265: Punching the Baby Seal of PC Gaming
- Thread starter Chuck Wendig
- Start date
You are much wiser than I.RhombusHatesYou said:
In fact, you're probably stealing my PC parts while I nap.
I deserve it, admittedly.
-- Chuck
I find it odd that the Escapist would post this at all really, it's nothing but an ignorant hate speech from a person that has clearly never properly learned to use a computer.
I soooo totally hear you Chuck Wendig -- contributor.Chuck Wendig said:
I so empathised.
It was like when you listen a song or watch a film and think of suing Bob Dylan or Ridley Scott (or Gerard Damiano) for basing their stuff upon your life. It was like that reading your post. And so I too have looked upon baby-seal-bludgeoning-cudgels on do-it-yourself shops and thought of saving up for one, on countless occasions. And the reason has been, yes, PC configuration, but mostly, Steam.
Steam should be listed as a prime nemesis in the list of "Prime Nemesis of Earth" by Green Peace, since it may very well be the main reason of baby seal bashing globally.
My first experience, the very very very first experience with Steam: An inoperable game seating besides this computer I write from. Mocking me with every second it passes from the point 3 years ago when I tried to install it to have... fun. The game was not even a new one. It was a game that every computer in the world right now, and maybe even some mobile phones, should be able to play without the tiniest most feminine and delicate hiccup. Half-Life... ONE. The first HL. The one from some 10 years ago.
After 4 or 5 days of f(ish)ing around with the Steam support team for the problem I finally gave up. By then I should've finished the game and be smoking the post-coital cigarette of a well done job on a game well played. Instead I was still fighting with the chaperone Steam team trying to make them let go of MY game so I could have a time alone with it and play it whenever I wanted. Maybe if I was into SM I could have enjoyed 5 or more days of punishing and unresolving emailing as a sort of foreplay.
Alas! I am not and the chaperones won. My incomplete game (the disc only includes 98% of the game, the rest you must download and install from Steam) still rests near my computer to remind me of never forgetting (nor forgiving).
Choosing to use Steam is fine (up to anyone's free will), but being forced to use it as they did when they sold me 98% of a game, that is not.
We have to ask now... How many more times do you think I was tempted on buying anything from that service, if they could not even make that game work on my well kept, well maintained computer?
Fortunately for the baby seals, the answer is: not many more.
Note: At the present time I own no weapon for infant otariidae ursinus-bashing.
Console gamers, answer me this:
How am I suppose to prove how enormously large my ePeen is if everyone's gaming system was identical, huh?
How am I suppose to prove how enormously large my ePeen is if everyone's gaming system was identical, huh?
Could you write them down please?MaxPowers666 said:
Maybe they are the cause why your PC isn't that good and why SC2 doesn't works well with you. My processor is actually the minimum required, and it's 2gb for windows 7 and Vista.
chuckwendig said:You are much wiser than I.RhombusHatesYou said:
In fact, you're probably stealing my PC parts while I nap.
I deserve it, admittedly.
Of course I'm stealing parts. I'm Australian, it's what I do.
I did leave a taipan in the case in exchange for the parts.
I'm not even going to read all the replies to this thread, I can guess what they say. I disagree with you totally but kudos for having the balls to say it.
Unless you just happen to love getting abusive emails, in which case get help
Unless you just happen to love getting abusive emails, in which case get help
Hahaha good response, but I didn't mean that you were stupid, just that you weren't interested in your PC so you don't look after it properly. To use your car analogy, if you want it to run smooth and comfortable all the time, buy something simple that you can have serviced every couple of years. If cars are your hobby, buy something nice that you tinker with and maintain yourself - someone who can't identify and maintain the majority of what is under the hood isn't really a petrolhead.chuckwendig said:
Roflmao! Man that totally sounds like an awesome time hahaha.chuckwendig said:
Sir u need to write more articles for the escapist
Hmm, well it was just a suggestion on the mic. But you said EVERYONE ELSE seemed to have trouble with they mics... I still hear muffled mics on L4D... I assume they are like how I used to be. I.e. you could have a great mic, but that won't make everyone else's mics any better. Also, I have found terrible chat on the time I spent paying 360 online, it's like a racist 13 year old shouting down a drainpipe.chuckwendig said:
It's a shame these difficulties seem to get to you so badly. But remember what I wrote on building your PC: time spent building your own is time saved dealing with PC assembler (Dell) bullshit.
