8 Ways to Make Vampires Realistic

[Rhykker]

8 Ways to Make Vampires Realistic

Can we make a biologically believable vampire?

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[Falterfire]

But... Why? What is the point? I mean, yes, you can hedge some numbers in order to getting a theoretically possible vampire-like creature that doesn't obviously contradict any scientific laws, but in doing so you remove most of the reasons to have vampires in the first place. After all the changes you've made, you no longer have an interesting creature. You just have a buff serial killer cannibal with a pale complexion and some night vision goggles.

What story purpose is served by explaining the biology behind a horror monster? A good chunk of fear comes from the unknown, and around the time you've charted the entire digestive system and scientifically classified the medical illnesses the creature suffers you've turned what was a mysterious terror of the night into a routine obstacle to be overcome.

 

[kailus13]

Or we could just say they're magic. This can lead to fun things like flying and being ridiculously flammable for no particular reason.

 

[The_Darkness]

I like. Reminds me of a tv program called "The Last Dragon" which had an anthropologist discovering a (fairly) scientifically plausible body of a dragon.

However, your vampires are still lacking one particular aspect common to the mythology - you haven't given them a reason to live in stormy castles and attempt to seduce any guests that come by... (Though that could just be a cultural thing I guess...)

EDIT:
Pretty sure that "The Strain" starts off as scientifically plausible with decent explanations, but eventually runs into stuff that is more magical - flight, psychic communication and an inability to cross water. This is from reading the book though, don't know if the TV series will be exactly the same.

 

[Thunderous Cacophony]

snip

I think you might have missed the point of the article, namely that there is no point; this is just a silly thought experiment to see if vampires are theoretically biologically possible. That's why some of the answers (Like immortality and regeneration) are little more than shrugs and, "It happens somewhere in nature," without trying to come up with hard scientific theory. He's not advocating their use, or disregarding magical vampires as appropriate monsters.

However, your vampires are still lacking one particular aspect common to the mythology - you haven't given them a reason to live in stormy castles and attempt to seduce any guests that come by... (Though that could just be a cultural thing I guess...)

Biological urges and basic reasoning encourage them to go to places with less sunlight (like Romania? I don't know the weather there), they like old castles because they are safe refuges, and they seduce people because that's a smart hunting strategy (much easier to lure occasional prey then to attack each target by force, especially when dealing with a pack animal like humans).

Spoiler: Still trying to work out the evolutionary advantage of this.

For full effect.

 

[Remus]

So essentially these biologically plausible vampires would be very close, if not identical, to the creatures seen in "The Descent". They are albinos, spend all of their time in the dark so all their senses are fine-tuned for that environment, and their physiology predates homosapiens, which would grant them increased strength and an instinctive ferocity that modern man has lost. Plus they eat meat, all kinds of meat whether it be deer, raccoon, or humans in deep caving gear that may wander into their lair.

 

[Nuxxy]

However, your vampires are still lacking one particular aspect common to the mythology - you haven't given them a reason to live in stormy castles and attempt to seduce any guests that come by... (Though that could just be a cultural thing I guess...)

Biological urges and basic reasoning encourage them to go to places with less sunlight (like Romania? I don't know the weather there), they like old castles because they are safe refuges, and they seduce people because that's a smart hunting strategy (much easier to lure occasional prey then to attack each target by force, especially when dealing with a pack animal like humans).

Luring prey is not unheard of in nature - see the Anglerfish. It would make Twilight a whole lot better if Edward's diamond body was used to lure teenage girls with beautiful sparklies.

Picking off lonesome hiking visitors is also good practice - they won't be missed, like picking off stragglers from the heard.

 

[Gregory Wollf]

As interesting as this article is, it kind of misses the point. The vampire is by its very essence a supernatural being infused with evil.

 

[JennAnge]

Luring prey is not unheard of in nature - see the Anglerfish. It would make Twilight a whole lot better if Edward's diamond body was used to lure teenage girls with beautiful sparklies.
.

That's a version of Twilight that I would actually have read/watched.

One more detail to add to the Wiki entry of Homo Vampiris would be 'low birthrates', otherwise an immortal regenerating creature would eventually overwhelm the prey populations it had evolved to feed on. We'd never have gotten to six billion people on the planet if we'd have progressively more predators feeding off our small prehistoric tribes at a rate of several individuals per year pear predator. Or else their hibernation and reproduction cycle would have to be on a thirty, fifty year or centennial basis.

