Fictional characters you wish you could punch in the face?

Talaris

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Lewieroo0 said:
Tessa from Full Metal Panic!....Grraaagh i hate this bloody *****. Her voice, her clumsy/dimwitted attitude and the fact that she's the commander of an anti terrorist organisation makes my brain melt into mush.


The Limited Edition Useless Character Footstool! Available While Stocks Last!

Kaname from the same series was a close runner up but she redeemed herself in Fumoffu (Where her characteristics worked better)
Whilst I agree her naivety can be really cringe-worthy, the lighthearted tone of the series wouldn't be the same without her. Plus in second raid she gets some good serious moments too, and pretty much admits she can be an idiot. After all she is only 16, so the real fool is the one that put her in charge in the first place.

Oh and Tessa also has one of the funniest scenes in an OVA.



As for me I guess I would have to vote for two characters.

First being Tomo from Azumanga Daioh



And then Tomoki Sakurai from Sora no Otoshimono. He's such a prick of a protagonist that I dropped this show, something I've only ever done twice.


I suppose Makoto from School Days goes without saying, but his level of stupidity is so legendary that it made the show enjoyable, so I would rather shake his hand than punch him. Besides, he got what he deserved in the end anyway.
 

jdogtwodolla

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Feb 12, 2009
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Sansa Stark for one.

The entire cast of... I think the show is called Awkward. I don't watch this show but from passing glances, I just don't find myself ever wanting healed knuckles in their presence.
 

Not Matt

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Nov 3, 2011
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now. i know that this is probably one of the most easy to hate people to say you wanna kick the crap out of but i am going for her anyway because she is genuinely hateable. i really don't think the movie managed to express just how much you would end up despising this character as the book did. in the book we will not only be spending more time with her. but you will also learn more about her. and the more you learn, the more you wish to push her in front of oncoming traffic. she is just an asshole by every definition of the word

i'll admit. he is funny as a cartoon character. But he is the embodiment everything that is is wrong with my generation

everyone who call themselves "Gangsta" unironically and spend more money on shit thay don't even need than bill gates do on charity is not someone i want to be within a fifty feet radius off. call me prestigious if you want to but i do not like the idea of idiots making crime seem glamours for the sake of being a prick

good god guys. i know the show is essentially for little girls and a younger audience. but for Christ sake, grow a god damn pair. all you do is to either be obnoxious, stupid or sexually frustrated slaves. i know you're all one-episode-characters but.....god! it is genuinely depressing to look at you all.

ps: and bronies. i know someone will probably mention it so i am getting it out of the way now: i am only talking about the ponies. discord and spike and .... the rest (if i mention all the non pony guys then we'll be here all night) still rank up as cool and funny.
 

Dangit2019

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Johnny Novgorod said:
The ponies from MLP. Punch them long and punch them hard. Punch them until their equine molars are flying in bloody arcs through the air while the brony community watches in silence. In the distance, someone snivels.
Hey! I read that fanfiction too! It was pretty good, but the ending needed some work.

OT: Misa Misa from Death Note. I just wanted her to shut her face as soon as she started loving all over Light.
 

Ishal

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Dangit2019 said:
Johnny Novgorod said:
The ponies from MLP. Punch them long and punch them hard. Punch them until their equine molars are flying in bloody arcs through the air while the brony community watches in silence. In the distance, someone snivels.
Hey! I read that fanfiction too! It was pretty good, but the ending needed some work.

OT: Misa Misa from Death Note. I just wanted her to shut her face as soon as she started loving all over Light.
That fanfiction was great! I don't think the ending had the effect he is looking for though. Ah well.

OT: Lots of people hating Joffrey.. I get it, but there is far FAR worse in ASOIAF. I'm talking Ramsay Snow. He makes Joffrey look like a kid playing with building blocks.

Kenpachi Zaraki and every character from Bleach
Naruto Uzamaki and every character from Naruto

In fact, most characters from shonen anime.
 

keniakittykat

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I know I wouldn't live to tell the tale, but I just want to punch Superboy prime. He's a whiny asshole! "Uuuuh, my universe is waay better, this would never happen in my world." Man the fuck up, you're no help, and you suck. Die in a sea of kryptonite needles, *****.
 

Zipzip the Penguin

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I know it's an old book series, but Opal Koboi from Artemis Fowl. I don't think I need to elaborate.
Also, the Scout from TF2.
The twitchy bastard thinks he's hot shit and he just doesn't shut up. Ever.
After that, I'd smash Dark Samus's face in. She corrupted and made Samus kill Rundas, the only one in the galaxy to ever care enough to have her back.
Next up on the list of faces I want to turn inside out is Willie Scott from the Indy and the Temple of Doom. She never helps anyone, her voice is annoying as all hell, and she does nothing but ***** and moan when she's not screaming her ass off. God her screaming was annoying. The only reason she even existed was for Indy to save her sorry ass. He should've let her burn in the fucking pit.
Also in line for face-smashing would be Anakin Skywalker from the prequels. MAN the FUCK UP. Let's be honest, he was the weakest character in the entire series and to make matters worse, the whole plot of the prequels was supposed to pivot off of this one character.
 

