I’m [blank] years old and still can’t [blank]

Xprimentyl

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Let’s have some self-deprecating fun. State your age and something you can’t do/won’t do/don’t understand that you think most able-bodied adults your age normally can/will/do.

I turned 40 in March, and this far into life, staring a mid-life crisis in the teeth, I still can’t manage to tear a sheet of saran (plastic) wrap without it tearing incorrectly or folding in on itself and turning into a balled up piece of uselessness. Seriously, I have to ask my girlfriend to do it for me like a 5-year-old when I put away leftovers; that’s what made me think of this thread. Her words: “never mind we’ve been together +4 years; you’re 40. You still can’t do this?” No, babe; no, I can’t. I’ve done it maybe twice, both times on accident. Perhaps there's an undiagnosed mental deficiency at work, I dunno; that, or I'm just an idiot.
 

Xprimentyl

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39, still can't grow hair.
Early male-pattern baldness is quite common; I've got several friends who've been thinning (or shaving bald because of thinning) since their twenties and early thirties, so I'm assuming you're speaking about hair of the pubic variety. No worries, recent studies show women are attracted to men who're cleanly shorn "down there." Also makes the goods look bigger. I personally sport the rain forest/uncharted island look; makes hunting the crabs more exciting.
 

Baffle

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Early male-pattern baldness is quite common; I've got several friends who've been thinning (or shaving bald because of thinning) since their twenties and early thirties, so I'm assuming you're speaking about hair of the pubic variety. No worries, recent studies show women are attracted to men who're cleanly shorn "down there." Also makes the goods look bigger. I personally sport the rain forest/uncharted island look; makes hunting the crabs more exciting.
No, just head hair - been shaving it since about 26. I'm a veritable hair fountain in every other part of my body. Going for the big ear-hair comb-over this year.
 
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Chimpzy

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Ok then, I'm 35 and 'm bad at ironing clothes, and afterwards neatly folding them. Oh, and terrible at cleaning windows. Luckily I managed to foist those onto my girlfriend's half of the shores. On the flipside, I absolutely roflstomp her in the kitchen, cuz she's a bad cook.
 

Dirty Hipsters

This is how we praise the sun!
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Ok then, I'm 35 and 'm bad at ironing clothes, and afterwards neatly folding them. Oh, and terrible at cleaning windows. Luckily I managed to foist those onto my girlfriend's half of the shores. On the flipside, I absolutely roflstomp her in the kitchen, cuz she's a bad cook.
I'm 30 years old, and every time I need to tie a tie I need to watch a youtube tutorial first.

To be fair, I've never worked a job where I had to wear a tie. I'm in the entertainment industry and every company I've worked at had a casual dress code. I only need to wear a tie at weddings, funerals, and job interviews, and those 3 things aren't even a yearly event for me so I've never gotten the practice of tying a tie down.
 
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Baffle

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I only need to wear a tie at weddings, funerals, and job interviews, and those 3 things aren't even a yearly event for me
Because you're young. I own one pair of 'proper shoe' shoes (actually they're New Rock boots, but they look kind of like shoes when I wear trousers) that are now called my 'funeral shoes'.

I had to wear a tie at primary and secondary school -- it's pretty much muscle memory now, even though I've only worn one for the same three events you do for the last 20 years.
 
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Casual Shinji

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I'm 33 and I still can't drive a car. Not legally or practically.
I can drive one practically, but since I can't for the life of me study anything that doesn't hold my interest, like say for a written drivers exam, I can't drive one legally (at 37).
 
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Xprimentyl

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I'm 30 years old, and every time I need to tie a tie I need to watch a youtube tutorial first.

To be fair, I've never worked a job where I had to wear a tie. I'm in the entertainment industry and every company I've worked at had a casual dress code. I only need to wear a tie at weddings, funerals, and job interviews, and those 3 things aren't even a yearly event for me so I've never gotten the practice of tying a tie down.
I went to a private high school with a dress code that required a tie, so I tied one every day for 4 years. I can basically tie a tie with my arms handcuffed behind my back. Showed my girlfriend's son how to do it in front of his own FATHER in one of the more uncomfortable and alpha moments of my life.
 

Scarim Coral

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33 and still can't ride a bike. Granted it's not like I have a spare bike to actually tried to ride it.

Also I'm not good at tying knots from ropes!
 
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Palindromemordnilap

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30 and still haven't figured out driving. Keep trying, but every time I do something buggers it for me. Universe just wants me to be a pedestrian
 

Agema

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I'm 44 and I still can't make a smooth Hollandaise sauce. Not even from a goddamn sachet.

I'm 33 and I still can't drive a car. Not legally or practically.
I only learnt when I was 30.
 

SupahEwok

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I'm 44 and I still can't make a smooth Hollandaise sauce. Not even from a goddamn sachet.
Improvised double boiler, lots of whisking, and adding the butter slowly is the trick. Frankly, I find it's a 3 handed job. Recruiting someone to drip the butter in is immensely helpful.
 

Elvis Starburst

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Man, a lot more folk in their 30's and 40's than I expected in this thread.

I'm 27 and I still can't work out any career/job direction that's above the retail level. Been trying to figure something out for a decade and I've got nothing. I've got no dreams or aspirations whatsoever