Then the interesting question would be how they would handle modern society, where their food source and natural habitat has suddenly and radially altered. Secrecy would now be paramount, as we could easily wipe them out if they came to light by modern weaponry and sheer numbers if it came to that, yet the ways they could be discovered via cameras and detective work of their feeding sites would increase. I see vampires pushed to the edges of our societies, their numbers at risk. I can hear David Attenborough commenting the documentary already...

 

[Thyunda]

However, your vampires are still lacking one particular aspect common to the mythology - you haven't given them a reason to live in stormy castles and attempt to seduce any guests that come by... (Though that could just be a cultural thing I guess...)

Biological urges and basic reasoning encourage them to go to places with less sunlight (like Romania? I don't know the weather there), they like old castles because they are safe refuges, and they seduce people because that's a smart hunting strategy (much easier to lure occasional prey then to attack each target by force, especially when dealing with a pack animal like humans).

Luring prey is not unheard of in nature - see the Anglerfish. It would make Twilight a whole lot better if Edward's diamond body was used to lure teenage girls with beautiful sparklies.

Picking off lonesome hiking visitors is also good practice - they won't be missed, like picking off stragglers from the heard.

Maybe vampires, being an offshoot of human evolution, would be able to breed with humans, like early man could with Neanderthals and others? Since vampires tend to be quite solitary creatures, or living in covens, they are territorial in terms of space and food unless favouring the protection offered by a powerful alpha male or female. In this way, they might choose to prey on humans to fulfill sexual needs as well as hunger, and perhaps imprison the impregnated human for the duration of the pregnancy. Then if the baby is vampiric, they'd likely raise it in secret (in case of predators, obviously) and if not, they might just eat it.

In terms of modern vampires, however, their culture would have evolved alongside our own, given our relative similarities and likely mingling, and they would mimic our customs and morals, so a lot of the biologically driven actions might well be replaced simply by our own societal constraints. Why would a vampire want to take a human wife? Because they're naturally predisposed against their own kind, with the exception of a hierarchy dictated by whatever hierarchies solo animals can find themselves dictated by.

 

[Megalodon]

Maybe vampires, being an offshoot of human evolution, would be able to breed with humans, like early man could with Neanderthals and others? Since vampires tend to be quite solitary creatures, or living in covens, they are territorial in terms of space and food unless favouring the protection offered by a powerful alpha male or female. In this way, they might choose to prey on humans to fulfill sexual needs as well as hunger, and perhaps imprison the impregnated human for the duration of the pregnancy. Then if the baby is vampiric, they'd likely raise it in secret (in case of predators, obviously) and if not, they might just eat it.

As we're trying to be realistic here, that's not how genetics works. There wouldn't be any 'ifs' in such a circumstance, the offspring would be a hybrid. Assuming breeding is even possible, the amount of genomic changes for this 'realistic' vampire would most likely render them completely incapable of reproduction with humans.

You wouldn't get H. vampiris or [H. sapiens]. Best case scenario, Blade-esque Daywalker, worst case scenario an albino cannibal cripple. Most likely scenario, some sterile Liger-style creature. All of these circumstances do not help propagate the vampire species, all that would likely do is slowly spread the more advantageous vampire traits (strength, healing) through the human population (assuming any of the hybrids are fertile).

 

[seiler88]

Why can't we just go back to when vampires were just sources of loot and XP?

 

[Bke]

snip, again

I quite often enjoy watching a sci-fi movie or reading on monsters etc. and trying to imagine how such things might be possible. Indeed in high school my friends and I did this very subject for a science project. I see this as more of a tangential learning experience: in one decidedly cool monster lies the opportunity for one to learn dozens of things in a very interesting context, which is actually, I feel, the point of this article.

No doubt this does degrade the horror of the vampire but I would say that this was first accomplished around the 90's when "interview with a vampire" was published, and has been descending since.

On a side note I could perhaps contrive a manner in which a vampire would have supernatural powers and still be scientifically tenable. I point to the "laundry files" series by Charles Stross, which presents some interesting possibilities resultant from some conclusions in string theory. I do highly recommend this, I got a physics boner from it.

