My parents treat me like a kid. When they go out, I can't go up and down the stairs to exercise or use the oven, because I might get hurt. I'm 21 years old. I also can't answer the phone unless it's them or my sister I think the do this because I had a brain injury at birth.
Being treated like a kid.
- Thread starter VG_Addict
- Start date
When I was younger, I used to wonder "when will people stop treating me like a kid," and then I realized the answer: when I stopped acting like a kid. If you're 21 years old, your parents have absolutely zero legal control over you. You're on your own, unless something about your behavior is still acting childish around them.
You don't have to let them treat you as a child. Say, "listen, I'm going to use the stove because I'm over two decades old. If you have a problem with that, let's sit down and talk about this like adults."
At that age your parents shouldn't be able to "make" you do anything, so I strongly suspect something about your behavior is not acting "like an adult."
You don't have to let them treat you as a child. Say, "listen, I'm going to use the stove because I'm over two decades old. If you have a problem with that, let's sit down and talk about this like adults."
At that age your parents shouldn't be able to "make" you do anything, so I strongly suspect something about your behavior is not acting "like an adult."
Yeah, you're gonna have to specify that brain injury OP. I have one myself (epilepsy) which limits me to a certain extent as well.
How exactly can they stop you from using stairs when they're not home? How do you stop someone from using stairs in general? You know what you gotta do OP? YOU CLIMB THOSE STAIRS! CLIMB THEM LIKE YOU'VE NEVER CLIMBED BEFORE! CRUSH THOSE STAIRS UNDER YOUR IRON WILL!
But seriously if you're 21 and can operate a computer with the level of skill you've displayed why not just say "I'm 21 and it's a little weird I need permission to use stairs."
Fucking stairs man... come on...
But seriously if you're 21 and can operate a computer with the level of skill you've displayed why not just say "I'm 21 and it's a little weird I need permission to use stairs."
Fucking stairs man... come on...
Your parents are either justified i.e you have a history of falling down stairs, burning yourself in the oven or people haven taken advantage of you on the phone before etc, hence they want to protect you, or they're being super over protective. We won't know which one it is though unless you give more details, which I realize might be something that you're uncomfortable about doing. So only you will know which scenario is applicable to yourself.
If it's the case that there is a genuine reason then I can understand you're frustrated, but then your family are doing it to keep you safe; you see this a lot in medical profession. For example nurses will often use these:
To stop sedated/confused patients from removing drips and catheters etc; sure it's restrictive but if the patient doesn't know better they could really hurt themselves and have a negative affect on their health, and they're only used if there is a prior history.
Having said that though you seem to realize that those things are dangerous, so it could very well be the case that your family is overeating. If you think so then you should confront them about it in a calm and mature way; shouting won't get you anywhere and will only reaffirm their child like image of you; kids throw tantrums, teenagers rant and rave, adults talk, it doesn't necessarily happen that way but that's the image people have. I'd also start by buttering them up a bit too; people are more likely to be cooperative if you agree with a part of their argument.
So say something like "Look I know you guys care about me, and I really appreciate that you don't want me to get hurt, but I think you're overeating a bit and it's really frustrating and hurting me; I feel like I'm a prisoner in my home, and if you really love me you'll give me a bit more freedom, and if you're still worried at least let me prove that I can do these things on my own (with supervision like a trial run at first) and if I'm okay I can do it by myself."
That's what I'd go with.
Hope everything works out.
If it's the case that there is a genuine reason then I can understand you're frustrated, but then your family are doing it to keep you safe; you see this a lot in medical profession. For example nurses will often use these:
To stop sedated/confused patients from removing drips and catheters etc; sure it's restrictive but if the patient doesn't know better they could really hurt themselves and have a negative affect on their health, and they're only used if there is a prior history.
Having said that though you seem to realize that those things are dangerous, so it could very well be the case that your family is overeating. If you think so then you should confront them about it in a calm and mature way; shouting won't get you anywhere and will only reaffirm their child like image of you; kids throw tantrums, teenagers rant and rave, adults talk, it doesn't necessarily happen that way but that's the image people have. I'd also start by buttering them up a bit too; people are more likely to be cooperative if you agree with a part of their argument.
So say something like "Look I know you guys care about me, and I really appreciate that you don't want me to get hurt, but I think you're overeating a bit and it's really frustrating and hurting me; I feel like I'm a prisoner in my home, and if you really love me you'll give me a bit more freedom, and if you're still worried at least let me prove that I can do these things on my own (with supervision like a trial run at first) and if I'm okay I can do it by myself."
That's what I'd go with.
Hope everything works out.