New Study Finds That Hot Dogs ARE PEOPLE! THEY'RE PEOPLE!!

[JaredJones]

New Study Finds That Hot Dogs ARE PEOPLE! THEY'RE PEOPLE!!

[vimeo="143207997"]

Like hot dogs? Well, that's probably because you're a cannibal.

With the exception of apple pie or maybe the KFC Double Down, it's hard to think of a food more "American" than hot dogs. Whether being served by the thousands at baseball stadiums or being grilled up at our 4th of July parties, hot dogs are the quintessential cuisine of this country, which really sheds some light on our current obesity epidemic (see also: the success of the KFC Double Down).

But perhaps more confounding than the hot dog's popularity here in America is its popularity in spite of the fact that we know next to nothing about what they're actually made from -- you know, aside from animal butts, which we seemingly have no problem with. Unfortunately for us, it turns out that a surprising amount of the mystery in America's favorite mystery meat, like soylent green before it, is people.


That's according to a recent study by Clear Food [http://www.clearfood.com/food_reports/2015/the_hotdog_report] -- a company which "uses genomic technology to analyze the world's foods at a molecular level, ingredient by ingredient" -- at least. After rounding up 345 samples from 75 brands and 10 retailers, Clear Food found human DNA in 2% of the samples. Perhaps even more horrifying was the study's findings that human DNA was also present in 2/3rds of the vegetarian samples.

You heard it here first: We are all cannibals, but especially vegetarians.

Not only that, but Clear Food also found that nearly 15% of the hot dogs they tested faced "substitution" issues in some way, meaning that "chicken, beef, turkey, and lamb were found in products that were not supposed to contain those ingredients. Pork (was found) in 3% of the samples we tested. In most cases, pork found its way into chicken and turkey sausages."

While these substitution issues should raise a red flag in their own right, they are undoubtedly less shocking when compared to the fact that we have all been eating people this entire time. Does that make Joey Chestnut this generation's Jeffrey Dahmer? Yes, yes it does.

Head over to Clear Food [http://www.clearfood.com/food_reports/2015/the_hotdog_report] for more fun (read: abhorrent) facts about the hot dog, including several handy little infographs that will make you want to skip lunch entirely.

Source: Nature World Report [http://www.natureworldreport.com/2015/10/love-hotdogs-well-it-may-contain-human-dna/]

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[Mr.Mattress]

I thought Humans and pigs had very similar DNA structure, which is why they're one of the Animals Geneticists love playing with? This "2% of Human DNA in Hotdogs" might be a simple misunderstanding by the test or something.

How it's in the Vegan Hotdogs, though, I don't know. Either way, it's a good thing I don't like Hot Dogs.

 

[Vendor-Lazarus]

We all knew that hot dogs contain "meat(and bi-meat)-products", so it's not that shocking..

What I would want clarified is whether they contain 2% PURE Human DNA or 2% OF Human DNA?
There is a world of difference in just one word.

We really should hold food companies to a higher standard anyway.

 

[Aeshi]

For the first time in my life, I find myself wishing this had just been clickbait.

 

[Michael Tabbut]

I don't care if it's has human in it, i'm still gonna eat the stuff.

 

[JoJo]

I thought Humans and pigs had very similar DNA structure, which is why they're one of the Animals Geneticists love playing with? This "2% of Human DNA in Hotdogs" might be a simple misunderstanding by the test or something.

How it's in the Vegan Hotdogs, though, I don't know. Either way, it's a good thing I don't like Hot Dogs.

We all knew that hot dogs contain "meat(and bi-meat)-products", so it's not that shocking..

What I would want clarified is whether they contain 2% PURE Human DNA or 2% OF Human DNA?
There is a world of difference in just one word.

We really should hold food companies to a higher standard anyway.

Unless I'm missing something, having looked at the original report linked in the article, it actually says:

Hygienic issues: Clear Food found human DNA in 2% of the samples, and in 2/3rds of the vegetarian samples.

So it's 2% of the samples that contain any human DNA, not that the samples are 2% human DNA in composition. Which makes more sense, and is not entirely unreasonable, given our species tendency to shed skin cells everywhere we go.

 

[TheRundownRabbit]

I am more shocked and disgusted that the friggin Dramatic Look Gopher was used in the article. Not only that, but passed up a brilliant opportunity for a Soylent Green joke, for shame!

 

[D3s_ToD3s]

[...]Not only that, but passed up a brilliant opportunity for a Soylent Green joke, for shame!

Have you seen the title?

 

[Dach]

For the first time in my life, I find myself wishing this had just been clickbait.

Well, it is. Sort of. It is actually

Clear Food found human DNA in 2% of the samples

Source: http://www.clearfood.com/food_reports/2015/the_hotdog_report

Food contamination is likely the culprit and it isn't clear what concentration was found. Clear Food is likely to phrase their finding in such a way to get people more interested in finding which brands have a good 'clear score.' They currently have a kickstarter running right now so that is a clear motivation for them.

They do appear to have science behind it as their page does include a short blurb about the process. However, I would like more information about their methodology as the vegetarian contamination is both high and problematic assuming the amounts found were of any significance.

