Biggest douchebag NPC's in gaming?

thedoclc

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Maybe not the biggest douchebag, but certainly one who might qualify for absolutely the cattiest, worst thing to say: Aerie from Baldur's Gate II with a male protagonist if both her and Jahira's romances are active. You will have just escaped from imprisonment where Jahira discovers her murdered husband and genuinely wails about his death. Due to video game logic, it's possible her romance arc starts about two days game time after that (tripping flags). This might be excused in storyline by saying her feelings were divided. It is possible that Jahira's husband has been dead less than a week before the two start arguing, and Aerie plays the dead husband card like a venomous witch.

Granted, this entire tangled mess drew plenty of ire for bad writing.

Moira from Megaton in Fallout 3. Go get radiation poisoning for you? Travel into a minefield for you? Otherwise take pointless risks for you? You know, I don't think you're quirky; I think you're goddamn sadist and only pretending to be nice. Were I not a player character who got stronger by taking pointless risks, I'd probably ask the Sheriff to do something about your crazy ass. As it is, crazy video game logic dictates you dispense XP somehow when I comply with your nightmarish requests.

Councilor Udina. The rest of the Council can be forgiven in part because Shepard is an absolute idiot for not assembling proof to present to them. Hey, Shep. Take a few pictures of the proto-Reaper or something. Maybe grab a few witness statements from some of your crew. Pick up the body of one of the Collectors and let a few geneticists working for the Council do whatever your crew did in roughly ten seconds, so they too might realize they are the Protheans. Present them with -something- that lets them think you are rational and not merely an excellent soldier who buys lots of conspiracy theories. Shepard really is acting like crazy Captain Ahab from the Council's point of view. But Udina is...I could not shoot him fast enough.

Yes, I know, everyone hates the Council, but mostly because they're seeing events from Shepard's point of view. It's obvious to the players the Reapers are real. From the Council's point of view, it'd be like discovering one of their agents has a wonky conspiracy mindset, asking them for evidence, and having them fail to deliver.
 

Lazy-Man

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Wow, no one has put her (and him) up yet?

Although you only really get to have proper interaction with her if you install the Restored Content Mod.

Yes, I am talking about Atris -- and Vrook, that gorram yī tuó shǐ.

Now I was a simple Jedi Knight, going about the simple training that one of my order would typically undertake on Coruscant, then I hear of a war on the outer rim, it only made sense that we Jedi provide what help we could for the civilians of the outer worlds. But what do the Council do? "Oh. We just don't think we know enough to help out yet." ... WTF!? Innocent civies were dying at the hand of that savage Mandalore "The Ultimate" and even worse the republic was losing the war quickly, the implored us to join them. But no, not officially we could. So it only made sense that me and some other Jedi Knights banded together to go and join battle with our bretheren in the Republic.

Fast-forward aprroximately a decade or so (and one particular incident on Malachor V), I found myself on Telos, being bitched at by Atris -- as if it wasn't bad enough when they exiled me after the war! She was all like "Meh meh meh, I'm Atris. I'm the last Jedi. Your actions have doomed 5 planets. You shouldn't gone of with Revan. The Mandalorain wars were folly. You're dumb." So you know what I did, punched her right in the fucking face! (Verbally of course). Showed that bish who's boss, then I took her last disciple, and turned her into my follower. HAH!

(Vrook was harder to beat, he kinda bested me with his lightsaber, although It turns out death field and force storm work wonders.)
 

Siege_TF

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Meatspinner said:
Any NPC you have to escort is automatically the worst NPC ever... fact.

But if I have to pick a specific NPC I'd go with claptrap. 90s comic relief character never get old
Funny you should mention Claptrap and Escort NPCs since the two escort missions with Brick in BL2 are a blast. Does Handsome Jack count as an NPC? I mean he's the antagonist, but at least he's not a platter of calamari.
 

bificommander

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I detest Logan significantly more than Traherene. Arogant prick. "Yeah, sure, I blew the mission to vanquish one of the ultimate unbeatable evils plagueing this world and got two allies killed because I wanted to save my favourite piece of ass... but that doesn't mean I should apologize to my surviving allies for anything. It was a perfectly sensible choice. And if I explained any of this, none of them would understand me. No one understands me. Boo-hoo, shame I can't cut myself through this heavy armor."

