How brave do you consider yourself/Am i a coward?

[chocolate pickles]

Hey all. Now, I'm going to admit i'm a real coward: I hate roller coasters, and whilst i have managed to get through them before, I don't enjoy the horror mazes we get at parks this time of year, and am having a bit of an internal debate whether i actually want to go to one this year. I also have a curious phobia of fish and other sea creatures, which has made several family scuba trips into heart pounding experiences.

That being all being said, i wish I was less of a coward, but despite actually facing my fears (I occasionally go to theme parks in the summer, have gone to two fright nights and have gone scuba diving before), I still take no joy in these things.

So, firstly: How brave do you consider yourself, and secondarily, Do you think I'm a coward, and have you got any advice

Note: The original question was just the first one: After i wrote the opening paragraph, i kinda realized i didn't know how to link the two together. As such, this is kind of a off-topic topic with a sprinkle of advice.

 

[Nukekitten]

I don't feel like being scared of things makes you a coward, it's just being scared of something. I remember when I was learning to drive it was a terrifying experience. To the point where I was sitting at a junction with my knuckles white on the wheel trembling and being asked by the driving instructor whether I was okay. Didn't feel I was a coward, just felt utterly terrified.

Do I think you're a coward? There are fears that are worth facing, and fears that aren't. It always costs something to overcome fears, and... how do you measure how afraid you are vs how afraid someone else is, and how do you acquire courage? It seems most often to be a word people use when they'd like you to be quiet and suffer through somehow. Truth be told, I'm not really clear on what it means. I guess I'd only consider you a coward if you lacked the ability to face fear and try to push through it for something you thought was worthwhile, rather than if you simply didn't think it was worth it. You seem to have faced up to things that made you afraid before, so I wouldn't consider you one.

I don't feel like not taking joy in something makes you a coward either, plenty of people have things they don't like - and they're not cowards, they just don't care for that thing. It's fine to not enjoy something.

#

How brave do I consider myself? The thought's never really occurred to me. I don't think of myself as a particularly brave person, it's not like I go out of my way to face my fears, and I don't think of myself as a coward, it's not like my fears have total mastery of me. By and large, when I overcome something I'm scared of, I'm doing what needs to be done for one reason or another. Something that no-one else is going to do for me, or if they do they'll mess up in some way. A lot of it's to do with external factors rather than my being particularly couragous.

*she shrugs*

 

[sanquin]

If you have a few irrational fears it just makes you human. I'm afraid of heights, needles and spiders. Standard ones, I know, but still all irrational. It's unlikely I'll fall, needles are used for good on me, and spiders can at most cause an annoying pain for a while over here. Yet I'm still scared.

The thing is, what you're afraid of doesn't make you a coward. It all depends on how you deal with your fears. Do you face your fears, even if in small steps? Then I would sooner consider you brave. Plenty of people wouldn't dare doing the things they're afraid of. And since you went to fright nights and have gone scuba diving, I would consider you to be at least somewhat brave. (Hard to tell from your short description.)

I've mostly gotten over my fear of heights though, and my fear of needles has lessened. How? First I just fully accepted that I was afraid of some things, and that those fears were irrational. Then, whenever I was faced with my fear of heights at least, I went just one step further than what kept me comfortable. Just in the uncomfortable zone, before backing out again. I've been doing as such for the past 12~15 years now.

 

[shootthebandit]

scuba diving before

I consider myself to be relatively brave. Of course im scared of rational things but I dont really have any fears and im always willing to try something new. However I fucking hated scuba diving. It was the most dreadful experience of my life and I only done the practice session in the pool. Ive never felt so uncomfortable in my life until the point where he told me to take me breathing tube out underwater, when he gestured me to do it. I gestured him with a middle finger

I have respect for anyone who can put themselves through what can only be described as simulated drowning

 

[Thaluikhain]

Eh, isn't bravery the ability to overcome fear, not not feeling fear in the first place?

But, hard to tell unless you are in a situation with a real fear and a good reason to overcome it. Not doing things because you are afraid of them is just a subset of not doing things because you don't want to/won't enjoy it, surely?