If You Were Admin of the Entire Internet ...

Mar 9, 2010
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The Virgo said:
Libraries have the same "shit" that you can find on Wikipedia. And it gets you off your ass and into the open air. Besides, wikipedia can be altered by anybody. And what do you have against books? I read the second paragraph you posted and it feels like the wikipedia creator talking to me. Everything you can find on wikipedia you can find in a book, only more comprehensive. It's the same thing.
Yeah, but libraries don't have a full catalogue of every subject to exist, they have a selection of books they bought at the beginning of the 90s, the most popular fiction and the books that nobody wants and have donated.

I love books, in fact. Most of what I asked for and got for Christmas this year were books. But the internet has more and it's perfect for learning; you can find studies, e-books and articles on the subject you want in a matter of minutes. I just find I don't get bogged down in all the information that's available if I read a book.

I don't know. Life was so much simpler when, if someone was being a jerk (like, uh, you?), you could just punch them in the face. Now, you have to type out something.
Please, don't kid yourself.

And this is where I stop reading. You're obviously just trying to flame me and have obviously never gotten outside. Do it. Do something you've never done before: Turn off the computer, walk outside and take a deep breath. I promise you that lack of internet connection won't kill you. It's a DSL cable, not an umbilical cord. Go to a concert. (I'm going to see Roger Waters perform The Wall live later this year! :D And I know it'll be better than watching it from a computer screen.) Find a girl (if you're a straight guy). Go for a walk somewhere, anywhere! Read a book. You'll see that it's no different from a wikipedia article, except that you can trust it better!

Everything that's on the internet can be found by not being stuck in front of a computer screen. And you know what? When you do, you'll find that the world doesn't 100% function because of the internet. There still is an existence beyond the screen in front of your eyes.

Try it. You'll thank me later.
Well I'm not trying to flame you, I'm just putting actual emotion into my posts, you've been doing it too and it's a nice change of pace from the robotic responses that try not to step on anyone's toes that you get from this community.

Thanks, I had no idea that there was a world away from the computer screen. You're definitely on my list of people I have to validate myself to, though. Once I finally get past all my fears of the outside I'll catch a flight over to the US and we can do all of these things.
 

00slash00

New member
Dec 29, 2009
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i would ban from the internet, anyone who makes an arrow to the knee joke. seriously, that wasnt funny to begin with and it has just gotten annoying
 

The Funslinger

Corporate Splooge
Sep 12, 2010
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Robert632 said:
The Virgo said:
Robert632 said:
The Virgo said:
I've yet to meet a MLP fan who, on forums, didn't have a MLP avatar and, on TF2, as an example, didn't have an MLP spray.

I'm sure those people exist, but I've yet to meet one.
Congrats. You've now met one.
Greetings! :) I'm glad I've now met one. And, because you enjoy it without showing your love of it everywhere, I respect you liking the show and you may enjoy it in peace.

See how easy life is?
Huh. Y'know I meant to come across as offended, right? Just making sure that's clear.
What annoys me is when people ***** about bronies expressing their fandom through avatars... avatars are FOR personalizing to something you enjoy. Half the avatars on here express some form of fandom, or another (my own showing my love of Fallout) his complaint would be valid if these were goatsee avatars, or something. The gist of the statement seems to be "you're allowed to like My Little Pony, but you're not allowed to express it in the ways anyone else on the internet would express their liking for something.

I may not be a Brony, but my best friend on the Escapist is, and he's in all probability the nicest guy on here. All he uses are brony avatars, but it never bothers anyone. You've probably heard of Caramel Frappe on this website, I should imagine...
 

BiscuitTrouser

Elite Member
May 19, 2008
2,860
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The Virgo said:
And this is where I stop reading. You're obviously just trying to flame me and have obviously never gotten outside. Do it. Do something you've never done before: Turn off the computer, walk outside and take a deep breath. I promise you that lack of internet connection won't kill you. It's a DSL cable, not an umbilical cord. Go to a concert. (I'm going to see Roger Waters perform The Wall live later this year! :D And I know it'll be better than watching it from a computer screen.) Find a girl (if you're a straight guy). Go for a walk somewhere, anywhere! Read a book. You'll see that it's no different from a wikipedia article, except that you can trust it better!

