Gay Relationships

Lieju

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Jan 4, 2009
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piscian said:
I think in the next few years were gonna move on from this gay and LGTB stuff and just be whatever. I watched this online battle the other day over whether freddie mercury Identified as Bi or gay. I really don't care and I don't identify as anything. Theres that TIME article that came out recently about how in 20 years most people will be mixed tan skin and eye color and we'll all look the same anyway. Thats how I feel about sex. If you're a dude whos into dudes only then hey thats your thing why label it? I'm not into guys right now doesn't mean I won't be tomorrow. I'll never understand why people need to box themselves in like that.
Because the society cares. I don't care for labels, and if I could choose, I'd never have to identify my self as being attracted to women. (Or by gender for that matter.)
Unfortunately I live in a society where people care, (and automatically label you as straight unless they can ridicule you for being gay) and demonizing and ridiculing non-heterosexual people is common.
Telling people I'm lesbian is just a simple shorthand for reminding them not everyone is straight, and that LGBT+ folks are actual people.
Because it's far less easy to do something like equate all gay people with child molesters or ignore the fact they don't have equal rights if you actually know someone like that.

The society likes its boxes, and they've been trying to stick me into the cishet box for my whole life, telling me my feelings aren't valid and I'll grow out of being gay for example.
 

poundingmetal74

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Mar 30, 2009
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Saltyk said:
So, if I'm straight because that simply how I am, why would someone go against that and choose to be gay? Especially considering how difficult that sort of life can be. And I realized that a person wouldn't choose that.
The Onion had a great article called something like "baby chooses to be gay," which perfectly sums up this point you made. Indeed a lot of gay people would not choose to be attracted to the same gender and make many aspects of our lives more difficult. But we are. And possibly as early as life in the womb, that switch to being attracted to the same gender is already set.
 

Arcane Azmadi

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Jan 23, 2009
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I have nothing against gay men, I just wouldn't want one to marry my daughter.

(DISCLAMER: that was a JOKE. I don't even HAVE a daughter and I'm fully supportive of homosexuals. I just thought it was just too good a joke not to make.)

Sampler said:
So we're pretty much all fine and dandy with homosexuality, but what about polygamy? How do people feel about someone's ability to have more than one true love and how would they feel if their significant other proposed the idea?
If you think about it for a moment, the bias against polygamy has its roots in the same bias against homosexuality- the insistence on rigidly defining what a "proper relationship" is allowed to be. The same way the homophobes insist that marriage must be between a man and a woman, most normal, fair-minded people are perfectly willing to lose the gender limitations and let it be "between two people"- but still insist on sticking to the number.

Let's break it down into a series of points, shall we?
1. Unless you're some kind of sappy romantic who believes there is one and only one perfect "soulmate" out there who is "meant for you", most people will accept that it's perfectly possible for there to be more than one person in the world at a time that you're capable of loving.
2. Now, say you meet two of these people at the same time. They're both the kind of person you can fall for- maybe not necessarily the same kind of person, but both right for you.
3. So what do you do? Conventional wisdom (and the laws of love-triangle melodrama) insist that you have to "choose" one of them to be with and the other can only be a friend at best, or a "second love" when your first chosen one dies in a tragic car accident halfway through the third act.
4. But why is that? There are two people near you that you're in love with, so what's preventing you from simply being with both of them? "Because that's not how it's done." Apparently you only have a finite amount of love (not counting between family members) and you aren't allowed to split it between more than one person.
5. So the excluded party gets to be unhappy (at best they get to be a friend of the person they love) and you get to be less happy than you could otherwise be, because you're not getting to be with one of the two people you love. But that's alright, because at least you're not breaking societal taboos.

Personally, if I knew that someone I loved who loved me back and was in a relatinoship with also had someone else they loved enough to want to have a relationship with, why would I want to deny them? OK, she'd have to split her time and attention between us, but between me and the other man we could only make her happier than either of us could make her alone. Insisting she choose would only result in one of us being unhappy and her being less happy than she could be, and wouldn't that be awfully selfish of me (not to mention arrogant to assume that I can make her happier alone than two men she loves at once)?

Of course there is always the possibility of extenuating circumstances to take into account- if two of the "corners" in a love triangle can't stand each other, or if one of them is visibly bad for the 3rd party. And of course there's always selfish people who just take and take in a relationship who want it all for themselves (but they appear in monogamous relationships as well). But I think this argument I make forms a strong basis to start from.
 

San Martin

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Jun 21, 2013
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kingthrall said:
Somebody think of the priests for a change. Marriage is a religious ceremony and gay people trying to force the hand of the church to get married is just insane to me. You cant change the words in the bible, you burn in hell for being gay simple as that as its a sin written in the bible. I would of thought homosexual people would have better understanding about forcing life values on others especially priests to certify and betray their sworn oaths to the church. Yes im taking it from a christian/catholic perspective as a example.

