Ideal partner: Smarter, dumber, or about on your level?

Trivun

Stabat mater dolorosa
Dec 13, 2008
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Mr.Pandah said:
Trivun said:
Mr.Pandah said:
Trivun said:
Mr.Pandah said:
Trivun said:
Mr.Pandah said:
Trivun said:
DeadSp8s said:
SimuLord said:
cool relationship thread!!!! I can't believe no one thought to do one before!!!!

My girlfriend really likes going to school, she's super-duper smart. She like to eat cookies and play with dogs (not at the same time, LOL!) When we go out to public, we usually eat sandwiches and hold hands (not at the same time, LOL!)

Sometimes, my relationship is sad. We don't cry happy tears then. But sometimes, it's happy relationship! Those tiems are fun times. One time, we tried to make a baby (but we didn't actually want the baby part, LOL!)

What about you guys? Do you like candy? Do you like soccer?
Okay, now you're just making an ass of yourself. The best thing you can do is to stop posting and just end this little argument here and now. Then everyone can carry on without the risk of people being put on probation (or worse) because of your immaturity. That sound fair to you? Because it does to me.
Don't bother Trivun, its pointless obviously. Just report and move on.
Oh, don't worry, I have done. I'm just trying to defuse the situation, if there's a chance of doing so, because frankly I don't like seeing people being put on probation or whatever if there's a chance they can see that they're being idiots and can just let things go. In an ideal world there'd be no need for moderators, after all. It's just a shame we don't live in such a world...
I agree with the idea of attempting to defuse the situation, but most of the time...its just not our place on here.

Now, what is your ideal partner, Triv? haha
Fair enough... As for my answer, I've already posted mine on Page 1 :p. But yeah, for the reasons stated in that earlier post, I'm not too fussed, though possibly around the same sort of intelligence as me. That being said, most of the girls I know IRL are fairly smart, though as I know most of these girls through university that's only to be expected :D.
haha Yeah, I just broke my rule, so no worries.

Anyways, I wish I knew more ladies of the smart variety! What university do you go to? I must visit. If they're good looking too, of course...;D
University of Leeds, in the UK. And most of the girls here are pretty damn attractive, it's just a shame that I get so few opportunities to talk to any without coming off as being creepy or weird. I mean, how are you supposed to break the ice with someone and start a real conversation? It's just so damn difficult...
Totally understandable haha

It gets so intimidating sometimes q_q You can always have a really corny pick-up line that gets them to laugh because its so bad...

Heres one, "How much does a polar bear weight?" *Blank stare* "Enough to break the ice, Hi, I'm *Insert name here*" haha
You know, that might actually work! And I'm awkward enough anyway that I could probably pull it off without any major problems, if that makes sense (it probably doesn't, but nevertheless...). Thanks, Mr.Pandah!
 

Wodan

New member
Feb 8, 2010
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I would have to say none of the above. I try and treat every woman as an unique individual. Intelligence is just one aspect of a persons personality that fits into a much larger whole. If you screened for just based on intelligence you could miss the chance of meeting an awesome individual.
 

Mr.Pandah

Pandah Extremist
Jul 20, 2008
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Trivun said:
Mr.Pandah said:
Trivun said:
Mr.Pandah said:
Trivun said:
Mr.Pandah said:
Trivun said:
Mr.Pandah said:
Trivun said:
DeadSp8s said:
SimuLord said:
cool relationship thread!!!! I can't believe no one thought to do one before!!!!

My girlfriend really likes going to school, she's super-duper smart. She like to eat cookies and play with dogs (not at the same time, LOL!) When we go out to public, we usually eat sandwiches and hold hands (not at the same time, LOL!)

Sometimes, my relationship is sad. We don't cry happy tears then. But sometimes, it's happy relationship! Those tiems are fun times. One time, we tried to make a baby (but we didn't actually want the baby part, LOL!)

What about you guys? Do you like candy? Do you like soccer?
Okay, now you're just making an ass of yourself. The best thing you can do is to stop posting and just end this little argument here and now. Then everyone can carry on without the risk of people being put on probation (or worse) because of your immaturity. That sound fair to you? Because it does to me.
Don't bother Trivun, its pointless obviously. Just report and move on.
Oh, don't worry, I have done. I'm just trying to defuse the situation, if there's a chance of doing so, because frankly I don't like seeing people being put on probation or whatever if there's a chance they can see that they're being idiots and can just let things go. In an ideal world there'd be no need for moderators, after all. It's just a shame we don't live in such a world...
I agree with the idea of attempting to defuse the situation, but most of the time...its just not our place on here.

