Escape to the Movies: New Moon

Danman1

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Mar 27, 2009
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Went to see this with my friend cause she cried until I did. I slowly turned prison gay thanks to half naked wolf-boys and I realized I hat my friends. Thank you twilight saga!
 

i_am_reaper

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Nov 10, 2009
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Ah yes,,,,new moon...Ok well i took my girlfriend to see it and met somefriends(all girls)there. Well let men start of by saying not a fan of this particular franchise but my girl is along with what seems to be the entire female population. I have seen the 1st one and could have cared less if they had made the second one. Now.....the movie itself wasn't to horrible. One HUGE reason is cuz the "sparkling" dude is missing through like half the movie(always a good thing) and it focuses in on the chick and the wolf dude. It could of been better....much better but it could have also been worse, a lot worse. If u don't like sparkly man there is a scene where he gets his ass handed to him...BAD..Fucking great. I love it. N e ways movie was blah but could of been fucking blah. 1 bad thing.....screaming fan gurls. WTF!
 

Resistance205

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nathan-dts said:
qazmatoz said:
The bleeping is terribly annoying.
Yeah I fucking know. Seriously Escapist stop with the fucking censoring of all the fucking swear words. We're all mature here (with the exception of the people who say first in Yahtzee videos) so stop being a little ***** and let the man swear. I find it pretty weak that that's as much profanity as I can think of to put into this post.

P.S. I sincerely apologise if this isn't actually the Escapists decision and is actually Mr. Bobs decision. In that case, man up you pussy.
It's Bob's I think, all other shows can curse but he just does it for humor I think. Yahtzee said in a podcast one time does The Escapist want him to turn down the language a bit, they replied with a simple email saying "No.". So it's all Bob when it comes to language.
 

AndyFromMonday

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Feb 5, 2009
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New Moon sucked. Did anyone ever tought it was going to be good in the first place giving the shittines of the first movie?

Stephenie Meyer is also full of crap. I can't believe anyone could actually read her "novels" and not feel the need to burn them.
 

Shruikine

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Oct 11, 2009
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Basically said what I tell everyone who tries to tell me it's either
A. Well written (It's £%^&@#> isn't!)
B. Has a good storyline (Vampires that DON'T suck blood?!)

Twilight and all it's sequels are awful. Yes i've read them, and i want that sad part of my life back.

DON'T READ THEM!!
 

RoseBridge

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Oct 27, 2009
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-Zen- said:
RoseBridge said:
DaBozz said:
One word, ditch this shit and watch hellsing if you want REAL vampires.
yeah thats true, but isn't Twilight supposed to be a romance movie? so comparing them doesn't make sense except that their are vampires in both.
I have an alternative: Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust. The relationship between Charlotte and Meier is far deeper and more authentic than the one between Ed and Bella, which is funny considering that it's an action movie, and not a romantic drama.
Again true but thats assuming these people would watch an anime.
 

AliciaPeck

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Nov 4, 2009
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I'm aware, and scrolling through the replies, growing more and more aware that most if not all the people talking about this (movies, books, etc.) are male. And by the very definition of this series being a romance, men are 90% more likely NOT to like it. simple facts...
I don't appreciate the boxes that people are trying to put this movie and this book series in.
As far as the review specifically, you mention Stephenie Meyer's chosen profession, and as I'm sure you haven't done any research on her or the series past reading/bashing them, I'll give you a little insight. Mrs. Meyer's "chosen profession" was stay at home mom. (yeah bet ya didn't know that) She had a dream one night (won't go in depth) that she wanted to remember so she wrote it down (chapter 13 of Twilight). From there, she just kept writing, she never went to school to be a writer, she never intended on being a writer, so YES her writing style isn't popular among so called "avid" readers or even more "basic" readers... That doesn't stop the books from being enthralling.
And here is where people are going to flip the shit... NO Twilight was not a "Perfect" movie... but when you already love the series you want to see it put to film, even if it could have been done better, you love the movie.
There is so much more I want to say, but I'm going to end with this. You talk about these actors (Pattinson, Stewart, Lautner) and you say that they'll have to live with the fact that they were in this series for years. You have it backwards, how much money, how much fame they are getting for having the opportunity to be a part of a World-Wide phenomenon. People are wanting them for their movies more and more already. I know it may be hard to understand when you don't even put your face on camera when you are bashing wonderful people/actors/movies...
And I hate this even more, cause generally I like your reviews, they are helpful; but when you come of so obviously attacking something, because you don't understand or whatever, it makes you seem like a dick. I'm not saying you have to like the movie, but you can't just say it sucks because it wasn't your cup of tea. (sorry for the rant)
 

RawrMeister

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Nov 12, 2009
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I think this was probably one of the more funnier episodes XD partly because of all the swearing lol
 

Lord Doomhammer

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Great review, good that fucking SOMEONE can see this is complete crap.

