Mall Fight - Back To Basics (Open)

[Knife-28]

Fun fact, 'Mall Security' that just pounced Redlin were actually golums made from water noodles.
Now that that little tidbit of infomation is out of the way, I respawn and light the Water Noodle Golums on fire.
It dosn't do much.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

*Respawns*

I need something to fight with...

*jumps into the Mall's RONA store and grabs an Adjustable Ground Spike*

*swings with all his might and knocks off the head of a Golumn*

 

[Knife-28]

I respawn.
"FOR NARNIA!"
I then charge in and start hitting golums with my cricket bat.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

*finishes off last Golumn*

Why, hello there.

 

[Knife-28]

"Ah, a newcomer, welcome!" I say, before smashing my cricket bat over Redlin's head.

 

[DJ_DEnM]

I tackle EricDraven while yelling "LEEEROOOOOOY JENKINNNSSSSS". While he's on the ground I snap his neck off and plant a white flag where it was.

(Captcha: umbrella corporation. THEY DO EXIST )

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

*Respawns and runs into hardware store again, hiding*

 

[Knife-28]

I follow Redlin into the hardware store. "Oh Reddie, come out and play-ay..." I call out.

 

[DJ_DEnM]

I tackle Knife in hopes of reviving this topic and snap his neck.

 

[Knife-28]

Fortulently for me, what DJ DEnM thought was my neck was actually the ice covering it, and his snapping of it also causes the rest of the ice encasing me to shatter. I hit DJ over the head with the but of my cricket bat and run deeper into the store.

 

[FDLinc]

Spawn in the Hardware store, have the unfortunates to spawn in front of Knife, get stabbed by him as he runs past, respawn in the water feature in the middle of the mall.

"What the f**k was that?!"

 

[Knife-28]

I wonder how I managed to stab the newcomer with a cricket bat. While wondering this, I crash into a rack of wireless drills. I respawn, and grab the boxing glove arrow as it flys towards FDLinc.

 

[FDLinc]

having seen this, I grab Knife's hand, I put both our fists in the glove and pull him along enough to punch out Eric.
Sadly Knife is no-homo, so he promptly yanks his hand out and drowns me.
Respawn into a Hot Topic and start to wonder where I went wrong.

 

[Knife-28]

Again, I wonder why I would drown this newcomer, and not simply it him in the balls with my cricket bat. Not able to discount the posibility of alien brain slugs at play, I check myself into The Mall Hospital.

 

[FDLinc]

Leave the Hot Topic and head towards the guys' bathroom to look for new spawners and instead get horrified at how inaccurate the people in this mall can get.

 

[DJ_DEnM]

I jump out of a stall on FDLinc and bludgeon him with a cricket bat.

 

[Knife-28]

After being chased around the hospitle in a series of wacky scenes set to the tune of yanky sax, I turn around and punch Eric in the face.
"How about no!" I say, refering to his current dress, "You crazy bastard of unknown ethnicity."
Seeing he's out could, I then go to the bathroom.

 

[Knife-28]

I jump out of one of the hospitals windows in slow motion, the explosion blooming behind me.
Then gravity kicks in and I fall three stories to my death.

 

[FDLinc]

Respawn in the hospital post-explosion, start thinking my luck might not be all that bad, exit hospital and hear some maniacal laughter, I go to investigate and get crushed by the falling Knife (it's a tall hospital). I respawn next to Eric and after a brief stuggle, I throw him down a flight of stairs

 

[Knife-28]

I wait at the bottom of the stairs for Eric, perpared to hit him in the face with some balled up socks I swiped from the clothing store.