Poll: Everyday person's throne

Aug 19, 2010
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The Toilet!

I'm not here it discuss the societal impact of this invention. I'm not here to praise the advancements in hygiene we have achieved due to this glorious creation.
No, my dear escapists, I'm here to ask one, very simple question. A question with no weight, or importance, a question which's substance is nigh nonexistent.

I'm here to ask, that when sitting on thy humble throne, do you lean back, setting your back against the wall/tank, or lean forward, stalwartly planting your elbows upon thy thighs?
 

TheRightToArmBears

New member
Dec 13, 2008
8,674
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You're doing it wrong! You're supposed to sit facing the cistern, so you have a place to put your papers and inkpot.
 

manic_depressive13

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Dec 28, 2008
2,617
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I just... sit. I don't lean back against anything- that's gross. But I'm not bent over double so as to have my elbows on my knees either. Taking a shit only takes about a minute if you're not ill so I don't see why you would need to adopt a posture for it.
 

Fappy

\[T]/
May 1, 2020
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If I am going to be there for awhile I lean forward usually. If I sit like that for too long the circulation in my legs gets cut off and they fall asleep >.>
 

Guffe

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Jul 12, 2009
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A slight lean forward would be my way of sitting.
*runs to the toilet to check how I sit*
Usually I also have my elbows on my thighs...
 

Owyn_Merrilin

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May 22, 2010
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I lean forward, because it helps things... move. The human body is meant to squat when relieving itself[footnote]so yes, those Asian squat toilets are actually the right idea, not Western style commodes[/footnote], and it's actually got mechanisms to make it harder to poop when sitting up or laying down (so you don't crap yourself when you don't want to, presumably.) Leaning forward gets you closer to that natural position. Putting a stool[footnote]No, not /that/ kind of stool, a step stool.[/footnote] under your legs while leaning forward helps even more.

And now you know probably more about the human excretory system than you ever wanted to.
 
Aug 19, 2010
611
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Owyn_Merrilin said:
I lean forward, because it helps things... move. The human body is meant to squat when relieving itself[footnote]so yes, those Asian squat toilets are actually the right idea, not Western style commodes[/footnote], and it's actually got mechanisms to make it harder to poop when sitting up or laying down (so you don't crap yourself when you don't want to, presumably.) Leaning forward gets you closer to that natural position. Putting a stool[footnote]No, not /that/ kind of stool, a step stool.[/footnote] under your legs while leaning forward helps even more.

And now you know probably more about the human excretory system than you ever wanted to.
... I feel unclean after reading all that...
 

Casual Shinji

Should've gone before we left.
Legacy
Apr 4, 2020
17,359
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I NEVER sit back!

You know that statue The Thinker? Yeah, that's how I sit.
 

Wadders

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Aug 16, 2008
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Yep, standard elbows-on-thighs pose from me. Apparently there's a 'proper' way to sit while you poop, to maximize relaxation of all the relevant muscles and make the whole thing an easier and generally more enjoyable experience.

It's basically a natural squat. like this:

Why the fuck is he wearing a watch though? I mean, he's totally nude, but for some reason the artist drew a watch. It's not like he needs it when demonstrating the optimum pooping position.
 

Scarim Coral

Jumped the ship
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Apr 30, 2020
18,157
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UK
Forward, I mean toliet are not exactly like office chair when the big comfy back.
 

The Funslinger

Corporate Splooge
Sep 12, 2010
6,150
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All I know is I exclusively refer to going for a shit as "claiming the Porcelain Throne of Westeros".
 

Legion

Were it so easy
Oct 2, 2008
7,190
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TheRightToArmBears said:
You're doing it wrong! You're supposed to sit facing the cistern, so you have a place to put your papers and inkpot.
A South Park reference is the correct answer to an otherwise disturbing thread.

I mean seriously, why would you want to know?
 

Blunderboy

New member
Apr 26, 2011
2,224
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Butters, would you mind answering this for me?



Thanks Butters.

OT - The normal way, but Butters has a bloody good point.
 

Quijiboh

New member
Mar 24, 2011
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I tend to be holding something like a book or an iPod, so I lean forward so as not to be dangling it precariously over the bowl.
 
Aug 19, 2010
611
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Legion said:
I mean seriously, why would you want to know?
No particular reason. The idea to question the general population came to me while sitting on a toilet (shocker), and tried leaning back, and found it rather uncomfortable.
 
Dec 15, 2009
192
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Definitely forwards, unless I'm going to be in there for a while in which case I might shift around a bit. It makes it easier to read a book or the screen of my phone... Don't look at me like that! You all do it to, dammit!
 

Owyn_Merrilin

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May 22, 2010
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Pohaturon said:
Owyn_Merrilin said:
I lean forward, because it helps things... move. The human body is meant to squat when relieving itself[footnote]so yes, those Asian squat toilets are actually the right idea, not Western style commodes[/footnote], and it's actually got mechanisms to make it harder to poop when sitting up or laying down (so you don't crap yourself when you don't want to, presumably.) Leaning forward gets you closer to that natural position. Putting a stool[footnote]No, not /that/ kind of stool, a step stool.[/footnote] under your legs while leaning forward helps even more.

And now you know probably more about the human excretory system than you ever wanted to.
... I feel unclean after reading all that...
Yeah, I tried to be all technical about it, but that somehow made it worse. The "stool" joke in the footnotes probably didn't help matters either. Although at least I didn't post a picture, like Wadders here:

Wadders said:
Yep, standard elbows-on-thighs pose from me. Apparently there's a 'proper' way to sit while you poop, to maximize relaxation of all the relevant muscles and make the whole thing an easier and generally more enjoyable experience.

It's basically a natural squat. like this:

Why the fuck is he wearing a watch though? I mean, he's totally nude, but for some reason the artist drew a watch. It's not like he needs it when demonstrating the optimum pooping position.
 
Aug 19, 2010
611
0
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Owyn_Merrilin said:
Pohaturon said:
Owyn_Merrilin said:
I lean forward, because it helps things... move. The human body is meant to squat when relieving itself[footnote]so yes, those Asian squat toilets are actually the right idea, not Western style commodes[/footnote], and it's actually got mechanisms to make it harder to poop when sitting up or laying down (so you don't crap yourself when you don't want to, presumably.) Leaning forward gets you closer to that natural position. Putting a stool[footnote]No, not /that/ kind of stool, a step stool.[/footnote] under your legs while leaning forward helps even more.

And now you know probably more about the human excretory system than you ever wanted to.
... I feel unclean after reading all that...
Yeah, I tried to be all technical about it, but that somehow made it worse. The "stool" joke in the footnotes probably didn't help matters either. Although at least I didn't post a picture, like Wadders here:

Wadders said:
Yep, standard elbows-on-thighs pose from me. Apparently there's a 'proper' way to sit while you poop, to maximize relaxation of all the relevant muscles and make the whole thing an easier and generally more enjoyable experience.

It's basically a natural squat. like this:

Why the fuck is he wearing a watch though? I mean, he's totally nude, but for some reason the artist drew a watch. It's not like he needs it when demonstrating the optimum pooping position.
Good point... that shit's disturbing...
[small]huehuehuehuehueheuhuhe[/small]
 

smokeyninjas

New member
Apr 5, 2010
72
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Definitely forwards while reading my phone if at work or on my laptop if in the house.

Multitask that shit out.