Everything that's on the internet can be found by not being stuck in front of a computer screen. And you know what? When you do, you'll find that the world doesn't 100% function because of the internet. There still is an existence beyond the screen in front of your eyes.

Try it. You'll thank me later.
Am i allowed to think the internet is awesome, prefer its usage to libraries, and wonder at the miricle that is world wide connection all at once and still have a life? Im just asking, i already do but you make it sound like we cant have one or the other. I just wanted to make sure it was cool with you, and show you this awesome place called middle ground, where we enjoy both libraries and internet despite the fact the internet is an amazing tool and superior to every library ive been to for finding general purpose information quickly. For research i use books.

Imagine if all post was hand delivered! Or air delivered, you think wed have any idea whats REALLY happening in china without internet? The internet is amazing and is the most brilliant tool so far known to man. Imagine how medicine, science, general knowlegde would suffer without the internet to coalate and share results world wide in a SECOND. How would you suggest we do it without the internet quickly, immediately and efficiently. But i guess youre right, they survived before the internet. Its obviously prudent then to wait an extra month for that aids vaccine data to coalate then using air mail rather than publishing it online. Im allowed to think that without being a no life screen hugger. Goddam people can we ever have anything that isnt bizare absolute extremes?

Unrealated

Duffeknol said:
EDIT: permaban every brony and everyone with a pony avatar.

New idea, it take everyone that doesnt seem to understand this

http://www.theonion.com/articles/man-who-enjoys-thing-informed-he-is-wrong,7057/

Is not a serious point of view. And is in fact stupid as hell.

Anyone with this attitude


instant perma ban. No ones asking you to like this shit but cmon people, opinions differ and its absolutely fine.
 

ZeroMachine

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Oct 11, 2008
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The Virgo said:
ZeroMachine said:
The Virgo said:
Freezy_Breezy said:
I like that if I don't like MovieBob, there's something wrong, but if someone likes 4chan, they're scum. You realise 4chan is more than just /b/, right?
I don't care, actually. /b/, /v/, /whatever/ it's all the same to me.
You know, replace some words in your post and the post you replied to, and it'd be called "racism".
I can change a few words in a Disney cartoon and it will sound like extremely racist. But that doesn't mean that Walt was a racist or intended for his cartoon to be racist.

I'm not racist, I just hate 4Chan. And 4Chan is not a group of people that have feelings and emotions ... it is a website.

Also, why does everybody keep defending it? If you love it so much, why don't you declare it to be your God, build "The Church of the Holy 4Chan" and get it over with? And you can have statues of your saints, like St. Okay Guy, St. Furry, St. Troll ... XD

ZeroMachine said:
Plus, ignoring facts in order to instill your own narrow viewpoints on a culture you obviously have issues with...

I believe that can be called a dictatorship.
Sigh ... you know, I used to be open minded. Really. I would debate on issues to get the full scope of things and even change my opinion if I was wrong. I was like that for many years ... and then, one day, I can't even remember when, I realized that I wasn't happy having to be agreeable. And then, that lead to the person you see now.

Now, sometimes I will still have a logical debate with people and change my viewpoints accordingly, but not as much as I used to. And especially not when it comes to 4Chan.

You can continue to argue that 4Chan is okay, but I'm not going to change my mind. So there. Let's end this before this erupts into another flame war. :)
Multiple straw man arguments followed by trying to rationalize self imposed ignorance. And I can see that you think you're better than everyone else that defends the positive aspects of the internet because "they haven't been outside".

You're a very unpleasant person.
 

anthony87

New member
Aug 13, 2009
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If I was the internet admin I'd probably reduce the privileges of people who are pricks to other people for the sake of being a prick. Those people who'll make a post knowing full well that it'll generate a reaction.