But i gotta ask... what the hell is up with the bleeping on your swearing.
 

dex-dex

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Oct 20, 2009
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thank you so freakin much
for stating the obvious statement that this movie blows chunks
i am so glad i was working last night so i could not be dragged to that with one of my friends
take into consideration that i do not see her enough and i should hang out with her more but spending time with her while seeing this bullshit is not quality time.
 
Feb 13, 2008
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AliciaPeck said:
I And by the very definition of this series being a romance, men are 90% more likely NOT to like it. simple facts...
I don't appreciate the boxes that people are trying to put this movie and this book series in.
No, no, no, no boxes here...Men HATE romance. That's why 90% of men don't play games where you can rescue a Princess, or go along with Alyx or Cortana...

Perhaps you should look at the fact that Robert Pattison is thinking of quitting acting because he's surrounded by these crazed women so much that he can't lead a normal life?

She had a dream one night (won't go in depth) that she wanted to remember so she wrote it down (chapter 13 of Twilight). From there, she just kept writing, she never went to school to be a writer, she never intended on being a writer,
And J.K.Rowling was a working mum who wrote Harry Potter for her kids while "struggling" on the dole. And Paris Hilton never had a push other than her video. And the moon is made of green cheese.

Her publicists must love you. You're doing their job for free.

You love the movie even though you admit it's bad. Doesn't that worry you at all?
 
Feb 13, 2008
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Noelveiga said:
The_root_of_all_evil said:
And J.K.Rowling was a working mum who wrote Harry Potter for her kids while "struggling" on the dole. And Paris Hilton never had a push other than her video. And the moon is made of green cheese.
For the record, J.K. Rowling is also a terrible writer. I vaguely remember being a teenager, and I'm pretty sure your books don't need to be dumb to be appealing to kids. Harry Potter isn't dumb because it is for youngsters, it is dumb, period.
The Phantom Tollbooth, A Wrinkle in Time, The Very Hungry Caterpillar, The Gruffalo, Where the Wild Things Are, Alice in Wonderland, Charlotte's Web, Harriet the Spy, James and The Giant Peach, Peter Pan, The Wind in the Willows, The Diary of Anne Frank.

All extraordinary kids books that don't talk down to kids, don't spoonfeed messages and can still be enjoyed by adults.
 

MovieBob

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Dec 31, 2008
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AliciaPeck said:
As far as the review specifically, you mention Stephenie Meyer's chosen profession, and as I'm sure you haven't done any research on her or the series past reading/bashing them, I'll give you a little insight. Mrs. Meyer's "chosen profession" was stay at home mom. (yeah bet ya didn't know that) She had a dream one night (won't go in depth) that she wanted to remember so she wrote it down (chapter 13 of Twilight). From there, she just kept writing, she never went to school to be a writer, she never intended on being a writer, so YES her writing style isn't popular among so called "avid" readers or even more "basic" readers...
Actually, I did know that. I also know that one CAN have more than one profession (I've got two, possibly three by certain measures.) I'm sure she's a fine mother (though I'd LOVE to be a fly on the wall if the creator of Edward Cullen happened to have a dating-age daughter who came home with an ACTUAL dark/mysterious/violent guy with "serial abuser" written on his forehead "but he says he WORSHIPS me!!!!!") but since she's publishing these books that makes her a professional writer, and not a very good one. And I'm not talking about the story, I'm talking about basic Jr. High creative-writing class stuff here: Obvious foreshadowing, atonal dialogue, dangling plot threads, ham-fisted metaphors, finales where nothing happens, etc.

