Poll: Is it sexist to think it's worse (as a man) to hit a woman than another man?

omicron1

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Imat said:
omicron1 said:
I think this falls not under sexism, but chivalry. Racism/sexism/otherism tends to be applied to negative attitudes towards those deemed inferior, while positive attitudes/actions don't fall under the same label. If you're not hitting a girl because "it wouldn't be worth it" or similar, that might be sexism, but if you're not hitting a girl because you're trying to be nice - even if you're just trying to be nice to her because of her gender - it's not really sexist at all.
Many say that chivalry is, itself, sexist, a statement which I, myself, reject outright.

Chivalry in the Middle Ages may have been sexist as many claim, I really can't put myself in the mindset of an 1100's knight with nothing better to do than chase after women using the power of charm and subservience (to an extent), but I can say that I try to be what I believe to be "chivalrous" towards women, and not all of them appreciate it. Chivalry isn't about "protecting the weaker sex" or "helping women do things they couldn't possibly do on their own, because they're women," the objective is to help for the sake of being a gentleman, to do something which may not be in any way directly beneficial to yourself because you want to be a nice guy or a good person. Chivalry is not sexist, nor is it dead. There are simply noticeably fewer practitioners of this worthy art.
And those who still practice it have at least a chance of being appreciated by those upon whom they do so, and so have a leg up in relationships.
 

Casual Shinji

Should've gone before we left.
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I once made a girl cry by critisizing her skill at boardgames. This one act already made me feel guilty beyond believe, so I can't even imagine how bad I'd feel if I actually hit a girl. Unless ofcourse it's Carrie-Anne Moss from Memento, she had it coming.

Is it sexist? Probably, but in the end I'm just a big dumb male.
 

Blackjack 222

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Om Nom Nom said:
A modern reason for not hitting a woman would be that women take more pride in their physical appearance than men (rule-of-thumb, there are some vain men about, and slobbish women) and as such physical marks from violence would cause a fair bit more distress than simple pain.
And would stand out more causing uproar from her friends and family regardless of the nature of the dispute would cause more problems in the long run.

A boy goes home with a shiner his dad will tell him to touch up; if his daughter comes home with a shiner he will go out for someones blood and he will get that blood.
 

KiKiweaky

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Some girls think they can batter men and not get hit back, I've seen it happen in clubs before and it aint nice. For a regular person getting a smack in the face hurts regardless of who its from. Fair enough I didnt know what had started it, but the guy was walking away and was being clouted around the head without retaliating.

Was on a bus before and sat down the back with a group of about 10 girls that were 15 years old sat behind me, one of them started smacking me in the back of the head for a bit of a laugh. I asked her to stop but she kept on going going and going.... So I stood up turned around, she stood up and roared 'You gona fucking hit me??', I grabbed he and fired her back down the bus into her friends. They got off soon after but thank god they did, I dont know what would have happened if she kept going.

I was pretty pissed about the whole thing, but surprised that I showed restraint like that. The only thing that stopped me from dragging her off the bus by her hair and beating her half to death was the fact that passers by seeing an 18 year old guy beating the snot out of a 15 year old girl was the fact that it was a good way for me to end up in hospital. She would have deserved every second of it too, so no I don't think its sexist, just outdated.

Girls are more than capable of getting stuck in.
 

Charley

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The self-defense point has cropped up a few times, and I don't dispute the logic of hitting a woman from whom you were under threat.

Maybe an edit to the question - is it worse to hit a woman in anger than to hit a man in anger for the same reason. This one is a hypothetical question - I'm thinking of things like romantic drama movies; the cheated-on man will often punch the adulterous man but won't then spin round and knock his girlfriend/wife for six.

I wasn't quite sure what to expect when I asked the question in the first place, it's actually quite interesting. It's also interesting that there are so many votes on "yes it is sexist" and comparatively few forum posts explaining the reasoning behind that position.
 

The Heik

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Oct 12, 2008
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Charley said:
So, I've just had a brief tangential 'argument' in another forum thread on here about violence against women. The whole thing started based on someone's comment that they'd happily hit a man or a woman.

Now, I personally think that's pretty wrong from the outset, I'm not a fan of actual (i.e. non-fictional) violence (against anyone) - it's unnecessary. One thing that particularly bothers me is the idea of actual male violence against women. Not because women are weaker, or need protecting or any of that nonsense, but because we're supposed to have evolved past men throwing their physical weight around. In my opinion, it's abhorrent. I was raised that you never raise a hand against a woman, and to be honest I've never questioned that - it just seems like the right way to think.

Whilst that may well be an old-fashioned approach for a man to take, I don't know. However, I think it's unfair to brand me as sexist because I think it's wrong to hit a woman. I'm not looking for any arguments (or to make any digs following the thread that's prompted this) but I am curious as to what other people think - hence the dreaded poll.

One thing I'd like to know, is that if you think it's sexist, please do say why.

For the record, I'm happy for the person I was disagreeing with to join the discussion - like I said, I'm curious as to whether or not my stance on this is considered out-of-line rather than trying to prove who's right or wrong.

==

EDIT - I thought of a way of expressing what I mean that might make it a bit clearer. I think, if I hit a woman (for whatever reason), I would be significantly more ashamed of myself than if I hit a man (again for whatever reason). Assuming the act itself is equally wrong in both circumstances (i.e. you shouldn't hit anyone) that's how I'd feel about it.

