I'd make a lousy L4D survivor.

[joshuaayt]

If you want to not die in a zombie catastrophe... you'll have to be prepped beforehand. I don't mean, "Yeah, I got a whole lot of waterbottles, and some wood handy to board up windows".
I mean something more along the lines of

"Oh, poor Joshua- He never even comes up from his locked bunker anymore- I hear he has a little sunlight funnel, which he uses to grow his vegetable farm. You know he gets his water from a pipe leading directly to the ocean? He has to distill it before he can drink it."

"Wow, that's pretty intense. I wonder what he's so worried about OH GOD MY NECK PLEASE GRAAH"

Still wouldn't kill myself, besides- I've never understood killing yourself to prevent a somewhat more painful death. It's not the death that you should be worrying about, rather the aftermath. Will I go to a Heaven, of sorts? A Hell? A Hel? Nothingness?

 

[OreWaUsopp]

Thing is, geeks and all aren't really known for our resistance to physical hardship. We're not really fighters, most of us, except in games.

 

[Rednog]

People are dumb.

1. Go to northern point in world, where zombie bodies will freeze and die.
2. Go into gigantic warehouse supermarket
3. Wait it out, maybe watch the millions of DVDs or play video games in the electronics department, or rig traps for other survivors who have stumbled upon your utopia. YOU ARE KING!

If zombies were real, their rotting bodies would not be able to move fast enough to break safety glass. They are also too stupid to open doors.

Chances are I'd try and play 'White Knight' if a zombie apocalypse occurred, helping others and all that. But the above plan is a concrete one.

Too bad that electricity probably wouldn't be working since no one is working at the electric plant anymore. Thus you'd have no way to power those entertainment systems. Also without proper storage and electricity a lot of stuff would rot pretty quickly forcing you to probably have the hefty duty of cleaning out the super market, and odds are with zombies outside you'd probably have a hard time of doing that.

 

[Irony's Acolyte]

Don't worry. The likelihood of you being immune to the L4D zombies is pretty low, you probably won't even have to worry about blowing your brains out. Instead you'll more likely be infected and run around noming survivors for the rest of your days.

I want to be a hunter!

 

[Rednog]

I'm not rich but I do love my guns, and I have a few thousand rounds to go with them and a shotgun shell re-loader, several lbs of powder/boxes of empty shells/bags of shot etc.

Just remember you have a lot of "survivalists" in this country that think theyre getting prepared for a gov't takeover or invasion or something, that really dont know WTF they're even doing. Take theyre shit and run.

Do you ever get the feeling that The States is not the most 'stable' of countries to remain in when panic, chaos and mass-slaughter breaks out?

It's a joke, but still...

Though I think if there ever was such a thing as a zombie apocalypse (which there won't be) the US is probably one of the few places you would want to be. Guns galore, I mean, hell I can walk into my local sporting goods store and have a fairly large selection of hunting weapons. Your average American house has tons of sporting goods that would be pretty excellent makeshift weapons, baseball bats, hockey sticks, etc. And your average garage is filled with a multitude of tools that could be both used as weapons and for your general needs. That and the absurd about of megastores that have tons of dried food and the things listed above. I currently live in eastern europe (Poland) and judging about the lack of arms, small food stores with very little non perishable foods and a lack of closeby super stores I seriously doubt I'd have a higher chance surviving (assuming I didn't die in the massive deaths in the beginning) long term.

 

[Solo-Wing]

If it was just regular drooling-brain-eating-slow-walking zombies then ya I'd probably try to survive, but the zombies from L4D? HELLS NO!

BTW The zombies in L4D are not really zombies, they're people infected with a severely mutated, fast acting, and over powered version of rabies.

 

[LogicNProportion]

People are dumb.

1. Go to northern point in world, where zombie bodies will freeze and die.
2. Go into gigantic warehouse supermarket
3. Wait it out, maybe watch the millions of DVDs or play video games in the electronics department, or rig traps for other survivors who have stumbled upon your utopia. YOU ARE KING!

If zombies were real, their rotting bodies would not be able to move fast enough to break safety glass. They are also too stupid to open doors.

Chances are I'd try and play 'White Knight' if a zombie apocalypse occurred, helping others and all that. But the above plan is a concrete one.

Too bad that electricity probably wouldn't be working since no one is working at the electric plant anymore. Thus you'd have no way to power those entertainment systems. Also without proper storage and electricity a lot of stuff would rot pretty quickly forcing you to probably have the hefty duty of cleaning out the super market, and odds are with zombies outside you'd probably have a hard time of doing that.

