Escape to the Movies: Battleship

yellowhead

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Nov 18, 2009
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I'm from the UK so I saw this film a few weeks ago, and while i'll never say it was a great film but I felt it was a good popcorn flick. I appreciated the use of tactical warfare as opposed to incoherant explosions and the action was pretty good. Although the story sucked and Liam Neeson was criminally underused.

Great, hell no but I enjoyed it and it had a certain charm to it. But you made a fantastic point about a smart person trying to make a dumb person's product.
 

MovieBob

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Dec 31, 2008
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Battleships, Damn.

Sometimes it's called conventional wisdom for a reason Bob. After seeing The Avengers, this movie must have seemed like it was suffering from Turrets Syndrome.
 

Qitz

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Mar 6, 2011
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Battleship would have been 10,000X better if the bad guys were actually giant red pins that had to strike each other a specific number of times to make them exploderate.

At least then it would be funny.
 

PsychedelicDiamond

Wild at Heart and weird on top
Legacy
Apr 4, 2020
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I'm gonna ask because someone has to:

Which line?

captcha: rose bud. Thank you for reminding me of a good movie, Captcha. You're a bro.
 

WanderingFool

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Apr 9, 2009
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I believe I said when this was first announced, "Oh God... Really?" in a tone of "this movie is gonna suck".

I would like to say I called it, but so did everybody else...
 

ZZoMBiE13

Ate My Neighbors
Oct 10, 2007
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Credit insert 1: We're all concerned about "Beware the Batman" Bob, you are not alone. Looks like they're trying to mix the dark edgy "Animated Series" vibe with the more lighthearted tone and silliness of "Brave and the Bold". Both great shows on their own merits, but not something that should be mixed. Kinda like "Hey, you got chocolate in my Preperation H! No, you got Preperation H in my chocolate!"

Credit insert 2: That is a shame. Truly.
 

LZeroK

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May 25, 2009
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PsychedelicDiamond said:
I'm gonna ask because someone has to:

Which line?

captcha: rose bud. Thank you for reminding me of a good movie, Captcha. You're a bro.
"We sunk their battleship" You know, that boardgame thing.

OT: Uggghhhhh... Not watching this.

Edit: DAMN, Ninja'd by Serenity!
 

StriderShinryu

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Dec 8, 2009
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Actually I'm quite glad it's a failure of a movie and I hope it's a failure at the box office as well.. Forget the counter culture wanting something destined to be bad to actually be good. This was a terrible idea from the get go and the worse a daeth it dies, the better. Potentially clever ideas or nifty execution shouldn't save something with a concept this terrible.. so I'm glad that they don't.

When you're a bad imitation of the Transformers movies.. yeah.. you pretty much have to actively work to be that bad.
 

Dastardly

Imaginary Friend
Apr 19, 2010
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Plot twist: The smallest destroyer ship stays safely tucked right alongside the carrier the whole game--err, movie--and buys the Earth forces just enough time to find the last alien ship, which was crammed in diagonally because the aliens are bad-guy cheaters.

And then we get "the line" -- "I'm sick of these mothaf***n' Battleships on my mothaf***n' coordinate plane!"
 

solidstatemind

Digital Oracle
Nov 9, 2008
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Nice that you answered the one question I had (whether or not the 'zinger' was used), Bob.

And MIB3 might not be complete garbage... at least when compared to this offering (offaling?). You can always do the "WILL... SMITH!" from the 'Shaft Wedding' episode of Fresh Prince of Bel Aire every time he comes on the screen to keep yourself entertained, at least.
 

MovieBob

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Dec 31, 2008
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No comment that the aliens don't start shooting till the US fires first?


(captcha "hear hear")
 

Rad Party God

Party like it's 2010!
Feb 23, 2010
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I'm still very happy after finally getting myself to watch The Avengers yesterday and I'm certainly not interested in watching anything else this month... maybe I'll just watch The Avengers again and wait until Prometheous, The Dark Knight Rises and The Hobbit comes out.