That doesn't mean im against getting some sort of certificate to say two of the same sex are a couple under some official external ceremony even though I find it morally wrong it would be the right thing to do to make everyone happy.

Finally there should be no bonuses/penalties for same sex couples to hetro couples the rules should be the same.
You can correct me if I'm wrong, but as far as I know nobody is trying to force churches to conduct marriages to don't agree with, but rather they want gay marriage to be recognised by the state.

Also, the Bible is very open to interpretation, and the idea that being gay is a sin is not set in stone, contrary to what many people think.
 

the_dramatica

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Dec 6, 2014
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DizzyChuggernaut said:
Just my take on it, people are free to disagree. My advice: Just don't be a dick to people that are in consensual non-monogamous relationships and we'll be fine.
Problem is sustaining the polygamous relationship. Eventually, somebody will feel neglected. You'll see it succeed often in places like the middle east where a man will take 74 wives commonly.
 

Redlin5_v1legacy

Better Red than Dead
Aug 5, 2009
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I find sex same relationships totally acceptable. The genitalia involved is not the critical thing for me, age is the factor I am concerned about. If both are consenting adults, go for it. I have no business dictating the path two adults have directing their lives sexually, financially and emotionally. If someone underage is risked in physical/sexual abuse, then I have all the objections!

Basically same sex is okay, pedophilia I have words for you. And possibly a baseball bat if need be.
 

Dizchu

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Sep 23, 2014
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the_dramatica said:
Problem is sustaining the polygamous relationship. Eventually, somebody will feel neglected.
Not necessarily. Also people in monogamous relationships feel neglected all the time, it just depends on the kind of people involved. Some may even feel less neglected in polyamorous relationships because if one person can't give them attention, someone else could. That said, it's definitely not for everyone. Just like monogamy.
 

Vivi22

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Aug 22, 2010
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Not only am I fine with gay relationships, I'll take it a few steps farther and say that there is no other view which is rationally or morally acceptable and anyone who disagrees is objectively wrong and on the wrong side of history. They will also likely spend much of their lives embarrassing their children and grandchildren with their absurd beliefs, assuming they aren't the type that end up having a gay child that they drive to suicide.
 

Imperioratorex Caprae

Henchgoat Emperor
May 15, 2010
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Ten Foot Bunny said:
cathou said:
it's doesnt matter if a civil marriage is between two men, two women or a man and a woman. it's not a gay marriage, it's just a marriage that doesnt involve God...
I'm probably being overly semantic here, but I don't think a marriage that isn't performed or blessed by a religious institution is missing a spiritual component. The spiritual aspect (or lack thereof) can be whatever the couple in question wishes it to be. I doubt that two gay Catholics would consider their marriage less blessed or, at worst, null and void because the Vatican thinks that they own the only correctly interpreted message of God, and thus refused the couple a church wedding.

One of my core beliefs is that deity in all of its forms isn't anything that we can fully understand in these human bodies, yet it exists everywhere.

And sorry if I AM being overly semantic - I'm not trying to get preachy. ;) I'm just an agnostic (not to be confused with atheist) lesbian who believes that love is stronger than human blindness or willful ignorance.
Nice to see someone else who can articulate my own feelings better than I can (minus the whole lesbian thing but thats a different topic). Thank you for summing up something I've been sort of struggling with to communicate without coming off the wrong way.
 

Kotaro

Desdinova's Successor
Feb 3, 2009
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As someone who's bisexual, I have known a number of people both male and female to whom I've been attracted. And one of my best friends is currently in a homosexual relationship.

Lilikins said:
....I find same sex relationships ok, and I find it should be allowed all over the world that marriage is allowed. If you love someone, you love them...end of discussion....
This is pretty much exactly what I think on the matter. Love is love, and that should be celebrated*.

*When it's between two consenting adults. Feel I should specify, just in case some asshole decides to accuse me of being okay with paedophilia or something.

Lilikins said:
....I fell in love with her personality...so even if it were of the same sex..I think I wouldve fallen love regardless....
That is the kind of relationship I want to have. Kudos to you, good sir.

Sampler said:
So we're pretty much all fine and dandy with homosexuality, but what about polygamy? How do people feel about someone's ability to have more than one true love and how would they feel if their significant other proposed the idea?
I see no problem with it as long as everyone involved is okay with it.
 

the_dramatica

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Dec 6, 2014
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@jim trailor
it was a bad year for video games and video game drama, what can we say. Hopefully 2015 opens up with some suicide bombings and corporate corruption so we have more interesting topics.

