An evil magic baby suddenly births out of you; what would you do with it and what would you name it?

[Doclector]

Eat it. To gain it's power, ofcourse, BOY-O!

That is how I read it, in atlas' voice.

As for me,

Get some healing for the massive hole it just managed to force in my male body.

then, probably take it to a top secret facility and raise it as a force for good under the name Hellboy.

 

[Barbas]

I am uncertain as to how to proceed. I could either:

A) Do my civic duty and submit said demon to the SCP Foundation for analysis and containment.
B) Cryogenically freeze it, since I'm not really ready for the responsibility of raising a creature of Hell right now.
C) Do my very best to raise the child and teach it to be good, selfless and noble. For what is a greater achievement than an evil creature changing its nature?

 

[Level 7 Dragon]

I would forget about the baby and think how was it possible to give birth as a male.

It's kinda scary, knowing that the first person it might use its magic on is on you. Honestly, I am as scared that it would want breastfeeding as it might want to turn anything around it in to ash.

If that is put away with, I'd call him Mike. Mikki if its a girl.

 

[FPLOON]

What about you guys?

Well, that's the thing, innit? I'M A GUY! WTF is this baby doing, coming outta' my ass?!

Either...
A: You're a seahorse
B: You're Cosmo
C: You're fertile
D: All of the Above

OT: Expect some crying for the next few years... It would be a mixure of tears of joy and tears of sorrow...
I know, somehow, this child of mine is destined to betray me and we would have to do battle to see who's the most powerful...

Until then, my baby will be baptized into the Order of Wizards...

 

[Johnny Impact]

Drown it. Never refer to it except in my head, where it will be referred to as "that awful thing that made me feel like I was in a Twilight Zone episode." It wouldn't live long enough to get a name.

 

[nyankaty]

Depends on the type of evil it is. Is it going to eventually try to kill me if I keep it with me? Well, I'll probably leave it on someone else's doorstep unless there's any possibility that it'd come back to find me, then I'd probably turn it into baby veal chili.

But would it grow up loving and respecting me as its parent and I could use its evil to my advantage? Well then I would keep that baby and raise it and eventually use it as a tool to take over the world.

I would name it Nathan Scott Phillips because that's Latin for warm.