Also, can I count Batman himself in Arkham City, even though he's technically the PC? Yes, I know Batman has strict rules about not killing. The game's writers couldn't change that and keep their licence. Fine. But if they wanted me on board with it, could they have payed a bit more attention to the message the rest of the game and it's prequel sends? Specifically, the enemy chatter of the mooks reveals one of two things: That they like murder, torture and (if the conversation is about anyone female) rape, and that their bosses are even worse. The prequel demonstrated just how effective therapy was with these criminals (A therapy session that the therapist survives is a good session), and this game shows how effective imprisonments are: Joker arranges a few thousand civilians to be poisoned, just so Batman will be motivated to find a cure for him. Ridler kidnapps and tries to kill half a dozen nurses and doctors to use as bait for Batman. And I'm not even talking about the crap they get up to in the comics.

And yet, when Batman discovers a plot to kill the criminals, he does everything possible to stop it because... because he's Batman. He's Batman, and he can just beat up the criminals while looking cool for the seventy-third time, which must come as a huge relief to the families of victims from this week's murder spree. It wouldn't bother me if Batman showed some sign of weighing the pro's and con's of not just his refusal to kill but preventing everyone else from doing it too. But all he does is look stoic. If there's going to be a sequel (and I still kinda hope there will be, the gameplay was good), have the writers look at Trigun for an example on how to make a 'do-not-kill' hero in a world of brutal criminals work.
 

Lunar Templar

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I present 2 NPC from Vindictus that i want dead, and hate far, far, FAR then you could possibly understand


In addition to being selfish and greedy, he's a womanizer, a coward, and general asshole. the NPC pic of him only makes me want to kill him more.

side note: at level 40, at the end of the 'pact' quest chain, your given the option to become a Dark Knight or Paladin, due to events in the quest your given the option to 'kill' or 'spare' Gallagher. where 'kill' turns you into a Dark Knight and 'spare' into a Paladin.

Paladins are kinda rare .....




Mileage my very here, depending on how much you get invested in Vindictus's story, so he'll ether be 'annoying' or permanently on your shit list. well before the end of EP 8 where he actually tries to kill you, and kills or in responsible for the death of two NPCs whom you've more or less been 'friends' with most the game.

On top of all that, he's a smug, holier then thou ass hole who doesn't think for him self and questions nothing about his orders even when he should
 

Quazimofo

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WWmelb said:
Seconded that this asshole


Way bigger douchebag than

Just a quick thing, funnyjunk.com links never work on the escapist. you can see them, nobody else can.

Im going to go ahead and throw in a vote for the council in mass effect for being dicks. "Look, you just got mindfucked by a beacon and are probably under some stress, these Reaper things are just a myth...... (couple months later) OH SHIT THEY ARE REAL! Thanks for saving us Mr./Ms. Shepard! We owe you our lives! What's that? You want us to take the reapers seriously now? naaaaaaaaah I think we're good." (pulls "I SAVED YOUR FUCKING LIFE, JUST LISTEN TO ME FOR ONCE" card). "Whoah, man, thats not cool. Saving our lives does NOT mean we are inclined to respect your demonstrably reliable intelligence." And they do this in BOTH GAMES before the reapers show up and begin their systematic genocide of EVERYTHING.

But thats more just mind-boogling stupidity and stubbornness. Handsome Jack is the epitome of douchebaggery. His lines were delivered fantastically, and he is really rather funny, but after hearing some of these recordings or conversations... he is just fucking EVIL!
 

XMark

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Princess Gwaelin in the original Dragon Warrior:

Dost Thou Love Me?
> No
But thou must!!

Dost Thou Love Me?
> No
But thou must!!

And so on until you say yes.
 

UrinalDook

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Woah, woah, woah. A thread on gaming's biggest douchebag, and no one has yet to even reference


Well, if that isn't worth ending months of lurking to finally step up, sign up and post, I don't know what is. (So, er, hi everyone)

I don't know whether it was his stupid, douchey face, his awful dialogue or the fact that everything about the character seems to have been written deliberately to annoy you, but Rosh Penin is king of the asshats as far I'm concerned.

Kudos to whoever said Moneybags from Spyro, though. That brought back a lot of forgotten memories and yes, even as a child I hated that asshole.

Edit: Image tags herp derp.
 

kitsunema

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EmperorSubcutaneous said:
Kashrlyyk said:
Kormir from Guild Wars Nightfalls.
I'll one-up that with Trahearne from GW2. He's Kormir with an additional six years of writing experience that apparently went to waste.

