low-jabs... great.

1337mokro said:
Ldude893 said:
Ah, the Church of Scientology. Any religious organization that ruined countless lives through deceit and trickery deserves as much ridicule as possible.
So all of them?
I'm not trying to be a Debbie Downer or anything here, or some sort of religious apologist, I'm just... well actually, yeah, I'm bit tired of how religion often gets treated with games. It rarely seems like even supposed "Religious" games made by people of a particular religion understand how to make it work right. I'm not saying there shouldn't be secular games or anything -- I'm fine with that, I just want equal treatment, which supposedly is supposed to exist despite the amount of religious bashing I've been seeing recently...

Sorry, sort of went off on a tangent there.
Well to be quite honest what's the difference? Whether you pay the 8% church tax or you pay for audits. Scientology just steals money more blatantly, L. Ron even said the best way to make money is to sucker people into a religion.

Sure I get it it's not a nice thing to say and that particular religion might mean allot to people... but those same arguments apply to Scientologists. They are happy giving these charlatans their money, their religion gives them whatever fuzzy feeling other people get from theirs. Though again in my eyes it should be a cautionary tale of just how blatant religions can get with ripping you off and people still won't notice. In fact they will even threaten you and harass you if you dare to point out the basic flaws in this ponzi scheme of a religion. (Golden Pope Throne anyone?)

They do it to each other all the time to, so why not join in with the fun whilst they don't realize we're laughing at all of them.

If it makes you feel any better I despise them all equally, unless it's the Roman Catholic church. That ranks slightly lower on my list simply because of the evil they have perpetuated even in modern day. Might add Mormons slightly above them because they have a book that literally says black people are evil. Kind of weighing child molestation and racism against each other, tough choices, tough choices.
 

The Inquisitive Mug

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1337mokro said:
Parakeettheprawn said:
I really find it funny what they're doing here, but there's one thing that keeps worrying me -- there are people who are going to try to apply this to all religions, not just obviously dubious ones like Scientology. More demotivational low-jabs... great.

1337mokro said:
Ldude893 said:
Ah, the Church of Scientology. Any religious organization that ruined countless lives through deceit and trickery deserves as much ridicule as possible.
So all of them?
I'm not trying to be a Debbie Downer or anything here, or some sort of religious apologist, I'm just... well actually, yeah, I'm bit tired of how religion often gets treated with games. It rarely seems like even supposed "Religious" games made by people of a particular religion understand how to make it work right. I'm not saying there shouldn't be secular games or anything -- I'm fine with that, I just want equal treatment, which supposedly is supposed to exist despite the amount of religious bashing I've been seeing recently...

Sorry, sort of went off on a tangent there.
Well to be quite honest what's the difference? Whether you pay the 8% church tax or you pay for audits. Scientology just steals money more blatantly, L. Ron even said the best way to make money is to sucker people into a religion.

Sure I get it it's not a nice thing to say and that particular religion might mean allot to people... but those same arguments apply to Scientologists. They are happy giving these charlatans their money, their religion gives them whatever fuzzy feeling other people get from theirs. Though again in my eyes it should be a cautionary tale of just how blatant religions can get with ripping you off and people still won't notice. In fact they will even threaten you and harass you if you dare to point out the basic flaws in this ponzi scheme of a religion. (Golden Pope Throne anyone?)

They do it to each other all the time to, so why not join in with the fun whilst they don't realize we're laughing at all of them.

If it makes you feel any better I despise them all equally, unless it's the Roman Catholic church. That ranks slightly lower on my list simply because of the evil they have perpetuated even in modern day. Might add Mormons slightly above them because they have a book that literally says black people are evil. Kind of weighing child molestation and racism against each other, tough choices, tough choices.
I have a feeling you would enjoy "The Pope Rap (Modern Day Profit)" by Trevor Moore. It's a catchy little gangster rap by the pope in which he brags about all of the money the church brings in, poking at a lot of the shady and unethical things in the history of the papacy. There's even a Whitest Kids U Know style music video of it on YouTube for added hilarity.
 

TrulyBritish

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Parakeettheprawn said:
I really find it funny what they're doing here, but there's one thing that keeps worrying me -- there are people who are going to try to apply this to all religions, not just obviously dubious ones like Scientology. More demotivational low-jabs... great.

1337mokro said:
Ldude893 said:
Ah, the Church of Scientology. Any religious organization that ruined countless lives through deceit and trickery deserves as much ridicule as possible.
So all of them?
I'm not trying to be a Debbie Downer or anything here, or some sort of religious apologist, I'm just... well actually, yeah, I'm bit tired of how religion often gets treated with games. It rarely seems like even supposed "Religious" games made by people of a particular religion understand how to make it work right. I'm not saying there shouldn't be secular games or anything -- I'm fine with that, I just want equal treatment, which supposedly is supposed to exist despite the amount of religious bashing I've been seeing recently...

Sorry, sort of went off on a tangent there.
I see what you're getting at, but I'd be interested to know what games you're thinking of that take a jab at religion specifically, especially in its modern day form. I'm not all that hardcore a gamer but to my mind games tend to focus more and jabbing at either religion in it's oldest form, during it's heretic burning slave owning days or at the modern day institutions. In which case I don't see the difference between that and mocking any other institution like the Government, the military or business (especially science).
In fact possibly the worst to my mind would be the Assassins Creed series which out and tells you that religion is wrong (especially in the ending of AC3).
Do let me know what you think though. As an atheist maybe I'm just not paying attention to it all that much.