Ace Morologist

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James Whatshisface from Mass Effect 3. (Stow the attitude, meathead. I'm always right and I always win.)

Navi from Ocarina of Time. (No, YOU listen. Just go Z-target that dude or I'm gonna stick YOU in a bottle.)

The Guild Master from Fable. (I know my sh!t is low, dude. I've got potions mapped to my D-pad for just such an emergency.)

Farengar from Skyrim. (Maybe don't insult me straight to my face when I'm wearing full plate armor and sporting a glowing warhammer on my back, you stuck-up toady. All I gotta do is quicksave and your ass is grass.)

The woman at the museum in that flippin' smartphone commercial who can't just PAY ATTENTION TO THE FLIPPIN' ART FOR FIVE G@D-D&MNED MINUTES!!! (Put down your phone! PUT DOWN YOUR FLIPPIN' PHONE!!!)

--Morology!
 

Sarah Kerrigan

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Ash Williams in the Evil Dead. But, like, in a good way. I'd be all 'you almost die every movie and your so damn reckless! *punch*' Not like a 'grrr angry!' punch. He just seems so punchable, ya know?
 

Relish in Chaos

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TrulyBritish said:
Relish in Chaos said:
I seriously don't get why everyone hates Near. I think they're just pissed about what happened to L. I mean, I liked him, even if he wasn't as multifaceted as L. He was calm, calculating, had a bit of an edge to him...and besides that, I just loved Cathy Weseluck's performance as him.
Well I can't speak for everyone, but I'll put down why I don't like him. I'll spoiler this just in case though. Having only just finished the series a short while ago I have t consider maybe SOMEONE is reading it now.
While this does link down to how much I personally loved L, I just don't feel that Near was any decent successor to him and I hate the way Near was considered to have won. Basically all Near does it focus on things that he assumes. He assumes Light's Kira simply because of the fact he was the new L and that L had suspected him (despite being cleared later) and his discovery of Mikami as X-Kira seemed a bit off. Seriously, Mikami had met Takada twice and appeared on the show, that was Nears evidence -_-. He may have been right but I see no actual reason he should have been so sure of it.
Plus, most of the actual work done is by Mello. It's Mello that discovers that some of the rules are fake (thus making Light a viable suspect) as well as his capture of Takada causing the discovery of the fake Notebook. Without Mello (and actually, without Matsuda's fast reactions at the end) Near would have died at the face off. Not to mention the fact he barely batted an eyelid over the death of his co-workers.
And ultimately his motives rub me the wrong way as well a bit. While L was clearly working for justice there's just too large a feeling for me of the second stage of it just being a contest between Near and Mello.
I accept all of my arguments are pretty petty and flawed, but I still dislike the guy.
Sorry for the rant.
Yeah, I understand and agree with all those points (including his great leap of logic in "L is dead, there's a new L who was suspected to be Kira, therefore L #2 is Kira", although Near does admit that, without Mello, they wouldn't have been able to match L and defeat Light. But perhaps it's because he is so much like L that I like him. I believe he should've gotten more character development, and it would've helped if he wasn't so emotionless.

Mikkaddo said:
Relish in Chaos said:
TrulyBritish said:
You just had to ninja me on everyone one of them didn't you?
Especially that goddam Near... grr.... Never mess with my L you copycat!
I seriously don't get why everyone hates Near. I think they're just pissed about what happened to L. I mean, I liked him, even if he wasn't as multifaceted as L. He was calm, calculating, had a bit of an edge to him...and besides that, I just loved Cathy Weseluck's performance as him.
To me, Near felt like more of a copy of L than his own character. Granted, I felt the death of L was a great plot point and crucial to the story's movements, but Near felt like they were saying "Well, L is dead but we can't do without an L character . . . so let's make a new character who's just like him but still different!"

I loved L, and I enjoyed Near's actions, and his final schemes that ended with Light getting what he's been told several times he deserves and is going to get no matter what . . . but he's still not L . . . he never could have been. It could be worse, not like they suddenly made Goku a kid again just to try and make a rehash of Dragonballl that takes place after the Buu Saga . . . oh wait
Yeah, even Mello (with his seemingly random chocolate-eating trait) seemed to stand on his own better than Near. But it's because I enjoyed Near's actions, as well as how he implemented his toys and finger puppets into his theories, that I liked him. That and, like I aforementioned, I just like Cathy Weseluck's performance of him in the English dub.

