Limits of self-deprecation

SckizoBoy

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This has been bothering me for a bit, but would you ever unsubscribe or stop following a content creator if they were incessantly self-deprecatory or self-critical (even if their actual content remains good)?

I ask 'cos there's a small youtuber I follow for a super niche hobby and it may be because the hobby is super niche, so the worldwide community is really small and pretty close-knit. His content is pretty good (though his videos could do with some intro music as a hook), even if he has little competition for the stuff he does, but fuck me, he can't stop ragging on it when he publicises his videos. It's like the tonal opposite of the cheery "like and subscribe" sort.
 

Xprimentyl

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I’m borderline with Boogie2988. I subscribed years ago primarily for his “Francis” videos, but over time, his channel has gone from humorous and entertaining to just pathetic. Between his struggles with weight loss, surgery, divorce and countless social media controversies, most of his content now is about his personal life, apologies for his public goofs followed by apologies for his apologies. He’s constantly going on and on about his dwindling subscriber base and complaining about demonetization of his content. It’s sad, really; his channel is mostly a form of a one-way therapy session for him, and he needs the subscribership to validate him. I haven’t unsubscribed as yet; it’d almost feel like walking out on someone whose every other sentence is a blubbering cry for help. He can keep my subscription if those numbers are what matter, but if it’s the views, mostly can’t help him there.
 

happyninja42

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Yeah I can find it annoying if they are too extreme with it. Mostly out of a sense of "ok this video is 10 minutes long, and you've devoted 3 minutes of it to making self-depricating qualifications about why your stuff is junk." That's almost 1/3 useless content that I'm just sitting through. I got it, you're a small YT guy, I'm not expecting Hollywood level content from your little video on how to paint WH40K miniatures or whatever. Get to the reason I clicked on this video please.
 

JoJo

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Like anything, it can be overdone. A little self-depreciation can show that you don't take yourself too seriously and are willing to laugh at yourself once in a while. Too much and it can come across as lacking in confidence and seeking validation from others.
 

ObsidianJones

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This has been bothering me for a bit, but would you ever unsubscribe or stop following a content creator if they were incessantly self-deprecatory or self-critical (even if their actual content remains good)?

I ask 'cos there's a small youtuber I follow for a super niche hobby and it may be because the hobby is super niche, so the worldwide community is really small and pretty close-knit. His content is pretty good (though his videos could do with some intro music as a hook), even if he has little competition for the stuff he does, but fuck me, he can't stop ragging on it when he publicises his videos. It's like the tonal opposite of the cheery "like and subscribe" sort.
I would stop watching a Youtuber if what they are putting out now is not healthy to my gestalt.

An example was Razorfist. I actually liked his reviews a while back. I didn't mind the "in your face" style. Sure, he was abrasive and not a fan of Movie Bob or Game Trailers. But I didn't consider him outright hateful (not racially) until 2016.

When Donald Trump won.

And it seemed like not only did he drink the Trump Cult/Qanon kool aid, he brewed it in back and invited people to see his special recipe.

During the time where video game and movie content seemed to wane and more political hit pieces came out, I had to distance myself just a few months after Trump was elected because I was already dealing with the disappointment of having Trump as the President.

I can only imagine how much it worst it got this last election.
 
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SckizoBoy

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Yeah I can find it annoying if they are too extreme with it. Mostly out of a sense of "ok this video is 10 minutes long, and you've devoted 3 minutes of it to making self-depricating qualifications about why your stuff is junk." That's almost 1/3 useless content that I'm just sitting through. I got it, you're a small YT guy, I'm not expecting Hollywood level content from your little video on how to paint WH40K miniatures or whatever. Get to the reason I clicked on this video please.
That's the weird thing, there's a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge dissonance between how he is in his videos (pretty thoughtful, matter-of-fact and non-judgemental about anything for the most part unless it's in-game in-world stuff) and the social media posts that accompany the videos (really forced quips amounting to "here's why this video is shit, please don't shoot me"). I honestly don't get the personality shift between text and voice.

