Lawsuit Demands Porn Filters For All Apple Products

Lazy Kitty

Evil
May 1, 2009
20,147
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Seriously, if he wants a porn filter, that's software he has to install himself.
Like every other kind of software.

And the decision to look at porn or not is his his responsibility as well.
It's called "self-control".
 

Fireprufe15

New member
Nov 10, 2011
177
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Lol, the legal document is comedy gold. My favorite line so far: Apple products are the superceding cause of sexual addictions and dysfunctions, not the porn makers.

Also, I like how he seems to think Apple products are the superceding devices for connecting to the net.
 

Infernal Lawyer

New member
Jan 28, 2013
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Great. Just fucking great. It was bad enough when parents insisted that it wasn't their responsibility to monitor what their own kids do with media (kids playing GTA? Must be Rockstar's fault), and now the adults expect to be molly-coddled. I mean, come fucking ON, some people are trying to lobby for pro-choice and against corporate bullshit here (see Xbone kerfuffle), we don't need fucking morons like these up and saying "We have no sense of responsibility for our families, our kids or ourselves! Save us with your totalitarian laws, oh mighty governments and corporations! (Slippery slope I know, but you get the point)
 

Froggy Slayer

New member
Jul 13, 2012
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He's addicted to porn, and so he's using his position as a lawyer to blame everyone else for his own inability to stop jerking it?

HAHA. OH WOW!
 

Tanis

The Last Albino
Aug 30, 2010
5,264
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How much you wanna bet is a Neo-Con Christian Republican.

The same types that want to force a women to go though mental and sexual assaults if they want an abortion.
Who think 'the pill' is evil, but Viagra is fine.

The same kind of backwards, inbreed, neanderthals who think gun control doesn't work because there will be a black market but think banning abortion will stop all abortions.

This guy is a complete moron and I hope he's disbarred for this.
 

Abomination

New member
Dec 17, 2012
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I hope it goes to court, I hope he's asked to make a statement, then I hope the judge nails him (figuratively) with a massive fine for wasting the court's time.
 

J Tyran

New member
Dec 15, 2011
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Don't Apple pretty much hate adult content anyway? They might be suing themselves with this absurd case so they can tell all their customers "the courts demanded we do this".

To be OT and serious now, how many people would get in touch with Apple to get the password to unlock porn? It wouldn't bother me but then again I wouldn't buy a product that demanded I get permission to have a fap in the first place.
 

Dr.Awkward

New member
Mar 27, 2013
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and yet, with the court costs and legal fees, he could have just hired someone to make one for him.
 

Fdzzaigl

New member
Mar 31, 2010
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/bashes head against table

... reads article again...

/bashes head some more

...


Captcha: how the fuck am I supposed to know the name and function of a brand that doesn't even exist in europe by its logo alone? GRRR
 

Alorxico

New member
Jan 5, 2011
193
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And here I thought frivolous lawsuits were dead. Count on the lawyers to dig up this shallow grave and try to blame others for their problems.
 

008Zulu_v1legacy

New member
Sep 6, 2009
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Fdzzaigl said:
Captcha: how the fuck am I supposed to know the name and function of a brand that doesn't even exist in europe by its logo alone? GRRR
Maybe you should sue Apple for allowing ads like that to be present on the internet. Kinda funny how the verification puzzles have now become paid advertising.

So we have a lawyer with a porn addiction. Normally I would be able to think of a snappy joke, but really, it writes itself. Looking at pictures of naked people or movies of said naked people having sex is not a problem. Not ever. His claim that all porn is a result of kidnapping and slavery will no doubt earn him a defamation law suit or two from America's own porn stars.
 

CriticalMiss

New member
Jan 18, 2013
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008Zulu said:
Fdzzaigl said:
Captcha: how the fuck am I supposed to know the name and function of a brand that doesn't even exist in europe by its logo alone? GRRR
Maybe you should sue Apple for allowing ads like that to be present on the internet. Kinda funny how the verification puzzles have now become paid advertising.
Just subvert them by answering the blatant advertising captchas with the word 'poo'. Flood them with useless data and they'll stop doing it, or they will advise Dolce Gabana to start a range of designer le toilette du papiérs (poncy loo roll). Entertaining either way.
 

Jennacide

New member
Dec 6, 2007
1,019
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Yes, let's put mandatory filters on products because one idiot doesn't have any self control. Defacto censorship totally isn't wrong!
 

kongajinken

New member
Mar 24, 2012
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He has a mental disability, is there any mental disabilities that can impair one's frontal lobe or what not to this degree? I know of things like turrets and other mental disabilities that make it so you instantly blurt out what your thinking, this I would like to know of if its true.
 

RJ 17

The Sound of Silence
Nov 27, 2011
8,687
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This man should be shot, then disbarred.

Then shot again.

And set on fire.

Then shot one more time.

Seriously, from now on when you look up the term "Frivolous Lawsuit", it should just have a picture of this guy and a brief summary of his lawsuit. I don't think I've ever seen a better example of blaming others for your own problems.

 

CpT_x_Killsteal

New member
Jun 21, 2012
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How is it even possible to sue for something like this? And his reasoning?!
I couldn't stop my biological crap, so it's your fault.
It's like a rapist suing someone he raped because "he just couldn't help himself".
 

Shamanic Rhythm

New member
Dec 6, 2009
1,653
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So apparently it doesn't make you go blind, it only erodes your sense of logic and promotes dyslexia in areas of the brain responsible for basic typing skills.