Moar Food!: Faux Pas that drive you crazy.

[Dethenger]

Mayonnaise on burgers. It gets snuck onto a sandwich without telling the customer, and they just assume you should know it comes with mayo.

Have you ever had fry sauce? It's a Utah thing, it's really just ketchup and mayo, but it tastes fucking phenomenal on burgers. I hate mayo and I love this shit.

OT: Drenching anything in sauce. For the longest time, I thought I hated Mexican food. I despised going to my abuela's house for dinner or anything because I hated having Mexican food. Then my friends dragged me to a Mexican restaurant, and I ordered a tamale, and to my surprise, it wasn't drowning in Tapatio. It was actually delicious. The same goes for a lot of Asian foods. For fuck's sake, why make a delicious meal and then ruin it by submerging it in sauce? It's like buying a cake that's 90% frosting. The frosting may be good, but who the hell wants that? There are of course a few exceptions. If you're ordering sweet and sour/lemon/whatever chicken, of course you're going to want the sauce on heavy. But if I want a burrito, I want a burrito, not a soggy, messy Tapatio receptacle.

 

[DugMachine]

Mayonnaise with pizza.

That's...that's wrong. It's not even a matter of opinion, that's just objectively wrong. If you put mayonnaise on your pizza then your pizza should be immediately confiscated and given to the nearest starving tramp: at least they won't mistreat their food.

This is the first time I've heard of it. I mean I know of drowning in ranch dressing but who the fuck puts mayonnaise on their pizza?! Disgusting

Oh and yeah Pineapple on pizza.. just fucking no. But that's because I hate pineapple with a passion.

 

[DugMachine]

Using bacon as an ingredient. WHat I mean is when people chop bacon up and put it in sauce or something like that. It should be eaten in intact slices. Don't waste it.

My uncle cooks bacon to the point of almost burnt just to collect the grease and put it in different foods. I'll usually have some of the unburnt bacon but most goes to waste

 

[shadyh8er]

Fucking "Dessert Pizzas." These are pizzas where they put ingredients for cake (frosting, Oreo cookie crumbs, etc) on a pizza crust. It's just as disgusting as it sounds.

 

[Canadian Rob]

You know what? No! Fuck you food elitists, as long as I don't have to eat it I'm fine with whatever you do. Leave me and my food alone!

I would hardly call us elitists. I'm not going to stop you from eating anything, but a part of me curls up and dies when people do horrible things to their foods. The person who orders the extra well done steak and wants it like a hard piece of leather. The person who drenches their food in a sauce so it can't be recognized as what it was. Kids (and adults) that refuse to eat something unless it is served in some frivolous way. The person who pours on the salt and the pepper before even trying their food.
It is a sign that they don't care about what they are eating. I work in food service, I see maybe a bit more food stupidity than most each day. When you put a lot of work into something, and the recipient treats it like they don't care about it, it is insulting and infuriating. Yes, it is absolutely their right to do with it as they wish. If you are an artist, it is the right of someone purchasing your art to tear it up and piss on it. If you make computers, it is the right of your customer to smash the custom box he just bought with a hammer.

I have a friend who has the horrible habit inviting people over for activities, with the statement "Hey, I got pizza". When we get there, the pizza box is opened, and it is covered with pineapple.

 

[artanis_neravar]

A local pizza franchise here in Finland sell Pepperoni Pizza. Just a shame that it comes with Pepperoni and fucking TUNA!!

Another local habit is blue cheese. Keep that shit out of my pizza.

Don't care I'mma say it.

Hawaiian pizza.

It's just...

You don't put fruit on pizza.

'Well, technically, tomato is a fru-' You shut the hell up! It's not the same thing! You shut your goddamn heathen mouth before the food gods close it for you.

This too. Fucking fruit.

Mostly pizza related. I have others but I don't want to ruin my day any further.

Tuna? on pizza? that is disgusting. But more importantly I love Buffalo Chicken, but dispise both ranch and blue cheese, so it is impossible to ever get it on pizza.

Not Pizza related ones, putting Ketchup on pasta, or on baked potatoes.

Oh and chreamcheese frosting, it is unnatural and an obomination.

 

[MetalDooley]

Mayonnaise with pizza.

That's...that's wrong. It's not even a matter of opinion, that's just objectively wrong. If you put mayonnaise on your pizza then your pizza should be immediately confiscated and given to the nearest starving tramp: at least they won't mistreat their food.

My brother does this.It's fucking horrible

 

[Quijiboh]

Ketchup. Ketchup is for chips (fries) and nothing else.

Also, when I come to power anyone who mixes tuna with cheese must immediately be assigned to conversion therapy.

However, the worst offender is whatever the hell it is that every seller of packaged salad of any variety puts in it to make it all taste the same. Which is to say, like ass. I don't even know what it is - dressing? A preservative? Do people hate vegetables so much that they'll endure this to prevent even the possibility of tasting them?

 

[JdaS]

A local pizza franchise here in Finland sell Pepperoni Pizza. Just a shame that it comes with Pepperoni and fucking TUNA!!

Another local habit is blue cheese. Keep that shit out of my pizza.

Don't care I'mma say it.

Hawaiian pizza.

It's just...

You don't put fruit on pizza.

