Caught having sex

Lonan

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Dec 27, 2008
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Matthew94 said:
Sean Hollyman said:
Matthew94 said:
Sean Hollyman said:
Matthew94 said:
Sean Hollyman said:
I've never even done it, never even had a girlfiend o_O


We all know that feel bro. We just have to pray things will work out.
It's horrible.

Id like a girlfriend and stuff.


But from what I've seen, they always want attention, and shit.
Yeah, when I get a good job after uni I'll just buy one, I'm sure it will be much easier that way.

I'm sure amazon must sell some of these "female" things.
Nah I've heard bad things about the Amazon ones, things that make your skin crawl.

Try ebay or Play.com instead, better deals. If all else fails..
And after you are done you can sell her on ebay!

That is what this world is missing, a slave trade where people who don't want the hassle of working to get a girlfriend can just buy one.
Unfortunately, the world is not missing that.
 

Don Savik

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Aug 27, 2011
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Coming from a person who has never had a girlfriend but is still completely logical about relationship mindsets.....

Why would you have sex in a house full of people with the doors unlocked? Does the excitement of being caught intrigue you, or are you just plain old stupid? And if it does intrigue you, then why are you ashamed and embarrassed when it happens? It seems like your asking for it to be honest.

Is it that hard to say your going over to a friend's house without telling them which friend? Then go to a motel or something so you don't have to be quiet?
 

Risingblade

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Mar 15, 2010
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Really how hard is it to lock the fucking door? Nobody wants to walk in or be walked in on. Also who the fuck does that while their mother is in the house?
 

Dryk

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Dec 4, 2011
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2HF said:
When I was 16 years old I had my first girlfriend and we made out all the time(Score!). Every time we did her little brother would run to their mom screaming "They're doing S.E.X!!!".
My sister does something like that, but she's 19 and knows she's wrong -_-
 

renegade7

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Feb 9, 2011
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A couple times, mostly with myself =P

Seriously...people...KNOCK.

The one time with another person we weren't actually having sex, I just had my hand in her pants.

captcha: tickle the ivories. Well I was certainly tickling SOMETHING.
 

DANEgerous

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Jan 4, 2012
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I did once, gay sex to. ************ broke my lock to use my bathroom and was absolutely wasted and though i was with a woman and asked to join then told me I was an evil ****** and left... i tracked him down and got the money to fix my door then never saw him again, likely for the best.

Like 20+ people looked in as well as him but they applauded because apparently we make a cute couple.

So there is MY embarrassing story, I think it is the only time I have been found out doing any sort of sex act winch i wish was the same for my father who i have caught masturbating 4 times all FAR more scaring
 

kannibus

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Sep 21, 2009
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I was 15 and having a good time with a young lady who assured me that her old man was away for the evening. Imagine my surprise when I hear the front door open and stomping up the stairs.

Luckily the bedroom door was locked giving me enough time to dive out the window and for her to throw my clothes out after me.

Ah, for the days of silly youth.

However, I did get caught by my inlaws. My newly acquired wife and I, were, in the living room and things were going well. However, the doorbell rings and her mom yells that they're waiting. As such, we whip on our clothes as fast as possible i.e. I throw on my jeans and she pulls on some underwear and my t-shirt.

Answer the door all sweaty and her hair all messed up.

Her Dad: "What the hell?"
Me: "Uh..."
Her: (pissed off like no tomorrow): "We were screwing each other's brains out, what does it look like?"
Me: "..."
 

Just_A_Glitch

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Dec 10, 2009
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Well, a few friends (and the rest of the schoolbus, to be exact) noticed me and my girlfriend getting a little handsy once. And then this other time, the same girl and I were caught doing things behind a tree. Yeah, we weren't all that discreet.
 

game-lover

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Dec 1, 2010
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Don Savik said:
Coming from a person who has never had a girlfriend but is still completely logical about relationship mindsets.....

Why would you have sex in a house full of people with the doors unlocked? Does the excitement of being caught intrigue you, or are you just plain old stupid? And if it does intrigue you, then why are you ashamed and embarrassed when it happens? It seems like your asking for it to be honest.

Is it that hard to say your going over to a friend's house without telling them which friend? Then go to a motel or something so you don't have to be quiet?
Risingblade said:
Really how hard is it to lock the fucking door? Nobody wants to walk in or be walked in on. Also who the fuck does that while their mother is in the house?
Thank fucking God. I'm not alone. I mean, for heaven's sake.
 