 

[Lightknight]

Well... Out of 345 samples 2% had human DNA in them... so there are seven brands they found human in.

Things I want to know:

1. The name of all seven brands.
2. How much human DNA in each.
3. Is it possible to detect whether or not the Humans found in vegetarian hot dogs had themselves previously been vegetarians? Because it might not be false advertisement if so...

 

[flying_whimsy]

I seriously don't believe this. It just sounds like publicity for whatever company that clear food is, or for whatever company magically passed all of these tests.

Also, as someone else stated, pig and human are very similar.

I'm more concerned by the substitution issues.

 

[IamLEAM1983]

I hate saying this, but the clickbait is strong with this article. I'd assume small factory issues make finding human DNA in most, if not all of the food we eat, a practically unavoidable issue. Take someone's half-finished dinner plate and you've got human DNA mixed in with the meal's constituting elements. Take someone else's wine glass and there ya go - human DNA.

Saying we eat human DNA or particulates of skin and hair is like saying the sky is blue. I'm pretty sure I've eaten my own microscopic skin flakes before, and you don't see me crying about cannibalism.

If anything, I was hoping we'd hear something about the OMS finding that most meat sources are likely to be carcinogenic, but there ya go. Mind you, I'd amend the WHO's findings by saying that everything is carcinogenic when excessively absorbed.

 

[Vigormortis]

Misleading titles all around.

The report isn't implying that hot dogs contain 2% human meat. It's stating that, of the 345 samples, 2% contained traces of human DNA. This is likely from the usual contamination that occurs from food processing and packaging. (things like dead skin cells, hair, etc)

I'd wager you'll find more human DNA in your food when you go out to a restaurant to eat.

Also from the report:
"We first test food products for DNA using Clear Labs' proprietary next-generation genomic sequencing workflow. We assign a significant weight to DNA-based data, factoring in DNA degradation and signal parameters (some ingredients might not have DNA or their DNA might have degraded). We screen for major, medium, minor & trace substitution, and we deduct points on the substitution axis. We attempt to capture all ingredients within a sample, but certain foods might not be homogenous (in this case results might not capture the entirety of the product)."

Bolded part by me. I'm curious what their proprietary process entails and how well it accounts for (and can factor out) human error, sample contamination, and other anomalies.

 

[Queen Michael]

So that's how the pork-free hot dogs got that flavour...

 

[koroem]

Click bait. Sigh, don't turn into vg247. There aren't many sites left out there that can actually report news without derpy headlines like this.

 

[Lightknight]

Misleading titles all around.

The report isn't implying that hot dogs contain 2% human meat. It's stating that, of the 345 samples, 2% contained traces of human DNA. This is likely from the usual contamination that occurs from food processing and packaging. (things like dead skin cells, hair, etc)

I'd wager you'll find more human DNA in your food when you go out to a restaurant to eat.

Also from the report:
"We first test food products for DNA using Clear Labs' proprietary next-generation genomic sequencing workflow. We assign a significant weight to DNA-based data, factoring in DNA degradation and signal parameters (some ingredients might not have DNA or their DNA might have degraded). We screen for major, medium, minor & trace substitution, and we deduct points on the substitution axis. We attempt to capture all ingredients within a sample, but certain foods might not be homogenous (in this case results might not capture the entirety of the product)."

Bolded part by me. I'm curious what their proprietary process entails and how well it accounts for (and can factor out) human error, sample contamination, and other anomalies.

I'd say it is news that 2/3rds of vegetarian brands had human in them. If they weren't vegetarian then there's a mislabeling issue that need to be addressed.

I'd also like to know all 7 brands out of the 345 that had it.

 

[Lightknight]

Click bait. Sigh, don't turn into vg247. There aren't many sites left out there that can actually report news without derpy headlines like this.

Human meat being in our food is legit news. There are even plays and books written about the concept. This study found 7 brands of hotdogs have human in them and 66% of vegidogs tested also had human in them.

That's pretty big considered how common hotdogs are.

 

[Karadalis]

Click bait. Sigh, don't turn into vg247. There aren't many sites left out there that can actually report news without derpy headlines like this.

Human meat being in our food is legit news. There are even plays and books written about the concept. This study found 7 brands of hotdogs have human in them and 66% of vegidogs tested also had human in them.

That's pretty big considered how common hotdogs are.

You must be intentionally ignoring everything else that was said. Cant explain how else you could get it so bloody wrong.

No there was no human meat in any of these products. Unless you count stuff like hairs and skin cells as human meat

Chances are some factory grunt didnt really took the hygiene rules that seriously. Wich still is a nono... but it doesnt mean there was human meat in any of these products.

 

[Zipzip the Penguin]

Do you want to become The Onion? Because this is how you become The Onion.

 

[Dach]

Human meat being in our food is legit news. [...] This study found 7 brands of hotdogs have human in them and 66% of vegidogs tested also had human in them.

They had "human DNA". Hair, dander, etc could easily be the culprit, as could sample contamination. Even if this is the case, that isn't good since human diseases can be more easily transmitted this way. But that depend quite heavily on how much is present. This doesn't even get into the chance of false positives.