Motivation,Exams and Life

greenice

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Apr 7, 2010
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So as you can see from the title what I want to talk about is motivation more specifically how it affects peoples lives and were to get it.

I'm a 19 year old guy in his last year of high school and since I've been young I've never really been passionate about anything, by that I mean that yeah I might like some games or movies or books but I've never really felt anything more than a mild like. But of course that wouldn't be such a problem if it didn't extend to the rest of my life too,you know,school,people and basically everything else, I just never have any motivation to do anything.Sure I start plenty of things but I always stop after a couple of days or weeks.And now the problem is that tomorrow I have to take the first of my final exams and I have learned close to nothing. I always managed to have really good grades at school without much effort and I'm in a really crappy situation I don't know what to do and I'm starting to panic, since basically my whole life will be decided by this test. I just see all these people so perseverant and passionate about things and happy and I have no idea how they manage to do that, most of the time I'm just really sad.I feel like I'm failing at life, I don't know what I'm gonna do with myself, not to mention all the people that I'm gonna disappoint(because of the aforementioned good grades in school).

In the end I don't really know what I expected to achieve by writing this, but any advice would be nice.Did you guys ever have this sort of problem?How did you overcome it?
 

cori

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Jun 29, 2013
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My advice to you is to breathe and calm down. If there's time to study for your exams, DO THAT RIGHT NOW. You should worry more about this rather than thinking about the distant future for the moment being. However if you feel like cramming knowledge at this time will not help you with your finals and need emotional support instead, feel free to PM me and I'll try help as best I can!
The important thing here is to not judge yourself too harshly by comparing yourself to others. Are you sure you're not romanticising the idea of having a passion? Maybe you are placing too much value on the word and have developed an unrealistic expectation that everybody should have an interest that drives their life. That is NOT the case. While there are some people out there who are incredibly happy having one talent that truly is a part of them there are similarly just as many other people who have no obvious liking for something and have mixed interests. I personally like photography, reading, writing, films and art. I am extremely changeable but that's okay because I've realised that my lack of one singular passion doesn't restrict me at all.
Maybe what you're motivated to do is so conventional that you don't consider it something worthy of being a passion? I used to think that reading and writing could not be considered "passions" because they're just a part of English not as cool as being a musical genius that can compose music, have perfect pitch and conduct the school orchestra. That's a bad mentality. Figure out subjects you enjoy and perhaps go from there.
P.S Don't place so much value on one singular event so early on in your life. You could take a gap year after high school to find out who you are and who you want to be. Try keep a positive outlook at least until you pass these exams THEN start worrying about your broader future, good luck!
 

Frezzato

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Oct 17, 2012
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Take one thing at a time, Greenice. Do what Cori says--study anything you feel you are lacking in, but remember this:

You need rest.

Everything I've read about sleep indicates that a good rest is essential to retaining and processing information. And I suspect you will be nervous about the exams so you should do something that will exhaust you. If you enjoy any sports I suggest that you make time for that today. Don't stay up too late--get a proper rest!
 

archaicmalevolence

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Jul 16, 2010
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Also I wouldn't go as far to say as the final exams in your last year of high school will decide the rest of your life, so you shouldn't overly worry about it as there are many other options out there. Coupled with the fact you yourself aren't entirely sure what you want to do, which is pretty normal for most high school kids.
I just finished high school myself last year, and barely feel like my life has massively changed yet by going to university.

In relation to talents or hobbies, if you find you're not interested by what you try, you could always just look for something else you might enjoy. There's so many different things to do in the world, you more than likely will find an enjoyable task if you are dedicated to look for one.
 

ShiningAmber

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Mar 18, 2013
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I would relax. If exams have never been a issue to you in the past, then I wouldn't start worrying now.

Needless to say, that should change with college if you do plan on attending it. I didn't think I would study either. I breezed through high school with flying colors. I graduated in the top 5% of my class with hardly any effort. I know how you're feeling. College came and I actually had to study and apply myself for the first time in my life. The first semester really threw me a curve ball, but I got my feet with a lot of hard work.

It's up to you to apply yourself. No amount of motivation or talking to others will put that into you. You've got to find it in yourself. If it doesn't mean anything to you, what would be the point of it then? If you care, you'll try. And I mean try many things in life.

Work out. Strive to be more fit. Go learn a new language. I've learned three and I'm speaking one right now to you. Find something you want to do. I can't tell you what you like. You've got to find it yourself. You've got your whole life, but why not start now?
 

DrunkenMonkey

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Sep 17, 2012
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Well I overcame it because well, homeless people. I realized that I had the dream life. Somebody paying for my food, clothes, shelter. The least I could do well, is you know apply myself in school.

I will warn you though just like the poster above me. College is a lot different from high school. It's not the workload as people make it out to be. It's the critical thinking that goes with being a college student. If you can't have an open mind then you will never make connections between subjects, then you will never find any interests in said subjects because it will simply be words on pages, and pages in books.

Nobody will instill motivation in you. You have to decide if studying is important enough to you to dedicate time into it.
 

Not Matt

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Nov 3, 2011
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cool title. one will ruin the other. it's an endless circle of horror

honestly, i am in a state of "just f***ing survive this crap". i force myself to do schoolwork while mentally screaming at myself for being dumb enough to continue my education when i had the option to stop and walk out in to the real world. That thing i called motivation is now laying dead on my bathroom floor, making the place stink. my advice: nobody likes school. it sucks no matter how you turn it. just try to get trough it. force yourself to work and don't stop.

(i didn't say it was good advice)
 

Mr.Cynic88

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Oct 1, 2012
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Sometimes I find it helps to think about the worst case scenario honestly, instead of manically like you're doing.

Worst case scenario: you get one round of bad grades on an otherwise quality record and continue about your life with the same skillset that got you this far. Also, you'll have learned what not to do, and you seem to be smart, so you can apply that to better tackle life's next challenge, because trust me, life's not over at 19. Not even close.

Otherwise, take a breath, and do what you can in the moment, and maybe it will turn out even better than that.