Escape to the Movies: White House Down

MB202

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...WE'RE GETTING A CAPTAIN PLANET MOVIE?!?!?! ...Fuck it, I'd watch it. Especially if they had the theme somewhere in there.
 

honeybakedham

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That was some serious fawning over Roland Emmerich... a man who has never made an even barely watchable movie, and I'm including his German made English language debut, Moon 44.

No one can deny his skill as a technical craftsman. Yes, he can frame a shot and direct effects and you can even follow his action, unlike say, Micheal Bay. But no matter what popular opinion and nostalgia may be, Independence Day (or IQ4) is a giant mess based on the absolute sheer stupidity of it's ridiculous script. 2012, Day After Tomorrow, and everything else he's directed suffers each time from that same absurdity.

His films are built on connecting head slapping moments of unbelievable coincidence and groan inducing irrational and illogical plot points into Irwin Allen-esque road movies on steroids. Oh, the fighter pilot's stripper wife managed to save the President's Wife AND lead refugees, by accident, to the secret military base in the desert where Wil Smith is already there ready to save the world? Wow. Really? Oh, and the aliens can be destroyed by uploading a Mac Laptop virus? Are you kidding me?

Bob was right to call Emmerich "nuts", though he shouldn't have done it in a way that makes it sound endearing. The man is outright loony nuts... and while big action set pieces might seem awesome, nothing is ever awesome enough to make a bad story good. Films have to start with good stories and relatable characters and smartly written dialog before the alleged awesomeness of their big bangs and blow ups are gonna do any good.

Of course, I'm gonna see this movie eventually... because its a movie, and I see pretty much everything. But with all choices out there, this one can wait for the small screen. I see no reason to support yet another Emmerich disaster which is sure to please legions of non-discriminating Americans in need of two air conditioned hours out of the sun... but is still just another absurd excuse to hire a pyrotechnics guy.
 

Jacco

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Normally I fucking loathe political movies, especially ones with left wing leanings (so pretty much anything by Oliver Stone) because they tend to be subversive and lecturey. But I may actually have to see this if it is as open and ridiculous as Bob makes it seem. I don't necessarily mind the politics of the left, I just don't like being lectured at which is how most of those types turn out. So I think I'd appreciate the in your face style here.

Also, an armored limosine car chase rocket launcher battle on the White House lawn just looks fucking awesome.
 

Jacco

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honeybakedham said:
That was some serious fawning over Roland Emmerich... a man who has never made an even barely watchable movie, and I'm including his German made English language debut, Moon 44.

No one can deny his skill as a technical craftsman. Yes, he can frame a shot and direct effects and you can even follow his action, unlike say, Micheal Bay. But no matter what popular opinion and nostalgia may be, Independence Day (or IQ4) is a giant mess based on the absolute sheer stupidity of it's ridiculous script. 2012, Day After Tomorrow, and everything else he's directed suffers each time from that same absurdity.

His films are built on connecting head slapping moments of unbelievable coincidence and groan inducing irrational and illogical plot points into Irwin Allen-esque road movies on steroids. Oh, the fighter pilot's stripper wife managed to save the President's Wife AND lead refugees, by accident, to the secret military base in the desert where Wil Smith is already there ready to save the world? Wow. Really? Oh, and the aliens can be destroyed by uploading a Mac Laptop virus? Are you kidding me?

Bob was right to call Emmerich "nuts", though he shouldn't have done it in a way that makes it sound endearing. The man is outright loony nuts... and while big action set pieces might seem awesome, nothing is ever awesome enough to make a bad story good. Films have to start with good stories and relatable characters and smartly written dialog before the alleged awesomeness of their big bangs and blow ups are gonna do any good.

Of course, I'm gonna see this movie eventually... because its a movie, and I see pretty much everything. But with all choices out there, this one can wait for the small screen. I see no reason to support yet another Emmerich disaster which is sure to please legions of non-discriminating Americans in need of two air conditioned hours out of the sun... but is still just another absurd excuse to hire a pyrotechnics guy.
But it's Roland Emmerich. That's his thing. You go to a Roland Emmerich film expecitng absurd, over the top, crazy things to happen and that's exactly what you get. Expecting anything more is like going to a Michael Bay film and expecting a drama. So I don't think it's fair to say it's unwatchable because you know what you're in for before you even buy the ticket. If that's not your kind of movie, then why are you going to see it?
 

Guffe

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It looks really good.
My free ticket is going to man of steel tomorrow and I know what movie I'm going to next week :D
 

Jake the Snake

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I'm sorry. This is the same guy who made 2012? Ugh, that movie was SHIT. And Bob gave a glowing review of it. I'm gonna have to hard pass on this one, Bob.
 

SNCommand

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Mezmer said:
I'm sorry. This is the same guy who made 2012? Ugh, that movie was SHIT. And Bob gave a glowing review of it. I'm gonna have to hard pass on this one, Bob.
I'm actually wondering if Bob is being serious on this one considering how this movie is getting slaughtered by other movie critics

One guy wrote that "White House Down makes Olympus has Fallen look like Citizen Kane in comparison"
 

gorfias

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Mezmer said:
I'm sorry. This is the same guy who made 2012? Ugh, that movie was SHIT. And Bob gave a glowing review of it. I'm gonna have to hard pass on this one, Bob.
Got to agree. I can't believe Bob loved this. Maybe because it fits his politics? 2012 was shit. Independence Day was his best flick, and it was an over-blown B movie anyhow.

I just can't get excited about this with Olympus Has Fallen just having come out weeks ago. I did see that. It was OK. Nothing more.
 