Now, what is your ideal partner, Triv? haha
Fair enough... As for my answer, I've already posted mine on Page 1 :p. But yeah, for the reasons stated in that earlier post, I'm not too fussed, though possibly around the same sort of intelligence as me. That being said, most of the girls I know IRL are fairly smart, though as I know most of these girls through university that's only to be expected :D.
haha Yeah, I just broke my rule, so no worries.

Anyways, I wish I knew more ladies of the smart variety! What university do you go to? I must visit. If they're good looking too, of course...;D
University of Leeds, in the UK. And most of the girls here are pretty damn attractive, it's just a shame that I get so few opportunities to talk to any without coming off as being creepy or weird. I mean, how are you supposed to break the ice with someone and start a real conversation? It's just so damn difficult...
Totally understandable haha

It gets so intimidating sometimes q_q You can always have a really corny pick-up line that gets them to laugh because its so bad...

Heres one, "How much does a polar bear weight?" *Blank stare* "Enough to break the ice, Hi, I'm *Insert name here*" haha
You know, that might actually work! And I'm awkward enough anyway that I could probably pull it off without any major problems, if that makes sense (it probably doesn't, but nevertheless...). Thanks, Mr.Pandah!
...Dear God, what have I done?!

Don't use that you fool! rofl Kidding, kidding. If you ever do happen to use it, tell me how it goes! I've only used it once, and hilarity soon followed. Also, correction, its "weigh" not, "weight" obviously. Its late here and I'm extremely tired. haha
 

viranimus

Thread killer
Nov 20, 2009
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Being a guy, I would go for someone slightly less intelligent. Ive always went with equal level girls. Ive never met a female who was smarter than me. Not that they dont exist, but more to the effect I live in a backwater hillbilly town.

What I realized is it doesnt matter how much smarter you are than your girl, for some reason shes always going to see you as a dumbass.
 
Sep 14, 2009
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honestly it depends girl to girl, i've dated all of the above and i've broken up with all of the above, all for different reasons.

i just met a girl recently who doesn't look the part but she is actually quite smart, (me personally, i like a girl who can take a joke and can fire one back) and she more than fills the part, i was actually caught speechless the other night, i ended up cracking a huge grin about it later on but i might just keep this girl around.

so all of the above, but for RIGHT now on the spot, i will say same level of intelligence as me (i'd like to think that i am somewhat smart, otherwise i dont know what the hell im doing in the engineering program at my college)
 

Mr.Pandah

Pandah Extremist
Jul 20, 2008
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viranimus said:
Being a guy, I would go for someone slightly less intelligent. Ive always went with equal level girls. Ive never met a female who was smarter than me. Not that they dont exist, but more to the effect I live in a backwater hillbilly town.

What I realized is it doesnt matter how much smarter you are than your girl, for some reason shes always going to see you as a dumbass.
I just burst out laughing at that last part. So true. So. freakin'. true.
 

Hader

New member
Jul 7, 2010
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I think it is safe to say that any partner of mine wouldn't ask a question such as this in the first place. There is so much more to any relationship, not such petty grievances.
 

infohippie

New member
Oct 1, 2009
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I'm happy with a girl who is any of those, smarter, less intelligent, or the same as me. Just so long as she isn't dumb as a box of rocks. And has a huge pair of And has a kind, sweet personality.
 

TheStatutoryApe

New member
May 22, 2010
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Probably as smart or smarter. I have a thing for geeky women. If I met a woman who could beat me at chess I just might ask her to marry me.
 

Vault101

I'm in your mind fuzz
Sep 26, 2010
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DeadSp8s said:
I would prefer the same. Too smart and she would judge me for playing video games instead of faggy reading. However, if she was smarter and not a judgmental ***** whore, I wouldn't really care. Slightly dumber, I'd feel good about. Much dumber, no thanks.

This works for everyone. /thread
faggy reading?.....whats that? also "judgemental ***** whore" might be a little overkill don't you think?
 

DMonkey

New member
Nov 29, 2009
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I'm pretty dumb. I fully admit that. I got some great qualities, just think power isn't one of them. I need, and HAVE, a chick who makes up for that. My girl is brilliant. She has foresight AND hindsight (I think she is secretly with the X-Men). Two qualities I lack. She also knows when its not a good idea to stick something into something else. Again, not something I am known for. What I DO have is the ability to do stuff when told, to the letter, and make shit happen. Basically a brain dead yes-man. But with a heart. Mostly a brain-dead yes man. But that is what my know-it-all girlfriend needs, and wants. She gets a tool, and I get sex, and not having to think past breakfast. Win win!
 

