Guitar hero Eddie Van Halen has passed away.

Buyetyen

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Yeah vocals can be a bit hit or miss, especially with the higher range male vocalists. Like, I LOVE RUSH, but a lot of people can't stand Geddy Lee's voice. Which I do find a bit odd, since the most common criticism I see about his singing, is the high pitch of it. But these will be people who equally love OTHER metal/rock bands of the same era, that have high pitched singers. *shrugs* to each their own I guess.
I'm a Ghost fan, so I try not to start drama about hit or miss vocals. You can't predict how it's going to work for you. Taste is funny that way.
 
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happyninja42

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I'm a Ghost fan, so I try not to start drama about hit or miss vocals. You can't predict how it's going to work for you. Taste is funny that way.
Yep. That's why I never try and argue with someone about personal tastes when it comes to "I like/dislike this thing in entertainment." I WILL debate "X is objectively bad/good" type statements, as those can be more...well...objectively proven/disproven. But if someone just says something like "yeah I'm not a fan of X, I've never enjoyed it. I prefer Y" My response is usually just *shrugs* "Okie doke, well I like it."

I might ask them what about it they don't like, if I'm curious, as it's an easy way to strike up a conversation with someone. But beyond that, I've got better things to do with my time than try and convince someone that X is actually the greatest/worst thing ever created.
 

Chimpzy

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Axl Rose is, by the most optimistic assessment, more than a little of a knob. But maybe that's part of what he needed to become a rock'n'roll superhero.
I sometimes like to think that "with great talent comes great dickery"
 

happyninja42

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I sometimes like to think that "with great talent comes great dickery"
Nah, plenty of talent out there that aren't assholes, you just don't hear about them because they aren't making an ass of themselves in public, and getting attention. But we do tend to lionize shitty behavior, especially in the digital age, where we can record it, post it online, and let billions all watch the trainwreck. A large percentage of humanity enjoys watching assholes being assholes, and they are more inclined to overlook a lot of assholishness if the person is producing something they love.
 

Gordon_4

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A life of sex, drugs and rock n roll takes its toll.
I know. That's what makes it extra juicy.
It should. Dude's a massive fucking prick, even by diva rock star standards.
The fact that Axl Rose plays for AC/DC now is in my mind some kind of heresy. The kind you can only fix with the flamer. The heavy flamer.
 

happyninja42

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The fact that Axl Rose plays for AC/DC now is in my mind some kind of heresy. The kind you can only fix with the flamer. The heavy flamer.
...wait...wut? Did he replace someone or did they just add him to the group?
 

Chimpzy

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The fact that Axl Rose plays for AC/DC now is in my mind some kind of heresy. The kind you can only fix with the flamer. The heavy flamer.
Why stop there? Cyclonic torpedoes. Burn the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
 

ObsidianJones

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So, hey, I have a question.

As an eighties baby, I certainly know who he is. I wasn't a fan of that kind of music. But I am legitimately saddened when a life is lost. I feel, however, saying that I'm not a fan of his music is kind of trite and neither here or there... But we wouldn't be talking about him if he wasn't some sort of famous.

Should there be any guidelines in expressing remorse over someone dying when you're not a fan of their work? Should you not even mention that part? How do you normally like to go about it?

And before I forget, I am sad that the world is missing another one of its citizens. I hope his family and fans find peace.
 

happyninja42

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So, hey, I have a question.

As an eighties baby, I certainly know who he is. I wasn't a fan of that kind of music. But I am legitimately saddened when a life is lost. I feel, however, saying that I'm not a fan of his music is kind of trite and neither here or there... But we wouldn't be talking about him if he wasn't some sort of famous.

Should there be any guidelines in expressing remorse over someone dying when you're not a fan of their work? Should you not even mention that part? How do you normally like to go about it?

And before I forget, I am sad that the world is missing another one of its citizens. I hope his family and fans find peace.
My personal rule is to just not really remark at all, unless I feel genuine remorse, like with Neil Peart for myself. I don't really feel the loss of death much. And I'm always self-conscious about the "sorry for your loss" statement, as I encounter it a lot at work. We deal with a lot of dead veterans, and thus deal with their families. And...I just don't really feel sorry for your loss. Just like I don't expect a total stranger to genuinely feel sorry for MY loss. You didn't know the guy, I didn't know the guy, so odds are we really don't feel sorry. So, I just don't really respond unless backed into a corner. To me, the sort of default, normal human expectation of "it's regrettable that a human is dead." to me, is just unspoken.
 

Agema

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Should there be any guidelines in expressing remorse over someone dying when you're not a fan of their work? Should you not even mention that part? How do you normally like to go about it?
Depends who you're speaking to. I would skip any variant of "I wasn't a fan of their work" when speaking to someone who was close to the deceased unless they specifically asked me, because it's just unnecessary and tactless when they may be feeling quite sensitive. Generally however, it's just true, and it's no insult to happen to prefer other things. Consequently it shouldn't really be a problem to just say to people who didn't know the deceased personally.

Second element is "I'm sorry he's dead". If you're not sorry and so don't feel you want to say that as it's a bit dishonest, it can be skipped over, straight to something like "Best wishes to his loved ones", which is showing sympathy and respect enough for their loss.

