Cooking Mama: The PETA Version

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
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Cooking Mama: The PETA Version


Mama Kills Animals [http://www.peta.org].

The Thanksgiving holiday in the U.S. is celebrated on the fourth Thursday in November, culminating in a massive, gut-busting, pants-splitting turkey feast. Predictably, PETA has a few issues with the carnivorous aspects of the holiday, and has decided to take advantage of Flash technology and the internet to remind us that there's enough gazpacho for everyone. In Cooking Mama: Mama Kills Animals, players engage in a wide variety of simple mini-games as they prepare the turkey for the big meal, including plucking the feathers, ripping out the guts and hacking off the head.

Like all good games, Cooking Mama: Mama Kills Animals offers bonuses for advancing through the levels, and as befits a true PETA promotion, the very first bonus is a video that includes footage of turkeys crammed together in massive industrial farming operations, being clubbed to death, hung upside down and having their throats slit while they're still alive, all in a very vivid shade of abattoir red. Later bonuses are somewhat less graphic, including things like hi-res Mama Kills Animals wallpaper and a web banner for folks who support the cause.

I'm a pretty big fan of animals myself, and in a broad sense I support a lot of what PETA is trying to accomplish, but I have to admit that despite the grim subject matter this game is nothing short of hilarious. Ramming cartoon stuffing that looks more like a monstrous cat hairball into the gaping arse of a mutilated turkey is a singularly unique experience, and being screamed at by a frenzied, blood-drenched Cooking Mama for not being mean enough to the birds just never gets tired. Unfortunately for PETA, the moralizing does: The moment the game told me Cooking Mama had learned the error of her ways and instructed me to "mash the tofu," I quit.

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Virgil

#virgil { display:none; }
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Jun 13, 2002
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Wow, that's surprisingly well done. I don't think it really communicates everything they're going for, and it definitely has too much "whacko" in it in places (the cracked eggs bleed? Please.) but it's definitely an impressive effort.

I'm a big fan of animals too. Usually at Medium Well.
 

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
45,698
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Virgil said:
it definitely has too much "whacko" in it
This sums up PETA.

They're graduating from the "going overboard" school of propaganda to "the big lie".
 

PedroSteckecilo

Mexican Fugitive
Feb 7, 2008
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Just to confirm, I've got nothing against vegitarians on an individual scale but.

Hey PETA! I LOVE EATING DEAD ANIMALS! Take your self righteousness and shove it up your hipocritical lying pet murdering asses.
 

Royas

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Apr 25, 2008
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I wonder if the makers of Cooking Mama have any intentions of suing the hell out of PETA for what looks very much like a copyright violation. I mean, they are using the name, similar imagery, similar gameplay... it's easy to mistake this for something actually endorsed by the original makers. That looks like a gimme lawsuitt.
 

Galletea

Inexplicably Awesome
Sep 27, 2008
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This looks more fun than the real version. I guess that means it could be a big backfire. It does look like they could have copyright issues there too, but I'm not going to pretend to know anything about those.
 

Anton P. Nym

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Sep 18, 2007
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Bacon.

BaconbaconbaconbaconBACON!

That, more than any lame propagandistic rip-off of Cooking Mama (which should get their sagging glutes sued into the ground, in my opinion), is why I'll never support PETA.

-- Steve
 

NeedAUserName

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Aug 7, 2008
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Virgil said:
Wow, that's surprisingly well done. I don't think it really communicates everything they're going for, and it definitely has too much "whacko" in it in places (the cracked eggs bleed? Please.) but it's definitely an impressive effort.

I'm a big fan of animals too. Usually at Medium Well.
I like mine bloody...
 

dekkarax

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Apr 3, 2008
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I feel like some turkey now, and I don't even celebrate thanksgiving!

Anyone wanna take bets on how crazy PETA's next zany plan to persuade (and I use that term very loosely) us to not eat naturally?
 

Galletea

Inexplicably Awesome
Sep 27, 2008
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Well that was a fun few minutes. I want more levels.
Anyway I think the bleeding eggs and feathers took it beyond a statement into the realms of silliness.
 

AceDiamond

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Jul 7, 2008
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I think the only truly good thing about this is that this opens up a wonderful counterpoint game in the form of "Hamster Mama: Mama eats her own offspring"

Does that make any sense? Not really, but neither does PETA
 

I3uster

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Nov 16, 2008
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I´m actually vegetarian, and i have no problems with meat-eaters as long as they accept what they are doing like you.
what i hate are these hippie-girlie "OMG ANIMALS ARE TREATED CUREL... im hungry lets go to mcdonalds"-flower-meateaters.
 

Hunde Des Krieg

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Sep 30, 2008
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Does PeTA have any idea how nature works? Nature is far more cruel than humanity is. Half of all prey animals in the wild are eaten while they are still partially alive or have to suffer slow horrible deaths. They do realize that the animals we raise for livestock are practically immune from extinction? yes there are many animals that suffer before they are butchered, and those responsible should be punished, these are the animals raised in factory settings. Animals raised outside on natural foods live better lives and taste better too. They are killed quickly and humanely, and help to feed humanity.
 

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
45,698
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Why they didn't combine their various campaigns and make it "Cooking Mama Kills Sea Kittens" is beyond me. Other than it might make people hungry for sea kittens and chips, or poached sea kitten, or even raw sea kitten.
 

I3uster

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Nov 16, 2008
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Hunde Des Krieg said:
Does PeTA have any idea how nature works? Nature is far more cruel than humanity is. Half of all prey animals in the wild are eaten while they are still partially alive or have to suffer slow horrible deaths. They do realize that the animals we raise for livestock are practically immune from extinction? yes there are many animals that suffer before they are butchered, and those responsible should be punished, these are the animals raised in factory settings. Animals raised outside on natural foods live better lives and taste better too. They are killed quickly and humanely, and help to feed humanity.
i dont think that it is cruel to kill animals, but thinks it is cruel how they are held and killed (the WAY of killing matters here)