 

[SonOfVoorhees]

I liked the Near Dark vampires. I think the worse thing ever i hate in vampire movies are when they hiss. Hate that.

 

[Thyunda]

Maybe vampires, being an offshoot of human evolution, would be able to breed with humans, like early man could with Neanderthals and others? Since vampires tend to be quite solitary creatures, or living in covens, they are territorial in terms of space and food unless favouring the protection offered by a powerful alpha male or female. In this way, they might choose to prey on humans to fulfill sexual needs as well as hunger, and perhaps imprison the impregnated human for the duration of the pregnancy. Then if the baby is vampiric, they'd likely raise it in secret (in case of predators, obviously) and if not, they might just eat it.

As we're trying to be realistic here, that's not how genetics works. There wouldn't be any 'ifs' in such a circumstance, the offspring would be a hybrid. Assuming breeding is even possible, the amount of genomic changes for this 'realistic' vampire would most likely render them completely incapable of reproduction with humans.

You wouldn't get H. vampiris or [H. sapiens]. Best case scenario, Blade-esque Daywalker, worst case scenario an albino cannibal cripple. Most likely scenario, some sterile Liger-style creature. All of these circumstances do not help propagate the vampire species, all that would likely do is slowly spread the more advantageous vampire traits (strength, healing) through the human population (assuming any of the hybrids are fertile).

Would it? Our ancestors were different enough to the Neanderthals to be considered different species, yet those hybrids were pretty lively.

 

[Nieroshai]

So essentially these biologically plausible vampires would be very close, if not identical, to the creatures seen in "The Descent". They are albinos, spend all of their time in the dark so all their senses are fine-tuned for that environment, and their physiology predates homosapiens, which would grant them increased strength and an instinctive ferocity that modern man has lost. Plus they eat meat, all kinds of meat whether it be deer, raccoon, or humans in deep caving gear that may wander into their lair.

Thence we have ghouls. Vampires are quite specific things. Blood is nonnegotible.

 

[CrazyGirl17]

Fascinating. I'm actually thinking of writing an urban fantasy story, maybe I could incorporate some of these ideas?

(Though my take on the "aversion to garlic" thing is that a vampire's enhanced senses can't take the pungent garlic scent, That'd work, right?)

 

[michael87cn]

The truth is they need to/be:

1. Powerful.

2. Undead.

3. Scary.

4. Intelligent.

5. Night owls.

6. Feed on blood.

Obey these 6 things and you can do whatever you want with them.

 

[Megalodon]

Would it? Our ancestors were different enough to the Neanderthals to be considered different species, yet those hybrids were pretty lively.

Is it known that Human-Neanderthal pairings produced fertile offspring?
Even if that case could produce fertile offspring. The differences between a Human and a Neanderthal would be positively petty compared to the differences between these vampires and humans, the digestive alterations alone would likely be enough to categorise the vampires as a different genus to humans, so we'd probably be lookiong at V. vampiris rather than H. vampiris


And yes, extended 'vampire'/hybrid-human breeding (the most common of the possible variations, given the relative population size and limited social groupings of vampires, and assumiong such pairings are possible) would realistically result in a diffusion of 'vampiric' traits as generations passed, as the amount of 'vampire' genes would essentially be diluted every breeding with more human ones. Only vampire-vampire pairings would propagate full vampires, and given the retaliative likelihood of pairings, the end result would either be a moratorium on interbreeding, or the vampires would simply be out-bred.

Plus of course, if such a human predator existed during our species infancy, then they would've most likely either prevented Humanity becoming the dominant species on the planet, stalling development at the hunter gatherer tribal level. Or been hunted to extinction in reprisal, because if there's one thing humans are good at, its hunting things to extinction.

 

[Caffiene]

Would it? Our ancestors were different enough to the Neanderthals to be considered different species, yet those hybrids were pretty lively.

We get a bit funny about it with humans, because we like to think we're special, but generally speaking one of the most major definitions for a species is a group which can interbreed. If we could interbreed successfully with Neanderthals they would most correctly be a sub species (Homo sapiens neanderthalensis) rather than a species.

It seems likely that our ancestors interbred with neanderthals, but the question is are we enough like out ancestors that modern humans could do the same.