If you're not sorry someone is dead and their loved ones are so awful you don't even want to express sympathy for them, you're probably talking about someone despicable enough that you shouldn't be showing remorse at all. However, if for some reason it is absolutely necessary to comment, you can always go to a further remove with a generality such as "I heard about that. It's always a sad time for people to lose a close relative and friend". This is a superficial, factual recognition of loss sufficient to sound respectful, but has no personal commitment of opinion, feeling or respect to the deceased and their loved ones at all. Of course, those more socially savvy will notice the phrasing and the implication that you actually couldn't care less.
 

SupahEwok

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I don't feel a need to broadcast to the world at each and every tragedy how sorry I am for it. It only really seems to ve virtue signaling. If you feel a need to do so because you require some catharsis in the face of a/any such event, you do you. I'm not going to bother with an empty platitude, personally.
 

happyninja42

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Depends who you're speaking to. I would skip any variant of "I wasn't a fan of their work" when speaking to someone who was close to the deceased unless they specifically asked me, because it's just unnecessary and tactless when they may be feeling quite sensitive. Generally however, it's just true, and it's no insult to happen to prefer other things. Consequently it shouldn't really be a problem to just say to people who didn't know the deceased personally.

Second element is "I'm sorry he's dead". If you're not sorry and so don't feel you want to say that as it's a bit dishonest, it can be skipped over, straight to something like "Best wishes to his loved ones", which is showing sympathy and respect enough for their loss.

If you're not sorry someone is dead and their loved ones are so awful you don't even want to express sympathy for them, you're probably talking about someone despicable enough that you shouldn't be showing remorse at all. However, if for some reason it is absolutely necessary to comment, you can always go to a further remove with a generality such as "I heard about that. It's always a sad time for people to lose a close relative and friend". This is a superficial, factual recognition of loss sufficient to sound respectful, but has no personal commitment of opinion, feeling or respect to the deceased and their loved ones at all. Of course, those more socially savvy will notice the phrasing and the implication that you actually couldn't care less.
Which is pretty much why I avoid it. It's similar to the cliche "thank you for your service" comment, here in the US. I've actually asked a lot of veterans, that I work with, and as clients, if they actually like that phrase. Most don't, and find it genuinely awkward when people do that to them. For me "sorry for your loss" is just as hollow.

Maybe I'm just hyper aware of my own tone when I say it, but I always feel like they can clearly hear it in my voice, so I'm always self conscious about it. I luck out, that in my capacity at work, most are trying to get information about benefits, so I can just gloss over it and "stick to business", which is usually appreciated, as they really don't want to be reminded of the recent loss in any way, and just want to figure out next step for a benefit of some kind as a survivor.
 

Agema

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Which is pretty much why I avoid it. It's similar to the cliche "thank you for your service" comment, here in the US. I've actually asked a lot of veterans, that I work with, and as clients, if they actually like that phrase. Most don't, and find it genuinely awkward when people do that to them. For me "sorry for your loss" is just as hollow.
I get that. Circumstances dictate, and if you're at the end of a line on business where you're dealing with that a lot, there's always a risk of it seeming perfunctory so you may as well get on with business. Whatever works, really.
 

ObsidianJones

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Depends who you're speaking to. I would skip any variant of "I wasn't a fan of their work" when speaking to someone who was close to the deceased unless they specifically asked me, because it's just unnecessary and tactless when they may be feeling quite sensitive. Generally however, it's just true, and it's no insult to happen to prefer other things. Consequently it shouldn't really be a problem to just say to people who didn't know the deceased personally.

Second element is "I'm sorry he's dead". If you're not sorry and so don't feel you want to say that as it's a bit dishonest, it can be skipped over, straight to something like "Best wishes to his loved ones", which is showing sympathy and respect enough for their loss.

If you're not sorry someone is dead and their loved ones are so awful you don't even want to express sympathy for them, you're probably talking about someone despicable enough that you shouldn't be showing remorse at all. However, if for some reason it is absolutely necessary to comment, you can always go to a further remove with a generality such as "I heard about that. It's always a sad time for people to lose a close relative and friend". This is a superficial, factual recognition of loss sufficient to sound respectful, but has no personal commitment of opinion, feeling or respect to the deceased and their loved ones at all. Of course, those more socially savvy will notice the phrasing and the implication that you actually couldn't care less.
The thing is, I'm genuinely one of those goobers who does get sorry when anyone dies. Even people I vehemently hate. I was hoping to the universe every morning I woke up that Trump did not die, even if his actions took the lives of my family members. And some real life people know that about me and then it even becomes trite.

"Of course you're sorry, Obsidian. You care about everyone..."

I don't feel any real need to know a person to feel sorrow over his or her passing. While they didn't touch my lives, they touched others. Through loved ones and family, or through horrible actions that could have been made right by better choices.

It is not a picnic to be this way. But then I get added scorn heaped up on me for a.) caring and b.) having people feel it's fake because I do care about every life lost.

Feels like there's no winning sometimes.

Even still. This is who I am and I do want to express myself. I'm just trying to find a palatable way.
 

Agema

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The thing is, I'm genuinely one of those goobers who does get sorry when anyone dies. Even people I vehemently hate. I was hoping to the universe every morning I woke up that Trump did not die, even if his actions took the lives of my family members. And some real life people know that about me and then it even becomes trite.
Say what you feel - if you genuinely feel sorry for them, say so. The only point you need to be tactful is if you're not sorry.

I guess you also need to pick up from their response how much they want to talk about it, because if they don't it's really annoying to have someone doing a load of gushing about their breeavement, even if well-intentioned.