Anyway, any situation in which the two sexes are treated differently is sexist. Now granted, biological differences are usually exempt (can't expect pregnant men to be treated the same as pregnant women can we?), but any concepts from society like men hitting girls being bad should be killed with fire because they are just plain wrong. Women are not the weaker sex. They do not need protection any more than anyone else. They are the equal of anyone else in society, and should be treated as such in every way.
 

SkyeNeko

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Well it's not really discrimination... women are just physically more fragile than men are D= i think youre more likely to break something cause we just have less mass to us

EDIT: Yes women are the physically weaker sex. thats not bad or anything, but you just cant say that a woman has the same amount of bone density or muscle mass as a man.
 

Xojins

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Charley said:
Xojins said:
Short answer: Yes, it is sexist.
Can we have the long answer that includes your reason, please? That's the point of this thread - there's clearly a divide here, and just throwing in a 'yes' or 'no' isn't helping the discussion a great deal.

Thank
Yes, it is sexist because it separates women as being physically and mentally inferior. It says that women are frail and can't handle the physical or emotional trauma associated with being assaulted, whereas if it were two men it suddenly becomes generally acceptable. On top of that, in modern times women (particularly feminists) have been fighting for superiority equality and an end to sexism. Therefore, if women expect this type of equality there shouldn't be any kind of stigma about male on female violence because it would no longer be sexist. But there is, so it is. Then on top of that we can talk about the double standard for when a woman is violent with a man; more often than not women is given the benefit of the doubt solely because they're women.

Welcome.

/rant
 

trueluigi7

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Bihac said:
trueluigi7 said:
I would never hit a woman, except if it was Self-Defense of myself or another person,
So you would hit a male for other reasons?

Anyway, to clarify, personally, while I practice martial arts and this means that I spar with both men and women, and we do pull our punches for sparring, I do not pull my punch any more for one group than the other.

In any other conflict, I simply believe that, you should meet the opponents intended force with your own, irrelevant of their gender.

Finnaly I am in now way condoning attacking members of either gender for no reason, force should only be used in self defense.
Well I do sometimes joke around with my friends with punches, and we do sometimes actually fight for fun, not really sparring I would say though, and if I was at war with somebody and I a soldier...well that part doesn't matter and very unlikely. Anyways I am against violence and I am quite a peaceful person, in fact I don't even like getting angry or anyone getting angry I find anger to be pointless as well, but you do have a point, is there any other reason to hit anyone other than self-defense? no there isn't male or female.

I do not however think thought that it is a sexist thought to think it is wrong to hit a woman as a man, unless the reason being "women are weaker then men" or something of the sort
 

Charley

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Xojins said:
Charley said:
Xojins said:
Short answer: Yes, it is sexist.
Can we have the long answer that includes your reason, please? That's the point of this thread - there's clearly a divide here, and just throwing in a 'yes' or 'no' isn't helping the discussion a great deal.

Thank
Yes, it is sexist because it separates women as being physically and mentally inferior. It says that women are frail and can't handle the physical or emotional trauma associated with being assaulted, whereas if it were two men it suddenly becomes generally acceptable. On top of that, in modern times women (particularly feminists) have been fighting for superiority equality and an end to sexism. Therefore, if women expect this type of equality there shouldn't be any kind of stigma about male on female violence because it would no longer be sexist. But there is, so it is. Then on top of that we can talk about the double standard for when a woman is violent with a man; more often than not women is given the benefit of the doubt solely because they're women.

Welcome.

/rant
No seriously - I actually did want to know why you thought it was the case and that's totally fair game, everyone's entitled to their opinion.

One thing that I do think is particularly interesting is that people would rather not discourage (different from encourage) men from hitting women in the name of not being sexist, rather than just reap the "benefits" (if you consider less violence a benefit) of it being a social norm not to do it.

Once again, we're not talking about self-defence here, but situations such as in an argument (or any other situation where you're not about to be injured already).
 

Eri

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Feb 21, 2009
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No men should hit women, no women should hit men. The end of it. As a man, if some woman hit me for an unnecessary reason, I would sure as hell clock her back.
 

mjc0961

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Nov 30, 2009
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I'd happily hit a man or a woman too, as long as there was reason to do so.

But bottom line, saying that's wrong to hit a woman just because she's a woman is absolutely sexist. You're making that decision based on what gender the person is, hence it is sexism. Whether or not that's a bad thing is up to you (obviously it's not on the level of "get back in the kitchen" type stuff), but it still is sexism as you're reaching this decision based on gender and nothing else.

interspark said:
but if, hypothetically (because i dont actually think it's ever happened) a man were the victim of domestic violence, that would be equally bad
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/new...Wii-at-Boyfriend-Hilarity-and-Jailtime-Ensues

I personally find the "hilarity ensues" part of the headline to be tasteless, but there you go, one example of a man being the victim of domestic violence.
 

MASTACHIEFPWN

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Mar 27, 2010
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Women have always wanted equil rights, well if they want them, they should take being hit! XD

Sorry if that offends anyone, but I think the "You can't hit a girl" Thing is childish. If I girl was punching me, I would totally counter attack.
 

Pain Is Inevitable

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Women are inferior, and thus in need of special protection just like children and the mentally disabled.

How could this in any shape or form be interpreted as sexism?
 

teutonicman

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Fuck... it`s split right down the middle. Anyway yes it is sexist to think a man hitting a woman is worse than a man hitting a man. If sexism is about equality then one should have the same disposition about what gender one hits.
 

BlackStar42

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Well, if it's self defense, you have every right to strike back. Sex doesn't come into it. There isn't really another situation where violence is justifiable , so...yeah, I don't think it's sexist.