'Well, technically, tomato is a fru-' You shut the hell up! It's not the same thing! You shut your goddamn heathen mouth before the food gods close it for you.

This too. Fucking fruit.

Mostly pizza related. I have others but I don't want to ruin my day any further.

Tuna? on pizza? that is disgusting. But more importantly I love Buffalo Chicken, but dispise both ranch and blue cheese, so it is impossible to ever get it on pizza.

Not Pizza related ones, putting Ketchup on pasta, or on baked potatoes.

Oh and chreamcheese frosting, it is unnatural and an obomination.

Gonna have to disagree with you on one of those, chief. Ketchup and Pasta is the shit! Not ketchup by itself, mind, I'm not an animal. But get some Heinz Mexican Ketchup and some butter in there and I'll lick the plate clean.

 

[AngloDoom]

Mayonnaise with pizza.

That's...that's wrong. It's not even a matter of opinion, that's just objectively wrong. If you put mayonnaise on your pizza then your pizza should be immediately confiscated and given to the nearest starving tramp: at least they won't mistreat their food.

My brother does this.It's fucking horrible

I feel sorry for you - it must be hard growing up with a soulless brother.

 

[artanis_neravar]

A local pizza franchise here in Finland sell Pepperoni Pizza. Just a shame that it comes with Pepperoni and fucking TUNA!!

Another local habit is blue cheese. Keep that shit out of my pizza.

Don't care I'mma say it.

Hawaiian pizza.

It's just...

You don't put fruit on pizza.

'Well, technically, tomato is a fru-' You shut the hell up! It's not the same thing! You shut your goddamn heathen mouth before the food gods close it for you.

This too. Fucking fruit.

Mostly pizza related. I have others but I don't want to ruin my day any further.

Tuna? on pizza? that is disgusting. But more importantly I love Buffalo Chicken, but dispise both ranch and blue cheese, so it is impossible to ever get it on pizza.

Not Pizza related ones, putting Ketchup on pasta, or on baked potatoes.

Oh and chreamcheese frosting, it is unnatural and an obomination.

Gonna have to disagree with you on one of those, chief. Ketchup and Pasta is the shit! Not ketchup by itself, mind, I'm not an animal. But get some Heinz Mexican Ketchup and some butter in there and I'll lick the plate clean.

To be fair I am biased, even the smell of Katchup makes me nauseated

 

[MetalDooley]

I feel sorry for you - it must be hard growing up with a soulless brother.

It's not something he's always done.It's only since he moved back from Australia.

Damn you Australia

 

[Fenra]

Gravy on chips... I just, even the thought of it makes me gag

 

[Lionsfan]

People who put ketchup on hot dogs, I'm sorry you're doing food wrong. It's just an unnatural combination

 

[purf]

A friend of mine will make himself a cup of coffee...
... and then drink it more or less throughout the rest of the day.

The sight of the cup alone makes me gag.

 

[Daveman]

Well it was mostly a combination of two eating rules for me which were to hold the spoon at the end and to sit up straight when eating. A flimsy grip and massive distance is an invitation for a spillage and it makes no sense.

Also not slurping etc always seemed really arbitrary to me when younger and sure enough when I grow up I find out that in Asia the reverse is the polite option.

Actually food wise though I have to say that anyone who adds milk to earl grey is just doing it wrong. It needs a slice of lemon if anything or you need to find a different tea!

My final word is that hawaiian pizza is absolutely fine.

 

[Roofstone]

People who put ketchup on hot dogs, I'm sorry you're doing food wrong. It's just an unnatural combination

Hehe, that is actually pretty much standard in Norway. Whenever there is a advertisement for ketchup it is on hot dogs.

OT: Crunchy stuff on pizza. Not so bad that I get angry at people for having it. But that shit is nasty.

 

[IndomitableSam]

Garlic.

... People don't put enough of it in food. It's good in just about everything.

Use it more, people. MORE.

Gravy on chips... I just, even the thought of it makes me gag

I... what? You need poutine. Come to Canada, go to Montreal, and order poutine, and that'll change your mind.

 

[Erttheking]

My sister dips her French fries in mayo. As someone who loves mayo, I find it disgusting.

 

[Shoggoth2588]

As common as it is, I can't stand to watch people ruin a perfectly good hot dog with ketchup.

Green Peppers ruin pasta dishes and they especially ruin pizzas. I've been telling my family this for years but they just don't fucking listen.

Picky Children. You won't eat your food if it is touching. You won't eat anything but macaroni and cheese. You won't eat a sandwich unless it is cut into quarters diagonally. GODS I HATE CHILDREN! I hate parents that put up with that shit too.

Over cooked steak. I don't mean when a steak gets over cooked by accident, when someone requests an extra well done steak. They want all the goodness cooked out of the meat. I realize that everyone doesn't like steak the way I do (Rare to medium rare), but don't go ruining a perfectly good cut of meat like that!

These two as well. I hate children for number one (although I am in favor of letting them go hungry so maybe they learn something). As for number 2, this is my mom. I think she has a phobia but still, refusing to eat steak with any level of pinkness just seems insane to me.

I don't like Hawaiian Pizza but ya know what I do like? Bacon and Black Olives on a thin-crust pizza.