Tryzon?s Nonsensical Gaming Trips #37
Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories (PS2, 2007) (Also on PSP)
Remember when GTA was primarily about having fun? Stealing a Rhino, turning on Flying Cars and going on a rampage? A ludicrous cast of characters who you somehow end up helping but then eventually boot them off and take over their empire? Good times. 2D GTA started it all and remains entertaining to this day, but the 6th generation?s 3D GTAs are what hold up as timeless. For the purposes of convenience, I shall refer to this period as ?The GTA Golden Age?.
I know what you?re all wondering, and yes, it is my opinion that GTA IV is when it all fell apart. Granted, you can still cause havoc and mayhem, and you still meet from freaks from time to time, but something?s missing. The magic?s been taken away and replaced with dreary realism and unnecessary gameplay alterations. Don?t think I?m just an ignorant GTA IV hater, though; I?ve played it all the way through twice and enjoyed myself, not to mention had a riot playing with mates online, but it doesn?t even come close to deserving the seemingly endless awards, perfect scores and record-breaking sales that it received on release. I appreciate that they did something different with it, and they could have done far worse, but when I think GTA, I think mindless murderisation of whoever and whatever I please, not ?hey, cousin, let?s go bowling!?
Ever since GTA IV came along and ?revolutionised? the series, fans everywhere found themselves split into two groups: those who resent the move to tedious real life and miss the lunacy of the old days, and those who see the newer games as a step in the right direction and a big improvement. I?d call them Traditionalists and Radicalists respectively, and fit neatly into the former. Many of my comrades and I, angry at Rockstar?s abandonment of its roots, have since moved on to things like Saints Row, which I see as the true successor to San Andreas. In terms of disappointment, GTA IV is the equivalent of Driv3r, and my pick for the most overrated game of the 7th generation thus far.
Liberty City Stories and Vice City Stories tend to get unjustly left out of discussions from my experience, largely because they were always intended to be on the PSP and only ended up on the PS2 when Rockstar realised that everyone had a PS2 and not a whole load of folk had PSPs. A similar thing happened with China Town Wars on the DS, which may be the only GTA game in history to not meet sales expectations.
Regardless, the fact of the matter is that if you don?t care about portability or multiplayer like me, then the PS2 versions are definitely the way to go: it?s easier to see what the smeg?s going on; the framerate, draw distance and such are improved; you don?t necessarily need headphones to get good sound quality; the controls benefit hugely from the second analogue stick; Vice City Stories even has a couple of new side missions and stuff, making it truly definitive. On top of all that, I?ve found that the PS2 ports are a few quid cheaper, so the value is unprecedented.
The original Vice City has always been tied with San Andreas for first place in the GTA world championship, I say, as its setting and style are certainly superior but San Andreas simply makes some considerable gameplay additions and refinements, though the stupid RPG elements can jump in front of a combine harvester. Bearing this in mind, the idea of a game set in Vice City that has some of San Andreas? fixes sounds like complete perfection, which is why acquiring Vice City Stories has been a personal reason to live of mine since I learnt of its existence. It?s also historically significant, as it may be the last GTA instalment of its kind, and the swan song of The Golden Age. Question is, does it send the era off with a bang?
If this was Just Cause, I'd totally chav that chopper.
It?s 1984, two years before the ?proper? Vice City, and the hydrophobic Tommy Vercetti has been replaced by Victor ?Vic? Vance, brother to the super-smooth Lance Vance and the series? second black main protagonist. With a druggie mother and a sick sibling (not Lance, but another one) whose medical bills need paying, Vic joined the Army as there weren?t many other choices for him. The game begins and he starts doing favours for a crooked sergeant, which eventually sends him crashing into a life of crime, despite not wanting to get involved. You bump into some new faces and a number of old friends, like Lance and Umberto (who?s still obsessed with your love dumplings), though quite why Love Fist (my favourites) weren?t included is something I?d gladly take a broken bottle to somebody?s throat over. Phil Collins, who you might be familiar with, actually plays himself in a minor role. It?s nice to have some Brits around, though I?d take Kent Paul any day. No offence to Phil, of course. Rockstar North is based in Scotland, you know.
Vic does the ?reluctant criminal? thing well, and isn?t held back by all the daft ?respect for da hood, innit? nonsense like C.J. was. It?s nice to have a black lead who doesn?t feel compelled to do such things for once, so I probably do prefer him to San Andreas? anti-hero, but I?m not sure he beats Tommy?s temperamental wit. Plus Vic doesn?t completely fit the silly ?80s vibe, I feel, though that?s debatable. Either way, were strong characterisation and believable motivation ever going to be the main focus of a Vice City game?