One thing about Near that I was iffy on is when he calls him a "loser". I'm still not sure whether or not he was saying it matter-of-factly (because if he really disliked L, then he wouldn't say he respected him and model himself after him even three years after Kira was stopped), or if he really disliked L. Although I think him wearing that mask of L in the Yellow Box warehouse was more of an attempt to wind up Light.
 

DFDelta

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Dec 4, 2011
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Egwene al'Vere from the Wheel of Time books. She starts as a pretty likeable character, but each book she becomes more and more punchable.

75% of all playable characters in every JRPG ever. There are notable exceptions like Jade from Tales of the Abyss or Yuri from Tales of Vesperia, but most of them just invite a good punching.

All my dwarves in Dwarf Fortress. All of them.
 

TrulyBritish

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Relish in Chaos said:
Yeah, I understand and agree with all those points (including his great leap of logic in "L is dead, there's a new L who was suspected to be Kira, therefore L #2 is Kira", although Near does admit that, without Mello, they wouldn't have been able to match L and defeat Light. But perhaps it's because he is so much like L that I like him. I believe he should've gotten more character development, and it would've helped if he wasn't so emotionless.

Yeah, even Mello (with his seemingly random chocolate-eating trait) seemed to stand on his own better than Near. But it's because I enjoyed Near's actions, as well as how he implemented his toys and finger puppets into his theories, that I liked him. That and, like I aforementioned, I just like Cathy Weseluck's performance of him in the English dub.

One thing about Near that I was iffy on is when he calls him a "loser". I'm still not sure whether or not he was saying it matter-of-factly (because if he really disliked L, then he wouldn't say he respected him and model himself after him even three years after Kira was stopped), or if he really disliked L. Although I think him wearing that mask of L in the Yellow Box warehouse was more of an attempt to wind up Light.
Hmm... thinking with all this in light, maybe he's just not written well enough in comparison to L. Like you, I think he could be a good character if there was more written about him, but currently he hasn't gotten enough redeeming qualities for some people to get past both his bad traits and the fact he seems a copy of L to some.
I like to think that Near did look up to L though, They're really quite similar and he seems intent on capturing who he sees as L's killer. I think the 'loser' bit is just a statement of fact. From a more compassionate light, maybe it shows a certain bitterness/sadness in Near, having looked up to L he's now realised that L can't solve everything. I think it'd be like if we actually had a superman like hero and then saw him get killed when we thought he'd always be there for us. But then, that's just one possible take, and certainly by the facts L did play the Game of Thrones, and he lost.
 

Yaridovich23

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Apr 21, 2013
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Sakura from Naruto is definitely one of them. She is such an awful ***** to poor Naruto throughout most of the series. She's given him enough usually unneeded punches in the face or gut to deserve it, I'd say.
 

Henrik Knudsen

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WouldYouKindly said:
Sansa. I would have put her, but I couldn't really put my heart in it. She's just had so much horrible shit happen to her in such a short period of time.
Perhaps later, but early in the show.. Argghhh. Could just tell from Joffreys smug face in season 1 episode 1 he would be an idiot of the major kind.
 

Lewieroo0

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Talaris said:
Lewieroo0 said:
Tessa from Full Metal Panic!....Grraaagh i hate this bloody *****. Her voice, her clumsy/dimwitted attitude and the fact that she's the commander of an anti terrorist organisation makes my brain melt into mush.


The Limited Edition Useless Character Footstool! Available While Stocks Last!

Kaname from the same series was a close runner up but she redeemed herself in Fumoffu (Where her characteristics worked better)
Whilst I agree her naivety can be really cringe-worthy, the lighthearted tone of the series wouldn't be the same without her. Plus in second raid she gets some good serious moments too, and pretty much admits she can be an idiot. After all she is only 16, so the real fool is the one that put her in charge in the first place.

Oh and Tessa also has one of the funniest scenes in an OVA.
hmm well personally i can't say i agree with most of the points above.

Talaris said:
the lighthearted tone of the series wouldn't be the same without her.
actually i think it would be better without her. I couldn't consider her stupidity to be "lighthearted".

Talaris said:
Plus in second raid she gets some good serious moments too, and pretty much admits she can be an idiot.
urrgh...Second Raid...personally i thought those serious moments were her worst scenes just showing what a pathetic character she was (although i generally thought most of The Second Raid was awful in terms of story and characters).

Talaris said:
After all she is only 16, so the real fool is the one that put her in charge in the first place.
now THAT i can agree with. Whoever thought she was perfect to lead an anti-terrorist organisation should be flogged.

Talaris said:
Oh and Tessa also has one of the funniest scenes in an OVA.
haven't seen the OVA but knowing what it's about and having seen gifs from it....yeeeaah staying far away from it -_-

But that's just my opinion. I've had mixed feelings on the whole series and i mostly like it just for Sousuke (Which is why fummofuu is one of my favourite Anime Comedies)