Darklord008

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Came in to this review thinking it was going to be crap.

"This is a great, fun movie!" Well, I'm intrigued.

"AND it's about something!" Hey, even more intrigued.

"It's a left-wing political takedown!" ........

Well, back to Independence Day.
 

TheDrunkNinja

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The problem I have with ridiculous on-the-nose politically-topical one-sided hero-worship/demonization is that the person who praises the film saying that Hollywood "shouldn't be so afraid to be offensive and flip people off sometimes" would be shouting fire and brimstone at the film if it was the other way around.

I'll still totally see it since I absolutely adore crazy action films of utter ridiculousness regardless of the political agenda they boast.
 

hermes

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I am all for new, good takes in the Die Hard "genre", given that the official sequels has been lackluster at best.

Also, 2016? Really? I know movies are hard to make, but publishing a release date 3 years from now almost seems like wish fulfillment.
 

Deathfish15

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Captain Planet movie announced just as the President does some speech about global warming....coincidence? I think not!


This one does look a lot better than the other white-house-under-attack movie that started out earlier in the year. But, I'm still saving my movie experience for the District 9 director's Elysium movie. That looks far more badass.
 

twistedmic

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Why do I get the feeling that Bob only likes this movie because Rolland Emmerich was at the helm? And that if anyone else, Micheal Bay or Owe Boll for example, Bob would have mercilessly torn it to shreds for the exact same reasons that he was praising it?
 

Gorrath

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Jacco said:
But it's Roland Emmerich. That's his thing. You go to a Roland Emmerich film expecitng absurd, over the top, crazy things to happen and that's exactly what you get. Expecting anything more is like going to a Michael Bay film and expecting a drama. So I don't think it's fair to say it's unwatchable because you know what you're in for before you even buy the ticket. If that's not your kind of movie, then why are you going to see it?
You're right of course, but pretending Emmerich is somehow a good film maker because 'you know what you're getting' might as well apply to anyone from Michael Bay to M. Night. 2012 and The Day After Tomorrow were bad, stupid films. That's not to say Emmerich sucks all around, but I can just about guarantee that if Emmerich made a movie about Not George Bush shooting RPGs at an alliance of eco-terrorists, occupy people, and illegal immigrants with all the same gusto and silliness as his usual work it would be panned.

I actually like Independence Day for all of its faults but I also like Bad Boys 2 and other crappy films. While I'll withhold judgement until I see this film, the whole review does smack of getting a pass because it aligns with Bob's political ideologies.
 

Veylon

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Captain Planet? Seriously!? I would've thought we'd be safe from that one anyway.

I dunno, given how much things have changed since the 80's, maybe this time he could take on the smog monsters worldwide [http://www.care2.com/causes/top-10-smoggiest-countries-in-the-world.html] instead of solely lecturing Americans. There's plenty of coal burning in China these days. Heck, they could do battle against the coal seam fires [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coal_seam_fire]. Some kind of monster made of smoldering coal would be pretty neat. I'm probably getting my hopes up too much.
 

Vie

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Wait wait wait!

Hollywood have realised that there are those of us on the left wing of politics who appreciate the occasional action movie? And then based on that went out and made a film that's aimed at appealing to us?

Look out everybody, there might be a lot of pig guano falling from the skies soon.
 

Ferisar

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Gorrath said:
Jacco said:
But it's Roland Emmerich. That's his thing. You go to a Roland Emmerich film expecitng absurd, over the top, crazy things to happen and that's exactly what you get. Expecting anything more is like going to a Michael Bay film and expecting a drama. So I don't think it's fair to say it's unwatchable because you know what you're in for before you even buy the ticket. If that's not your kind of movie, then why are you going to see it?
You're right of course, but pretending Emmerich is somehow a good film maker because 'you know what you're getting' might as well apply to anyone from Michael Bay to M. Night. 2012 and The Day After Tomorrow were bad, stupid films. That's not to say Emmerich sucks all around, but I can just about guarantee that if Emmerich made a movie about Not George Bush shooting RPGs at an alliance of eco-terrorists, occupy people, and illegal immigrants with all the same gusto and silliness as his usual work it would be panned.

I actually like Independence Day for all of its faults but I also like Bad Boys 2 and other crappy films. While I'll withhold judgement until I see this film, the whole review does smack of getting a pass because it aligns with Bob's political ideologies.
The problem with the comparison is you're somehow equating eco-terrorists, occupy participants and illegal immigrants to... well, what the movie uses. Also, I think we've had plenty of films with Not-Not-Obama. x)

At least until we get the sequel to Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Obama: Vampire Hunter.

As for this movie, I don't think I'll see it until it hits DVD or Netflix. I watched 2012 in theaters and enjoyed it, but only because the bar was set so low when we went to see it that it was almost impossible not to enjoy it.

I'm sure that can happen again with this, but, eh. I'm waiting for Pacific Rim.
 

Gorrath

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Ferisar said:
The problem with the comparison is you're somehow equating eco-terrorists, occupy participants and illegal immigrants to... well, what the movie uses. Also, I think we've had plenty of films with Not-Not-Obama. x)

At least until we get the sequel to Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Obama: Vampire Hunter.
In the fictional movie I'm imaging these eco-terrorists and such are just like the caricatures this movie seems to make of the 'right wing' groups Bob mentioned. I'm equating a completely fictional bunch of 'left wing' nuts with a bunch of fictional 'right wing' nuts. I'm not equating any real groups or ideologies here, and based on the group that Bob described, neither is the movie.