VivaciousDeimos

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May 1, 2010
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viranimus said:
What I realized is it doesnt matter how much smarter you are than your girl, for some reason shes always going to see you as a dumbass.
Gotta say, that made me snort into my soda a lil bit. Mostly because it's true.

As for the type of guys I look for...honestly it's really a toss up. I don't have a problem with a guy being smarter than me as long as he's not condescending about it. Equal intelligence would probably be the best choice, just so we can have a good conversation without either party feeling lost. As for dumber guys....well, I have to admit that there is a certain flavor of dumb guy that I find adorably endearing and attractive. Like puppies. I think it's when they don't achieve as much academically as I do, but still have common sense and street smarts, that I'm drawn in.
 

siddif

New member
Aug 11, 2009
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Personally id like someone on the same intelligence level as myself and preferably with similar interests so we can discuss things.
I would feel very insecure around a smarter woman though i think part of me would love it too - partially for the challenge and partially so i can learn something new and interesting.

I don't mean to seem egotistical but a lot of the women i have dated have been less intelligent than me which has lead to frustration at time (though not huge arguments) personally I like to think I have nothing against less academic people though id prefer if they were interested in learning new things or at least hear my piece and id listen to theirs - nothing wrong with intelligence levels though i despise blind ignorance and inability to listen in a relationship especially.

EDIT: After thinking I've realised that the smart girls i like are too smart to date me in the first place (not due to lack of trying now) ='(
 

Wakefield

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Aug 3, 2009
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Smarter then me. I like smart guys, I don't even care if they're outrageously smarter then me.
 

JC123

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Apr 10, 2008
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DeadSp8s said:
Mr.Pandah said:
defuse the situation
defuse means to literally remove the fuse from something, something like a bomb. try diffuse next time you want to mellow out a situation. you guys better find some dumb girls if you wanna be the smarter half. know what i'm saiyan?
Your attitude is a bomb that is going to explode and derail this thread. The usage is correct. You're either a poor troll or truly believe you're correct and either way, you should really bring down your confidence levels, they're aren't deserved.


Hader said:
I think it is safe to say that any partner of mine wouldn't ask a question such as this in the first place. There is so much more to any relationship, not such petty grievances.
Kortney said:
There is this weird recurring notion that I find kind of creepy about the Escapist. It sounds like you are looking for a new dog to own. Do I want my partner to be smarter or "dumber" than me? Wow. I don't care. As long as I can hold a conversation and (more importantly) as long as I can fall in love with them then the rest is irrelevant.

Some "stupid" people I know are incredibly beautiful people and some of the best company I could ever hope to have. Same goes for some "smarter" people. Something I definitely would not like in a parter, is the type that goes around judging other people's intelligence.
And here we have two individuals who have either neither experienced an adult relationship, or fear that they're the "dumb" one in theirs. Relationship psychology - how you feel about your partner's intelligence (and personality in general) will measure how you fit with them. Some like to feel like equals, others to nurture or be nurtured. If they don't meet your criteria, your expectations will not match reality and the relationship will fail unless they change. It's not sexist, demeaning or unrealistic to have a "type." It's the reality of attraction. Intelligence is nothing more than another feature we pick and choose our partners from, and if anything, I respect picking a partner by intelligence more than I do picking by hair colour, body type, skin colour, or any other widely accepted factor.

Personally, my first girlfriend was smart enough to be in my courses at college, but for some reason her behaviour had me feeling like a teacher, and I struggled to respect her because of it. One in the middle was on par with myself, but had to act superior. We'd have clashes of opinion and rather than polite debate, she would act as if I couldn't possibly understand her, and she must be right. This included her trying to debate material from my own degree, which she had never studied. A lot of that came down to her nature (she was rather rebellious against the "norm," including being vegan), and the differences between us (she was 9 years my senior).

My missus fits me perfectly. She's smart, and willing to tell me I'm wrong, but never rudely, and to take criticism if she's wrong. We both teach each other things, I never look down on her or up to her. Equality in both actuality and how we treat each other is what works for us.
 

Death God

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Jul 6, 2010
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I don't care myself but if I had to pick one, I would say smarter. I like to carry an intelligent conversation and there are a lot of these I still don't know. So to be smarter is the better choice.
Edit: But not "too" smart. I don't want an arrogant wife, just a smart and understanding one.
 

Plurralbles

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Jan 12, 2010
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The girl I really like went on this long speech about all the awards she's gotten in her life and how she had hte opportunity to get a full ride at multiple schools.

I want to live up to her accomplishments, therefore, I want to have her above me because that'll whip me into doing something about my own life.

At this point, I suck. I suck major amounts at life.