II Scarecrow II

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Feb 23, 2011
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Well... It was 2am in the morning and I assumed all my housemates were asleep. When I woke up the next day, turns out two of them heard the entire thing and liberally re-enacted everything they heard to the rest.

I couldn't leave my room for two days for embarrassment.
 

snyper101

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Jul 15, 2011
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Matthew94 said:
Sean Hollyman said:
Matthew94 said:
Sean Hollyman said:
I've never even done it, never even had a girlfiend o_O


We all know that feel bro. We just have to pray things will work out.
It's horrible.

Id like a girlfriend and stuff.


But from what I've seen, they always want attention, and shit.
Yeah, when I get a good job after uni I'll just buy one, I'm sure it will be much easier that way.

I'm sure amazon must sell some of these "female" things.
What, a fleshlight?
 

Apollo45

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Jan 30, 2011
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Erm, I've never actually been caught. I said in a previous thread about having sex on top of an unmuted Xbox mic with a few friends at the other end, but that's about the most of it. We can be goddamned sneaky though. We've had sex in a room with both of her brothers and no one noticed, and I've felt her up while we were playing video games with some of her friends... Hell, she gave me the beginnings of a hand job with her parents sitting next to us on the couch (large quilts are awesome, by the way). The first time I got to second base was sitting on the couch while her brothers played Halo. Still haven't ever been caught. In fact, I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if her mom still thought we were virgins (my mom found a pack of condoms pretty early on, so I don't think she's under that notion).

OctoH said:
Also, my roommate in subsequent years would have sex with me still in the room. Honestly, I didn't care as long as they were not loud enough to bother me with my headphones in. I always had to resist the urge to pop a few brews and say "Cheers!" to them.
Heh, my roommate did that once while I was watching an episode of BSG. I ignored it while it was going on, but as soon as they were done I grabbed a beer from the fridge and tossed it to them. He laughed for about ten minutes, she made me leave while she got dressed. Not that I didn't see her naked in the reflection on my computer... I deliberately turned the screen after that. Watching naked girls is awesome, except when they're having sex with your roommate. Then it gets awkward.

He would later go on to have sex with other girlfriends on the bottom bunk while I was on the top one. I would make a comment every time afterwards (a couple times I gave him high fives, until once he said I might not want to do that. Stopped after that time.)
 

Roggen Bread

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Nov 3, 2010
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OP: Take it with humor.
You see, I know it for a fact, that your mom already had sex.

Also: what the heck is wrong with your families?
I don't have a lock on my door, but people have to fucking knock if my door is closed.

But can't deny it got pretty close on some occasions.
 

Haagrum

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May 3, 2010
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Never been caught having sex, but it's been a very close thing a few times. As bad as a mother's intrusion can be, things get much more frantic embarrassing when the person doing the almost-catching is a police officer...

As far as housemates go - we had standing house rules in a place I lived in to prevent unwelcome arrivals awkwardness. Helped that we were friends going back to our school days. Generally, I'm not fussed if my housemates are going at it hammer and tongs, as long as I can still sleep at night - most people are usually happier and easier to deal with if they're getting laid semi-regularly.

Don Savik said:
Coming from a person who has never had a girlfriend but is still completely logical about relationship mindsets.....

Why would you have sex in a house full of people with the doors unlocked? Does the excitement of being caught intrigue you, or are you just plain old stupid? And if it does intrigue you, then why are you ashamed and embarrassed when it happens?
Logic tends to take a back seat in these things. Frequently, it's the thrill of the risk - the same reason why most people do illogical things for enjoyment. Often, it's lust and the moment. And then, sometimes, it's stupidity.
 

Syzygy23

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Sep 20, 2010
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Matthew94 said:
Sean Hollyman said:
I've never even done it, never even had a girlfiend o_O


We all know that feel bro. We just have to pray things will work out.
God helps those who help themselves.

Which is a fancy way of saying God isn't going to do shit for you, so stop wastin' time on prayers and start taking shots of whiskey until the fear of rejection goes away and you start gettin' some!
 

Eri

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Feb 21, 2009
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Really kind've blows my mind how many people seem to have no problem fucking while their moms or dads are in the house somewhere. Seems a bit...like something you shouldn't be doing.
 

Datsle

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Feb 4, 2009
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Eri said:
Seems a bit...like something you shouldn't be doing.
Thats a quite common turn-on :p

And yes, by a few friends, at a party with a camera. First night with my ex girlfriend, But oh well, we were together for 4 years after that. :)