I don't want this to turn into an iWorld where everything is locked down, dumbed down and controlled for "our convenience". Look how Steve Jobs releases the iPad in competition with netbooks... only arbitrarily removes Flash support.
I know we don't sew out own clothes, but dammit what is stopping you? You could if you wanted to. Like I don't know, sew back on a button yourself rather than having to go to a tailor or buy a new one? Because ANYONE can sew a shirt, that allows a much more open and dynamic market. OK, this shirt-PC-gaming analogy is tortured enough.
I don't like console gaming because it is fundamentally bad for business. It is walled garden economics, it exploits the consumers and the developers in favour of the all powerful console seller who control the network and all the games on it and all the users too. It harms creativity and competition.
Anyway, forgot to say: great article. Very thought provoking, I don't find it offensive, though I still would like to understand more about WHY you get so angry at PC gaming in general because Games for Windows Live AGAIN screws you over. I mean what other things inspire such barely containable anger in you? I need a frame of reference because though you have described how your anger came about, things like that never get me that angry.
Excellent article, spot on in every way. Im an avid PC gamer but Im slowly switching to consoles for gaming needs; I have a relatively high-end PC but still get plauged with these lovely issues and like the author's dad said theres an expectation for this stuff to just work when you're coughing up so much dough.
Theres some games that I have to play on PC though but I feel thats more out of habit. FPS games for example to me _have_ to be played on a keyboard and mouse in front of a monitor. Trying to play them on a console gamepad a few feet away from a tv just doesnt feel as right.
Theres some games that I have to play on PC though but I feel thats more out of habit. FPS games for example to me _have_ to be played on a keyboard and mouse in front of a monitor. Trying to play them on a console gamepad a few feet away from a tv just doesnt feel as right.
That's entirely fair -- but I actually do maintain my PC pretty diligently. (My car, ehhh, maybe not as much as I should.) That's my point, despite diligently attending to the Care And Feeding Of The Common Household Desktop Computer, I still run into issues.Sikachu said:
It may be because I have Dell or because of ATI, but it's not user error -- it's not something I'm doing. I'm actually an ex-systems admin. I'm not a computer genius, but I'm not a brick-brained bucket-head, either.
-- Chuck
This statement mirrors my thought process when reading that article.Sikachu said:
I mean, what did that article explain to me, other than "you're really bad with PCs" and that GFWL caused most of those problems and is a plague upon mankind that I hope dies soon?
But yeah, every time I hear tales like this, my first reaction is to wonder how so much can go wrong.
Crysis has always worked fine for me. Except when (using XP) I installed two sets of drivers for my GPU and everything went to hell. Luckily, Windows 7 sorts stuff out automatically, so PC gaming is getting easier.
Also, Fallout 3 exists on PC for mods.
By the way, Saints Row 2 is a shitty port that makes me want to go full fanboy on console gamers.
To sum up in one phrase: PCs go wrong?
Mmm, you bought it already built, isn't that right?MaxPowers666 said:
That normally isn't such an issue, but I always recommend building up your own computer, as it lets you customize it with your price range and normally it's cheaper than buying an already built one. But still it's no slouch either.
I tend to build my own computers, specially because the last time I bought one already built, it was lacking the Graphic Card socket.
I keep telling people, it's a gypsy curse. They don't just do wasting diseases and having people dragged off to hell, you know.Sebenko said:
A mate of mine ran over a gypsy's dog and now he can't get mobile phone reception anywhere.
Thanks for the comment!Treblaine said:
My anger is dialed up for purposes of humor (the week's issue is, of course, called COLD DARK HEART). But I do feel a sense of frustration that things don't necessarily work like they should -- whether it's the Dell, Fallout 3, video drivers, whatever. Something's falling down on the job, and I promise, it's not me. Despite the happy image of me wearing a football helmet and head-butting my PC while gumming up the vents with sticky jam-fingers, I'm not actually a moron. I just don't have the patience or time anymore to address this kind of technical snafu.
-- Chuck