What are zombies gonna do? Chew on power lines? If they're too stupid to open doors, they won't turn off my juice. Any place that lives where it snows/ices heavily (Aslaska, etc) is set up so that their power NEVER turns off. Believe me, I know.

Plus, I'm in a department store.

Bike + Generator = Power, plus I get to shed off all that zombie-hibernation weight

 

[CardinalPiggles]

Yeah when you think about it, L4D enemies arn't like your usual Zombie games, what with the special infected and the TANKS! The average person wouldn't survive long in that situation, since we don't have health bars.

Sorry, the average person wouldn't survive long in any zombie situation. I find it cute that people on here even have zombie plans, I mean, if the majority of the world couldn't survive the zombies, what's special about anyone on here?

my plan is the best, i work at a restaurant, and if i could get there me and the other people in my plan would bar the windows and doors and there is a power station right next to us, as well as 2 convenience shops, a laundry, 3 takeaway shops, as well as a train station opposite for a direct route out/in, also there is a whole new level with only 2 access points, and many rooms, also a roof for a last resort. there would be plenty of food and power to last a long time.

as you can tell im sad and have very life as ive thought this through very thoroughly

 

[OreWaUsopp]

No sadder then me. My 'Zombie plan' is to blow my own head off so they don't turn me into one.

 

[KalosCast]

People are dumb.

1. Go to northern point in world, where zombie bodies will freeze and die.
2. Go into gigantic warehouse supermarket
3. Wait it out, maybe watch the millions of DVDs or play video games in the electronics department, or rig traps for other survivors who have stumbled upon your utopia. YOU ARE KING!

Actually 3 should be "get shot in the head by one of the hundreds of other people who have that plan too and die"

There's a reason that places like Wal-Mart get cleaned out in a chaotic violent mess every time there's anything that remotely approaches being kind of like an emergency if you squint at it sideways, and that's because EVERYBODY knows that there's crap there.

 

[TimeLord]

Yeah when you think about it, L4D enemies arn't like your usual Zombie games, what with the special infected and the TANKS! The average person wouldn't survive long in that situation, since we don't have health bars.

Sorry, the average person wouldn't survive long in any zombie situation. I find it cute that people on here even have zombie plans, I mean, if the majority of the world couldn't survive the zombies, what's special about anyone on here?

Because a 'person' is smart, 'people' are dumb and panicky!

 

[Ashsaver]

Who knows? crisis brings out the best and worst in man.

you might band people together and fight against the undead,or cower in your favorite bar's basement waiting for your impending doom,or throw your friend to the undead horde hoping he might slow them down long enough for you to run away.

Me? I'll try to run to the nearest military compound.

Spoiler: There are usually more dakka in a places like these

 

[Spy_Guy]

Don't feel too bad about being a rubbish left 4 dead survivor, so was Rochelle but that didn't stop her from making it in the game.

Thank you!
That was a much needed moment of clarity. Screw Rochelle!

Now, having a plan to deal with this seems sort of pointless, I mean, what if you're not immune (assuming it's an airborne disease)... and what if the Zombie apocalypse never comes and you die having spent your entire life preparing for something that will never happen.

However, assuming it did happen, I'd like so many else here take the quick road out. Unfortunately, there's a rather strict gun control here, so unlike you people, my plan would involve a tampered gas stove some electric wire, an automatic light switch, some pliers and lots of Diazepam.

For a relatively painless death, along with cremation so that I won't have to posthumously endure the humiliation of having my body run (shamble) around and nom on brains.

 

[robodukky]

In a L4D like zombie apocalypse, I would probably just cap myself in the head before a hunter comes along to tear out my nipples while a spitter kindly melts away my exterior.

 

[Andrew_Waltfeld]

L4D - get as many people with guns together as possible together. We're probably last... 2 weeks... if that. Also head to the bloody coast. <== key. Always made me wonder why they didn't stop at a major city to get into the harbor... plenty of boats would be there, or even a small coastal town.

If it's not L4D style and your normal zombies... I give humans an 50/50 chance of surviving. It really depends upon food consumption above all else. Plenty of zombies will be killed in the cross fire of humans (at least in America) though my only real concern is the food supply. Arming everyone is fairly easy and at this type of epidemic level, any-person with a shit load of guns is going to be giving every person they meet a gun in order to fight off the hordes.

Though realistically - about 60% of the people who think they would survive it won't.

 

[UltraDeth]

It wouldn't be too hard as long as all handguns have unlimited ammo