I'm sort of afraid to call the guy out because the community is so small and drama hangs around like the smell of rotten fish.
 

happyninja42

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That's the weird thing, there's a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge dissonance between how he is in his videos (pretty thoughtful, matter-of-fact and non-judgemental about anything for the most part unless it's in-game in-world stuff) and the social media posts that accompany the videos (really forced quips amounting to "here's why this video is shit, please don't shoot me"). I honestly don't get the personality shift between text and voice.

I'm sort of afraid to call the guy out because the community is so small and drama hangs around like the smell of rotten fish.
Well, a lot of people have anxiety about promoting their "thing" online, in a positive way. They think it's arrogant, or bragging or whatever. So they try and "not make a big deal of it" in their response. I mean, I understand the psychology of it, I just don't agree with it. I assume it's to try and mitigate comments like "This guy thinks he's some master figurine painter or whatever, but he's just doing this on his kitchen table? Pssh, what a loser!" Or something to that effect. (I honestly don't know why I've chosen WH40K figurine painting as my example, I don't enjoy either of those things)

As to your concern about criticizing his posts, for fear that your criticism will harm his feelings about criticism. I would just say to just be nice about it. "Hey dude, love your content, but I think you're being a bit too hard on yourself with your social media posts calling your work shit. It's not shit, otherwise we wouldn't be watching it. Give yourself more credit when talking about your work, or at the very least don't shit talk it so much."

To me that seems reasonable. I mean you can only do so much, if he's that insecure, where a comment saying "hey don't be so insecure" makes him more insecure...well, that's out of your hands really.
 
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SckizoBoy

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(I honestly don't know why I've chosen WH40K figurine painting as my example, I don't enjoy either of those things)
How bizarre(!) It's related, somewhat tangentially, but still.

But yeah, I was in a snappy mood when the last one got shared (hence OP being a bit... blunt). Take a few to calm it and think on what would be a better way to go about responding, that makes perfect sense.
 

XsjadoBlayde

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With anything (except boldfaced political lies apparently), repetition leads to diminishing returns, leads to numbness and potentially resentment after a while. Better to mix things up if a particular direction or content choice is leading to over exposure, best to avoid contributing to one's own frustrations more. I gave up on promoting my own creative shit as i couldn't handle the growing feeling of dishonesty and anxiety from hating what was created while still being told to aim for one's ambitions publicly. Probably better than adding self-deprication to everything in a "haha jokey, but not really" kind of way.
 

Bedinsis

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People want to hear what they already believe.

If someone is telling something that the audience think implies the speaker is pathetic then hearing that fact vocalized reflects honesty on the speaker.

If the audience does not think it implies the speaker is pathetic then hearing it aloud reflects insecurity on the speaker.

What's more the thing about humor is that it requires variety in order to stay fresh, so if someone keeps using themself as a source of humor it can come across as whiny.

I agree on your general description of that guy. He is however the last person I'd think about when talking about self-depreciating humor.
 

SilentPony

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I’m borderline with Boogie2988. I subscribed years ago primarily for his “Francis” videos, but over time, his channel has gone from humorous and entertaining to just pathetic. Between his struggles with weight loss, surgery, divorce and countless social media controversies, most of his content now is about his personal life, apologies for his public goofs followed by apologies for his apologies. He’s constantly going on and on about his dwindling subscriber base and complaining about demonetization of his content. It’s sad, really; his channel is mostly a form of a one-way therapy session for him, and he needs the subscribership to validate him. I haven’t unsubscribed as yet; it’d almost feel like walking out on someone whose every other sentence is a blubbering cry for help. He can keep my subscription if those numbers are what matter, but if it’s the views, mostly can’t help him there.
Isn't Boogie2988 a sociopath? Like didn't his wife and ex-friends all claim he's an abusive, amoral liar behind the camera, always gaslighting everyone and then claiming mental disorders when he gets caught? I remember some camgirl he wanted to date said he was a pathological liar and would say anything if it got him out of trouble.
 