Be a prick for a reason by all means but doing it for no reason just makes you a prick.
 

Supah

New member
Oct 22, 2011
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Anything using Mac technology (including Iphones and Ipads etc) will be banned from my interwebs.

Furthermore the trolls will bow to me or be banned!
 

ckam

Make America Great For Who?
Oct 8, 2008
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Turn off every single child porn and abusive porn sites ever. Other than that ... I leave to the rest of humanity.
 

Twilight_guy

Sight, Sound, and Mind
Nov 24, 2008
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Same thing I'd do if I was God... nothing special and act as if I never had the power. Absolute power corrupts absolutely, Who am I to judge the entire internet?, and the internet should not be censored by anyone or subject to the whims of anyone.
 

redisforever

New member
Oct 5, 2009
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The Virgo said:
I don't EA. In fact, many fond memories from my childhood came from games like The Sims, Command and Conquer: Red Alert 2, Flight Simulator 2, Sim Theme Park and many other games they published. I just hate Origin.

In fact, that's the only reason I didn't buy Battlefield 3 because I REALLY wanted that game. So, I just want Origin gone so I can play their stuff. Simple enough. <:-/
Ah, Red Alert 2, The Sims, better days, when games were simply games.
Also, I didn't buy Battlefield 3 for that same reason, on PC that is. And the other being I couldn't run it. So, I instead have it on PS3. And my god, the online is so much awesome, and I say that as a person who hates more multiplayer with a burning passion. Brings back memories of 1942.


OT: Make a list, check it twice, and start delivering coal (bans) to evil places, like 4Chan, and murder SOPA as hard as I can.
 

The Virgo

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Jul 21, 2011
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ZeroMachine said:
Multiple straw man arguments followed by trying to rationalize self imposed ignorance. And I can see that you think you're better than everyone else that defends the positive aspects of the internet because "they haven't been outside".
No, that guy was not trying to defend positive aspects of the internet, he was trying to tell me how, basically, the internet is vital and that everything outside of it is shit. If you actually read what he said rather than stick up for him blindly to try and fight me, you would see it.

Now, I'm not going to turn this into a flame war. I don't want that and the mods don't want. So, go to 4Chan, which is apparently such a lovely place and do not bother trying to start an argument with me. Besides, there are a lot of people here saying the same thing about 4Chan. Yet, you ignore them and concentrate on me? The logic baffles me ...
 

Leviathan_

New member
Jan 2, 2009
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Nothing.

How incredibly stupid of anyone to moderate the Internet. The best and funniest forums and websites are the ones that are the least moderated. Just imagine a world where everything on the Internet was moderated like the Escapist is. How boring would that be.
 

KrossBillNye

New member
Jan 25, 2010
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The Internet.

The only winning move is not to play.

Me thinks that a lot of you need to cool down and stop trolling each other. Please be a little more civil.
 
May 5, 2010
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1. No more memes. If you tell the same joke more then, say, 5 times, then you are banned from the internet for 6 months. And even after that, you still have to refile the proper paperwork. This brings us to...

2. No more anonymity. Any site that involves communication between two or more human beings will now require the same amount of personal information as a job interview. Your information will not be made public if you don't want it to be, but you are still held responsible for your online actions. Which brings us to...

3. Each member of the internet will have an "Internet Portfolio" included in their personal information, which will consist of every post you have ever made anywhere. NOTE: This includes only posts, or messages that are public anyway. Whatever you type into a search bar is still your business, if you get my meaning.

4. Making a post in a forum has a 3 minute waiting period. This will cause many people to simply keep two tabs open to do other things while they wait, but hopefully a few will read what they wrote, and maybe think over a bit before posting.
(I don't like doing this, but I want to point out that the above rules are not meant to be taken seriously.)

SneeringCanuck said:
The Virgo said:
SneeringCanuck said:
Also, fuck yo copyrights and whatnot, FREE SHIT FOR EVERYONE.
I saved YOU for last.

