Lady Throws Wii at Boyfriend, Hilarity and Jailtime Ensues

Greg Tito

PR for Dungeons & Dragons
Sep 29, 2005
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Lady Throws Wii at Boyfriend, Hilarity and Jailtime Ensues



A woman was arrested and jailed this week for allegedly throwing a Wii console at her boyfriend's face.

Rebecca Varina Sloskowski, 31 years old, was arrested and jailed on Monday January 10th under second-degree assault charges and eventually jailed for tossing the Wii. There is no word whether Sloskowski's boyfriend wants to return to his lover's Hillsboro, Oregon home about ten miles west of Portland, or whether he will press charges.

It's an old story really, one that we've heard so many times that I'm sure you can recite it along with me. A man loves a woman. The woman becomes intoxicated and the man leaves the house to give her time to calm down and sober up.

When he returns four hours later, the woman is still raving bat-shit crazy angry and screams at him, shoving him against the wall. She then starts throwing whatever she can at him before her hand rests on the Wii console. She then hurls it at the man, chipping two teeth and cutting his lip. Same old story right?

Perhaps Nintendo should put safety straps on the Wii console in addition to the strap that comes with Wii Remotes. Or perhaps the boyfriend should buy her one of these [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/103155-Wii-Remote-Finally-Modded-Into-a-Vibrating-Sex-Toy]?

Source: The Hillsboro Argus [http://www.oregonlive.com/argus/index.ssf/2011/01/wii_cant_control_this.html]



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SimuLord

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Aug 20, 2008
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Does Fark have "jailarity ensues" copyrighted yet? Because otherwise there's no excuse---NONE---for not putting that into the headline.
 

Booze Zombie

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Dec 8, 2007
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"One of these" might have resulted in the headline "man has Wii sex toy shoved in one ear and out the other".
 

IamSofaKingRaw

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Jun 28, 2010
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Did it lag midway trough the air?

If it was the PS Move it would have been lag free from the time she threw it to the point of contact.

Playstation. It Does Everything.
 

The Imp

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Nov 9, 2009
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See why the PC would be a better choice for a gaming device? Because she couldn't lift and throw a 15Kg tower. :D
 

Reagus

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Apr 1, 2009
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If it was a man who threw a Wii at his girlfriend i'm pretty sure the word "hilarity" wouldn't be in the title.

Just saying...
 

Gizmo007666

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Nov 12, 2009
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Am I the only one that wants to know if the Wii still worked after having been thrown? Be a decent test to see how sturdy it is in comparison to the other consoles xD
 

Trucken

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Jan 26, 2009
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The thing looks like a brick and apparently it can double as a brick. Amazing!
 

Jaebird

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Aug 19, 2008
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All I can think about is whether this all started because the guy accidentally overwritten one of her saved games.
 

Cakes

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Aug 26, 2009
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Reagus said:
If it was a man who threw a Wii at his girlfriend i'm pretty sure the word "hilarity" wouldn't be in the title.

Just saying...
I was thinking the same.
 

Deef

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Mar 11, 2009
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IamSofaKingRaw said:
Did it lag midway trough the air?

If it was the PS Move it would have been lag free from the time she threw it to the point of contact.

Playstation. It Does Everything.
If I were Sony I would hire you as a marketing team leader.
 

therandombear

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Sep 28, 2009
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Greg Tito said:
When he returns four hours later, the woman is still raving bat-shit crazy angry and screams at him, shoving him against eh wall. She then starts throwing whatever she can at him before her hand rests on the Wii console. She then hurls it at the man, chipping two teeth and cutting his lip. Same old story right?
You appear to have lost a T in the process of writing this article. Did Kross take it from you?
 

aldowyn

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Mar 1, 2010
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therandombear said:
Greg Tito said:
When he returns four hours later, the woman is still raving bat-shit crazy angry and screams at him, shoving him against eh wall. She then starts throwing whatever she can at him before her hand rests on the Wii console. She then hurls it at the man, chipping two teeth and cutting his lip. Same old story right?
You appear to have lost a T in the process of writing this article. Did Kross take it from you?
The letters left are in the wrong order, too :p


Anyway... Yeah, a Wii is a lot easier to throw than a PS3 or 360. I was amazed by how big the 360 was when I got it...
 

fletch_talon

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Nov 6, 2008
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Cakes said:
Reagus said:
If it was a man who threw a Wii at his girlfriend i'm pretty sure the word "hilarity" wouldn't be in the title.

Just saying...
I was thinking the same.
As was I.
I came here expecting a story about domestic violence, perhaps with some ironic twist.
I got the domestic violence bit, but....