Is being a gentlemen sexist?

[Fatboy_41]

Yea, this has been done to death.

My views on the matter though... If you go out of your way to treat a woman differently to a man, it is sexist. It that a bad thing though? Not always. I am courteous to most people in general, however I will ALWAYS be respectful to women unless given reason not to be. A woman accusing me of being sexist in a negative way is definitely reason enough to stop extending any respect toward her.

 

[Trippy Turtle]

Its not sexist but it not 'equal'. Its just easier to ignore everyone when they bring up the ist words though.

It is sexist simply because it is discrimination.

But yeah, if you want to be a racist, sexist, utterly unethical person ignoring words that end in 'ist' sounds like a grand way to go.

So I its unethical of me not to make a a huge deal over who opens the door? I'm so sorry. I'll try to be more of a nuisance.

Oh sorry, I guess you missed the obvious implication that it was because they're girls. Unless for some reason you think he was the only guy there or something. Ready to correct that statement or is that kind of integrity too much to ask from the pro-'gentleman' side?

When did I say I was pro gentleman side? My post was leaning more to not being a gentlemen to avoid idiots complaining about it.

It that counts as discrimination is it sexist they they call us men rather then humans?

If you like non sequiturs so much does that mean that you just admitted to hating all women?[/quote]I have no idea what sequiturs means so it might explain the rest of this completely stupid sentence. Even people on the escapist who love twisting my words would have a hard time coming to that conclusion.
[sub] Stupid quotes[/sub]

 

[neoontime]

Well, my rule is if I'm the first or close in, I hold the door for anyone after me. Although, being gentlemanly only to women does appear sexist.

 

[Racecarlock]

Slam the door in her face. You and I both know very well that you were just trying be nice and was not implying weakness or dependence on her part. It's just common fucking courtesy, and she's a total *****. Next time, just let the door close and see how much she loves her independence.

 

[Mayamellissa]

What a stupid chick... It wasn't sexist at all. Do you realize how many times I would appreciate someone opening the door for me? I usually have like 15,000 things I am juggling so what you did (although I know you were just being polite) was a good thing. Sounds like she was embracing a hard core feminist/ self sufficient crap side that I can't even understand.

 

[Bat Vader]

What nonsense is this?

Of course it's not sexist, you were just being polite. You may well have been a gentleman at the same time.

Men and women are not the same so should not be treated the same. If you see a guy struggling with a heavy suitcase are you going to help? Not unless it's really, really big/heavy or he is small. But you'd more readily help a woman because she's most likely not as strong as you are, and that's just a fact. Similarly men tend to be taller than women. Are you going to help a woman reach for something more often than a man? Yes, because it's just stats on height difference.

When you flip being a gentleman over into believing it's being sexist you've messed up. There is a world of difference between being a gentleman and being condescending.

If a woman berates you for being a gentleman then it's time to stop being a gentleman to her, and her alone, because she's obviously too much of an idiot to deserve it.

because you think women are weaker

They are, in general. They also have ladybits, in general, and neither of these are up for debate in the land of logic.

If I see someone struggling with a heavy suitcase I would ask them if they need help. It doesn't matter if they are a man or a woman. If they need help I am going to offer to help them.

 

[Luna]

It is technically sexist... but that doesn't mean its wrong.


However since we live in a society where men and woman have equal rights, and perhaps women possibly have more rights than men, I see no reason for a man to have an obligation to be a gentleman.

womenwantequalitynowtheyhaveit.jpg

 

[Vanitas likes Bubbles]

It is sexist but isn't the bad kind of sexism (Y'know the "women should belong in the kitchen and make sammiches" sexism). You're probably taught to think that women need protecting and that isn't necessarily a bad thing.

 

[Subjective Effect]

Definition of sexism. What nonsense is this (bolded parts). Please don't say something's not something when it clearly is.

Oh, so it's sexist for a woman to be reminded by her family doctor that she is due a smear test because they don't do the same for her husband is it?

Get out.

 

[Sparrow]

I've always treated men and women differently, and the idea that I should treat them both exactly the same is ridiculous to me. My male friends like to talk about stuff like plowing hot girls, my female friends really don't like to speak about stuff like that. Sure, it's a stereotype but in my case (and, I'd guess a lot of other peoples too) it just happens to be true.

So, yeah. The idea that men and women should be treated exactly the same is stupid to me, because men and women aren't the same. Then again, it's not exactly like every guy friend I have likes to talk about their sexual conquests of women. Most do, though. It's probably because of this thing they have called a penis.

I think what I'm trying to say is you shouldn't treat people the same or differently because of their sex. You should treat people how they want to be treated. Trying too hard to treat men and women equally is stupid and will only distance you from people. And yeah, some women do want you to open the door for them. Some women don't. You're not going to know until you've already opened the door for them, or not opened the door for them. Either way you're going to piss someone off.

...actually, I think what I'm really trying to say is fuck people.

 

[Subjective Effect]

I was with you right up to the last sentence!

 

[gilgamesh310]

I bet that same girl would moan if she had to carry a heavy object if there was a man around or if a she was on a date and the guy didn't pay for the meal and stuff like that. Most women who ***** about sexism are usually just hypocrites that hold double standards.

 

[Meatspinner]

No, it just means that you are checking for werewolves. It's what people did in the middle ages. If they got angry about it, it means that you have found a savage beast.

 

[Mariahsyn]

I rather like it when someone is polite enough to hold the door for me. I'm secure enough in my personal independence where I take such an act as the courtesy that it is and I would actually think that the individual who started a problem more than likely has her own personal set of deep-rooted issues regarding men. (Either that or she is just a b**ch, it happens)

So please take it from me that more often than not you are going to get a smile and even a thank you. However you could also take note that polite manners of any sort are becoming something of a lost art as the number of ignorant sub-human morons who care about nothing but themselves is on the rise and leaving those who possess a well-rounded sense of themselves and the world around them in the minority.

But I digress.

It is a very good thing to be polite and sociable.

Don't let those with issues turn you away from that goodness because to do otherwise would be to let them win and drag you down to their level.

Don't let the idiots win!

 

[Phasmal]

Treat a woman nice, you're a horrible person. Treat a woman bad, you're a horrible person. Bitches need to make up their minds.

Well I guess we know which camp you're in.

-
OT:

Honestly, how hard is it to to treat people like people?
First off, none of us were there so making a judgement on this is just silly `here, rant about hypothetical women` type stuff. For all we know he could have been standing there with a `Look at me opening this door for you` smug-git face. For all we know he could just be making shit up to troll.

This happens, but it also happens the other way. I dont say things like:

`I opened this door for a guy and he didn't walk through it; therefore he was a dumb misogynist bastard and I should have slammed it in his face. Men can't make up their mind what they want.`

 

[phantasmalWordsmith]

If you ask me, there's a right way and a wrong way to go about it. Keep an eye on whether you're being helpful or you're being patronising and make sure you're doing it for the right reasons.

For me, being a gentleman is just second nature and general etiquette. If someone thinks its sexist, they can if they want but I know that I'm not trying to be sexist, I'm just being polite.