Talk to any Vice City fan and the conversation will inevitably shift to the music. Precisely why that is couldn?t be simpler: Vice City has one of the greatest game soundtracks ever, with glorious ?80s Rock, some Pop and even a bit of Latino whatnot. No other GTA has ever approached such quality in the sound department. At least, until now?Vice City Stories is just as beautiful-sounding as its big brother, despite having an entirely new selection of tunes. The late Dio?s ?Holy Diver?, Quiet Riot?s ?Metal Health?, Kiss? ?Lick it Up and Accept?s ?Balls to the Wall? are right up there with Loverboy?s ?Working for the Weekend?, but V-Rock as a station is almost entirely fluff-fee and pretty much always what I?m tuned to. There?s a reason so many tracks from these games ended up in Guitar Hero, you know. As a bonus, the intro has an original piece which is comparably rad to Vice City?s theme. My only niggle? Once again, no frakking Queen!
Espantoso, Flash FM, Wave 103, VCPR and some others are back as well, for better or worse. Plus there are some so-so new stations to stand in for those that will take their place later in the series? universe, but why they bothered with those when all we need is V-Rock?s awesomeness and VCPR?s hilarity is a mystery. Maurice has apparently always been a man with unrealistic ambitions, and why Michelle hates him so much is explained all too well over the air waves. Park on the beach and let the whole saga unfold. It?s priceless.
The almighty folk at Rockstar have finally blessed us mere mortals and allowed us to swim in Vice City?s waters?for the most part. Though you can indeed fall in the water and paddle about freely, they made the odd decision to put in a stamina bar for just such an occasion, which limits the time you can stay afloat for. This almost never becomes an issue, simply because you have more than plenty of seconds to get back on your boat or reach the shore, but the mechanic?s inclusion is puzzling. There doesn?t even seem to be a cheat for it, so we must make do. At any rate, Timmy Vermicelli can be laid to rest at last.
The car handling is as wonderful as ever. I just wish they hadn't gone on to break it...
This next problem is in Liberty City Stories too: that of no longer being able to grab walls and hoist yourself over them, ala San Andreas. Any obstacle above chest height is impassable, and though this doesn?t come into play a whole lot, it gets mighty aggravating when it does. In extreme cases, getting trapped might actually mean you wind up full of holes, which is understandably vexing. Such a little feature made fleeing the filth that bit less troublesome after shooting up the train station in San Fiero, but alas.
Perhaps the biggest new thing is the whole crime empire-building jazz. After a certain point in the story, you can attack gang hideouts and convert them into one of various elicit business types, from brothels to drug labs. Doing so is the main way of generating moolah, and there are also some mini-tasks to do that increase your overall earnings and can prove briefly diverting, like ferrying girls between clients and running over any blokes who don?t pay. Your operations will get attacked by rivals at random, and not fending them off in time will leave the building in need of either repair or another cleansing. I didn?t expect much from this whole concept, and it?s entirely optional, but I still spent about two hours systematically conquering all thirty sites for some reason. I don?t even know why, but it was distracting.
Many of the missions follow the standard ?go here, shoot them, pick up MacGuffin, get back to base with entire city after you? format, but there are also some pleasant oddities to be found. ?Brawn of the Dead? sees you picking off zombies (oh yes) in a shopping centre with a shotgun and then keeping them away from a record shop using only a katana. It?s quite extraordinary, and reminds me of ?Slash TV? from Liberty City Stories, in which you chainsawed guys in suits from a Smash TV-esque camera perspective. Racing around town in an Infernus while hitting special exploding cars to keep things interesting and being shouted at by a German transsexual is equally?stimulating. You also find an on-rails shooting segment here and there, and though some of them can in frustrating, they?re also insanely enjoyable more often than not.
The quests in general aren?t too difficult, and there?s precious little like some of the masochistically hard bits in Vice City. That segment where you have to rescue Lance within a VERY strict time limit without getting murdered by the legions of armed guards and then make it home through a sea of suicidal cars gives me nightmares to this day, as does the one that involves delicately jumping between buildings on a bike. The best missions tend to not put too much weight on the shooting, which is definitely the way to go, since even though Vice City Stories? gunplay is arguably the best of The Golden Age, that?s still not particularly high-quality, let?s face it. Car-based and unique levels are where it?s at, man. Need I remind you of the gems mentioned above?
There?s a selection of alternate outfits to find that can be accessed from any time at your safehouses. This is nice, as Vic?s standard blue top and jeans can?t hope to match Tommy?s Hawaiian shirt for pure ?80s WIN. And you can just pick them all from one convenient place and they won?t vanish whenever you get Busted this time, unlike in Vice City. I actually like garish Pastel Suit, even though I probably shouldn?t. They missed the perfect opportunity to dress up the character as Mr. T like in San Andreas, mind.
You find a handful of death-dealers you haven?t seen before, including a jumbo machinegun, a fancier version of the one-shot pistol and some unusual melee devices, but you?ll still find yourself returning to the trusty rocket launcher and minigun whenever possible. Why fix what isn?t broken?
This is my rifle...
There also aren?t very many new vehicles to be found other than the machinegun-toting mini-'copter and the much-hyped jet skis, but there are a few toys that have never been in Vice City, at least: quadbikes are gits to drive but great off-road; the police bikes have been borrowed from San Andreas, meaning that legging it down narrow alleys doesn?t guarantee safety; finally, forklifts are completely useless but amusing on those long summer afternoons when tipping cars over to create giggles seems like the best way to pass the time.
