I bought my first game in over a year and a half today! Destiny 2!... for my girlfriend?s son for his birthday, so it was basically against my will; if you?ve never stared into the eyes of a 12-year-old with ADHD who?s drenched in hormones and literally quaking with so much pent up energy, he?s molecularly unstable while he?s telling you he wants something, you don?t know terror; we?re building a panic room for puberty.
Anyway, I used to walk into Game Stops like a kid in a candy store: sparse floors, but walls covered in worlds to save, damsels to rescue, aliens to kill and spells to cast. But today, I walked into one for the first time in months and just felt? exhausted. Nothing excited me. After stepping over the piles of tangential gaming merch (because Game Stop now apparently moonlights as a thrift store for action figures,) I scoured the shelves, reading the titles: ?Crap? Shit? Crap 2? Shit Revengenece? Madden 18?. Crap 2 Remastered? ? Nothing looked remotely interesting and everything looked the same. That?s about when the 20-something clerk popped over with the mandatory ?can I help you with anything?? I rolled my eyes and said over my shoulder in my most disaffected monotone: ?Destiny 2. Xbox One. Yes, I have a rewards card. Yes, I know it?s expired. No I don?t want to renew it.? She hopped back to her side of the counter and we had this exchange:
Clerk: Did you pre-order Destiny 2 with us?
Me: ?No? (Looking past her at the dozen available copies four feet behind her frickin? head.)
Clerk: And did you want to go ahead and pick up the expansion pass today as well? (?Go ahead,? like it?s a foregone conclusion I?ll be buying it at some point.)
Me: No.
Clerk: You sure? It?s on sale this week only.
Me: NO.
Clerk: Ok, but just so you know, if you buy the content separately, you?ll pay mo...
Me: (cutting her off) I?ve been gaming longer than you?ve been ALIVE and certainly well before day one DLC was basically standard; I know how it works; it doesn?t. If the brat I?m buying this for wants DLC, he can spend his birthday money on it.
Clerk: Okay then, and do you want to buy a lifetime scratch protection for $3
Me: *sighs* NO, I don?t even want to give you $67 for that disc in your hand, but that?s the fastest way out of this store!
Clerk: (Laughing) So, I guess I needn?t bother asking you if there was anything you wanted to pre-order?
Me: ?Please, no.
And of course, they didn?t have any copies of Dark Souls II. Thanks, Game Stop; was hoping you?d help pull me out of my gaming funk, instead you shoved me face first deeper into it. Guess I?m headed back to the bar and my NG+6 run in Dark Souls.
Anyway, I used to walk into Game Stops like a kid in a candy store: sparse floors, but walls covered in worlds to save, damsels to rescue, aliens to kill and spells to cast. But today, I walked into one for the first time in months and just felt? exhausted. Nothing excited me. After stepping over the piles of tangential gaming merch (because Game Stop now apparently moonlights as a thrift store for action figures,) I scoured the shelves, reading the titles: ?Crap? Shit? Crap 2? Shit Revengenece? Madden 18?. Crap 2 Remastered? ? Nothing looked remotely interesting and everything looked the same. That?s about when the 20-something clerk popped over with the mandatory ?can I help you with anything?? I rolled my eyes and said over my shoulder in my most disaffected monotone: ?Destiny 2. Xbox One. Yes, I have a rewards card. Yes, I know it?s expired. No I don?t want to renew it.? She hopped back to her side of the counter and we had this exchange:
Clerk: Did you pre-order Destiny 2 with us?
Me: ?No? (Looking past her at the dozen available copies four feet behind her frickin? head.)
Clerk: And did you want to go ahead and pick up the expansion pass today as well? (?Go ahead,? like it?s a foregone conclusion I?ll be buying it at some point.)
Me: No.
Clerk: You sure? It?s on sale this week only.
Me: NO.
Clerk: Ok, but just so you know, if you buy the content separately, you?ll pay mo...
Me: (cutting her off) I?ve been gaming longer than you?ve been ALIVE and certainly well before day one DLC was basically standard; I know how it works; it doesn?t. If the brat I?m buying this for wants DLC, he can spend his birthday money on it.
Clerk: Okay then, and do you want to buy a lifetime scratch protection for $3
Me: *sighs* NO, I don?t even want to give you $67 for that disc in your hand, but that?s the fastest way out of this store!
Clerk: (Laughing) So, I guess I needn?t bother asking you if there was anything you wanted to pre-order?
Me: ?Please, no.
And of course, they didn?t have any copies of Dark Souls II. Thanks, Game Stop; was hoping you?d help pull me out of my gaming funk, instead you shoved me face first deeper into it. Guess I?m headed back to the bar and my NG+6 run in Dark Souls.