Poll: Is Confessing to a Girl a Good Move?

Nuclear Nuke

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Sep 20, 2012
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So...there's this girl that I like, and I don't know if i should tell her or not. We're not exactly friends, but we say "Hi," and stuff like that occasionally. I don't know how she feels. Please state if I should/shouldn't tell her and why. It would help if I get advice from both genders and both sides of this (male, female, and people who have gone through this same situation, and/or have had someone confess to them.

What should I do?
 

TheRightToArmBears

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Dec 13, 2008
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If all your contact is saying 'hi' occasionally then I think it will probably go very, very badly. You need to get to know eachother first.
 

manic_depressive13

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Dec 28, 2008
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How do you know you like her if you barely know her? At least have a friendly coffee or lunch with her first to find out if she's someone you're capable of holding a conversation with.
 

Lilani

Sometimes known as CaitieLou
May 27, 2009
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As others have said, if all of your contact is really limited to saying "Hi" as you pass, then it's very unbelievable you actually know her well enough to have gained informed feelings about her. I think love at first sight can happen, however speaking as a female, if a guy I barely know were to just come up and confess to me I'd be more than a little creeped out. So as ArmBears said, get to know her first. Don't just say hi the next time you see her, talk with her a bit. Do that a few times, and in the process get to know her more. Find out if you actually like her even after knowing her, learn her interests, become friends with her. Then after a while if she responds well and the timing seems right, then make a move. Maybe start with opening doors and seeing how she reacts.

Good luck! :)
 

Arthran

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Nov 18, 2009
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After recent events I've come to the conclusion that brutal honesty is the best policy when it comes to love/relationships.

But to echo others here, dont let infatuation/attraction overpower your common sense. Spend a little time trying to get to know her first before telling her. Make sure that you arent just attracted to her and that there's a basis there for something more. If it turns out you have no connection on most things, then there's no point, if it turns out she has an awesome personality to go with the obvious attraction for her, then let nothing stand in your way in trying for her!

Good luck either way!
 

Galletea

Inexplicably Awesome
Sep 27, 2008
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Yeah, not much more to add here. If you get to know her a bit better first, then you can always casually ask her out and gauge her reaction from there.

Jumping straight in there is probably more likely going to intimidate her than anything else, so try to get to know her a bit better first.
 

twobeef

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Feb 4, 2012
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Here's a sane, reasonable thing to say to this girl:

"Hey, I'm sorry to bug you, but I've seen you in here a lot before. Would you like to go get a cup of coffee sometime?"

You shouldn't confess to this girl that you're harboring a huge crush on her, but if you want to get to know her better, it wouldn't be hard to get to know someone on a casual date. It's not entirely out of the ordinary for people who don't know each other very well to go out on a single date just to see how it goes. The worst thing that could happen is that she says she's not interested - which is a better worst thing than how she could react if you told her that you've been having daydreams about her from the corner and you're already thinking of marrying her.
 

Suijen

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Apr 15, 2009
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twobeef said:
Here's a sane, reasonable thing to say to this girl:

"Hey, I'm sorry to bug you, but I've seen you in here a lot before. Would you like to go get a cup of coffee sometime?"

You shouldn't confess to this girl that you're harboring a huge crush on her, but if you want to get to know her better, it wouldn't be hard to get to know someone on a casual date. It's not entirely out of the ordinary for people who don't know each other very well to go out on a single date just to see how it goes. The worst thing that could happen is that she says she's not interested - which is a better worst thing than how she could react if you told her that you've been having daydreams about her from the corner and you're already thinking of marrying her.
This is an excellent post. Asking her out for a coffee signals your interest, and that should be enough. There was a girl in college who I never had the guts to ask out (she was absolutely beautiful by the way) and I've regretted it ever since. I'd rather have made an ass out of myself than to live thinking about what could have been.
 

Nuclear Nuke

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Sep 20, 2012
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Sorry for being unspecific guys. See, this is in High school... and we have 3 classes together. Again, sorry for being unspecific, hopefully this will clear things up a bit. Sorry!
 

NinjaSniperAssassin

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Sep 19, 2012
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As others have said, confessing your undying love for someone you don't really know is a bit much but you should absolutely ask her out for a cup of coffee. Or if that's a little too uncomfortable, since you have classes together you can ask her for help with your homework. Also, group projects. If you get asked to make your own groups, ask her to work with you. So many better options than straight-up telling her you're in love with her!
 
Oct 27, 2010
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You should introduce yourself and ask if she wants to hang out some time. That's the best way to go man, get to know her first or you'll sort of come off as a creeper.
 

Pfheonix

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Apr 3, 2010
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Nuclear Nuke said:
So...there's this girl that I like, and I don't know if i should tell her or not. We're not exactly friends, but we say "Hi," and stuff like that occasionally. I don't know how she feels. Please state if I should/shouldn't tell her and why. It would help if I get advice from both genders and both sides of this (male, female, and people who have gone through this same situation, and/or have had someone confess to them.

What should I do?
Why shouldn't you? You aren't close friends, so you won't break anything, and if she doesn't like you, meh. Don't blab it, though. Just ask her to coffee, hang out, et cetera. You'll either find a girl you like, a friend you like, or someone you'll just say hi to every once in a while.
 

Suijen

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Apr 15, 2009
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Nuclear Nuke said:
Sorry for being unspecific guys. See, this is in High school... and we have 3 classes together. Again, sorry for being unspecific, hopefully this will clear things up a bit. Sorry!
WHA-?! Perfect then! Try to partner up with her in class projects and start saying more than just "hello". You have a year and spend about 3 hours a day with her already. Go for broke mang.
 

exessmirror

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Apr 26, 2011
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go for a blitz charm, just talk to her in your breaks and after school while you do that you should heavily flirt. do that for 2/3 weeks. then tell her

captcha: gung ho
fuck yeah captcha
 

gamefreakbsp

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Sep 27, 2009
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High school is a very social environment. Strike up a conversation with her before one of your classes start. Just some simple topic you know you can talk about. Then after you do that a FEW times, you will have a better idea of what you want, for starters. Then, if you still feel that way, make a move. Nothing over-the-top, just you know, coffee. Or some equivalently casual date activity.
 

HumourlessBaboon

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Oct 14, 2012
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the darknees abyss said:
Just tell the wrose that could happen is you never speek to her again
I hate to be unhelpful, but this just isn't true anymore. In today's society there are so many new ways to ruin somebody's life. Facebook, for example.
The safest option is to quietly introduce yourself, and hey, want to go get some coffee sometime? I combined that with waiting for the end of the school year so it wouldn't be a big thing and wouldn't follow me through high school if I got rejected.
I did get rejected, but I have no regrets, and would have come across much worse and creepily suddenly "confessing my feelings in a burst of hope and confessioning" (which I was seriously considering).
I think that she'll understand unless you make yourself sound like a stalker. Bursts of passion work great in movies, but in life they're just begging for a restraining order.
Also, go for a neutral activity that can be interpreted as just being a cool friend. Then, after food (food is important!) ask, after the two of you know each other well and you're sure you want her to be more than just a friend. If she asks first, DEFINITE plus. :)
You're doing a good job of being patient so far, don't ruin it by scaring her with a sudden feeling exposure when she doesn't really know you.
Hope this helps!