Best Bathroom Scribbles

[Hey Joe]

You know when you're in a public bathroom and you see words of wisdom and insight that go beyond "For a good time call 555-SEXUALHEALING"? This thread is for sharing those words of wisdom of humour you may have seen.

For example, I saw one that said "I rooted ya mum" and directly below somebody replied "Dad, you're drunk".

This one's for the Aussies "Australia Sux" and below "New Zealand 5"

 

[SpiderLotus]

I saw one that said "fuck the illuminati" with a picture of the all seeing eye underneath it.

In that same stall was a conversation going on between what must have been 6 different people.
"I like boobs"
"I think I do too"
"boobs are nice"
"who has the best boobs at pratt?"
"I dunno! Wah I'm sad!"
"GAZONGAS!"
"sweaterpuppets"

Pratt was my old college. I used to follow this graffiti convo every week.

 

[L.B. Jeffries]

If you go to a small town bar in Sewanee, TN there is a place called Shenanigans. When you sit in the guy bathroom urinal, if you look up at the ceiling, written on the ceiling is "STOP LOOKING HERE AND PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU'RE DOING!!!"

I've driven across 38 states and lived out of my car for several months on the road. I never saw anything that topped that.

 

[L.B. Jeffries]

hmmm....replace sit with 'standing at the guy urinal'.

 

[qbert4ever]

Well, there are the generic ones that are everywhere, such as "here I sit, broken harted, tried to shit, only farted" or "here I sit, at a loss, I had too much taco sauce. when it comes, I hope and pray, that I dont blow my ass away."

However the two best ones that I have seen are:

in the mall bathroom stall: And then, the Archangel Michael decended from the heavens, down forth into your stall, to inform you that you have been blessed, with the HOLY SHIT.

At a camp outhouse(anybody that's been to an outdoor camp should know the type, wood, no plumbing save for the giant pit that all the "waste" goes into): In the urinal stall, their are two urinals, as you stand at the one on the left, you see a note that says "look up" as you look up you will see more notes that say "keep going" "look right" "little more" "look down" and at the end of your trail, you are reworded with the note informing you that "you're gay"

 

[Knight Templar]

"call this and anoy that gerk"

half crossed out numbers below it

"thats my number"

 

[Spectre7]

Lol those are all good but my favourite is still:

"Some come here to sit and think
Others come to shit and think
but i come here to scratch my balls
and read the writing on the walls"

 

[John Galt]

"Here I sit,
Dropping a log,
Hoping to hell,
The toilet won't clog."

Now this is poetry at it's maniliness.

 

[BigNiceJohn]

Someone had this one in my high school can, it was up there for almost two years.

I was here
before you
straining out
my stinky poo

I beat my meat
when I was done
don't look now
you're in my cum!

There's a public bathroom at City Hall in Toronto that has a dandy as well; I caught my son eating a girl out, I'm so proud. This was surrounded by about a dozen messages of congratulation. Just for fun, I'll take a picture of it when I head to work on Monday. I hope it's still there by then.

 

[defcon 1]

These are funny because it was in 5th grade!

Kid 1: "every time you masturbate, god kills a kitten"

Kid 2: "prepare for extinction!"

I'm in high school now and I swear these things are like another message board

 

[tiredinnuendo]

Shouldn't it be "For a good time, call Jenny 867-5309"?

- J

 

[qaqa1]

Best one ive ever read was

When I was young and had no sense I took a wiz on an electric fence it hurt so bad it stung my balls so i took a dump in my overalls.

 

[Talisker]

Best i ever saw was "piss higher than this and u should join the fire dept" Written about 8ft above the urinal

 

[Haliwali]

Look out, I've got a rare brown trout that needs to be returned to the water.
I'm in High School, so the majority involve something along the lines of "I plowed your father's wife."
Add typos as desired

 

[Knight Templar]

on the back of the door.
"If you have time to read this you need fiber"

 

[Lance Icarus]

When I was working security at my college, I didn't see a lot of toilet writings. I did see a very interesting one. It was really offensive, but at the same time it didn't make sense at all.

Here's a clue. It was about someone confessing his love for eating a certain group of people "with ranch". Is ranch a slang for something? Is there a dark humor joke there that I don't know about? It's bugged me for a while now.

Oh, and I also remember seeing above a urinal "If you're reading this, you're missing."

 

[felltablet]

I have a blog about this, was going to make a book.

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=139359619&blogID=317591980

Take a look.
(ALL PICTURES)