I personally would like seeing some Muslim faction declaring Jihad on a video game developer.
 

Glaice

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Mar 18, 2013
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I am in full support of this and same sex marriages, having both gay & transgender friends and been to a gay wedding. It is 2015 and still not the entire world is not 100% universal (esp. developed countries) with this and it disappoints me.
 

kingthrall

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May 31, 2011
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San Martin said:
kingthrall said:
Somebody think of the priests for a change. Marriage is a religious ceremony and gay people trying to force the hand of the church to get married is just insane to me. You cant change the words in the bible, you burn in hell for being gay simple as that as its a sin written in the bible. I would of thought homosexual people would have better understanding about forcing life values on others especially priests to certify and betray their sworn oaths to the church. Yes im taking it from a christian/catholic perspective as a example.

That doesn't mean im against getting some sort of certificate to say two of the same sex are a couple under some official external ceremony even though I find it morally wrong it would be the right thing to do to make everyone happy.

Finally there should be no bonuses/penalties for same sex couples to hetro couples the rules should be the same.
You can correct me if I'm wrong, but as far as I know nobody is trying to force churches to conduct marriages to don't agree with, but rather they want gay marriage to be recognised by the state.

Also, the Bible is very open to interpretation, and the idea that being gay is a sin is not set in stone, contrary to what many people think.
the terminology marriage should not be used. its politically incorrect is my point as well. Also the bible like all holy books are in black and white , its not open to interpretation if its written as a sin.
 

San Martin

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Jun 21, 2013
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kingthrall said:
San Martin said:
kingthrall said:
Somebody think of the priests for a change. Marriage is a religious ceremony and gay people trying to force the hand of the church to get married is just insane to me. You cant change the words in the bible, you burn in hell for being gay simple as that as its a sin written in the bible. I would of thought homosexual people would have better understanding about forcing life values on others especially priests to certify and betray their sworn oaths to the church. Yes im taking it from a christian/catholic perspective as a example.

That doesn't mean im against getting some sort of certificate to say two of the same sex are a couple under some official external ceremony even though I find it morally wrong it would be the right thing to do to make everyone happy.

Finally there should be no bonuses/penalties for same sex couples to hetro couples the rules should be the same.
You can correct me if I'm wrong, but as far as I know nobody is trying to force churches to conduct marriages to don't agree with, but rather they want gay marriage to be recognised by the state.

Also, the Bible is very open to interpretation, and the idea that being gay is a sin is not set in stone, contrary to what many people think.
the terminology marriage should not be used. its politically incorrect is my point as well. Also the bible like all holy books are in black and white , its not open to interpretation if its written as a sin.
Oh, I see. You're wrong on both points. No religion has a monopoly over the word 'marriage', so we can use it until our heads explode if we so choose. Also, the Bible most certainly is not black and white in this regard. If it weren't so open to interpretation, I highly doubt it would have had the historical success it has done.
 

Ryan Minns

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Mar 29, 2011
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Straight male who grew up with a very anti gay family and quite simply... fuck who you want! I'd say love but honestly that limits how open I am to anything. If zero harm is caused (Unless that's the desire of all involved) I have no issues with absolutely ANYTHING.
 

CarlsonAndPeeters

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Mar 18, 2009
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I think Arj Barker said it best:


(if you don't get it, the bit at the end is sarcasm)

But yeah, gay people, straight people, bi people, trans people, polyamorous people, people with fetishes, people without fetishes, sexually active people, asexual people, whatever. It's all great and if you can be happy and make other people happy, then I'm not just okay with it, I'll actively support it.
 

Vault101

I'm in your mind fuzz
Sep 26, 2010
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Saltyk said:
So, if I'm straight because that simply how I am, why would someone go against that and choose to be gay? Especially considering how difficult that sort of life can be. And I realized that a person wouldn't choose that.
poundingmetal74 said:
The Onion had a great article called something like "baby chooses to be gay," which perfectly sums up this point you made. Indeed a lot of gay people would not choose to be attracted to the same gender and make many aspects of our lives more difficult. But we are. And possibly as early as life in the womb, that switch to being attracted to the same gender is already set.
I know this probably isn't what you meant but while the [I/]"its not a choice"[/I] argument would be important for some people too accept themselves,at some point weather or not its [I/]"a choice"[/I] becomes utterly irrelevant

it doesn't matter if its a choice or not, by emphasising the lack of choice you're buying into the idea that its "wrong" on some level

there ARE challenges that aren't Bourne from bigotry, that's for sure BUT there's also some cool stuff about being gay and or "gay culture" [sub/]and bad but that's just people for you[/sub]

everything else...its not the gays who have the problem