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Xprimentyl

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Isn't Boogie2988 a sociopath? Like didn't his wife and ex-friends all claim he's an abusive, amoral liar behind the camera, always gaslighting everyone and then claiming mental disorders when he gets caught? I remember some camgirl he wanted to date said he was a pathological liar and would say anything if it got him out of trouble.
According to Boogie, he never abused his wife (outside of making her a part of the Francis skits and the inevitable clean-up afterwards; ) he also said she'd backed him up demonstrably on social media (can't recall which one.)

But yeah, the cam girl thing I do recall hearing about. Didn't dig too much into it; honestly, once I heard "cam girl," I assumed "gold-digger," and couldn't be arsed to question credibility on the part of either party, i.e.: both she and Boogie knew what that "relationship" was. Thankfully for her, Boogie is morbidly obese and can barely walk; literally just walking away was always an option for her.

Either way, I don't bother with his channel much anymore save for the occasional "Francis" video which anymore seem about as phoned-in and pathetic in their desperation to recapture past success as the rest of his more recent content; I'm probably going to stop watching those too. (Though the one where he tried get over on an Xbox Series X scalper was pretty damned funny.)
 

Piscian

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I think self-deprecation is kind of a wide umbrella requiring a lot of context. I'm known to be self-deprecating in the extreme, but only in the context of making people laugh and often sarcastically for sake of bringing myself up, not down. "When life gives you lemons" and all that. I have a lot of personal reasons for being that way, but also I think it makes you a more approachable human and stronger person to be able to laugh at lifes hardships. Brian Regan and Kyle Kinane are some of my favorite comedians who solely stick to uplifting and fun, often self-deprecating humor. I think that perspective can really save you from agonizing over your own misery and help you push through it. I think the ability to use self-deprecation to cheer yourself up can be a powerful tool.

I got into a fistfight with one of my cousins at a party once because I had a bunch of people laughing at some joke I made over some crazy life stuff I was going through. I think I got hit by my own car or something. Anyway, my cousin made some snide comment trying to be funny at my expense. The record skipped when I asked him in front his friends to make a joke about himself. He couldn't and I called him a coward and announced to everyone that he was too insecure to laugh at himself. I felt bad about it after, but I really hate people who can only laugh at other peoples misery. You can guess how I voted.

However, maybe OP is referring to people who only really complain about their problems and failings without any kind of punchline. Naw, I wouldn't watch anyone do that. Not for all the money in the world. I'm too empathetic and I ain't got time to wallow in other peoples misery. Youtube or human, if misery wants company you should take a rain check.
 

Catfood220

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I would stop watching a Youtuber if what they are putting out now is not healthy to my gestalt.

An example was Razorfist. I actually liked his reviews a while back. I didn't mind the "in your face" style. Sure, he was abrasive and not a fan of Movie Bob or Game Trailers. But I didn't consider him outright hateful (not racially) until 2016.

When Donald Trump won.

And it seemed like not only did he drink the Trump Cult/Qanon kool aid, he brewed it in back and invited people to see his special recipe.

During the time where video game and movie content seemed to wane and more political hit pieces came out, I had to distance myself just a few months after Trump was elected because I was already dealing with the disappointment of having Trump as the President.

I can only imagine how much it worst it got this last election.
Yeah, pretty much the same here. I subscribed to him for his game reviews, he was kind of like a nastier Yahtzee which I liked. Then Trump happened and he became unwatchable so I had to unsubscribe. Out of morbid curiosity, I took a look at some of his more recent videos earlier this year. He has gone full blown conspiracy theory nutcase, convinced that the election was rigged and all that.
 