Something that puzzles me is how Vice City Stories handles that legendary recurring issue in GTA games: traditionally, getting Wasted or Busted means either a re-load or having to tediously restock on armour and weapons. Admittedly, everybody just cheats, but that?s beside the point. Vice City Stories pretty much solves the problem completely, because you can instantly buy back all your gizmos without trouble outside every hospital and police station for a paltry sum. You can also skip a long trip when replaying some quests. Why does this puzzle me? Because GTA IV, the later game released on more powerful systems, doesn?t do this. Granted, it?s the first episode to have mid-mission checkpoints, and you only get your guns taken away when you?re Busted at least, but quite why they didn?t stick to the winning formula discovered by Vice City Stories is a legitimate enigma.
What makes Vice City Vice City is the constant barrage of cynical stabs at ?80s America and all the weird but brilliant stuff that was going on. Along with the mad fashion and politics, you?ve got the adverts for overly expensive products whose sole purpose is to make you look more manly and so forth. It?s absolutely ingenious in places, with one of the best examples being the return of Jack Howitzer, the action star whose movies about nuking defenceless Asian villages for the crimes of communism and not being American are truly spleen-burstingly funny. As a huge fan of cheesy Arnie and Stallone flicks, those parodies really speak to me. I still maintain that Total Recall is the greatest thing ever put to film. Yes, even better than Muppet Treasure Island. Commando and Eraser are fighting over third place. Just for extra excellence, the hidden packages of yesteryear have been usurped by a flock of red balloons that need popping. Ninety-nine of them, in fact. I see what you did there, Rockstar.
And Vice City is almost precisely as you recall it, with just a few cosmetic changes here and there, like how the Sunshine Autos building hasn?t been built yet so the business is in a less shiny-looking spot next door, or the fact that V-Rock doesn?t appear to use that building near the stadium as their studio. You won?t even notice for the most part, though I dislike how the bike shop with the breakable window and stealable PCJ-600 near the biker bar are gone, along with the ramp around the corner which I must have spent hours just charging up and seeing how many bones in poor Tommy?s body I could break. Ah well.
Vice City is just a lovely kind of size, too: not so big that you need a plane to get anywhere, like in San Andreas and especially Just Cause, but not so ickle that you can?t have some epic car chases with the rozzers. You sometimes hear sandbox games being hyped up as having twenty gazillion square miles of arid desert to trek across, and my eternal reaction is to question at what point the people responsible forgot the idiom, ?quality over quantity?. Maybe Vice City could be a bit less flat in places, but there are just so many groovy places to see and destroy that it ceases to matter. If in doubt, grab a chopper and soar to your next objective, cursing those big planes at the airport for not letting you nick ?em.
[img width=500 height= 350]http://www.ps2vicio.com/imagenes1/PS2/Grand_Theft_Auto_Vice_City_Stories/Grand_Theft_Auto_Vice_City_Stories_2.jpg[/img]
The glitz, the glamour, the guns...Vice City is my kinda place.
The glitz, the glamour, the guns...Vice City is my kinda place.
I?m being completely honest when I say that the only major blemishes Vice City Stories has are the same ones that haunt every Golden Age GTA. For instance, it has that astronomically annoying thing with the targeting system where civilians are just as likely to be locked onto as maniacs with AK-47s and no dress sense. The random, glitchy nature of how cars spawn can mean that teeth-grinding accidents occur, like being run down and killed by a terrified driver as you run towards the final goal in a mission, say. Perhaps worst of all, the lack of checkpoints during missions I hinted at earlier can and will drive you to punching the nearest passer-by once in a while. These are undeniable faults however you look at them, but specifically criticising Vice City Stories for something that Rockstar did for all these games is hardly fair.
However, the fact is that GTA fans are long-accustomed to these kinds of things, which does beg the question of how the games would be received if they came out for the first time nowadays, in a world where people hadn?t come to accept that terrific games can still have blatant chinks in the chain? It?s like how I probably wouldn?t love Star Wars: Battlefront half as much if it was some faceless soldiers storming an anonymous ball of ice in unremarkable walking troop transports. Ah, the power of branding.
Vice City Stories is a GTA game through and through, with all the ups and downs that comes packaged with. You will doubtless find times where the clunkier bits don?t work in quite the way they should, but they will be utterly crushed into oblivion by the other 97% of the experience, which is non-stop pleasure in its simplest form that makes you feel like the prince of the universe. This is at least as much a classic as any other GTA of its time, and I couldn?t imagine how better to end an age. I love this game. I LOVE it. And you?ll love it too.
I could have really just shortened this entire review down to a few sentences and gotten the exact same point across: Vice City Stories is more Vice City, with a few things inserted and a few things extricated. Vice City 2. If you?ve been moping about the downfall of your beloved GTA of late, then this is your salvation. PSP, PS2, it?s all good. Just make sure you play it somehow.
P.S. The great Dio may no longer be with us, but his appearance in The Pick of Destiny means he is truly immortal. Then again, who wants to live forever?
A greater God of Rock there never was. Now grant me a wish.