There is so much more I want to say, but I'm going to end with this. You talk about these actors (Pattinson, Stewart, Lautner) and you say that they'll have to live with the fact that they were in this series for years. You have it backwards, how much money, how much fame they are getting for having the opportunity to be a part of a World-Wide phenomenon. People are wanting them for their movies more and more already.
You might want to ask Jaleel White how that worked out for him. Or Macauly Culkin. Dustin Diamond. The Olsen Twins. Any of those kids from the "Power Rangers" shows. Have you heard from Jake Lloyd lately? Hayden Christensen? Hell... how many 'new' actors with onscreen roles in even "Star Wars" went on to much? ONE: Harrison Ford. Carrie Fisher fell off the face of the Earth, Mark Hammill spent decades slumming in B-movies before finding his calling as a voice-actor. It doesn't even "only" apply to movies: Only Michael survived The Jackson Five, only Timberlake is still a star after the 90s 'boy band' bubble burst. "That 70s Show" was on for YEARS, huge hit... the only member of the main cast who's currently a bankable actor is Mila Kunis, since even Kutcher has moved mostly into being a commercial pitchman and Mr. Demi Moore.

Frankly, looking at it objectively, I mostly see the "Twilight" alumns breaking on similar lines. As of right now, the only one of these kids I can virtually garauntee you you'll still hear from once this has wrapped up is Anna Kendrick, ("Jessica,") because she has a co-starring role in a fantastic George Clooney movie called "Up In The Air" that'll be out later in the year (probably nominated for a bunch of Oscars too) and she's going to blow the hell up after that. Lautner has some kind of martial-arts background in addition to being a not-terrible actor in these, so if he hooks up with some cheap action vehicles or maybe a superhero franchise he could make it (though maybe not after all the mind-bogglingly stupid stuff he'll be made to do onscreen in "Breaking Dawn.")

Stewart IS a good actress, but this series is going to haunt her - people making the kind of "quality" movies she'll need to build a solid reputation won't want to risk the blowback of putting "someone from Twilight" in the cast. Hell, she probably can't even get other "GENRE" work - every other actor in her generation is trying to hook-in with superhero/scifi franchises as a safety net, but she probably wouldn't be able to: Can you imagine if there was even a RUMOR that she was up for, just as an example, "Batgirl?" The comic fans would RIOT at the idea of anyone from "Twilight" 'tainting' their stuff. It's unfair, and it sucks, but it is what it is.

Pattinson, on the other hand? You're NEVER gonna hear from him again six to ten years from now (and you can tell he knows this - hence why he's such a tool about Meyer and the fans when caught off-guard.) He's not an especially good actor, and after this his "likability" is shot to hell. He has some wannabe-edgy urban-crime thing coming out soon, just watch: It'll do a HUGE opening weekend then fall off the radar. He'll be LUCKY to end up like, say, Scott Baio - probably more like Willie Ames. A decade from now he'll have "Found Jesus" or somesuch ;)
 

MovieBob

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Dec 31, 2008
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Incidentally, this didn't really "belong" in the review proper since it doesn't necessarily connect with "is the movie good or not?", but I figured I might as well put it out there while the putting's good...

When you look at it objectively, the "moral" (or "lesson," if you prefer) of this story for it's young female audience kinda boils down to: "If the guy you want doesn't reciprocate and/or breaks it off, the BEST response is to repeatedly attempt suicide to PROVE how much you love him... people will pay attention to you again AND you'll get him back!"

Yikes.

Now, my observation of this isn't necessarily a condemnation of the author's motives (Bella, under analysis, is a classic codependent sexual-submissive, but it is fiction after all) but I do think that it goes to explaining some of the voracious enthusiasm the series generates: Like it or not, that's the way A LOT of emotionally-unstable teenage girls see the world. In other words, it can be safely concluded that Meyer writes from about the same "headspace" as most of her teenaged target-audience. Now, you can call that PRAISE... but if you do I imagine you don't actually know many teenagers ;)

And don't even get started on the Werewolves, who're even closer to a straight-up romanticism of "the surrendered wife"-style domestic abuse. The "top" wolf guy's wife has a big gnarly scar running down half her face because he "lost his temper" one time; but instead of taking off and/or stocking-up on silver bullets this experience only convinces her to be MORE committed... and, of course, a more docile and obedient housewife - her main "role" in the series is making sure big, hearty meals are always on the table whenever he and his boys turn up. But he loves her, so it's okay. Yeesh...
 

Tonimata

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Jul 21, 2008
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Simply no.
I mean, why even bother? A while back it was High School Musical, now it's vampires, next thing it will be the new movie with Vanessa Hudgens School Rock Band, and then rockers will be popular.Something I have mixed feelings about. I mean, I sure as hell like attention, but when I do somehting to earn it.

Just shoot silver bullets at the screen at it will goooooo awaaaaaay