Martha vs. Mama: It's Kitchen Klobberin' Time

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
45,698
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Martha vs. Mama: It's Kitchen Klobberin' Time


Sparks are flying as Majesco [http://www.majescoentertainment.com/] has announced a new videogame development deal with Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia Inc., prompting observers around the world to ask: Is this kitchen really big enough for two Cooking Mamas?

Under the terms of the deal, Majesco, the company that over the years has brought us such smash hits as Martha Stewart Living's [http://www.jillianmichaels.com/jillian-michaels-nintendo-wii/fitness-ultimatum-2010.aspx] "expansive portfolio of award-winning lifestyle content." They're thrilled, Martha's confident, gamers will be delighted, etc.

Everyone seems happy with the deal, in fact, except for one person: Cooking Mama. The original videogame kitchen queen is "really pissed off," according to anonymous insiders, over what she sees as an attempt to muscle in on her exclusive media market. While the specifics of Stewart's deal with Majesco are unknown, rumors that Mama was flown in to northern California by private jet for discussions with an unnamed, competing publisher have begun to surface.

In an attempt to capitalize on the heat while it still has both lifestyle celebrities under contract, Majesco has announced the development of an all-new videogame franchise entitled Martha vs. Mama: Kitchen Kombat, in which the dueling doyennes square off in bloody, one-on-one virtual battle. The new game will include 12 unique levels based on famous kitchens from around the world, complex combat mechanics and special power-ups including double-edged cleavers, dual-wielded melon ballers and an innovative "Call a Friend" option in which Martha pays a few buddies from the pen to come over and rough up Mama's husband. No release date has been set.

(Disclaimer: Everything in the preceding post beyond the fact that Majesco has signed a deal to make Martha Stewart videogames may or may not be entirely made up. But come on, Martha vs. Mama? You know you want it.)


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SeanTheSheep

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Jun 23, 2009
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I think that the Martha Stewart game will ultimately fail outside of North America, because to my knowledge, nobody else cares about her, but Cooking Mama has no ties to any country other than Japan, which mothers and children don't care about, whereas a hatred of you yankee-doodles is embedded in near enough every being outside of the Americas.

(Diclamer: Everything in the above post may not be an actual representation of facts, except the part about Martha Stewart's game not doing to well.)
[sub]Must... Resist... Claiming "First"...
*ties self up and gags self*[/sub]
 

RaineHero

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Mar 19, 2010
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I just wanted to comment on the "Cooking Mama Kills Animals" screenshot you took, but I guess I'll have to throw in my 2 cents as well(jerks).

This seems like an attempt to popularize Cooking Mama in North America. "Were you interested in Cooking with Marta Stewart but didn't feel like it was up to snuff? Try Cooking Mama, our other, better game about the exact same thing!"

Edit: Oh right, the comment on the ss. I found butchering the turkey a lot more fun than all the tofu crap(sorry to any vegetarians/vegans I DEEPLY offended on the site ;) ).
 

Cherry Cola

Your daddy, your Rock'n'Rolla
Jun 26, 2009
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I'm on Martha's side on this one.

I hope you burn for what you did to Gary, Cooking Mama! I hope you burn in the oven...

Of hell!
 

Jared

The British Paladin
Jul 14, 2009
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Nuuuu! Cooking mama only! Albeit becase I have no idea who Martha is (American?) but, cooking Mama is putting me through my classes! lol
 

Wolfiesden

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Mar 18, 2010
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On a side note, I was at home yesterday (Monday 4/19) replacing a broke water header and saw Martha on the O/L's tv as I was passing through the sunroom to get tools from the shed. Martha was making some sort of lip balm with some other woman (Martha was apparently too cheap to buy Carmex for a buck). What I found humorous and actually did a LOL is that Martha was dressed in a bright orange blouse, oddly, looking like a prison jumpsuit (yea, it was that orange). God you gotta love irony eh? Convicted of trading stocks in a biopharmaceutical company and now is on national TV in a jumpsuit orange blouse making lip balm. Anything's possible in America.
 

Sir Kemper

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Jan 21, 2010
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Mama better be careful, Martha's been to prison.

She knows how to cut'a *****...




Into a lovely table cosey.
 

MissGinaKid

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Mar 16, 2010
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I'm probably the only actual Cooking Mama fan here. I know it's not that great a game and it's demening that they think the only games girls will like is one about cooking. But Mama is way more entertaing then Martha Stewart. GO MAMA!
 

Bobkat1252

The Psychotic Psyker
Mar 18, 2008
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MissGinaKid said:
I'm probably the only actual Cooking Mama fan here. I know it's not that great a game and it's demening that they think the only games girls will like is one about cooking. But Mama is way more entertaing then Martha Stewart. GO MAMA!
While I'm not a fan of the cooking mama games, I think that the vast majority of people here like the character of cooking mama. There's been so many hilarious things done using her as a character (D.A., that PETA game) that we all find her humorous. So I too support cooking mama in this "competition" against Martha.
 

zamble

We are GOLDEN!
Sep 28, 2009
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SeanTheSheep said:
I think that the Martha Stewart game will ultimately fail outside of North America, because to my knowledge, nobody else cares about her, but Cooking Mama has no ties to any country other than Japan, which mothers and children don't care about, whereas a hatred of you yankee-doodles is embedded in near enough every being outside of the Americas.

(Diclamer: Everything in the above post may not be an actual representation of facts, except the part about Martha Stewart's game not doing to well.)
[sub]Must... Resist... Claiming "First"...
*ties self up and gags self*[/sub]
Martha... who??

OT: Go cooking mama, go!
I'm astonished to know there's a game about babysitting. I imagie it on the wii, with motion controls, always wanted to try to amke a wimote sleep...
 

8bitlove2a03

Senior Member
Mar 25, 2010
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I ask myself, "who would pay for a Martha Stewart game?"

Then I realize how well mindless sims always sell. Sims like Nintendogs, Japanese dating games, sports games in general, and The Sims.

Then I weep for the lost glory of the gaming industry.
 
Mar 26, 2008
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MissGinaKid said:
I'm probably the only actual Cooking Mama fan here. I know it's not that great a game and it's demening that they think the only games girls will like is one about cooking. But Mama is way more entertaing then Martha Stewart. GO MAMA!
You're not the only one! Mama has taught me some awesome recipes.
To quote something I read somewhere "Fvck Martha Stewart".
 

DoW Lowen

Exarch
Jan 11, 2009
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I wonder if she'll teach us to queef using ribbons, confetti and stardust. Hooray for obscenity!

EDIT: Just in case I get into trouble, yest it's a south park reference.