Seriously, fuck that guy. He gives sylvari a bad name, and that's terrible.
i miss tybalt already
 

Orange12345

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NO ROMAN I DO NOT WANT TO GO FUCKING BOWLING WITH YOU!!!

yeah that guy, just in terms of how god dam annoying he is
 

Gabanuka

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I think you're all forgetting the classic gaming asshole.

Screw your Cloud District guy!

 

Jynthor

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Terminate421 said:
Kingjackl said:
The Little Lamplight kids from Fallout 3. Yeah, those "child-killer" mods exist for a reason.

Also, Larry from The Walking Dead, especially in the first episode. Fuck that guy.
The instant that

I found a way to kill him, I took it.

Also, Nathan Drake. Fuck that guy.
Yeah Larry was a total dick.

I didn't kill him though, I wasn't about to kill the man in front of his daughter's eyes while he was likely to still be alive.
 

hazabaza1

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aguspal said:
by conection NPC are enemies to, so I guess this could be considerated another "most hated enemy in videogames" thread..
Sorry, what?
Just because a character isn't controlled by the player it's an enemy? Bluh?

OT: Recently that Buck guy from FarCry 3 was a bit of a douche. A fun kind of douche, like Handsome Jack, but still a douche.
Also damn near everything hinted towards him being some sort of hallucination or something which never happened which was a shame, I thought I was being smart when I expected it.
 

aguspal

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hazabaza1 said:
aguspal said:
by conection NPC are enemies to, so I guess this could be considerated another "most hated enemy in videogames" thread..
Sorry, what?
Just because a character isn't controlled by the player it's an enemy? Bluh?
No, maybe I didnt explained myself well but thats not what I meant.


I meant to say than Enemies are, by definition, NPC too. They are controlled by the player so yeah, they are NPC as well. Not that NPC are all enemies. NPC can be friendly and neutral too... Well you know how it goes.


Well anyways it was just something random I noted.
 

hazabaza1

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aguspal said:
hazabaza1 said:
aguspal said:
by conection NPC are enemies to, so I guess this could be considerated another "most hated enemy in videogames" thread..
Sorry, what?
Just because a character isn't controlled by the player it's an enemy? Bluh?
No, maybe I didnt explained myself well but thats not what I meant.


I meant to say than Enemies are, by definition, NPC too. They are controlled by the player so yeah, they are NPC as well. Not that NPC are all enemies. NPC can be friendly and neutral too... Well you know how it goes.


Well anyways it was just something random I noted.
Oh right, I get you now.
I dunno, I guess we could call enemy patterns douche-baggy or somesuch, but it just feels a lot more personal to call out someone on being a **** because of their personality, not how they attack.
 

chozo_hybrid

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Jul 15, 2009
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Arcturus Mengsk, screw that guy.


Having read "I, Mengsk" I do understand more about his character and how he justifies what he does, but still. He gets my number one spot for what he does to his allies in the original Starcraft.
 

Adam Jensen_v1legacy

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This annoying prick: http://elderscrolls.wikia.com/wiki/Nazeem

I killed the idiot. Trapped his soul and used it to enchant my boots. Fucker.
 

aguspal

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hazabaza1 said:
aguspal said:
hazabaza1 said:
aguspal said:
by conection NPC are enemies to, so I guess this could be considerated another "most hated enemy in videogames" thread..
Sorry, what?
Just because a character isn't controlled by the player it's an enemy? Bluh?
No, maybe I didnt explained myself well but thats not what I meant.


I meant to say than Enemies are, by definition, NPC too. They are not controlled by the player so yeah, they are NPC as well. Not that NPC are all enemies. NPC can be friendly and neutral too... Well you know how it goes.


Well anyways it was just something random I noted.
Oh right, I get you now.
I dunno, I guess we could call enemy patterns douche-baggy or somesuch, but it just feels a lot more personal to call out someone on being a **** because of their personality, not how they attack.



Yeah, thats right. As I said before, I just randombly noted that, but for the sake of the thread its better if we take it how you just said.
 

aguspal

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Johnny Novgorod said:
This guy in Spyro 2. No douchebag per se but he was always bad news whenever he had a favor to ask, usually leading to some incredibly painful escort missions.



Random comment: He looks bit like Crash Bandicoot. just a little bit.


EDIT: Fucking Double post. Thats what happended to me when I thougt somebody else would post before me but was too lazy to change pages. LOL