As a capitalist, businessman and someone who works in an industry which suffers from piracy, I would like to inform you that THAT SHIT DOESN'T HAPPEN THAT WAY.

Everything can't be free, at least not in the kind of society we live in. And also, what your dumb ass doesn't realize, copyrights and "whatnot" are highly important. It tries to prevent slobs like you from profiting from the work of others.
1. How do I 'profit' from downloading shit for free (books, movies etc), if I don't sell them?
2. Care to explain how SHIT HAPPENS THAT WAY?
3. Given your current health bar and insults, my report will probably give you a nice long suspension/ban. Enjoy.
You profit because you got something for free, obviously. Let's say you're planning on getting a song from the internet. If you buy it, you spend a dollar and in return get the song. You're at net zero, you lost a dollar but (in theory) have gained a product that is worth a dollar. That's how economics works. But if you pirate it, you get the song and get to keep your dollar. So you've profited because you started out with just a dollar, but now you have both a dollar AND a free song. You have more then you started with, therefore, you profited.

PS: Points "1" and "2" of your post are kinda redundant, they're both expressing exactly the same thought. Also, given the Escapist's opinion of piracy, you far more likely to end up with a suspension then the other guy.
 

The Virgo

New member
Jul 21, 2011
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redisforever said:
Ah, Red Alert 2, The Sims, better days, when games were simply games

Also, I didn't buy Battlefield 3 for that same reason, on PC that is. And the other being I couldn't run it. So, I instead have it on PS3. And my god, the online is so much awesome, and I say that as a person who hates more multiplayer with a burning passion. Brings back memories of 1942.
Those were good games, before EA become some big, soulless company that realized it could ship The Sims 3 with the barest minimum of stuff with the texture editor as an excuse for the lack of stuff and made Red Alert 3 without ... the charm, I guess. There's just something about moving pixelated 2D soldiers and tanks to destroy 2D bases ... There's just something great about those lack of graphics.
 

Hawk eye1466

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May 31, 2010
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I'd have every internet enabled phone repeatedly call people I don't like and spam their computers with stupid ads then ban them from their favorite sites randomly but then send them a message saying it was an accident your now unbanned. Then I guess I'd just change their desktop wallpaper or make their computer's homepage some porn site, usually just little things to make them regret pissing me off.
 

TerribleAssassin

New member
Apr 11, 2010
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Banhammer. Lots of it.

Here of the list of people I'd ban hammer...


about 0:30, that is the list of people I would banhammer.

And I might turn every link on the internet into a Rick Roll, for the fun of it.
 

Duffeknol

New member
Aug 28, 2010
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BiscuitTrouser said:
Duffeknol said:
EDIT: permaban every brony and everyone with a pony avatar.

New idea, it take everyone that doesnt seem to understand this

http://www.theonion.com/articles/man-who-enjoys-thing-informed-he-is-wrong,7057/

Is not a serious point of view. And is in fact stupid as hell.

Anyone with this attitude


instant perma ban. No ones asking you to like this shit but cmon people, opinions differ and its absolutely fine.
Hey, the thread allowed me to enjoy a power-fantasy, and I'm one of those few people with enough self-knowledge I fully realize I would abuse the living shit out of that power and become an absolute dictator.
 

joe-h2o

The name's Bond... Hydrogen Bond
Oct 23, 2011
230
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Alkaline said:
joe-h2o said:
It's funny that you joined the site in March 2011, and have the "watched 100 ZP videos" badge, yet claim it stopped being funny a long time ago.

Were you forced to watch 100 of them in 9 months?

Just curious! No disrespect meant or anything. I mean you might have been lurking long before then, but then if you think they were past their best a long time ago, your badges seem to suggest you've kept watching.
My brother watches it with my account logged in.
Genius excuse! Masterstroke!

I'm going to have to try that with all the Nun Porn and videos of women crushing fruit with their bare feet on my computer.

Err, I mean back episodes of Murder She Wrote. No wait, Diagnosis Murder....