- Aug 28, 2008
ObsidianJones said:You tend to look at my experiences that you freely admit you've never truly experienced yourself, but try to convince me that my history is somehow wrong or that I took the wrong lesson from this.Dreiko said:Ok so, this thing you're talking about isn't fear, it's irrational phobic behavior that's actually the person being afraid being absurd. A form of mental illness basically. It's akin to someone freaking out to the point of crying or having heart palpitations when a spider gets on them (hell, I remember people saying they couldn't play skyrim cause it had spider enemies at some point lol, arachnophobia is real but clearly the digital spider won't harm you in the real world). It's not the normal, average reaction one has when that happens.
I'm not saying there's not some psychologically damaged women out there who'd fear you. I'm just saying that that's highly abnormal and not something you need to take for granted as you go about your life.
Trying to paint a picture where everyone shares your mental issues in order to make whatever troubles you into a group-based issue and not just your personal circumstances that lead you to be this way is not rational either.
I think you're doing this out of kindness, and I can appreciate that. But you have to understand as I just picked a minute fraction of similar feelings here on the internet, and as others on this very forum have expressed similar experiences (one in this very thread)... do you think it's about time you might do some self reflection and understand that you might not have the same similar experiences of people in your living complex, or your neighborhood, or your town or city, your county, your state, and your country? What's "abnormal" for you and yours is other people's 24/7.
And to constantly judge other people's realities to your own short changes everyone, especially yourself.
You're just giving me anecdotes that go against common sense. You can cherrypick people who have issues or ideas everywhere and most people who don't have issues don't write articles or do research about the issues they're not having. Again, I'm not saying there's not some people who'd fear anyone for any reason, including being tall and muscular (in my case I have those traits and also epic metal hair and a very very foreign sounding name haha), I'm just saying that that's really not the default situation and in 99% of cases people are just easygoing and having a good time living life without issue.
If you don't go into a situation predetermined to find how it causes issues, you will find that most situations have no issues to begin with. This is kinda why the notion of microaggressions (this is kind of a tangent but it came to me so I'm going with it haha) is poisonous, because it turns innocuous behavior into maybe-microaggression, where people begin to doubt themselves and whether or not they were being mean in some insane twisted interpretation of their behavior that could still be technically plausible given the infinity of experience.
Just because you can't 100% rule out something doesn't mean that it has a noteworthy chance of actually occurring.