SilentPony

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Yeah, pretty much the same here. I subscribed to him for his game reviews, he was kind of like a nastier Yahtzee which I liked. Then Trump happened and he became unwatchable so I had to unsubscribe. Out of morbid curiosity, I took a look at some of his more recent videos earlier this year. He has gone full blown conspiracy theory nutcase, convinced that the election was rigged and all that.
I remember when he truly lost me he told a story that had to be bullshit about how Mexican drug gangs ran his mother out of her home, like stormed it armed and everything, in Arizona and not only did the police not do anything, that same gang then turned the neighborhood into a warzone with gang shootings every day. And its like dude, really, a white woman is driven from her house a gun point by illegal Mexicans in a racist state like Arizona and its not national news and SWAT didn't step in? And that was his reasoning for supporting Trump, he wanted to get his mom's house back.

He just went full Qanon crazy, which sadly makes me think he always was batshit crazy and the Trump years simply gave him permission to start spouting his racist fanfics.
 

Drathnoxis

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No, most of the time it's because they get Patreon and stop making videos, or they just stop making videos, or they are Jim and I can't stand listening to them prattle on about the same couple outrage topics again and again in a 30 minute video that, by all rights, should have been edited down to 5-10 at most.

I’m borderline with Boogie2988. I subscribed years ago primarily for his “Francis” videos, but over time, his channel has gone from humorous and entertaining to just pathetic. Between his struggles with weight loss, surgery, divorce and countless social media controversies, most of his content now is about his personal life, apologies for his public goofs followed by apologies for his apologies. He’s constantly going on and on about his dwindling subscriber base and complaining about demonetization of his content. It’s sad, really; his channel is mostly a form of a one-way therapy session for him, and he needs the subscribership to validate him. I haven’t unsubscribed as yet; it’d almost feel like walking out on someone whose every other sentence is a blubbering cry for help. He can keep my subscription if those numbers are what matter, but if it’s the views, mostly can’t help him there.
It always really bothers me when someone brings up personal life in a video about something unrelated to them. It horribly dates the video when you are watching them talk about something happening to them "now" 3 years ago, and it's just super unprofessional in my opinion. If the video is late, it's late, it doesn't matter. It's not made better because you explain why in the video, it's actually worse. Put the explanation in the description if you absolutely must.

I got into a fistfight with one of my cousins at a party once because I had a bunch of people laughing at some joke I made over some crazy life stuff I was going through. I think I got hit by my own car or something. Anyway, my cousin made some snide comment trying to be funny at my expense. The record skipped when I asked him in front his friends to make a joke about himself. He couldn't and I called him a coward and announced to everyone that he was too insecure to laugh at himself. I felt bad about it after, but I really hate people who can only laugh at other peoples misery. You can guess how I voted.
Wow, you sound like the life of the party. I hope this was when you were a child or something. Maybe it's just difficult to come up with humour on the spot and self deferential humour in particular is very dependent on flow and timing to be effective. You can't just tell someone to be funny and then get angry when they can't deliver.
 
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Agema

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Like anything, it can be overdone. A little self-depreciation can show that you don't take yourself too seriously and are willing to laugh at yourself once in a while. Too much and it can come across as lacking in confidence and seeking validation from others.
We all want a bit of validation from time to time, but wanting too much validation is to make one's happiness hostage to others.
 

Secondhand Revenant

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Not a follower of people on YouTube but it does wear thin in personal interactions. Might find it more ignoreable in a person on youtube ig because surely it only shows up so much vs the rest of their content I'd hope? Anyways it is a rather annoying trait to encounter often. There's ways to avoid bragging etc without going the exact opposite direction. I mean keep it as simple as "If you enjoyed this consider subscribing" or something
 

Secondhand Revenant

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We all want a bit of validation from time to time, but wanting too much validation is to make one's happiness hostage to others.
Eh it can wear on others when they're expected to give it by a self-depreciating prompt. Becomes more of a demand in a sense. Tho that's more for personal interactions than like videos
 

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Why don't you name or post this youtuber so we can see what you're talking about?